Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found Here



I'll post Part 33 by Sunday.

A/N: No dogs were actually owned, abused, and/or corrupted by Lex Luthor in the making of this story. This is just a work of fiction.

Now you've got me worried that Lois will later claim she didn't know what she was doing (or didn't remember) because of the anesthesia!

What a rat Lex is, bugging Lois' apartment.

Joan

Hi Virginia,

Luthor gives me the creeps: a stalker and a sociopath!

Mad Dog Xerxes is as scary as his master. In French, you say: "Tel maître, tel chien"

End of the part? No! No! I'm leaving Saturday morning and I'll be out of town (without my computer) for ten days!

Bedtime's when she gets her biggest strikes of inspiration, Luthor, don't you know that?

*snort* Or not. That's what you get when you apply your behavior onto someone else. I suppose it's a logical one but it's still a leap. I suspect bugging Kent's loft might help. :p

Thank you all for reading.

Joan: Lois is tired from the anesthesia, but not out of it (mentally). </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I believe I did mention there would be more S1 kissing than in canon, didn't I?

This time it's an actual four-parter, Virginia. Almost got to be five parts...

/imagines office with simple, efficient furniture, a comfortable chair and a high-end espresso machine in the corner/

Umm…the bedding-part of the plan was probably likely to develop a few kinks.





Stakeout!



/recommends anger management therapy/ Say, does his ex-wife do those, too?


He was there at the time.

Oops?



Oh boy. Say, can Superman return the favor and remove Lex’s fun equipment?

Wouldn’t’ the hospital staff be kind of required to look for him? Or did Lois write a bad expose about them?



Clark!

They probably put it in the circular filing bin. And isn’t that what the PA system is for?

I see, it’s kicking in now. Then again, sharing her byline is far more intimate than sharing her …well… what Lex means.

It’s ruined anyway.

Oh. And

Neither are their apartments. How about a hayloft in Kansas?

Lois does kind of love you.

Is all of Metropolis showing up?

Aaaaahhh



Remains?

Suicide by cop before he can wiggle free?

It does. In the Concubine Act of ’83. “Lords are responsible for all that their concubine does.”

Six *weeks*?

Buy a sniper rifle. Set up shop in a cloud above his balcony, take a pot shot when he exits.

Oh, wait, she was being sarcastic…

The hospital’s overbooked after Tommy went bananas in mid town.



Awwwwwww



Hey, this is the first time he’s in her apartment, isn’t it? Will he now discover the bugs? Yes, please? Pretty please? Which will still be awkward. Can he remove certain body parts from Lex? Also, Superman could use his fingernails to tear off tiny bits of Lex, working inwards from the fingers and toes. He could intermittently cauterize the wound so Lex won’t bleed out and has time to wake up again from this lapse in consciousness. To be repeated until he is only a torso and a head.

“Lex”
Clark: “What?”
Lois: “Lex. Lex is standing in the door.”



Not funny. Should start keeping FDK back till next part is posted.

Michael

PS: Yes, I will wait patiently for another umm…58? hours. I do have a lot of things to do. This respite will help. Uh-huh. Say, could you ask Lois if that denial actually works eventually? Oh, wait, nevermind. Unless Lois slaps him silly in the first paragraph of part 33, I guess the answer is ‘no’.

Edit: What do you mean 'Sunday'? That's four - repeat F O U R - days. That won't do.

You're right, Virginia. What I meant is that with a master like Lex, a dog could be very dangerous.

Yes!

Thank you!

Hate to break it to you, but you messed up the plan more than Clark.





I’m glad he has Cat



It ends there?! Oh what a cruel world!

Oh, that Cat! She's got all the best lines in this fic.

Yay a kiss! Lex is toast!

Michael: Okay, pie made, canning done, time for replying to FDK! (oh, it feels good to sit down.

Well, that, and he promised not to leave her side. He's also been bouncing around with his legs crossed for quite some time.

Well, my FDK-FDK has been narrowed down to 3-part response. Thus endith part 1.

Lucy didn't arrive until Clark left pre-op.

AFTER they changed her clothes.

I'm sure Lois didn't want it to be the first time he saw her chest either. (Although, technically, they didn't remove her bra, she wasn't fully exposed.)

Yep. She might start wandering around, searching for an exclusive.

Great, Michael, now you've done it!

Technically, they do discuss marriage in this part.

Suicide mission to some, pure bliss for others (okay, just one other... named Clark).

Lots of UST. It's a requirement with my Betas. Actually, only one of my Betas. The other one keeps sending me this guy: .

Thus endith FDK-FDK Part 2.

Michael's FDK-FDK - Part 3

Fight Night took place on a Saturday, so it will be Sunday (technically) by the time they return to Lois's apartment.

a) they don't know about the surveillance, and b) Lucy helping Lois out in the shower isn't as much fun for Lex?

Floating is not recommended due to Lex's cameras.

This is a demand, not a statement of fact. She realizes that it was actually true, by his response. Hence her line about how they're perfect for one another.

*Now* she knows.

No comment.

And James had thought Clark was The King! Chocolate covered?

He promises to shut his eyes.

Only Clark thinks this move is like Superman, anyway, Lex has gone hunting.

Um... Actually not.



Sorry, Lex has gone to the manor house.

Oh, dear. This originally wasn't the stopping spot for this Part, but then I added the scene with the DP staff and Lucy coming to wait with Clark back in, after cutting it, and spacing wise this seemed like a good spot. No?

Denial? No, she knows what's going on. And, no, she doesn't slap him silly in the first paragraph of Part 33. Actually, I don't even think she raises her voice in the whole part.

*BY* Sunday. Posted 32 on THURSDAY (or my Wednesday Night) - day one. Friday - Saturday - days 2 & 3. Will post late Saturday night (my time) / early Sunday (your time) Day 1, again. It's only 4 days if you count the days I post part 32 & 33, which would be incorrect. It's marked on my calendar and there are only two days (unmarked) in-between posting days (which are marked). From this point, roughly 30 hours.

Syndey: Yes, Lex probably wouldn't be approved by the Humane Society as someone who could adopt a pet, especially the way he treats other humans. Have a nice trip.

X Phile: Ooooh! Long FDK! I'll get right back with you after I answer your other posts.

IolantheAlias: Cat's lots of fun. Maybe when this story is all over and done, I'll write one where she becomes evil.

That's true for most characters of this ilk. Which is why when casting for "Grease" more actresses want to play Rizzo instead of Sandy.

Laura: Yes, a kiss. You asked for kisses. Hold on, here they come. If Clark won't fight Tommy Garrison, it very likely that Lex will survive the night. Unless, of course, Monique get ahold of an Uzi, but Lex doesn't prefer a fair fight, so I'm thinking "not".

X Phile: I'm back.

LOIS: Clark!

CLARK:

LOIS:

So we wouldn’t be too harsh with Clark for dismembering the bad guy?

He could still use the balloons to kidnap little children and make pie out of them?

Right. Monique should have been a dead giveaway. No pun intended.

Like you’re expecting all kinds of trouble when the family congregates for a wedding but nobody expected Tempus to show up?

Ah, exotic as in exotic dancer, not exotic as in not from the ‘Western World’. I just figured you didn’t want to write erotic.

Very vague. Those smilies have nothing to do with the PG-13 rating of the content and everyting with what Virginia is doing with Lex.

/Waits for part to show up on dark side/

He once removed a heart (okay, I think it was actually the part of the spinal column behind the heart) of a news caster on live television. At least, Kal-El did it in the privacy of their motel room. Very Shouldn’t have had that maxi-cola before meeting Lois and Lex.



So, you’re not reading Song of Ice and Fire or watching Game of Thrones, huh? The Mongol horde equivalent over there braids bells into their hair, one for each victory. Khaleesi is the wife of the Khal, their tribe leader. It’s all very awesome.



To be fair, he did jump off his balcony while Lex was closing in on him.

No. I mean, sure, he’s responsible for the offspring, at least so far as to take care of it, or what not. But other than that, not more so than a car owner is responsible for what happens to his car. He *is* allowed to wreck it with impunity, so long as he doesn’t endanger the public or make a mess, etc.



/raises hand/ Noticed it. Figured that’s just the stress talking and we’ve got more important things going on than *another* existential crisis of teenage Clark there. Lois will fix it with a swoon and a dive, anyway.

What’s Call-me-Daniel doing here?

Michael

Michael: Less than 6 hours now.



How did I know you'd bring up that possibility?

Coincidence I assure you.

Tempus? Tempus showed up at the wedding? A week before yes, but the day of? I thought that was Lex.

The way she moved was like an exotic dancer?

I'm sorry, do you want Lex's hijinks to be secret?

But he's been watching her apartment for over a month. I'm sure he's heard her sing at least once.



I believe Lex defines "benefits" different than most other people.

Don't hold your breath (couldn't find a smilie representing this sadly.)

How very un-Clark of him.

No, more like the prince from Princess Bride.

Why he was really 3 seconds late.

I don't think so, when they are only operating on the arm.

Talk to those involved in the gang shootout perhaps.

She usually used the services over at Metropolis University Hospital.

Um... Okay. Do you want to tell him, or do you expect me to?

Strangers are still strangers even when they are medical professionals. Just because they've seen other people's chests exposed in this manner, it's much different from the patient’s POV.

Squint all you want. It hasn't been written yet.

Ah. No. I spend all my free time writing. Currently my reading from off the boards includes S5 stories (for about 3 months now) and "The Male Mind" (I definitely recommend that one for women, but I'm only in the first chapter). But if you think I should broaden my hobbies and read more...

Henderson jumped off Lex's balcony when Lex closed in on him? No wonder we didn't see Henderson after S1. I totally missed that.

So, a master is not responsible if someone else shoots the concubine in the arm with a gun?



CLARK: I vote for "very distracted".

CLARK: In my defense. Lois is hurt and, well, asked for my help. <<grins innocently>>

Oh, dear.

Currently distracted.

Sorry, I missed that.

Or he believes Clark is being gentlemanly in front of Lois's sister.

It can't be both?

Yes, and the other time was when he brought Lois back from the Met. Sewage Rec. Fac.

What would be the point without the chocolate?



But the part was long enough already.



Yes, sorry, I posted Part 32 a whole 5 minutes early by mistake. I'll try not to make that mistake again. What? It can't be used on naughty Clarks? I was trying to avoid the obvious:

/carefully prods part 33 to see f it’s alive/



unless you’re purely in it for the cocoa, in which case the 80% dark chocolate is the way to go

Michael

By the time you posted that it was already breathing on it's own.

Shall I send him an invite if the lunkhead and the Mad Dog ever get their act together?

Typo?

Not knowing about Lex's penchant for making trouble makes it easier for you or the characters to sleep (in an ignorance is bliss sort of way)? Yeah, I can see that. Less outrage? From Clark? Probably. Don't worry, he and Lex aren't on each other 'friends and family' list. Well, actually, Clark is on Lex's but only because Lex wanted Clark to be annoyed to death by MCI's telemarketing calls during the dinner hour.

You know, when I first read that I thought you had written "outtage" like power outtage, and I'm like 'but I'm no where near MoSB.'

Yes, that too. Benefits can only be considered 'benefits' if the CEO also benefits from said benefits.

True, but once you kill one baddy what's going to stop him from killing another? And did he end up in jail for usurping the law/justice system like that? I'm betting not.

CLARK: That does sound good!



He does, doesn't he?

Michael

Pishaw! Lex can get exotic danger from his other girls. An exotic dancer on the other hand makes those videos jump! (My apologies to Lois)

That would be an abv. for "Man of Steel Bars."

The one written by Jerry and Joe?

LnC fic on Clark as a organ harvester? :p

I could just remind him that PML will be coming up shortly after... Clark! Clark! What are you doing with that hot poker? Michael said to use the hot poker, not me! Put that down!

I love the part that it's like a pet one with an extra squiggley meaning sentient being. <<I'm too embarrassed for Clark's naivety to look, too interested in seeing his reaction to THAT conversation with Zara to look away>> That's it?! Where's the rest? /psst. That's supposed to be a 'waiting' smilie, but I think it would work better with telescopic eyes looking instead of ear listening/

Oh, no! The calories are still there, but you have leave them on the plate in the form of a crumb.

Exotic danger? Like Japanese crabs?

Oh. Right. ‘Heatwave’. Like ASU being thought of only as ‘Nightfall’. My bad.

Nope. Bob and Bill. Had to look up both references, though (name and year). /points across the bay to Metropolis’ twin city.

I’m not sure where I got the idea from, but it’s my favorite bit, too. Hmm… Maybe it was a documentary on the deciphering of one of the Mesoamerican alphabets.

Me too. Well, not the embarrassment. It’s not written yet, though. It will come up in one form or another when someone has to break Lois to the leash, though. Umm… I meant, tell Lois of the concept so they can decide on how to best put her on a leash. Amm...

It’s kind of sitting on my harddrive, 1/3rd or so done.
I do have another NK one, though. The Wedding Crashers It, too, features cultural misunderstandings. /digs toe into carpet/
I thought so, too. Loved the tapping foot. And do you mean this one?

Oh, *that’s* why the good stuff makes you store calories. There usually are no crumbs left. Duh!

Michael

Like an non-American woman brandishing a knife to his throat.

London?

Just joking. You meant Boston? DC? Miami? Oh, right, Gotham City.

Ah. One of those fics I'll enjoy when I stumble across it and go, 'Hey, I wonder if this is the fic that Michael mentioned?'

Maybe you should feed that plot bunny some carrots (after you pull it out of the freezer and thaw it out) and work on it between FDK responses?

Good luck with surviving that one.

I started that one this morning before my kids insisted on breakfast. Is the Archive version much different from the Boards version?

I was looking for one with telescopic eyes and a tapping foot. I'm particular.

Precisely!

/shifty eyes/ I need to be awake *and* have more than a little bit of time to get actual writing done. That's the main issue.
There's one scene where the plot-device got reworked after some feedback. It's in part 3 or 4. Changed brawn to wits to solve an issue. Other than that, just minor polishing. I would recommend the archived version, or at least, checking out the reworked scene in the archived version when all is said and done OTOH, the board-version has certain *other* advantages. Like checking out the responses of the other readers in between parts. That's always lots of fun.
/walks really carefully, always on the look-out for a Lois.
Possibly. I'm quite willing to tell you though, if you don't mind it. I'm not sure if I yet mentioned the particular author, though.
/nods/ Me, too. Wouldn't it be nice to have a smiley database where you can use filter criteria? Like 'devil taps-foot bat'?

Michael

Oh, dear, I waited until too late in your holiday to remind you to write.



Maybe the next time you accidently give away the surprise ending (I've done that a couple of time myself when recommending fics. "You'll love this fic, but I can't tell you what it's called..." :rolleyes: )you can give me a list of 4-5 titles and say, "it's one of these. Maybe."

Devil Taps-foot bat? <<gulp>> guess this would be a bad time to tell you I got a little distracted from WC by starting that Water Fight Summer Ficathon story I signed up for.

Michael

You mean like eating your veggies to get dessert?

Hey, don't look now, between those two people kissing there... I told you NOT to look. Now, you've done it.

LOIS: A story? There's a story somewhere around here, and I've been kissing Clark?

CLARK: Great. Thanks, guys.

EW: <<opens up window to find time to read all those stories>>

Rough draft of the first half complete. Although, I think I may have stepped over the PG13 line in a place or two. (I'm thinking starting stories isn't a problem with you, Michael. You need someone to get you to finish them.)

yeah, kind of. Although, I do also complain if there’s too much meat and too few sidedishes.



Who said only Clark can pull off a secret identity. And can you imagine if Clark doesn’t recognize ‘Linda’ and starts flirting with her?

Which is why I won’t be posting any new story that’s not completely typed up and ready for beta and am trying not to start new stories that will take a long time before I finish the others.

Umm… ?

Michael

I just remembered that Lex will see Lois and Clark kiss. It is probably good she did not remember that who she was going to marry was Lex, that might have given him too much of a chance to have her comitted.

It is also good that Clark has not told Lois his secret, at least not in Lois' apartment. Hopefully if he does tell it will be some place where Luthor does not have survalaince.

Michael: You eat veggies? Wow! That's terrific. Trying very hard to get my son to do that. So far, I can only get him to eat carrots. On the plus side, he's got great eyesight.

Speaking of which that one will be coming to an Archive near you before too long.



A definate recommendation for all writers with a RL. I, myself, don't really have one. This is where I come to talk to people over age 8.

Oh, good, you've got one of those already! Great! New stories coming soon. Maybe you should sign up for one of DC's Fall ficathon topics. <<coaxing>> You have until Dec. 1 to get it in.

Well, he figured that they were already dating / intimate from the hug in the office from the few days previous.

She does still get creeped out by him enough to scrub her body after he kissed her and suggested she stay the night with him.

True. But only after she get fill of Clark. Oh, now I see the problem this Clark has.



How long was that one again? /remembers doing first ever fic immediately on both g and n and that turned out to be 27 parts. I did start out with the idea of it being 5-6 parts.

And then you have Lois talk and Clark talk and the response to it all immediately turns back to…well…I wouldn’t say it’s the typical adult conversation

No, not really. Especially at the moment. Would actually have to carefully go and knock on doors when I actually have something that’s fit to beta. But my back’s all nice and healed.

There’s a *new* ficathon. I still… umm… Michael

Yeah! Michael's gone off to write.

Oh dear. There was a bit of a scare involved.

Michael

Hmmmm. Let someone hold my green glowing rock who calls himself "Darth"? Hmmmm. Okay! <<tosses rock>> Have fun!

Oh, dear, you ran out of holiday.

/juggles shiny piece of rock before trying to poke tied down Kryptonian with it/

Michael

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by Darth Michael:
<strong> /juggles shiny piece of rock before trying to poke tied down Kryptonian with it/

You captured Nor?

Oooohhhh, this Lex is even worse!!! He's a mega-stalker!! I definitely hate him



My favorite quote:


And finally!!!! A kiss!!! Awwwww....

One question: is CK going to find the hidden micros and cameras, or is he going to be.... humm...."busy"??

chelo: Thank you for reading and commenting.
Yes, he's bad. I have a tendency to think I'm not making Lex sick and/or crazy enough, so he ends up seeming worse than he did in canon. In this universe, Lex has problems with the ladies.

They kissed before, on the plane. And that time she said that she could never have a relationship with a man who didn't love sweets. Oh, you mean finally AGAIN.

Busy? Oh, Clark is ALWAYS busy.

CLARK:

LOIS: Not in the way I want him to be *busy*

Ooops.

Oh, I thought Chelo meant finally a "non-ruse, non-breakup kiss". Although I was going to say "non-ruse" until you pointed out there was a kiss connected with the no sweets scene. That was a really tough scene that I only partially remember. I am just glad I did not start reading this story until they were in the midst of the Mencken's gym investigation. That was one of the toughest parts, maybe because I thought Lois would stay with her "I can not date a man who doesn't eat sweats" declaration.

She might have. I realized after I wrote Lois's no-sweets ultimatum that it wasn't a fair stance for Lois to keep. It was more a way for Lois to convince herself not to cheat on Superman.