FDK FDK already? Hmmmm. Maybe it's time to post the next part.
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Perhaps stapling my own finger the other day (after stupidly trying to fix my stapler without first removing the staples <thinks staplers are just like guns> ) makes this all the more funny.
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I want to say no, but…
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Actually, I... er... Lois was referring to the HiM kiss, but you seemed a bit confused.
I was?
I wonder if there are any stories out there where Vatman dresses up as Clark Kent to try to seduce Lois Lane. <EW gets naughty ideas>
CLARK:
LOIS:
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You will *not* steal my story, you…you…you *Claude*!
LOIS: <Clark makes her sick like she does with Wrong-Clark> Once you've kissed Clark Kent, there's no going back.
CLARK: Well, golly gee. Thanks, Lois.
LOIS: <considers switching to therapist who does not follow the Freudian school> Did I say Clark Kent? Ooops. I meant Superman. Silly me. I wonder why I keep getting those two confused.
CLARK: <has way too much fun at the expense of his pseudo-girlfriend> I don't know, Lois.
And Lex has a one track mind?
LEX: Business leads to Lois leads to Superman leads to business.
I believe she was undercover while in that outfit.
CAT: Right.
LOIS: About as much as you are undercover when you dress as a $50 hooker.
He realized that sometimes Bridezilla doesn't appear until *after* the wedding.
That’s what divorce guns are for?
Clark hasn't met Mayson yet.
CLARK: Nope. /scratches/ I got this case from Lana.
LOIS: So you *don’t* want to sleep with me?
CLARK: <somehow lost his train of thought> What was the question again?
On that note, I really should go back to PML – The Whole Story some day…
<EW thinks this would be an appropriate course of action>
CLARK: I've seen the way Lois goes ga-ga for Superman. I've never seen, with one notable exception, her ever going the same kind of ga-ga for me.
ER: That’s because Superman dresses like he’s…available while Clark dresses like a monk.
CLARK: But... But... This suit cost me $100!
LEX: Mine cost $2000.
LOIS: And yet, I still wouldn’t put out until after we’re married and I was legally obligated to if we still lived decades ago.
CLARK: Come on. That's not fair. I'm doing what any other hot blooded American male would do if he had my powers, right?
WALLY: Actually…I did never bother to track women by their heartbeat. I just used my x-ray vision. Much easier that way.
NOR: I always knew Kal-El was defective.
ER: The reason she’s still single?
Because no man could pass her back ground check?
LOIS: <does not want to share the future leads she got on international arms dealers, ponzi-artists, bigamists, sociopathic corporate leaders, and other scum> No comment.
So, maybe she should re-evaluate her dating circles?
LOIS: Fraud! That's Linda King's history, not mine!
CLARK: Anyway, do you really think I'd *want* to know about that? Sometimes, ignorance is bliss.
LOIS: I was born that good in bed.
CLARK: <Thinks he got a great idea. Doesn’t yet know it will backfire on him.> I don't have to do what Lois says!
LOIS: Great. You've broken him.
It’s funnier that way, watching the cowgirl breaking-in her pony?
CLARK: /tries to look at own shoulder/ I don’t see a dogtag on my neck saying ‘property of Lois Lane’. Do you?
LOIS: Yes. Keep walking.
ER: He’s also implying that Lois would do all the lifting in their relationship.
CLARK: <think Lois can’t hear him> Wouldn't she do so anyway?
LOIS:
That could be a fun story. Lois and Cat team up to discover the hidden depths of Superman.
CLARK: <doesn’t like threesomes with only one Lois>
ER: I hear Venus got some fine women.
EW: Oh, you mean... <apparently there is a comic about women of Venus>
Apparently. Although, I was just referring to the classic saying…
Like Luthor, Clark appreciates a challenge.
CLARK: What do you mean 'like Luthor'? Now, that's just insulting.
So…unlike with Luthor, Lois doesn’t want to score with him?
LOIS:
That’s *so* last season.
ER: Sorry. And also by just how many Alt-Clarks have already been killed off by their respective Tempus.
That actually doesn't come up in this story.
I think I just realized what causes your stories to…expand.
LOIS: What's wrong with how I dress?
CLARK: I like the way Lois looks.
CAT: There's really no accounting for taste, is there?
The funny part is, that Lois actually dressed quite short in seasons 1 and 2.
ER: I just realized! She’s just like Sheldon. Doesn’t get sarcasm. Is always right. Got a thing for Superman.
For a second there, I thought you meant Sheldon Bender (not Sheldon from BBT) and freaked out.
Sheldon Bender didn’t even pop up at the radar at the time
LOIS: You forgot certified genius.
BENDER: Thank you.
But Lois was talking about the girl's shorts, nothing else.
CLARK: Lois wore a shirt to Stoke's Club? Are you sure? I can't remember one.
ER: So, at least they’d die all together in a nice fireball instead of Dr. Baines dying all alone in a nice fireball?
So, how exactly is that better?
Dying alone is often quoted as a sad thing?
Wow. The Flash is fast.
FLASH: What? She called my name. That's really all it takes.
Sue’s LOIS: Just like Anton!
LOIS: /fist pump/
JIMMY: <can’t believe he finally gets to get with his cousin>
SUPERMAN: Riiiiiight. Clark Kent is my ward.
Quote:
ER: Sent him to meet a bomb?
LOIS: Not on purpose!
ER: Feeling guilty, are we?
LOIS: No! I don't ever feel guilty! <thinks it unfortunate that she now has to train a new partner>
LOIS: And I’m sticking with that story.
ER: What if they *said* they would lower the taxes but then invented a new tax to outweigh the lowered taxes?
EW: Hey, that sounds fairly accurate.
They probably learn it in little-politicians’ class.
Michael
