I'm pretty much in.
Back when I first started to watch the show, my classmates and I talked about it all the time. I was by far the most obsessed with it, but since almost everyone in my class watched the show, it wasn't a problem to talk about it openly and freely.
It all changed when I continued to be a fan while others moved on, particularly the year after, when I graduated from high school and found myself in a new environment, with new friends and all. When I got a computer and discovered fanfic, then it became even more of a secret for me. Telling people that I was a fan of a TV show was one thing that I could still do a little, albeit with a great deal of difficulty. Telling them that I wrote stories about it was impossible, and it's been pretty much impossible for years. When I was in high school, being a fan of a TV show was something normal that didn't make others raise eyebrows... I doubt I would have told them I wrote fanfic if I had then, but at least I made no secret of watching Lois and Clark. It got a little more complicated afterwards, especially when I entered a branch where "culture" sometimes seems very dogmatically defined. :p
Sometimes it creates interesting situations, actually. I have to say that I've had that type of conversation twice in the past week.
It usually start with an innocuous question, such as: "Where are you going for the holiday?" or "Where does that obsession with English come from?" or somesuch. Let's take the former as an example.
X: "Where are you going for the holiday?"
Kaethel: "Italy / England."
X: "Oh? Camping? Staying at a hotel?"
Kaethel: "No, I have a friend there and I'm staying with her for a week."
X: "A French friend?"
Kaethel: "No."
X: "Nice! How did you get to know her?"
Kaethel: "Er... through the... uh... Internet."
Two types of reaction then:
X: (frowns disapprovingly) "Oh."
It's usually very easy to change the subject then; that type of person does it themselves.
or...
X: (raised eyebrow) "Really? On a chat room? What chat room did you go to?"
That's where I have to grumble something and change the subject. I don't feel comfortable telling them about the Lois and Clark connection.
My best friend and her husband know about it, though. Maud was watching the show back on the first year I became a fan, and we actually watched it together. So she knew I was a FoLC from the beginning. I never hid from her that I was hanging out on IRC with people who like that TV show, and she thinks it's great. What she doesn't know... or didn't know until a couple of months ago, is that I write. I don't know why it took me so long to tell her, considering I trust her and know she'd never be judgmental about it. But actually I haven't told her I write fanfic. I just happened to mention in my CV, which she and her husband helped me complete, that one of my hobbies is writing. However, I doubt they have failed to put two and two together then. Actually, neither of them raised an eyebrow when I mentioned writing, which makes me suspect that they've known all along. But the subject was never raised between us since.
).
But considering it took me years to actually hint at it with my best friend, I doubt I'll ever completely come out of the closet. And the reason for that is simple. Writing is something that can be so very personal that sometimes you feel uncomfortable talking about it or sharing it with people who might not understand what's the interest of inventing stories featuring a long-vanished TV show. And saying it out loud means taking the risk of being laughed at, misunderstood, or even rejected. Someone can make a comment that seems funny or smart to them, just to tease you, but because it touches something very deep and very personal, it can easily hurt. I guess that's why I'm staying in the closet.
Kaethel
