well, i was going to write a short post about how i've been enjoying this story, but how this part was especially good and such...

now i see you're worried about the fight.

don't be.

it works really well. i don't remember the original version well enough to see what you've changed, but i can say that the whole thing flowed together very naturally. from superman's sudden appearance to her obsessing to clark's frustration to her introspection to his... just perfect. it all hangs together, each line, each transition rising exactly as it should from what came before.

loved the introspection on both their parts. i'm glad lois could see the problem even without knowing ck=sm.

still, poor lois, thinking she'd managed to drive clark away. poor clark thinking lois just wants a friend. and, at the end, they're both so tired...

out of this whole part, there are only two things i have to complain about. first, there are a couple of extra hard returns. second, you used starbucks. how could you? overpriced midling-quality coffee aside, they're ubiquitous dens of yuppie evilness... [Linked Image]

well, second most evil corperation in the country aside, i'm still enjoying the story. laugh looking forward to part 7.

Paul

When in doubt, think about penguins. It probably won't help, but at least it'll be fun.