I have very little time for feedback now, but I want to say that it's great to have you back with this.

I'll just quote a few little things:

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I may be scattered, a little shattered
What does it matter?
No one has a fit like I do
— “Disenchanted Lullaby,” Foo Fighters
As an image and a summary of Mayson, this is incredibly poignant. Due to her injuries she has certainly been a little scatter(brained), and physically (and emotionally), she is more than a little shattered. And what does it matter? Who really cares about Mayson?

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Mayson bristled. “Look — ” She paused, letting Scardino’s words sink in. You'd be dead. A chill ran down the length of her spine. Her stomach clenched.

“You’re — ” Ridiculous. Overreacting. Wrong. “ ... right.” The words reverberated hollowly in her ears.
This is as chillingly horrible as it is brilliantly written.

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“So what kind of cop wears Hawaiian shirts?”

“The best kind,” Scardino smirked.

Mayson glared at him. “Seriously. It may as well be Day-Glo. You couldn’t sneak up on a deaf man wearing that.”

“Hey, that’s what the black leather jacket’s for — camouflage. Besides, what kind of assistant DA nearly gets herself killed?”

In spite of herself, a smile ghosted across Mayson’s wan features. “The best kind.”
And I love this piece of dialogue. Mayson really scored there.

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Lois sighed, staring down at her hands twisted in her lap. “It’s just — you seem to have a ... a personal investment in this,” she finished quietly, unable to look at him.

Clark swallowed thickly and rubbed at the back of his neck. “Well, Lois ... I know what it’s like.”
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“Caring for, um, someone, you know, romantically, and — and having that person not, ah, return the sentiment.”
This is so stark, somehow, and so poignant. And it gets so strong because Clark is saying it to Lois.

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She whimpered softly in her fitful doze, and Scardino frowned. No, this wouldn’t be easy. Mayson could never know she was the bait who was going to lead him straight to Intergang.
This is overwhelmingly horrible. Mayson, already so broken and vulnerable, is going to be used, without her own knowledge, as the bait that is going to lead Scardino to Intergang.

I have no more time for feedback now, but as I said, it is very good to have you back with this story.

Ann