Sue, as always, this was great. A drunken Lois... I felt so sorry for Lois in this episode. She was so convinced that Superman was immune to her existence.
Clark's elbow brushes against mine as he quietly says, "It's not so stupid, Lois. Did you ever think that maybe Superman was afraid to reveal himself? His true feelings?"
Superman is terrified to reveal himself to you Lois. He's afraid that you;ll reject him...again.
No, that's a lie. I've thought about it. I thought about it just yesterday when I was sitting at my desk and looked over in time to see Clark watching me. He does that a lot, but I pretend I don't notice. It's flattering, for one thing. Actually, it's beyond flattering. It's almost enough to make me wish I had one more shot at kissing him.
It's hard to describe the look that he gives me, when he's watching me. I've had my share of admirers and none of them have ever looked at me like Clark does. Other men have leered or undressed me with their eyes or simply looked away, embarrassed to be caught staring. Clark does none of those things.
You're not that drunk, Lois. Clark is just in love with you, that's all.
"What did you mean, when you said that Superman was afraid to reveal his true feelings?"
"What?" Clark tilts his head like he didn't understand the question.
"You said that maybe Superman was afraid to reveal his true feelings. Do you know how he feels about me?" I silently will him to just play along and tell me what I want to hear. Tell me that he's secretly confessed his love for me to you, Clark. Can't you say that? Even if it isn't true?
"I know he cares about you, Lois." He gives me a sympathetic smile.
I turn away from him, blinking furiously to keep the tears at bay. I wish I wasn't so maudlin when I'm tipsy. I slump heavily against the wall as my knees start to shake. Superman doesn't love me. He never will. He 'cares' about me. Big deal. He cares about everyone. I'm nothing special to him and I was stupid to think that I was.
"Lois?" Clark touches my shoulder and I shrug his hand away, wishing he wouldn't pity me and yet, it's all I have. A few torrid fantasies and a partner who's too nice to even try and lie to make me feel better. It's kind of freeing, in a way, to be so totally pathetic.
"I'm nothing to him." My words rise until they're practically a wail. "He just walked right past me, Clark, like I wasn't even there. I'm the invisible woman to him."
Clark's hand smoothes over my back as he leans down to whisper near my ear. "No, shh, Lois, that's not true."
"How would you know?" I swipe at the tears beneath my eyes with the back of my hand and push away from the wall. "Did he tell you that?"
"Actually... yes." He flinches as he answers and I wonder if he's breaking a confidence by telling me.
Little does Lois know that she's actually getting information from the horse's mouth. And because she's drunk, Clark seems to be a little more liberal regarding answers. I think the alcohol sort of softens the reactions that he expects to get from her.
"What's the secret, Clark? What are guys really looking for? I have an okay body, don't I?"
His hand tightens on my elbow and I wonder if he's about to burst out laughing. His voice is definitely a little strained as he says, "Lois, trust me, the problem isn't your body."
LOL! If only Lois knew what Clark thought of her body. I'll bet his voice was squeaking when he answered that one.
"You don't have to walk me to the door, you know. I only have half a flight left. I can make it on my own."
"Sorry," Clark says with a cheerful grin. "When I walk a girl home, she gets door to door service."
I roll my eyes and turn away from him. "You are so old-fashioned, Kent. I bet you bring your dates flowers, too, don't you?"
"Only when I'm trying to score points."
"Only when you're trying to score," I correct for him, looking over my shoulder to see if he blushes.
He gives me a wink that makes me blush instead. "That, too," he says lightly.
I love this Clark...the confident Clark who is in control.
Finally, Clark softly asks, "What do you think the real Superman is like?"
"Mmm." I close my eyes and try to picture him. Gentle. Sweet. Passionate. Hopelessly in love with me and afraid to admit it. Suddenly I visualize Superman sitting at Clark's desk, watching me like Clark does. That would be so amazing! What if Superman was like Clark? Right now that thought makes perfect sense to me. I giggle and look up at Clark through my eyelashes. "You," I say, before I can think better of it. "I bet Superman is a lot like you, just without the smart aleck tendencies."
Clark stands up straight and runs a hand through his hair. "I wish you were sober."
I laugh. "I don't! I hope I'm never sober again. It's going to hurt so much in the morning." Just like that, my good mood vanishes and I'm left with the same gut-wrenching grief as before. "I just wish..." I swallow back a sob and choke out the last few words. "I wish he would notice me."
Clark sighs and scratches the back of his head. "I... think you should call me when you wake up tomorrow."
"Why? Do you have a surefire hangover cure?"
"No." He shakes his head and smiles at me. "I just need you sober so we can talk."
Yep! SUperman is a lot like Clark.
Clark realizes that Lois feels more than friendship for him and it's enough for him to let her in. He also doesn't want to see her hurting anymore, thinking that Superman doesn't care about her. He wants Lois to know that she is very much loved and noticed by Superman.
My eyes fly open and I stare at ceiling as it shifts above me.
What if...?
No. I couldn't possibly be that lucky. I'm just drunk.
Yup Lois, you've got it!
Nice story Sue. You are just so good at this.
~Sheila
