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Originally posted by Darth Michael:
To be fair, he has no idea what chocolate limiting would do to Lois. All he can think about is the basic calories/shape-formula.
LOIS: /starts digging in her Rolodex for cheap Russian assassin/
May I recommend "Anton"?

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ER: Is that what they’re calling it these days?
JONATHAN: What exactly are you implying there, son?
ER: /points at diagram, then at photos of Martha and Wayne/
JONATHAN: /pulls out shotgun/ You want to say WHAT about my loyal wife?

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ER: It’s similar. Only with Lex, other things start coming out of her mouth instead of a stream of babble.
LEX: Tongue? I can work with that.
EW: I believe Michael was referring to bees and hot lava.

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It would shift them away from Lois?
LOIS: Works for me.
MEN OF L.U.C.: Oh, please, God, no!

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Natural offsprings to carry on his legacy?
LEX: What part about the cloning-program do you not get? Stupid Reader. Nigel! Niiiigelllll!
clap

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He donating most of the toys Santa distributes during Christmas? Well, he offers them at a moderate discount.
I was implying other naughtiness on Mrs. Claus's part.

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EW: Name of the woman Paul Bender mentioned leaving Lois for in College because Lois was too frigid.
ER: Huh, he actually talks to his nephew.
No, no. Sheldon just gives Paul a slap every once in a while. I mean when Paul ambushed Lex at the Gotham charity picnic.

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Well, there’s apparently always another layer of gunk available for you to discover.
LEX: Michael means I have the heart of an angle. [Linked Image] It's over there, in a jar next to Venus de Milo's arms.

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And option three about Arthur also seeing a stripper on the side.
Chow is cheating on his stripper wife with another stripper? [Linked Image]

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Maybe if he had just dipped his hand in a vat of latex?
CLARK: I thought of that, but I didn't think the layer would be thick enough.

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Does ‘original’ also imply that they are unique pieces?
MRS. COX: [Linked Image]
LEX: I never said that.

VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.