*** Continuation of Response to Darth Michael's FDK *** APHRODITE: Eros, honey, you should have told me that you were color-blind, sweetie. Mommy could have fixed that problem.
So, it goes ‘slut’ and then ‘laywer’?
Yep. The insults get progressively worse.
Well…that’s just honest competition. All’s fair in love and war, isn’t it?
CLARK: /forms T with his hands/ Time-Out! I don't want anyone to get killed. Okay, ladies, winner takes all in a mud wrestling match.
MAYSON: Excuse me.
LOIS: /cracks neck and knuckles/ I can do that.
Call his newest squeeze and ask her to back off?
CLARK: Hey, Mayson, sorry about calling so late. Could you roll over and tell Mr. Church to have his guys lay off Mike's Cafe Americana? It's really developing a crimp in my relationship with Lois. Thanks.
/points at the one with the Bachelor Auction/ Hmm…there’s also quite a few fics where Lois gets drunk. Intentionally. And then has intimate relations with her partner. Unintentionally, or so she later claims.
So, Lois should go back to Clark's after he's already had Mayson? He might be too tired.
A real drink. A drink of hard alcohol.
ER: /recommends the apple-tini/
Yeah. I just can't see Lois ordering one of those in her current mode.
LOIS: Vodka. And leave the bottle.
She only had one, because she knew how alcohol could ruin someone’s life.
ER: /recalls what happened to Doc Brown./
Yeah. Him too.
How drunken binges start…
ELLEN:
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d025.gif)
To be fair, all the other girls (sic) also think that he’s a superior example of man flesh (sic).
CLARK: Are you implying that Kryptonian bodies don't contain flesh with those remarks?
Yet another reason to hate his girlfriends, huh?
It's always good to have a spare reason.
Lois could also imagine what her life would be like if she continued to allow her partner to make lunkheaded mistakes.
ER: /thinks she'll turn into a cat woman/
I was thinking she'd more likely turn into Robin from HIMYM.
TEMPUS: Now playing in a movie theater near you…
/Tempus and Herb ride again/
TEMPUS: What? No! That's not what I meant at all!
HERB: Tempus, you complete me.
There was one way that would surely get Clark’s attention.
ER: /belly-dancing/ ?
LOIS: No!
I think Michael wants you to try it anyway.
CLARK: /raises hand to second the motion/ It couldn't hurt.
In case he knocks her up?
CLARK: I can impregnate Earth women?
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/konfus/n022.gif)
LOIS: Not the reaction I was expecting.
To prove Mayson is in bed with Bill Church?
Possibly.
So, he should take Mayson into the shower?
MAYSON:
LOIS: I was thinking more Hob's Bay.
Duh! He’s a guy. Clark’s a guy. No attraction lost there.
So, everything has to do with sexual attraction, no matter what the story might be?
She did not say he was doing a human.
CLARK: The ER thinks my girlfriend’s a sexbot?
LOIS: Grrrr.
Girlfriend?
CLARK:
Is that like Pictionary?
LOIS: That’s because I prefer to work with people who are right instead of wrong.
CLARK: But you *like* to work with me, which means I can be right every once in a while.
LOIS: Don't press your luck.
Isn’t it funny how it’s the same situation as it was back when with Lex, only then it was Lois jumping into the bed with the morally-challenged.
No. Because Clark was right both times.
/points at The Pact by KatherineKent/
CLARK: Sooooo, she really wants a building to fall on her and Green Lantern to save the day?
Well, there’s various tropes in regard to this. One has to do with passive-aggressive behavior. The other with a 28-day cycle.
LOIS: *Or* the most obvious choice is the simplest. He's plain wrong.
Maybe Bobby could start by nixing all the locations that would not be it.
BOBBY: Let’s see…Lois’s kitchen would be number one…
This is going to take a while.
LOIS & CLARK’s kids: So? We can say the same thing about basically anything that not toxic waste.
CLARK: What do you mean they've tried your cooking? Great. Now we'll have Family Services on our back.
CLARK: That’s not true. I’d love to please Lois but she isn’t interested. She just asks me to get her a new pack of batteries. Must be all those Ivory Tower marathons she’s always having.
Perhaps she cooks when she's upset and she's constantly needing to replace her smoke detector batteries?
Between chews, he said, “You’ve got to stop dating that ADA Drake woman.”
ER: /totally didn't expect Bobby to go there/
Plus, he doesn’t like the taste of crow. That one time when he yawned while flying back from an all-nighter that been enough to last him a lifetime.
CLARK: Cooked crow is much better.
Not involved with Intergang.
Was Bobby about to tell Clark that Lois was secretly in love with him?
ER: /Thinks this would be a fun development/
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/e015.gif)
Like in “What’s the difference between a college co-ed and an ADA?”
MAYSON: /confused/ I’m not a college co-ed. I have a law degree.
RALPH: I'm going to go with "A sense of humor".
Oooh! That would be a great cover for Mayson. All she has to do is work to the best of her abilities, but sleep with the state’s star witnesses.
So, maybe Mayson has been sleeping with Church this whole time?
That was a very entertaining mid-part. And now, for the grand finale!
I had to up the angst due to the SW:ESB clause.
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
