Paul, this is from back in the thread:
quote:
[Paul]:Instead, you're going to give in to the smear campaigns and jump to the conclusion that he hates America? That's... pretty strong.
[me]: Have to say I'm finding this a bit of an insult, Paul, although I do understand your deep commitment to Obama. I hope that I have presented rational arguments about my concern with respect to what Obama's connection signifies.
I don't think what I concluded was wrong based on what was there, but I did see that once you'd explained, Paul, that you had not meant that I was buying in to smears or questioning O's patriotism. So, yes, the wording matters quite a lot.
You then said that you hadn't meant to insult me with your comment. I'm not sure how I made a mistake in pointing out that I was insulted in the first place, though. (It's happened every once in a while on these boards that people have pointed out that they have felt insulted by what someone has written. usually it was a consequence of misunderstanding) But I would appreciate a private note explaining this because I've missed something.
Anyway , then our private exchange followed.
with respect to Alcyone's accusation:
Alcyone wrote:
When I wrote that I was not basing my reading on anything but the modes that people use to talk about race (at the level of discourse), particularly here in the US (which this election exhibits far and wide). I see some of that language in your post, certainly, and that's what I'm responding to as it echoes some of the language in a lot of the articles I've read.
to which I replied:
You've made a very serious allegation here, Alcyone. I would call this worse than a flame, in fact. What you've implied about me is pretty awful and hurtful.
Alcyone then posted this:
To clarify, I was talking about certain assumptions that are reflected in language especially in what is taken as 'natural' (that's what I mean by discourse) specifically the colorblindness myth. This is not the same as personal criticism, but since not everyone sees that distinction (critique of ideas/personal criticism), it's simply better to put a lid on it now.
Believe me, I'm not implying or suggesting that anyone is a racist.
Which I found contradictory. this was Alcyone's last post directed at me.
Right now I'm not sure what to make of Alcyone's comments, given what you have written. What she, herself, has posted here with respect to my comments remains contradictory, however.
With respect to your personal advice :
And when someone tells you that you misinterpreted them and the offensive implication was not in any way intended, I find it's best to take them at their word and move on.
In fact, that is what I had thought I had done with you personally, Paul
But since Alcyone has yet to tell me that, I can't follow the rest of your advice. I will , howver, should she do so.
A bit of personal advice from me too - please be careful with how you characterise statements when you dismiss people's views that disagree with yours.
You are very right to mention the importance of how we phrase things. And it is always right to acknowledge mistakes and to apologise to those affected by our mistakes.
I'm sorry, but I had to reply - had your last post not hammered me so, I would not have done so. I plead self-defense
this is my last post. I promise
c.
