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MUSE: <cracks whip> Back to work, slave!
ME: Yes, ma'am. Right away.
Now now, you must really talk to your muse. That’s no way to treat a writer. You have to give them treats, proper exercise, and play with them a bit.

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LEX: Caligula you say? <thinks about it, takes it one step further, uses all Lois clones>
[Linked Image]

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NOR: Ooooh! Thank you for consolidating my new planet for me. You may leave now through the sewage exit.


LEX: <produces hunk of Kryptonite>
NOR: [Linked Image] Can I get some help here, please?
JEN MAI: Hmm…One red sun. Two red suns. Three red suns. Okay, he’s out. Minions, please blast that man with the green rock from a safe distance. But try not to destroy his palace. I think I might like it for my throne room.

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Definitely. It's less fun to him if he doesn't do it himself.
Then why is he seeking female companionship? It’s not like he talks to his girlfriends.

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LEX: All my lovers have certainly thought so.
RANDOM EXPENSIVE CALLGIRL: It’s all part of the Superman’s girlfriend experience his money bought.

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And puppies to housebreak.
True.
LOIS: cat

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I know! It's almost like he's a super villain or something!
LEX: But I even *pay* my *taxes*! I mean, there’s that 100 million loss when I outsourced production of the coffee cups from LexBucks to LexPaper and not to mention…Oh look, the government actually owes me negative taxes for all the incurred losses.

wave Michael

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I go by Michael on the Archives.