Well done, Lynn.
I think the danger in writing a story so intensely personal is that it will read like a diary entry rather than a work of fiction. (Which is not necessarily a bad thing, if that's what you're trying to do.) You hit the balance really well - in my opinion, there's enough of you in there to give the story real feeling, but not so much of you that we couldn't easily identify with Lois and Clark.
It's also hard to write about something when you have so much information - the temptation is to push everything in 'because it's important', but failing to realise it might not be important to the story. I think you got that balance right, too.
Good job!
Corrina.
