30. When you're called to the morgue to identify your girlfriend's body, insist on a DNA test. It might be someone else, surgically altered to look like her.

PJ

"You told me you weren't like other men," she said, shaking her head at him when the storm of laughter had passed.
He grinned at her - a goofy, Clark Kent kind of a grin. "I have a gift for understatement."
"You can say that again," she told him.
"I have a...."
"Oh, shut up."

--Stardust, Caroline K