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Comments: Experience, part 1 #6348 09/15/03 07:14 AM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,644 North Carolina, USA ChiefPam OP Pulitzer
OP ChiefPam Pulitzer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,644 North Carolina, USA	Hey, jkd, welcome to the boards and congratulations on posting your first story part! Sometimes that's the hardest thing to do. This looks like a fun little fic. You're right, there are a number of grammar errors, but a good beta reader could help you straighten those out. You may want to post something to the "Fanfic Related" section, asking for someone to help you with this. If you have an idea of how long this might get and where you want to take the story, that'd probably help you get the person who can help you the most. Story-wise, it's a bit early to tell what you're doing with this, but there are lots of possibilities about Lois & Clark meeting as teenagers. The word-picture you drew of Lois's home life was very poignant. And the idea that she was so deep in thought she didn't realize she was staring at naked people was pretty funny Keep working on this one! It's got potential. PJ "You told me you weren't like other men," she said, shaking her head at him when the storm of laughter had passed. He grinned at her - a goofy, Clark Kent kind of a grin. "I have a gift for understatement." "You can say that again," she told him. "I have a...." "Oh, shut up." --Stardust, Caroline K

Re: Comments: Experience, part 1 #6349 09/15/03 09:53 AM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,846 Puerto Rico mariadferdez. Pulitzer
mariadferdez. Pulitzer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,846 Puerto Rico	Hi, Cute start. Maria D. Ferdez. --- Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age. MAF

Re: Comments: Experience, part 1 #6350 09/15/03 06:54 PM
Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 28 Singapore just_keep_drowning Blogger
just_keep_drowning Blogger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 28 Singapore	Thanks Quote Jimmy and Jack suppose to be more younger than Clark. yep, i know, maybe i shall change their names? I just decided to throw some names, could not think any up Anyone have any ideas on how it could be continued? I am alittle stuck....

Re: Comments: Experience, part 1 #6351 09/15/03 11:14 PM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 9,362 Scotland LabRat Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
LabRat Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 9,362 Scotland	Quote Anyone have any ideas on how it could be continued? I am alittle stuck.... Aha - what you need, jkd, is a beta reader. Someone who will work on the story with you bit by bit, bounce around a few ideas, brainstorm out any plot glitches, listen to your suggestions...and make a few of their own... Luckily, you've come to the right place. <g> If you post an ad for a beta in Fanfic Related I'm sure you won't have any trouble getting a volunteer or two. On the story: This is an interesting start and I'll look forward to seeing where you eventually take this one from here. Whatever you do with it - just keep on writing and having fun with it. LabRat Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly. Aramis: Yes, sorry. Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal. The Musketeers

Re: Comments: Experience, part 1 #6352 09/16/03 01:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,217 Exiled to Mare Nostrum coast daneel Kerth
daneel Kerth Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,217 Exiled to Mare Nostrum coast	Lana and Lois friends? However, interesting premise Jose "Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way." Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial A Bad Week in the Wizengamot

Re: Comments: Experience, part 1 #6353 09/17/03 01:49 PM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 767 usa merry Features Writer
merry Features Writer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 767 usa	just keep drowning good start I'm looking forward to see where you take us keep writing merry

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