Lois took a deep breath and exhaled. This is it.
She flipped the first and third lock, and opened the door to her apartment.
Hmm…are you trying to suggest that Lois and Lex *didn’t* share a romantic tryst on the eve of their wedding?
Also, why did Lois only lock *two* of her locks?
“Lois,” said the man on the other side of the door. There was a pause before he continued. “You look beautiful as always, darling, but you’re not dressed. Have you forgotten about dinner and ‘Othello’?”
Oh, she’s not *coming* home.
She stepped away from the door to let him enter. “No, Lex. I just decided that I didn’t want to go,” she replied, turning away from him and putting space between them.
OTOH, if we hadn’t seen the other Lois smile, one might think this is the scene from Lois’s POV. Although, then it should probably be over yonder, no?
LOIS: Yeah, excessive vomiting has no place on these boards.
CAT: Isn’t that discrimination against expecting gossip columnists?
“I’ll call Chef Andre and have the staff deliver our dinner here. Anything for the future Mrs. Luthor.”
I hear sautéed heart of billionaire in a light bouillon is very recommended.
“About that, Lex,” she said, opening her hands and running them down the front of her slacks as she turned to face him. “I’m calling off the wedding.”
What?
How?
Impossible!
A startled expression came to his eyes as if she had started spouting Latin.
No, he’d have understood that.
“I cannot go forward, Lex,” Lois said, moving her hands behind her back, because frankly she was afraid what they were capable of if she kept them between her and Luthor.
Lois! Not on this side of the boards. And not after you’ve called of the wedding! That’s unseemly.
I did not see that one coming.
“But, darling, the wedding is tomorrow morning. We are expecting two hundred guests to the ceremony and three hundred more to the reception,” he said. “We can’t postpone now.”
I thought they had no need for a rehearsal?
Five hundred people and not one person I know.
Isn’t normally the ceremony larger than the reception?
He reached over and set his hand on her shoulder, causing her to stiffen. “Oh, darling,” he cooed with pity. “I’ll be there, the man who loves you more than life itself. Won’t that be enough?”
CLARK: Funny, I might have said the same thing once or twice…
“No,” Lois replied. “Weddings are supposed to be joyous occasions, celebrating one’s new beginning with family and friends.
Actually, according to Londo Mollari, that’s not what weddings are. Then again, he’s a Centauri and gotten three wives… Umm…I did once recommend Babylon 5 for your Netflix list, didn’t I?
Without anyone from my family there, what’s the point of throwing a party? We might as well have signed the register at City Hall.”
LEX: Are you saying that I could have had my way with you months for a token registration fee at City Hall instead of waiting until this whole affair has been set up? Do you have *any* idea what weddings cost?
It felt like hugging a crocodile.
LEX: Or a frozen fish.
“There, there, Lois,” he murmured into her ear as he patted her back.
![[Linked Image]](http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/eoOd9dKsqNo/hqdefault.jpg)
“I am dressed,” she insisted, holding out her arms so that he could see her slacks, blouse, and shoes.
“Of course you are, darling. I meant dressed properly for an evening out,” he corrected.
“I’ve known where your mother has been all along,” he admitted.
Brave. Stupid. But very brave.
“You’ve known, even though I’ve asked you and asked you and asked you if you knew where she was, and your answer always was that you couldn’t tell me?”
Oh look! He did not actually lie to her. From a lawyer’s point of view.
“After watching you and her at lunch that day, I realized that you had been enabling your mother in her addiction for years.
He does realize just how close he’s getting to receiving a knee-jerk reaction. Even if it would been belaying their honeymoon until he’s healed again.
If you hadn’t wanted her to drink at lunch, you would have done everything possible to make sure that alcohol wasn’t served.
Didn’t she mention no alcohol?
You are going to have to admit to the hard truth that you like that your mother is weak, because it makes you feel strong.
Look at that. He’s going to have her bawling into his shirt in no time. And then the shirt will be all stained and wet and he’ll have to remove it so she can wash it. And then…
Lois’s jaw dropped at the same time her fist landed squarely on his jaw, causing him to stumble backward a few steps.
Lois! Not on the eve of such an important photo-op!
Also…
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/k060.gif)
“Get out!” she screamed. “Get out of my apartment and my life!”
She appears to be ticked off…
“No,” he replied, stepping towards her so that he was only a foot away. “You will marry me and be my wife.”
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/k085.gif)
“No. It’s a statement of fact, Lois,” he replied, as he started to circle around her. “It’s the only way you’ll finally have the power you crave and have craved all of your life.”
He’s finally gone mad, is he?
“It’s why you are attracted to strong, powerful men, like myself and Superman, because you know that being with us, controlling us, makes you more powerful.”
Did he rehearse that first with Ari?
With me as your husband and the Daily Planet under your control, there would be…” His words emerged slowly in a whisper, “No… stopping… you.”
And what if the husband wouldn’t return from their honeymoon? What if he fell into a knife and then overboard?
Still… She couldn’t deny that there were some grains of truth to what he said, too.
Well…there’s got to be some truth to it for her to become the lady Boss of the underworld as she does in some stories. Well..bunnies, at least. Plus, there’s got to be a reason why Tempus is so sweet on her.
She opened the door and stared at the thin, stylishly dressed, white-haired woman on the other side.
Huh. Who’d have thunk.
LEX: What? Think I want them to reunion during the ceremony?
Lois shook herself out of her of shock. “Grand… Mother Arnold,” Lois said, stepping away from the door so her grandmother could enter.
What?
“And ‘could I please’ hold your hand to make sure you didn’t get cold feet or anything, until she arrived. I just knew what I would find. Don’t you worry. I’ll take care of everything, Lois. It’s what I do. Clean up your mother’s messes. Come along.”
So, does this mean that you’ve just retconned Season One Ellen?
As soon as her mother arrived, Superman could whisk the two of them away someplace where Lois could explain what was really going on with Lex.
Won’t that be scandal, Superman stealing the illustrious Lois Lane from her groom right at the altar?
That way, Lex would know that Lucy knew nothing about Lois’s plans.
And that would stop him from selling Lucy to the Russian mob as entertainment provider why…?
“I would love to meet her,” he replied. “Why don’t you ladies meet me at the Top of Tower for dinner?”
Lois covered the handset. “He wants us to meet him at the Top of the Tower for dinner.”
Isn’t that kind of how Lois got into the previous mess in the first place? A mother. A fiancé. A restaurant. Too much whine and wine?
We’re just going to eat at the Champagne Room at the Bristol, and then retire upstairs to her suite.”
“The Lexor’s Empire Steakhouse was voted best steak restaurant in the city by Metropolis Magazine.”
Is the MM owned by LexCorp by any chance?
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world, darling,” he replied as if making an appointment made to fill four cavities without painkillers.
Or maybe a root canal?
LOIS: I have just the right drill for it.
![[Linked Image]](http://www.110220volts.com/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/KD960KCGB.jpg)
“Don’t be silly, Lois,” her grandmother responded, but Lois could tell she was pleased as she smiled over at her. “Now, tell me all about your young man.”
LOIS: He’s a murdering thief and a natural born psychopathic sociopath who liked to sleep around.
Lois planned to tell Mother Arnold everything. She wanted her grandmother to know exactly what she was dealing with and why she hadn’t invited her to the wedding. Mother Arnold wasn’t a fool like her mother.
Oh boy.
“Um… he didn’t come home last night. I mean, Cat said he came home because his bed had been slept in, but he wasn’t here when I woke up, and I haven’t seen him all day,” Jimbo admitted.
“All day? Wait a minute, what was Cat doing there? No, wait. That doesn’t matter.”
Doesn’t matter? Was this the same woman who had obsessed over CK’s and Cat’s relationship all the previous summer? Well, according to Lucy, at least.
“You first. Why are you going through with it?” he said. No way that he would tell Lois about the Luthor investigation and up-coming warrants if she really was planning to be his Mrs.
PEERY:
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a050.gif)
Cat was investigating Lex’s sex life? No, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.”
“I’m sure most of it was from before you got engaged, Lois,” he said softly.
He’s sweet, isn’t he?
“Gotcha!” Jimbo said, jotting that down on the notepad next to CK’s bed.
“I’ve got to go. I’ve been in the ladies room much too long already. Good luck!” Lois said and hung up.
They were going to need it.
So… another 25 parts till Lois walks down the isle?
Michael
