Just spotted this thread in a brief glance at the boards (woody, what are you doing on these mbs right now? You don't have time for anything but homework, seriously!). Sisterly admonishing aside, I had a few things to say on the issue of treatment of men towards women and vice versa.
You'll notice the twin injunctions in the NT (one of the four books after 1st & 2nd Corinthians, I forget which right now) where Paul writes that a woman must obey her husband, and a man must love his wife. One thing I've read in various places that seems to clarify this for us who look at it with modern eyes and recoil at the word "obey", is that they meant respect (I think it was Elisabeth higher up in this thread mentions this). Men and women are different creatures, innately, in a complementary sort of way, neither one being *better* than the other, but each fulfilling the other. This said, we approach life (and relationships) differently. Men are driven more by respect, and women more by love. When someone did a survey of men and asked them whether they'd prefer to be respected or loved, if they could only have one of the two, they overwhelmingly responded that they would rather be respected. This obviously doesn't mean unquestioning obedience, but a sort of respect for their skills and talents that negates running roughshod over them or ignoring their advice or preferences. I've found this to be very true with my boyfriend--he doesn't like it if I want him to decide everything, but it lights him up when I compliment or otherwise show my respect for his technical skills and knowledge (especially asking his advice on something).
The command for men to love their wives is because women, being creatures who run on love, need to be loved by their husbands. Men might think they, by providing for their families and being responsible heads, have done enough to satisfy their wives, but they need that reminder that they are to give their wives love, not just respect. Hence the twin commands are to elicit that which is not second nature from each of us.
A touch on polygamy and other such things in the Bible (such as the Mosaic writing on men divorcing wives): God started with people who came out of pure paganism. The pagan civilizations in those days did things we would be shocked at. Incest, religious prostitution and human sacrifice, lack of human rights (slavery and other abuses), etc. If you take a look at the background for what was happening at the time the command was given, you'll find they actually *limited* such practices. Through rules regarding being able to support wives properly and divorce them with certificates, wanton polygamy and the treating of women as goods to be traded off at the highest bidder were both restricted, and men couldn't mistreat women and cheat on them while holding onto them as their wives. Being forced to divorce their wife properly limited some of the fooling around they could do without social repercussions. This sort of thing happens over and over. It was a gradual process, transforming the Israelites. You'll notice in the New Testament there still are no actual prohibitions against ordinary men having more than one wife, but the elders, the leaders and examples of the church, were not allowed to have more than one. And now today it's a banned practice in nearly all Christian churches.
