Darth Michael: 
FDK!
I'm sure there are still people out there reading, besides you.
With the board shut down, the auctions, Easter, etc., people have been busy.
/nods/ Very busy with auction and reporting board issues. Will see what tomorrow brings. Plus, Thursday is a holiday over here, so...
My... it sure took a long time to get to Thursday. (I'm hoping that you were distracted by writing your story and Betaing Sue's story. If not, just cross your fingers and lie by saying you were. I'll believe you.)
Two Weeks Later...So, now for the catching up part… Or is it catching up on parts?
Plural. I see the 10 Quote limit has also gone out the window.
Working as male-order prostitutes?
JIMBO: Um... Okay. Female clients only, please.
She’s better in the sack than her previous boyfriends gave her credit for?
That's the rumor. Sadly, the only one who might know the truth recalls the event as total fantasy.
LOIS: Well, that proves I'm better, doesn't it?
Pizza delivery? And he hoped to score with the recipient since Clark had told him to give Lois his best?
Nope. Since this is still the night of Cat's wedding, Lois is working her... cough... kinks out at the gym.
So, red cape and blue…suit?
Lois in a hot pink dress, being carried by a man in blue suit and red cape. /also, if the blue and red blurred/blended wouldn't it make purple/
JACK: Ultra Woman!
But him holding Lois is quite fun, too.
CLARK: So much fun!
So much so, he might not let her go.
Oooh! Is this reason why small children are taken to the mall to visit Santa?
My experience shows that it's a good way to scare them into behaving, because Santa is SCARY (due to all the power he holds).
He has to keep his dalliances quiet. Lois owns a watch and knows how to use it.
Um... she left the watch at her dojo.
What did he do to his skank of the ball back there? And will she be alive come the morrow?
He brought her back to his place to shower and change into a different disguise. No time for more.
CLARK: Phew.
LOIS:
No, it meant that she knew he had caught 8 women in his web.
Well, let's see. There's Lois, Lola, Minnie, Wanda, Cat, Lucy, Toni and Toni?
Yep.
CLARK: How do these rumors get started?
I just realized something! He’s a Mormon adhering to the traditional practices! Either that, or he’s a Kryptonian Lord, having purchased several concubines.
LOLA: /mad/ *Purchased*?
CHING: Exactly. They were given to his lordship for free.
LEX: I like this society. Mrs. Cox, draft a memo!
Drunk on love. And some cheap booze Ralph left over at the wedding?
More the former than the latter. If Cat didn't invite anyone from work except Clark, it's doubtful that Ralph got an invite.
He’s very experienced with the volatile sex?
He's still learning.
So, LNN got good AV software?
It was outsourced to LexLabs computer division. They do.
You said that you’d take care of it,”
Apparently, he did.
That's not what she meant.
ROBERTSON: I have not worked Mondays to Thursday all the way till lunch to have you turn LNN into a joke! If you want to sully Superman’s reputation, do it in a clever way. A way that doesn’t look like we’re reprinting the Pravda!
There must be something to LNN if it survived Lex's downfall.
Or goes on maternity leave. Whichever comes first.
LOIS: I'm not pregnant!
LEX: Give me time.
CLARK: So, not happening.
That was if he factored out the time lost waking up in a cold sweat from Lois and Lex nightmares.
Hmm…I think he’s not really understood the concept of a ‘wet dream’, has he?
He doesn't really find Lois and Lex together exciting in that way.
Prof. Daitch?
LOIS: Close enough, so long as it gets my snugglebums out of the spotlight.
Um... the person who created the virus.
So, lots of businesses are ‘buying insurance’ and then they just go away again. But of course, Lex still needs to drain the funds back out of the insurance business?
Hence when companies go "boom".
“You mean, like cooking the books?”
No wonder Lois hasn’t found a thing.
LOIS:
Is that a cooking joke?
And a good one!
where did this money come from?”
Business ‘buying insurance’…
I believe the implication was that Lexel Insurance was paying out more to LexCorp/Lex Luthor than it was receiving in.
They could have Clark put Lex down Kryptonian style.
SUPERMAN: Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock?
LOIS: Now, where did all my fancy underwear go…
CLARK: Underwear?
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a050.gif)
I knew I forgot something.
Awww…look! He’s gotten a poor man’s Creepy Bunker Apartment™ set up!
CLARK: Nope. Just a short visit to Kansas before hitting the open road.
LOIS: AIR. He meant 'air', right? This isn't going to be a road trip is it?
Maybe he doesn’t want to know? Or, maybe, he already put up cameras, figured out just what a skank he’s about to get into, and then had the indoor equipment set up so the marriage would still go through since that’s the only way Betsy is going to allow him to have some fun with his soon be dearly departed soon to be new wife?
Maybe.
For breaking and entering Lois’s apartment?
HENDERSON: That's about it.
Well, even if he said he just decided to pocket the money, all they’d have him for would be him being a scuzzball.
Being that the money was to rebuild the DP, wouldn't that count as insurance fraud?
Well…if you look at the history books, a lot of women have said ‘yes’ to scuzzballs for quite less money.
RALPH: One just said ‘yes’ to me for a nifty 50 bucks the other night!
HOOKER: And regretted it.
Wouldn’t she need to die during the process to achieve martyrdom?
LOIS: Hello! Not going to want to live after Lex, so…
CLARK: /cat/
Some people say surviving torture is worse than dying.
Aww…Clark!
CLARK: What? At least she’d go out happy!
LOIS: 30 Seconds! That's all I...?
Funny thing. Did you watch the NCIS episode with Tony as a hobo two weeks ago?
Unfortunately, not. I don't get live TV anymore. I'm about 5 years behind on my NCIS.
Good thing Lois got a stronger bladder?
CLARK: It’s why I always carry Ralph or other crooks away from my body.
Superman has NEVER carried Ralph.
Truffles, caviar, quail eggs, and Champagne?
SUPERMAN's FOUNDATION, not Lex's. Milk, eggs, flour, meat, etc.
SEWER LEX: I shall venture to eat at the Fifths more often.
By that time, doesn't Bobby have a paying gig again?
That’s how he justifies that he almost *didn’t* help? What is he, a cop worried about due process and lawfully obtained evidence?
BATMAN: /can't believe his bat-ears/
Touche!
The boss thinks it’s the best way to teach Chen his lesson,
Since Clark thought ‘The Boss’ was a name a couple of paragraphs up, wouldn’t it be capitalized here, too?
Possibly. It could also be that until he has prove that their boss is THE Boss, he keeps it lowercase in his mind?
So, this is like a time traveling douche robbing the gunshop were he first asked to try out the gun being sold.
Not that smart. He just wants to swipe some hair gel at the same time.
And he wants to look like a city douche bag instead?
SUPERMAN: Hey! I wear hair gel.
BATMAN: Case and point.
I thought that was a paternal trait?
DOUCHE BAG #1: And you think our mother didn’t do *two* douche bags in a row?
Let's just assume the Black brothers have the same father.
Without the spikes, I can’t strike fear into our customers.”
ER: /suggests Darth Maul a good example/
PETE BLACK: See!
So, Douche #1 is saying that he’s not into putting pointy objects into chicks, only dudes?
Different circumstances. Different pointy objects.
Huh, why do I have the feeling that they’re talking about roughing up, and in case of Douche #1, then having carnal knowledge of that buff homeless dude that’s following them. And have they not watched *any* TV show, where the crazed serial killers often go after their lowlife victims dressed as homeless dudes?
CLARK: Now, that would be just plain stupid in this case.
Thanks for the funny FDK!
