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#32585 09/08/06 01:42 PM
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Ah, Caroline. I was very pleasantly surprised to see this section posted, as I'd read that we'd have to wait one more week for it. Thanks for making this particularly refreshing kind of lemonade. *g*

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Of course, only two days before, he’d been convinced that his place was at the Daily Planet. And then hours later, he’d been convinced that his place was with Wanda Detroit. Now he was sure that his place was helping at disasters. Obviously, he couldn’t be right on all counts. He’d have to be three people – or at the very least two
I love how you put that.

And I really like how the idea of the Supercostume still somehow came from Lois in this alternate reality. That whole thought process was very nicely laid out.

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“I’m trying to tell you, Mom. But this isn’t exactly the kind of thing...it’s not easy to tell you about this.”

Martha raised her eyebrows at that, and he realized that he might as well have waved a red flag in front of a bull. Oh, why had he started this conversation?

“Well, we don’t want to pry, honey, and if it’s none of our business you can tell us so,” Martha said, surprising him.

“Okay,” he said quickly, grasping at the miraculous chance for escape. “It’s none of your business.”

“But you might feel better if you got this off your chest,” she went on, as if he hadn’t spoken. “And of course, now that we know you’ve done something we wouldn’t approve of, we’ll be wondering what it is and probably imagining something much worse than whatever actually happened...right Jonathan?”

“Leave me out of this.” Jonathan reached for a second helping of pie. “If the boy wants to tell us, he’ll tell us.”

Martha shot him a glare, though whether it was because of his defection or because of the pie, Clark wasn’t entirely sure. His father didn’t seem to notice it at all.
I love Martha Kent. (And Jonathan, too.) I remember your making note of the parallelisms between Martha and Lois in If I Were You, and the shared tenacious curiosity in particular is really highlighted here.

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“Maybe you eloped!” She sounded hopeful this time, and Clark nearly choked.
That made me laugh. And did Martha's role in the conversation that followed.

Can't wait for the next installment, Caroline.

Have a good trip!


Chris
"Superman is a guy who's seen wonders we'll never see and Lois is to him, one of those wonders."
#32586 09/08/06 02:01 PM
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Super-powered sperm?!?!? Priceless!!! I laughed out loud, and not just at this!

Really, this was a precious installment. You gave us a peek into Clark's mind and heart and let us know how seriously he's taking his mistake. And, like Chris, I'm glad Lois provided the idea for Superman's costume, however inadvertantly.

I wonder how close to the mark Jonathan's assesment of Lois's emotional and mental state was. I think it was pretty much on the mark, considering all that we've seen of her so far. And I'm a little surprised that Perry hasn't spoken to Clark about extending his temporary contract, but then it adds to the tension for Clark to believe that he's only going to work at the Planet for two weeks.

How will he relate to Lois as Superman? Will she figure out who he really is, or will she wilt at the superhero's feet? Personally, I think neither. I expect her to be a good bit more cynical about the Big Blue Boy Scout in this reality, and I imagine that she'll ask some hard questions and not take his evasions for answers. Clark may have bitten off more than he can chew this time!

Have a good trip! And come back with lots and lots of great ideas!


Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.

- Stephen King, from On Writing
#32587 09/08/06 03:12 PM
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Oh nice job! Keep it coming! LAura


Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”

Caroline's "Stardust"
#32588 09/08/06 03:46 PM
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This chapter was worth the wait, Caroline!

I love how even though Clark thinks Lois is a pain in the a**, it is still her words and actions that ultimately lead to his idea for Superman.

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“IsleptwithawomanImetinabar.”
This is priceless. I can just see Clark's face, and Martha's face in response!

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His mom sounded far more offended by Lois’s rejection of him than she had been by his sleeping with Lois in the first place, and Clark couldn’t help loving her for it.
Gotta love Martha!

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You know how you didn’t tell me your real name? Well, I might have forgotten to mention that I’m really an alien from outer space with superpowered sperm...
I know Clark is in pain here, but that's a great, funny line!

This was great lemonade on a hot summer day, Caroline. Thank you, and I hope you have a good trip. And maybe you'll do some writing while you're away (hint, hint)? smile


lisa in the sky with diamonds
#32589 09/08/06 03:56 PM
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Hi,

Great part. thumbsup He gets the idea.


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“IsleptwithawomanImetinabar.” He said it as quickly as possible and addressed it to his half-eaten piece of pie. He felt his parents go absolutely still and he took another deep breath. “She didn’t give me her real name or tell me anything about herself. It turns out...she works for the Daily Planet. Things are, uh, awkward now.”
I can believe he said it. eek


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Clark sighed. “I don’t even know, Dad. That’s the thing. She’s beautiful...I do know that.”

“Blonde?”

Clark smiled. “Brunette.”

“I prefer blondes,” Jonathan said, his eyes twinkling.

“I always have, too.” Clark admitted. “But there was just something about this woman, Dad. From the moment I set eyes on her, it was like I’d been struck by lightening. And the worst of it is I still kind of feel that way, even though most of me can’t stand her. It doesn’t make sense, does it?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Jonathan sounded sympathetic. “I reckon you’re not the first man to feel that way.”
hyper

More ASAP, please.

MAF hyper


Maria D. Ferdez.
---
Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
#32590 09/09/06 03:46 AM
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hi Caroline,

Sorry to hear about your car trouble - but then again, what a treat to see your next chapter posted early. I liked how Clark makes a connection of how different Lois and Wanda are and that he could be very different from his “Clark” persona by just changing his clothes and acting differently as the hero. Also, great dialog between Clark and his folks. They are forever his greatest cheerleaders.

I am looking forward to your next part. smile1
Write On!
Anne

#32591 09/09/06 04:19 AM
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Enjoyed Clark's talk with his dad. I hope for more father son stuff.


"I'm red-eyed, tired and drunk" Teri Hatcher
"Fun will now commence" 7of9
#32592 09/09/06 08:51 AM
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Well, Caroline, after Incognito, Terry Leatherwood and Mrs Mosley posted, what can I add?

Well, if nothing else, I guess I can repeat some things that they said. And really, they didn't quote everything I liked. I loved how you contrasted Wanda Detroit and Lois Lane in this paragraph:

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Wanda Detroit had been soft curves and sweet laughter, gentle caresses and hope for the future. Lois Lane was sharp corners and cutting insults, flashing eyes and petty revenge. She was not someone he could like, let alone love.
But even though Clark doesn't like her, he most certainly can't forget her:

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And he didn’t like her – not one little bit – but that didn’t keep her from holding a terrible fascination for him. He hadn’t seen her much after their conversation in the conference room, but the few times they’d both been in the newsroom, he’d felt a powerful awareness of her, as if the whole room became charged with electricity the minute she entered it.
You make me feel how Lois has burnt and seared herself into Clark's body and mind. He may not like it, and he may not like her, but he can't help responding to her so powerfully.

Even having her mercifully out of his sight can't make him stop thinking about her:

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Once she was gone, he’d at least been able to think straight, but even that wasn’t much of a reprieve, since his thoughts continued to return to her, again and again
But the thought of Lois isn't the only thing torturing him. He hasn't become Superman yet, and therefore he is watching passively from the sidelines when there is a major disaster. The Messenger tragedy is making him feel ever more urgently that he can't ignore his need to use his super-abilities to help people:

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It went against every inclination to stand by and do nothing when it was possible for him to help, and he felt as though he’d been locked for years in a battle with his own nature. Every time he did nothing when he could have been making a difference, he was a little closer to losing that battle, a little closer to a step that seemed as inevitable as it was terrifying.
I love how you show us how Clark is doing battle with himself (and to some extent with his parents) when he is debating whether or not to use his powers in public to help people.

Doing battle with himself also means asking himself if his cherished goal of becoming a journalist is in fact an obstacle to what he really ought to do:

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He loved being a journalist, and he thought he was pretty good at it, but he had a whole set of unique abilities that weren’t being used at all. As he’d watched the emergency crews desperately trying to extinguish the Messenger fire, he’d known deep down that his place was with them, and that it was only his own cowardice that kept him from doing what he knew he should be doing.

And I love Clark's introspection, his questioning of who and what he is, and what he ought to be:
[QUOTE] Of course, only two days before, he’d been convinced that his place was at the Daily Planet. And then hours later, he’d been convinced that his place was with Wanda Detroit. Now he was sure that his place was helping at disasters. Obviously, he couldn’t be right on all counts. He’d have to be three people – or at the very least two – and that was impossible, even for him.
I also love your little exposition on why Clark prefers one set of clothes over another:

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Clark was invulnerable, so one set of clothes was no more or less comfortable for him than another, but it still felt good to peel off his dress shirt and tie at the end of the day and climb into his blue jeans and a t-shirt instead. He had been out of college for years, but he still felt like a kid playing dress-up every time he put on a coat and tie. He hadn’t had to wear a tie to the Smallville Press office, but working at the Daily Planet called for a more polished look. If by some miracle the job worked out, he’d have to expand his professional wardrobe.
And this paragraph leads so beautifully into the next, which in turn does such a beautiful job of describing Lois's way of dressing as well as Wanda Detroit's:

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Lois had looked every inch the polished professional that day, sleek and stylish and utterly different from Wanda Detroit. Wanda’s clothes had been loud and just a little too obvious for his usual tastes, but Lois had been dressed conservatively, in a suit that flattered her figure without flaunting it. It would not be true to say that Lois faded into the background when she wasn’t dressed as Wanda Detroit – he had a feeling that she’d have caught his eye in any case – but she certainly looked different.
And this in turn leads so beautifully into the thought of changing one's appearance with clothing:

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if he hadn’t confronted her practically nose-to-nose, he might well have missed the fact that she was Wanda. Apparently he’d walked right by her the day before without even realizing it.

Astonishing.
And in the next paragraph you make us see, again so delightfully, how Clark uses Lois as a model for what he himself would have to do to assume a different identity:

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He’d told her that she couldn’t change her whole identity by changing her hair and clothes, but he was beginning to think that maybe she had. If he understood the situation rightly, she had put together a whole other person out of bits and pieces she found in her closet and then had given that person license to behave in a way she wouldn’t normally behave. It had worked because she had believed it herself; for those few hours, she had let herself be Wanda Detroit.
And he is beginning to believe that he could do what Lois had done:

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Maybe he’d always been two people – Clark Kent of Kansas and a visitor from Krypton – and it was finally time for the Kryptonian to get dressed up and come out of hiding. If Lois Lane could be Lois by day and Wanda Detroit by night, why couldn’t he be both Clark Kent and...well, whatever he decided to call that part of himself that could fly across the country in minutes and lift his father’s truck with one hand? If he could find something distracting enough to wear – Wanda’s tight pink sweater flashed through his mind – and change his body language, he was sure that no one would think to associate him with a bespectacled reporter covering minor stories for the Daily Planet.
This is so delightfully well done.

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The rich aroma of his mother’s home cooking greeted him before he’d even landed in the yard of his parents’ small farmhouse. When he drifted to earth, he stood silently in the glow of a lighted window for a moment, listening to chirping of the crickets and the rustle of the wind in the trees. Inside the house, he could hear the gentle clanking sounds of his mother getting dinner. After the day he’d had – after the week he’d had – he was moved by the sheer normalcy of a quiet night in Kansas and the knowledge that the two people inside the house loved and welcomed him. He didn’t try to deny the instant affinity he’d felt for Metropolis or for the busy newsroom at the Daily Planet, but he realized in that moment how lucky he was that wherever his wandering had taken him, he’d always had this one precious place in the world to come home to.
I'm sorry my quotes are so long, but often I find it impossible to divide your delightful paragraphs into smaller snippets. Here, you make me feel so strongly the peace and quiet as well as the soothing warmth of the Kent farm, Clark's haven of refuge from the too-demanding world. And you make me feel, Caroline, how cruel it is that the Superman movies as well as the Smallville show have killed Jonathan and deprived Clark of much of his parental support.

I loved how Clark looked at his mother's sculpture with little understanding, but how the name of it reminded him powerfully, painfully of Lois (and what they had done together):

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“Do you like it?” she asked eagerly. “I call it Too Much, Too Soon, Tortured Heart, Waning Moon.”

Too much, too soon...

Well, that sounded about right. His reunion with his parents had temporarily pushed Lois Lane to the back of his mind, but his mother’s art project brought her back again with a vengeance. Or, not the art project, exactly, since to his untrained eye it wasn’t much more than a twisted heap of scrap metal, but the name of it sounded like it had been plucked straight from his own folly.
I absolutely love how you describe Clark and Martha here:

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“You...blew it?” his mother repeated. “How did you do that?”

His mother was on full-alert now, and he realized he hadn’t thought this conversation through well enough. He wished he could take it all back, but he knew he couldn’t, and he also knew that his mother wasn’t going to be satisfied with half-truths and evasions.

“Clark?” she prompted, her voice just a little sharper than it had been before.

He resisted the urge to squirm and wondered if she’d ever lose the power to make him feel like he was five years old. He couldn’t meet her eyes as he said, “I, uh, did something I shouldn’t have. Something you’re probably not going to approve of.”
And I just love how Martha sets about wheedling the truth of what has happened out of Clark:

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“Well, we don’t want to pry, honey, and if it’s none of our business you can tell us so,” Martha said, surprising him.

“Okay,” he said quickly, grasping at the miraculous chance for escape. “It’s none of your business.”

“But you might feel better if you got this off your chest,” she went on, as if he hadn’t spoken. “And of course, now that we know you’ve done something we wouldn’t approve of, we’ll be wondering what it is and probably imagining something much worse than whatever actually happened...right Jonathan?”
This little bit of interaction between Martha and Jonathan is delightful too:

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“Leave me out of this.” Jonathan reached for a second helping of pie. “If the boy wants to tell us, he’ll tell us.”

Martha shot him a glare, though whether it was because of his defection or because of the pie, Clark wasn’t entirely sure. His father didn’t seem to notice it at all.
And all of this is just totally irresistible:

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“It’s not that important,” Clark said.

“You know we’ll love you no matter what,” his mother said. “Even if you...lied on your resume...”

“I didn’t...”

“Or broke the law...”

“I would never...”

“Or accidentally started a fire...”

“Mom, I haven’t done that since I was...”

“Maybe you eloped!” She sounded hopeful this time, and Clark nearly choked.

“Mom!”
Maybe you eloped...and she sounded hopeful when she said it! It's absolutely, totally adorable.

And finally Clark gives in - and this must be one of the best, and best-written, confessions I have come across in all of LnC fanficdom:

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“IsleptwithawomanImetinabar.” He said it as quickly as possible and addressed it to his half-eaten piece of pie.
I love how he is speaking to his pie!

And how do his parents react?

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He peeked at his mother and saw that she actually looked...excited? pleased? He wasn’t exactly sure; he only knew that whatever look she had on her face was a far cry from the disapproval he’d anticipated.
Martha, I love you!

Of course, Jonathan is more predictable:

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A glance at his father revealed something closer to what he’d thought he’d see. Jonathan looked shocked, and yes, disapproving. Somehow, it was almost comforting. In a day that had been full of unexpected reactions, it was reassuring to know that there was one person in the world whose responses he could predict.
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“You met someone?” Martha asked, leaning forward. “Tell us about her.”
Oh, Martha, Martha. I do love you.

But poor Clark:

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Clark groaned. “I didn’t meet someone, Mom. It was a one-night-stand. That’s not the same thing.”

“It certainly isn’t,” Jonathan said sternly.
And his father is appropriately disapproving.

But Martha won't be put off so easily:

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“But you liked her,” Martha argued. “You must have. And now you’re working together....”
This is irresistible.

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“Oh, trust me, Mom – I’m convinced. She didn’t leave a lot of room for doubt. She doesn’t want anything to do with me now.”

“Well, she must not have very good taste.” His mom sounded far more offended by Lois’s rejection of him than she had been by his sleeping with Lois in the first place, and Clark couldn’t help loving her for it.
And like others have already pointed out, it's adorable how Martha defends her boy - a girl who rejects him can't have very good taste!

I love how Jonathan shows his support for Clark too, especially when he endorses Clark's plans of going public with his powers:

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I worry about folks finding out about you...probably always will. At the same time, I don’t want you to be less than the man you are. I would never want that.”

Clark felt his throat tighten. There was so much he wanted to say just then, but all he could manage was a soft word of thanks. His father seemed to understand, and his mother, too.
And again I apologize for the long quote, but this conversation between Clark and his mother is irresistible:

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She reached up and cupped his chin in her hand, forced him to look her in the eye. “We’re proud of you. You know that, right?”

He felt the shame burn through him. He didn’t deserve this kind of support, but oh, he was so glad he had it. “I really messed up, Mom.”

“Yep.” She released his chin and patted his cheek. “You did. And I know it probably seems like the end of the world right now.”

He nodded. Yes, it felt a lot like that.

“It’s not though, honey. You’re still young. This is just a bump in the road.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle. “Mom, I think you and Mr. White would really get along.
How wonderfully loving and supportive Martha is, and I love how Clark can discern a certain similarity between her and Perry White.

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“I prefer blondes,” Jonathan said, his eyes twinkling.

“I always have, too.” Clark admitted. “But there was just something about this woman, Dad. From the moment I set eyes on her, it was like I’d been struck by lightening. And the worst of it is I still kind of feel that way, even though most of me can’t stand her. It doesn’t make sense, does it?”
I love this conversation between Clark and Jonathan (but I think you should spell those flashes from the sky lightning)....

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Clark looked up at the stars, wondering for the millionth time which was his.
The astronomy buff in me loves how Clark is looking at the night sky, wondering which star is his own (Clark, you wouldn't necessarily be able to see it....)

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“The night I met her she was funny...and easy to talk to, like we’d known each other forever. I know I shouldn’t have...rushed things, but I just....” He stopped himself before he said something truly embarrassing and melodramatic about how he’d thought he’d found the woman of his dreams. “Anyway, now she says that it wasn’t real. That she was just playing a part and that she never promised me more than one night. That she doesn’t want to work with me because I won’t be able to respect her.”

“Is that true?”

“Of course not! She’s the best investigative reporter in Metropolis. I’ve read her work – it’s amazing. Why wouldn’t I respect her?”
Clark gets to espress the problem plagueing him and Lois, the way he understands it. And he gets to tell his father that he respects Lois.

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“Do you respect yourself right now?”

The question was asked gently, but it hit Clark like a blow to the gut. “No,” he admitted. “I guess I don’t.”
This is very insightful of Jonathan.

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“Well, maybe she feels the same way. I’m not defending her, mind you. Any woman who lies about who she is sounds like trouble to me, and I think you’re probably better off without her. But maybe her problem has more to do with how she feels about herself than how she feels about you.”
This, too, is very insightful.

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“I admit we’ve wondered....” His father broke off, and Clark looked at him curiously.

“Wondered what?”

Jonathan cleared his throat and looked off into the distance. “It wasn’t any of our business, of course, but we wondered...with your strength...if it was even possible for you to....”

“Oh.” Clark felt his face flame with embarrassment, and then, just as quickly, his entire body seemed to go cold with horror as the implications of what his father had just said really sank in.
This is a delightfully embarrassing situation. Still, it makes me wonder about Martha and Jonathan. Didn't they ever find it necessary to talk to Clark about the birds and the bees, when some of them are superpowered and some of them are not?

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How was it that his strength had never once crossed his mind while he was making love to Wanda Detroit? It hadn’t been a problem, thank God
With my preferences, it's extremely important that lovemaking mustn't be a problem for Lois and Clark.

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but what if it had been? What if he had hurt her...or killed her? He was used to controlling his strength while doing everyday tasks, but that had been the first time he’d ever had sex. And he’d been so addled by lust that it hadn’t even occurred to him to worry about how his differences might manifest themselves while he was being intimate with a woman. At the time, the fact that he’d remembered condoms had been a small miracle.
Yes, the fact that he had had sex with a woman without telling her about his "difference" had been irresponsible. To be absolutely frank about it, even telling the woman wouldn't be enough. Clark really should have had himself tested by someone like Dr Klein before he had sex with an Earth woman.

And how can he be so sure that he didn't make Lois pregnant?
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Did he even know that condoms worked on him? What if they didn’t? He couldn’t have given her any diseases, but could he get a woman pregnant? If that were even a possibility, he would have to discuss it with Lois – as if she needed more incentive to hate him.
It sure looks as if he will have to have a talk with Lois:

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You know how you didn’t tell me your real name? Well, I might have forgotten to mention that I’m really an alien from outer space with superpowered sperm...
This is just adorably funny, even though it is serious, too.

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Clark was too preoccupied with his own reckless irresponsibility to even think about marriage and family just then. Every good feeling he’d had since arriving at the farm seemed to have fled and been replaced by raw nerves. Suddenly all he wanted was to get away, to be alone with his thoughts and self-recriminations. He’d spent most of the day casting Lois Lane as the villain in this piece, but hadn’t he been just as dishonest? Hadn’t his been the more dangerous lie?
I have often thought that Clark has been unable to really look at how he himself is treating Lois, so I'm glad he is asking himself some hard questions here.

Well, this was a most delightful chapter, Caroline. Wonderful, in fact. You are such a brilliant writer, choosing your words, building your images and stringing together your narrative so masterfully. And it was so enjoyable to spend this chapter in the company of Clark and his parents!

Ann

#32593 09/11/06 02:11 AM
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This part was great, like is this whole story. smile1

Andreia smile


"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."

~ Superman: Man of Tomorrow #15
#32594 09/11/06 08:36 PM
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I'm just now catching up with this story. I love it! I Look forward to more. It should be interesting when Superman comes into the picture. I also look forward to Lois getting jealous when the women at the Planet start flirting with Clark. I imagine Cat will be first in line! wink


Silence is golden.
Duct tape is silver.

~Saw it on a T-Shirt.
#32595 09/12/06 05:50 AM
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Caroline for a while I've wondered why I'm so attracted to your portrayal of Clark, I think it's the fact that you make him into a philosopher, he really think about his relationship to the world. His love for Lois is only a part of that and it makes him feel very real.
In the series I tended to get irritated when Martha an Jonathan showed up in every episode but I loved the characters, and the way they served as a soundingboard for his morale quandries. They were the only people in the whole world he truly trusted.


I do know you, and I know you wouldn't lie... at least to me...most of the time...
#32596 09/16/06 07:22 AM
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Thank you so much to everyone who offered feedback on this part! It was such fun to come home to your comments.

I don't have time right now to respond to them individually, much as I would like to, but I did want to let readers know that I'm back and still writing. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get much writing done while I was away (5 kids under 8 in one beach house = very little writing time!) so the next part is probably a week or so away. It's a Lois part, and her POV is consistently harder for me to write - not sure why, but I want to take my time with it and hopefully get it right.

Thanks again to all who are following the story, and welcome to symbolicangel - thanks for letting me know you'd given "Stardust" a try smile .

More soon -

Caroline


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