Will Clark be more horrified at what had happened or heartbroken that she hadn't told him?
I hope that Clark won't be too horrified at Lois. I, too, was at the edge of my seat, just waiting for Lois to tell Clark what had happened. And I was so disappointed that she didn't. But, since I'm the resident Lois-defender on these boards, I'll try to offer what I think is Lois's point of view of what had happened, and how that affected her relationship with Clark.
She tugged on her hand, trying to pull it from his grasp but instead he came with it. He was on top of her, arms on either side trapping her between them, the full weight of his body on hers, his lips on her neck and shoulder again.
This was Clark, she told herself again. He'd never hurt her.
She made herself take deep breaths and tried desperately to avoid a panic attack.
Suddenly, his arms gave out and she was pushed further into the mattress.
"Clark, please." It was all she could do to get the words out.
A soft snore was her only answer.
She tried to breathe a sigh of relief, but he was really heavy and she couldn't get enough air in.
Me the claustrophobiac can so totally empathize with Lois's near panic here. Clark traps her, and even when he stops trying to - well, whatever he is trying to do - even then he traps her and suffocates her. As a claustrophobiac, I can totally understand Lois's panic. And I know that that fear doesn't just go away.
After Lois was almost raped by Paul, Clark became Lois's anchor in the storm. He was her protector, the man who kept her safe. And yet on that night he trapped her, almost like Paul had trapped her, and-- and---
What was Lois supposed to tell Clark in the morning? (Or later on during that day, perhaps?) Should she say, 'Hey Clark, you nearly raped me last night'? How would he react if she did? What would happen when she looked into his eyes and accused him of almost raping her? Could she trust him to react in a good way?
Could she trust him? After what had happened?
This is what I think that Clark's 'sexual initiative' that night did to Lois. She had learnt to trust him almost completely. He had always been so good to her, so patient, so loving. He held her at night. He kept her safe from her nightmares. He protected her from would-be rapists. But what happened when he turned out to be almost like a would-be rapist himself? When he wanted to make her have sex with him, not because both of them wanted it, and certainly not because
she wanted it, but because
he wanted it? What then? Could she trust him then? Could she confide in him after that?
I quite agree with what Elisabeth said in the previous FDK thread. Clark was so exhausted, and possibly also hungry and angry, and possibly heartbroken because of all the people he hadn't managed to save, that he literally wasn't in control of himself. He had pushed himself beyond his own limits. Well, I think that is something that Clark has to learn: he mustn't push himself so far that he can't control himself any longer. It is not at all strange that he doesn't know his limits yet, because he isn't Superman yet, and he has helped out at disaster sites so rarely. He hasn't learnt how to pace himself yet. He wasn't resposible for what happened.
Okay, fine: but what Lois saw was that he tried to force her to have sex. Because
he wanted to. Even though she didn't.
I think Lois had begun to think that Clark would
never do something like that to her. But now he did it after all. And Lois froze. And she clammed up. She couldn't talk to him any more.
Well, all I can say is that I hope that Clark understands Lois. And I hope that Lois understands Clark. And I hope they will start the slow process of helping Lois to trust Clark again. And then I hope they will both be ready to love.
Ann
