Oh, I'm sure they won't mind. If they do, it will be a very short relationship.
Actually, I know our daughter shares our values, and I'm relatively sure that her friend does, too, but, as Terry said, I think it would be helpful to make our expectations clear. I'm thinking that Dad should talk to boyfriend in a similar way as he would talk to our own son about how a gentleman treats a lady. And, yes, I've been talking to my girls (and boys) for years about the level of respect that girls deserve from their boyfriends. I think having Dad talk with boyfriend also sends the message that our daughter has 'backup' as it were. I think it helps if both parties in the relationship know that she is valued by her family. It's also a bit of a test of his intentions. If he can't be bothered to talk with her dad, then he can't be that serious about treating her well.
I will say that he did well for their first 'date.' He invited her to a college football game with his family. The two of them had seats seperate from the others, but when it started pouring rain at halftime, they all adjurned to his uncle's nearby office rec room to watch the second half indoors. His parents, sister, aunt and uncle were all there, and they made sure she called us to tell us about the change of venue and make sure it was alright with us. Then last weekend was a school square dance. He needs planning lessons, though; they arrived seperately and he was a little late, so she already had a different partner by the time he got there. Then he remarks at the break "I wish they'd let us pick our own partners. I don't like just being assigned." To which she replies, "Well, I got here on time and I did get to pick." Oops!
I told her she should tell him that if he wants to be sure to dance with her, then next time they should arrive together. So much to learn.
Terry, have you talked just to your daughters, or also to their beaux? The kid's only 15, and we don't want to terrify him, but I do think that, as you say, we should make our expectations clear.
