Carol, you said this:

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As well, our culture is okay with men marrying younger but less so with women marrying younger - hence a widower is more likely to remarry than a widow.
Indeed our culture is okay with men marrying younger women, but less so with women marrying younger men! I assume that most members of these boards are aware of the fact that Dean Cain is a year or so younger than Teri Hatcher. In LnC fanfics, Clark Kent has been given Dean Cain's birthday (in February 1966, I think). But Lois Lane has not been given Teri Hatcher's birthday, because that would make Lois older than Clark Kent, and that would not be appropriate! (Would it?) I'm pretty sure I have seen that Lois Lane was supposedly born in 1967, so that she would be about a year younger than Clark Kent.

As the case of Dean Cain and Teri Hatcher's ages versus Clark Kent and Lois Lanes's ages show, most of us "know" very well what is appropriate when it comes to men and women.

Ann