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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 238
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 238
Yay! Chapter Six is up!

Feedback is welcome (Read as: If you think this sucked, please tell us why so we can fix it.)

Thank you very much to those who are reading this! To those who aren't, thanks for looking at this thread anyway! laugh


Just got married (21st June 2010).
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292
Kerth
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Kerth
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Posts: 2,292
Hmm, finally taking the plunge to give some feedback...

Generally, I really love your story. It's quite original, and, as I'm always curious about "new" cultures (make that new for me, for I hardly know anything about Asian cultures), I really like the idea of the Japanese Princess.

What I loved most about this chapter, though, was its last line. It's pretty obvious, really, and I had suspected something of that sort for a while. I still don't understand why the kimono turns out to have almost mystical healing properties, though. Probably the very same stuff?


The only known quantity that moves faster than
light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 238
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 238
Yeah. I believe Aki will be explaining that pretty soon. Says it ties up to a part of why the Yakuza is after the Princess and how the young Lord of Gion will finally make an impression. smile Then of course, Superman will save the day and we'll all have an ending we like. laugh


Just got married (21st June 2010).
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362
Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362
Admin note: This story has been removed at the author's request while it is reworked. It may be reposted here at a later date. Contact the author if you have questions.

LabRat smile



Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.


The Musketeers

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