|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Ooh, good chapter! You're really upping the ante already. It's interesting that you don't have a chapter count on your posts. That might mean that you don't know how long it will be, or that you want to torture us with multiple false dramatic climaxes. And I know you have that in you. Mayson's already coming apart at the seams. Of course, some of it is due to her car being exploded ("Lois! You esploded them!"), some due to the missing evidence, and some due to the stress in her personal life. Now the one person with whom she'd really like to spend some up close and personal time is at her front door, along with the person who is driving bamboo shards under her heart's fingernails. I'm waiting to see if Mayson breaks down and shares her loss of evidence with L&C, and if she does, if Clark the Boy Scout will tell her that they found it and took it to STAR Labs for analysis. Wouldn't that be explosive? "You stole my evidence!" "It was lying under a burned-out car on the impound lot!" "It's evidence in a very important investigation!" "Yeah, we're making progress on it too!" "It's an active police matter!" "It doesn't matter because we have the evidence!" Then fists and feet fly and Clark has to play peacemaker. Not unlike mediating between Israel and Palestine. And so on and so forth. Of course, if this is a longer tale, it's too early to let everyone in on such secrets. Lois knows that Mayson cares deeply for Clark, but I don't think Lois understands how deeply Mayson wishes Lois would take a long walk off a short pier in the middle of Great White dinner buffet. (I'm pretty sure Clark doesn't know either.) And, of course, which woman will discover Clark's "other job" first? And what will she do with it? I foresee anger, distrust, tears, threats, possible hand-to-hand combat, and a helpless Superman. Oh, I just had an evil thought. What if the women find out at the same time and form an alliance to torture Clark? And they independently decide that it would be a great chance to get the inside track with Clark? Shoot, Superman might leave Earth, much less Metropolis. He might send a mental message to Ching and Zara to please come take him away from this crazy place! Don't wait so long to post the next chapter. My heart might not be able to take it.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Hey E! “Anyone in particular?” Kent asked, crossing his arms over his chest with a stoic expression that made Ryan think twice before responding. Careful Clark, your Spandex is showing He does tend to forget himself when his emotions get the better of him, doesn't he? She set the pen down and rummaged through her bag, searching for the missing capsule. It had been right here… So... are there two cylinders and one's currently in the wind, or just the one and Mayson missed when she carelessly tossed it into her purse? The two cylinders are one and the same. More to come on this in the next few chapters. ...and the blatant way Mayson threw herself at Clark. At the time, Lois wasn’t sure why it bothered her... Lois (and probably Clark) was the only person in Metropolis who didn't know why that bothered her <snork> She felt her heart lurch in her chest when she found herself staring back at the reason for her torturous evening and painful memories. Her obsessive psychosis knocked on her office door? Thanks for another excellent chapter! Thanks for reading and commenting E!
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Ooh, good chapter! You're really upping the ante already. Hey Terry, Thanks for reading! It's interesting that you don't have a chapter count on your posts. That might mean that you don't know how long it will be, or that you want to torture us with multiple false dramatic climaxes. And I know you have that in you. So, I'm keeping the chapter count in my back pocket to build up the suspense. I'll let you know when you're at the end though Mayson's already coming apart at the seams. Of course, some of it is due to her car being exploded ("Lois! You esploded them!"), some due to the missing evidence, and some due to the stress in her personal life. Now the one person with whom she'd really like to spend some up close and personal time is at her front door, along with the person who is driving bamboo shards under her heart's fingernails. I'm waiting to see if Mayson breaks down and shares her loss of evidence with L&C, and if she does, if Clark the Boy Scout will tell her that they found it and took it to STAR Labs for analysis. Hehe, you have a very active imagination Terry, but I'm not quite ready to let these three have the big confrontation just yet. Lois knows that Mayson cares deeply for Clark, but I don't think Lois understands how deeply Mayson wishes Lois would take a long walk off a short pier in the middle of Great White dinner buffet. (I'm pretty sure Clark doesn't know either.) There is definitely no knowledge of just how bitter Mayson is just yet but it'll come to light...eventually. And, of course, which woman will discover Clark's "other job" first? And what will she do with it? I foresee anger, distrust, tears, threats, possible hand-to-hand combat, and a helpless Superman. Again with that active imagination. What will we do with such thoughts? Hmmm, let them simmer and see if anything sticks... Oh, I just had an evil thought. evil What if the women find out at the same time and form an alliance to torture Clark? And they independently decide that it would be a great chance to get the inside track with Clark? <snork> I had an even more evil thought but I won't bore you with the details. Don't wait so long to post the next chapter. My heart might not be able to take it. Sorry for taking so long to respond. It's been a brutal week with the kiddos and the lovely colds being passed with back to school. Next chapter will be up on Sunday.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Unburying from the massive posts. Chapter 3 is up. Thanks for reading.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Chapter 4 is up now. Next chapter will be up on Sunday
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 384 Likes: 1
Beat Reporter
|
Beat Reporter
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 384 Likes: 1 |
I'm dying to know who sent that pic to Lois, Mayson doesn't seem far enough around the bend yet not to realize how deeply creepy it is, and the envelope didn't have enough spit stains for something that she had to write Lois's name on. Mayson, scribbling with the tip of her tongue caught between her teeth: To Lois *ptoo ptoo ptoo!* Lane *ptoo ptoo ptoo!*Lois: Why is this envelope dripping?? I'm thinking someone in the DA's office is either trying to warn Lois or undermine Mayson's credibility, possibly both. Also, I can't believe Clark sprinkled himself with cat hair. That has got to be harder and more complicated than fessing up. He needs to be careful, that's not a spur of the moment 'blurted something out because I was in a hurry' lie, that's the kind of calculated thought-out thing that's more likely to have Lois hunting up a shard of Kryptonite later. I'm really enjoying Lois and Clark's leisurely waltz toward open romance and Mayson's accelerating slide into a bin of bulk nuts, thanks for the chapter!
"HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE." -Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Oh, the intensity. Oh, the angst. Oh, the coming blame game.
Mayson will surely blame Lois for whatever happened to Gomez, Lois will accuse Mayson of negligence, and Clark will have to play referee again. Who whacked Gomez, assuming he's actually dead? Or did someone slip him a Resurrection pill? When will Clark and Lois get the analysis back from STAR Labs? Is Mayson about to go postal on them? Like Endelda, I wonder who sent Lois that doctored photo. Was it a threat or a warning?
Excellent story! Looking for chapter 5 now!
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
I'm dying to know who sent that pic to Lois, Mayson doesn't seem far enough around the bend yet not to realize how deeply creepy it is, and the envelope didn't have enough spit stains for something that she had to write Lois's name on. All I can say about it is more information will come to light in the next few chapters. You'll see two/three different POVs on critical events that will help explain some of your questions. Mayson, scribbling with the tip of her tongue caught between her teeth: To Lois *ptoo ptoo ptoo!* Lane *ptoo ptoo ptoo!* Lois: Why is this envelope dripping?? I'm thinking someone in the DA's office is either trying to warn Lois or undermine Mayson's credibility, possibly both. Also, I can't believe Clark sprinkled himself with cat hair. That has got to be harder and more complicated than fessing up. He needs to be careful, that's not a spur of the moment 'blurted something out because I was in a hurry' lie, that's the kind of calculated thought-out thing that's more likely to have Lois hunting up a shard of Kryptonite later. He knew he was in the dog house the second the lie came out of his mouth. Risk being even deeper in trouble when Lois was already suspicious or continue the lie. These fables will catch up with him eventually but for now it's kinda hilarious to put him in awkward positions like this. I'm really enjoying Lois and Clark's leisurely waltz toward open romance and Mayson's accelerating slide into a bin of bulk nuts, thanks for the chapter! Thanks for reading and commenting, E. I enjoy hearing about everyone's theories of what will happen next.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Oh, the intensity. Oh, the angst. Oh, the coming blame game. Oh, Terry, you don't know the half of it //rubs hands together and laughs maniacally//Mayson will surely blame Lois for whatever happened to Gomez, Lois will accuse Mayson of negligence, and Clark will have to play referee again. These plot guesses are pretty funny. Though not that far off Who whacked Gomez, assuming he's actually dead? Or did someone slip him a Resurrection pill? More to come on Gomez in the next chapter. When will Clark and Lois get the analysis back from STAR Labs? Well, it will take more than a few hours.... Soon! That's all I'm willing to say at this point. Is Mayson about to go postal on them? Define, "postal"? I mean, if do you mean permanent resident at Arkham or do you mean I will story-block you from everyone in this town? Like Endelda, I wonder who sent Lois that doctored photo. Was it a threat or a warning? So, that one will have more explanation on the subsequent chapters. Excellent story! Looking for chapter 5 now! Thanks, Terry! I'll have Chapter 5 up on Sunday CDT.
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Ooh, another chapter! Sweet! I'm glad Clark has his parents. “Just be honest with her,” his mom added. That's excellent advice, Martha. “You two go head to head with a lot bigger issues on almost a weekly basis. I’m sure you can figure out how to talk to one another.” Um - that's not such good advice. To Lois, the perception that Clark has been lying to her for so long will be the biggest issue in her mind. She's not going to listen to facts, reason, or clear explanations at that point. It will not be the tip of the iceberg, nor the part under the water - it will be the entire ice mass! Unless the revelation comes at or after a psyche-shaking event for Lois where her emotional energy is already spent, she's going to explode. The reason she didn't in the show is because when Clark came clean, she already knew. And she'd already worked through much of the emotional fallout after being thawed out when Clark wasn't in the same room with her. She just didn't realize that when she said "not now" to his proposal he'd hear "no" and nothing more. I can see something similar happening here. Mayson is definitely about to slide off the rails. I don't now how much longer it will be until her antipathy toward Lois - which now includes Clark - affects her professional judgement and damages her effectiveness as a prosecutor. She's going to morph from a crusader for justice to a vengeful harpy, screaming her pain out before the world and reaching to rend anyone and anything she thinks has injured her. Lois is in trouble and doesn't know it yet. The little bad guys tidbit was great. You hinted that Gomez got the pill without actually saying so. You also told us that McCarthy's pride has been dented, so Mayson is still in his bull's-eye. And Albie is still a whiny little lizard. But what dose for Gables was he talking about? Is it possible that Gables is an addict of some kind? That he's not really in control of this operation, as he obviously believes he is? More, please. I'd like some more, ma'am. As soon as possible.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,763 Likes: 18
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,763 Likes: 18 |
The city of Metropolis had a different look and feel in the evening Spring air as Lois Lane walked a few steps ahead of her partner Clark Kent. Her mind was still reeling from the events of the day. Her heightened emotions after the close call at Lucky Leon's warehouse with the nuclear warhead kept her mind swimming as she reflected on the last twenty-four hours. Looking forward to reading this tonight! Sorry I have been MIA lately. Worked all weekend. Totally exhausted. Promise to write comments!
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Ooh, another chapter! Sweet! Hey Terry! I'm glad Clark has his parents. “Just be honest with her,” his mom added. That's excellent advice, Martha. Taking the advice will be a whole different challenge. He'll get the hint eventually. “You two go head to head with a lot bigger issues on almost a weekly basis. I’m sure you can figure out how to talk to one another.” Um - that's not such good advice. To Lois, the perception that Clark has been lying to her for so long will be the biggest issue in her mind. She's not going to listen to facts, reason, or clear explanations at that point. It will not be the tip of the iceberg, nor the part under the water - it will be the entire ice mass!Terry, you're absolutely right. Fireworks will occur if the revelation were to come without extenuating circumstances or if Clark found just the right way to make the reveal and apologize, provide reveal and an explanation on the why before getting to the whole 'I've been lying to you for years haha... Please don't kill me' bit. Unless the revelation comes at or after a psyche-shaking event for Lois where her emotional energy is already spent, she's going to explode. The reason she didn't in the show is because when Clark came clean, she already knew. And she'd already worked through much of the emotional fallout after being thawed out when Clark wasn't in the same room with her. Very good observations, Terry. I don't think Clark would have faired very well if he'd been in the room with Lois when the pieces fit together. She just didn't realize that when she said "not now" to his proposal he'd hear "no" and nothing more. Well no one is perfect. I can see something similar happening here. There are similarities between fic and cannon I've tried to subtly sprinkle in. Glad you're able to pick up on them. Mayson is definitely about to slide off the rails. I was hoping it would be obvious how unstable Mayson was becoming. Her perception is now being clouded. As you saw in this past chapter her version of events versus Lois and Clark's are fragmented now. This will be very important to pay attention to throughout the remainder of the fic. I don't now how much longer it will be until her antipathy toward Lois - which now includes Clark - affects her professional judgement and damages her effectiveness as a prosecutor. She's going to morph from a crusader for justice to a vengeful harpy, screaming her pain out before the world and reaching to rend anyone and anything she thinks has injured her. It won't be all at once but you'll see the subtle changes throughout the fic. Lois is in trouble and doesn't know it yet. Yes, Lois is in a lot of trouble with Mayson. Luckily she keeps those super-body guards nearby for backup. The little bad guys tidbit was great. You hinted that Gomez got the pill without actually saying so. You also told us that McCarthy's pride has been dented, so Mayson is still in his bull's-eye. And Albie is still a whiny little lizard. But what dose for Gables was he talking about? Is it possible that Gables is an addict of some kind? That he's not really in control of this operation, as he obviously believes he is? I'm not revealing too much as a lot of the action will be happening in Chapter 7 with the bad guys. You will see more of McCarthy and everyone's favorite DEA agent over the next few chapters. The dose is the medication Gables has to take for his condition. Chapter 6 is now up and I even included a little waffiness for those WAFF lovers out there.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
The city of Metropolis had a different look and feel in the evening Spring air as Lois Lane walked a few steps ahead of her partner Clark Kent. Her mind was still reeling from the events of the day. Her heightened emotions after the close call at Lucky Leon's warehouse with the nuclear warhead kept her mind swimming as she reflected on the last twenty-four hours. Looking forward to reading this tonight! Sorry I have been MIA lately. Worked all weekend. Totally exhausted. Promise to write comments! Hey Morgana Sorry, you had a rough weekend. I've had a few of my own the last few weeks. Hope you enjoy the catch up reading session.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
PSA: Chapter 6 is up. Chapter 7 will be posted AFTER the boards update. Barring any issuesAll comments welcome. Let me know what you think.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
I know. I know. It's been a while since the last posting. I honestly wasn't sure if anyone was still reading it or not and was contemplating just archiving it given how slow the boards had been lately. BUT before giving up I figured I'd wait out the update and see if the next chapter had better luck. I'm guessing it had too much WAFF? Anyway, Chapter 7 is up.
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,051 Likes: 20
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,051 Likes: 20 |
Finally got the time to read this last chapter! Man, you really keep the tension up! Hrm, I don't suppose there's any chance that Mayson will fall in love with Dan and forget all about Clark and Lois, is there?
~•~
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,763 Likes: 18
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,763 Likes: 18 |
Yay! Happy to see the update! I want to comment now that I have a weekend free!
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
|
OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Finally got the time to read this last chapter! Man, you really keep the tension up! Hrm, I don't suppose there's any chance that Mayson will fall in love with Dan and forget all about Clark and Lois, is there? Hey Queenie! Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad you liked the latest chapter. Tension will be pretty constant throughout this one. Um, Dan will come into play but probably not in the way you're thinking. Yay! Happy to see the update! I want to comment now that I have a weekend free! Hey Morgana! Hope you enjoy your free weekend! Looking forward to hearing what you think so far. Okay, Chapter 8 is now up. Enjoy and as always, all comments are welcome.
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 152
Hack from Nowheresville
|
Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 152 |
I love this story. I am a loyal follower of your work. Shame on me. I lurk.
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
This is getting scary.
I checked the end of 7 to see when Mayson caught the bullet in her knee (hmm, that sounds familiar somehow), and there's no real indication that she'd been hit. But it's perfectly reasonable to go from her apartment being sprayed with bullets to Daniel S. putting a pressure bandage on her knee. And she's really starting to lose contact with reality. "No, Superman, you can't fly me to the emergency room." "No, Lane, I don't want to work with you, despite your giving me a great lead." "No, I'm not going to pursue this evidence that I've been horrified was lost somehow." Even Scardino can see she's coming unwound.
Speaking of Dan-call-me-Daniel, he's not awed by Superman in the least. Interesting. Does that mean that he doesn't know that much about him, was totally distracted at the time, or knows a lot more than anyone else in this twisted tale? I noticed that Dan didn't consider Superman when he was mentally recounting his day among the crazy women of Metropolis.
Someone broke into Lois' closet and shredded all her semi-formal and formal clothing? That sounds like the work of a jealous woman to me - and one who's not totally sane. A man might attack her clothing, but he surely would widen his swath of shredding to include her underwear, assuming that wouldn't be his primary focus. Is it possible that Mayson is Lois' nemesis, that she's trying to sabotage Lois' relationship with Clark? These actions would fit the worldview of a woman with only forty-seven cards in her solitaire deck.
Clark needs to reveal himself to Lois now, like in the next 24 hours. Let her work through her shock and fury while he's protecting her. Let her see just how much he cares for her and what he'll sacrifice for her. Let her realize that he kept this knowledge from her for two reasons - first, to protect himself, and second, to protect her. As endangered a species as Lois Lane seems to be in this tale, how many more knives would be pointed a her if it got out that she knew Superman's secret?
More tension than a reader can handle! Please resolve this soon!
Unless, of course, you don't. I bet if we looked closely, this level of torture would be banned by international treaty.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
|
|
|
|