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Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found HereSuperman coming over to Luthor's penthouse at Lex's request always seemed to be an iffy way to catch him in a trap, being that Superman might refuse the invitation. Therefore, I devised this new bait for my story. For those of you who are interested, I shall plot out Lex's plan, but I will hide it from obvious view, in case there are those of you who don't want me to spell it out for you.  Lex had a fire set early in the morning at the Luthor House for Homeless Children, because he knew Superman would come to help. It was merely a distraction. He wanted Superman to assume that the woman in Lex's office was Lois Lane, being that she was having brunch with her fiance that morning.
While Superman was busy taking care of the fire, Lex had Lois over for brunch. Mrs. Cox was to come and inform Lex as soon as their man on the ground at the LHfHC said that Superman was almost finished with his efforts.
At that time, Lois was to be taken (by Nigel) down to the limousine waiting in his private underground garage until given the 'all clear' sign by Lex. This way she would be out of obvious sight from Superman, when he flew past upon leaving the LHfHC, so there would be no way for Superman to know for certain that the woman he saw in Lex's office wasn't Lois. It would also get Lois conveniently out of the way. Thirdly, Lois was to be taken for a "day of pampering" where she couldn't possibly hear of the fire or of Superman's disappearance.
After Lois left, Lex entered the secret room in his office and opened his lead lined safe, hidden behind a painting painted with lead based paint. From his safe, he removed 3 items. Two of these items he handed to Mrs. Cox.
Clearly, one of the items was the Kryptonite necklace found around the neck of the faux Lois. Can you guess what the other two items were? The answer to one of items was within the first scene of this part. The third item Lex placed into a machine on his desk and pressed "start"... otherwise known as "play".
Lex, then, opened the doors to his balcony, so that when Superman flew past, he would have a clear view and line of hearing for what was occurring in Lex's office. Superman could also easily enter Lex's office without damaging any walls or windows (such as Lex had seen occur at Lois's apartment when she screamed in her sleep). When Lex turned around from his desk, he "saw" Lois standing before him. He "heard" her voice (playing on the machine). But Lois was either in the elevator headed down to the underground garage or already there, waiting in the limousine, so it wasn't Lois in Lex's office, but Mrs. Cox in disguise.
The trap was simple. Superman was emotionally exhausted from dealing with a fire where some of the children may or may not have been killed (inconsequential to Lex). He would hear Lois and Lex arguing in Lex's office. He would see Lex hurt Lois physically (the slap to the face... btw, Mrs. Cox didn't know about that part, which is why she slipped out of character for a minute and had to be hushed by Lex), or sexually, when Lex pushed "Lois" down upon his desk. Lex figured that Superman upon seeing and hearing what was happening to what visually appeared by quick glance to be Lois, that he would react without thinking, without evaluating the situation for any flaws, and be in Lex's office before he realized that there was Kryptonite inside the room. Thank you for reading. Well, you all knew I'd probably end up going there, so I decided to add my own little twist to Lex's torture chamber. What do you think? Comments?
Last edited by VirginiaR; 05/22/14 02:35 AM. Reason: Edited Text
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Hmmm... so I was right in my initial assumption that it was Mrs. Cox. I like the mask - I didn't figure that out until she said that she wanted to feel him. A mask that realistic is so old-school-comics.  I figure that the turtleneck and gloves were to hide the difference in skin color. The video.... First, it's not necessarily live. It could just as easily be pre-recorded. Second, I'm sure it's in Lois's apartment in the ark. Lex certainly has enough surveillance on her real apartment to keep up with any changes. Third.... I'm not certain who the woman is, but I've got a guess. It's not Lois, and it's not a clone, and there's apparently no mask, so that leaves that woman Ariana was working with who got plastic surgery. Though I'm not convinced that it's not a mask - it could be some other woman who has the same skin color as Lois, and the edges of the mask are well-blended. How good is the resolution on that TV, anyway? I'm a bit surprised that Lois is going through with the spa day, given how much she doesn't want it. I'm debating whether to read your spoiler-text.... Ok, I might as well. I suppose I should respond to it in a spoiler, too. Ok, most of Lex's plan was clear. The audio tape certainly wasn't. And by the time I read about Superman crashing in Lex's office, I had long forgotten about the mysterious items that he had pulled from his vault. At the time, I was confused at what they were, and then I forgot about them with everything else that happened. I'm not sure whether the problem there is that it was really too vague or it's just my bad memory.
"It is a remarkable dichotomy. In many ways, Clark is the most human of us all. Then...he shoots fire from the skies, and it is difficult not to think of him as a god. And how fortunate we all are that it does not occur to him." -Batman (in Superman/Batman #3 by Jeph Loeb)
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I know I probably went overboard on full disclosure of Lex's plan... but, technically, I didn't describe what he's going to do with Superman now that he has him, just what he did to trap him. Loving the new Spoiler feature.  mrsMxyzptlk: Thank you for your comments. Hmmm... so I was right in my initial assumption that it was Mrs. Cox. I like the mask - I didn't figure that out until she said that she wanted to feel him. A mask that realistic is so old-school-comics. I figure that the turtleneck and gloves were to hide the difference in skin color. Yes to everything. Everyone always forgets about the Lex Luthor mask that Chip wore to his death, so I thought I'd use that technology here as a fun twist. Lex knew that he could convince Mrs. Cox to do almost anything... making her wear a Lois Lane mask proved it. The video....
First, it's not necessarily live. It could just as easily be pre-recorded. Yes, things that Clark will eventually contemplate. Second, I'm sure it's in Lois's apartment in the ark. Lex certainly has enough surveillance on her real apartment to keep up with any changes. Hmmmmm. Makes sense. Third.... I'm not certain who the woman is, but I've got a guess. It's not Lois, and it's not a clone, and there's apparently no mask, so that leaves that woman Ariana was working with who got plastic surgery. Though I'm not convinced that it's not a mask - it could be some other woman who has the same skin color as Lois, and the edges of the mask are well-blended. How good is the resolution on that TV, anyway? Not good resolution. As I mentioned, it was like a black and white security video. Who the woman is will be revealed... in a manner of speaking... in time. I'm a bit surprised that Lois is going through with the spa day, given how much she doesn't want it. She's playing her part of bride to the hilt. Also, I wanted to compare and contrast Lois and Clark's day. I'm debating whether to read your spoiler-text.... Ok, I might as well. It's soooo tempting. Like that last couple of cookies in the cookie jar... I suppose I should respond to it in a spoiler, too. If you like. Ok, most of Lex's plan was clear. The audio tape certainly wasn't. And by the time I read about Superman crashing in Lex's office, I had long forgotten about the mysterious items that he had pulled from his vault. At the time, I was confused at what they were, and then I forgot about them with everything else that happened. I'm not sure whether the problem there is that it was really too vague or it's just my bad memory. Yes, I know I wasn't very obvious about the thing in the machine. My betas both mentioned that to me as well, but I didn't want to give away the surprise. I'll come back to it again to make it more clear (although, it might be weeks away here, it won't seem so far in the Archive version). Thanks, again, for reading and commenting.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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I am posting a WHAM warning due to the repeat of the WHAM scene from Part 172, only this time from Clark's POV. CLARK:  ER: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/teufel/d090.gif) the concept of intense pain and the knowledge of how it could bend a man to its will were new to Clark. First time he had indigestion? Not to mention the heartburn from swallowing that bomb.  Not from the Kryptonite, but from the agony of Lois’s betrayal. How could she have…? Really? He’s not the smartest one out there. LOIS: I’m not lusting after his brains. Upon seeing the Kryptonite necklace, he recalled glancing up into Lois’s face and wondering why. Oooh! So, it’s not that he’s still out there. He’s already smack on the ground, thinking that she’s doing it again. LOIS: Well…it didn’t take the first time so… Or the second time. She had run her gloved fingers down his cheek, as he had stared wordlessly into those eyes. So, just some light makeup, huh> Then she had pressed her mouth to his, biting his bottom lip, Awww…she’s trying to go for his power. BETSY: Wrong TV show. less than a moment later, pushed him down to the floor with her knee to his belly… well, under his belly… under his diaphragm, really. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/k085.gif) Why lead him on, renew his hope, and then kill him like this? LEX:  There was no sense in adding cruelty to another person’s death. LEX: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/o025.gif) No, I think they’re transparent. Luthor grabbed the back of her head and brought her lips to his in a celebratory kiss. CLARK:  Luthor glanced down at Superman, lying prone at his feet. “I’m sure our guest would rather see me take you like this, Lois.” So, are they allowed to shoot home invaders in New Troy or do people have to call the police? pushing her hair out of her face until it fell off the back of her head and down to the floor.
How was that possible? Clark must have been dreaming. Radiation sickness from wearing a radioactive rock around her neck? “It appears that’s not true, anymore,” she said, pulling her face forward from the back of her head. She peeled her skin away from her face and let it drop to the floor next to her hair. Yeah, she’s melting, all right. They really should not hand out Kryptonite to just about anybody. Also, you are doing a reference when they used Chip as a Lex stand-in, huh? Either that, or Lois was more of an alien than he was. ![[Linked Image]](http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120521120404/men-in-black/images/thumb/6/69/Edgar-human_SS_01.jpg/200px-Edgar-human_SS_01.jpg) One last glance through his cracked eyes and he saw that it was Mrs. Cox, not Lois, standing there next to his nemesis.  Now…WAY!  Oh, sure. She could hear the pro argument: eating good food, hanging out with high society people, entrée into the choicest events, dressing up to the nines, and being spoiled rotten at the swankiest spa in Metropolis. On the downside: Getting it on with a creep? Come on, the guy had wept on their first date. Oh boy…he’s going to be a mess during their first time together! but she knew she was refilling his love tank as well. CLARK: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/c085.gif) Yeah, let’s call it that… She felt as if she needed a full body chemical peel to cleanse herself of her faux fiancé. He does have kind of sticky fingers, doesn’t he? “Dylan will be here in a few minutes,” Oooh! Lois nude in a room with some random dude. ‘Bubbles’ informed her before leaving Lois in this… this… love shack of a room. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/verschiedene/b075.gif) Lex arranged for her to have a bachelorette outing after all! Why in the world would Lex think she’d want some strange guy to rub her naked body? Clark on the other hand… And we go off to lala land… Her idea of a relaxing day was chasing down a hot lead, writing up the story, and then spending the evening with Clark discussing their next story. This spa had none of that. Maybe it’s a spa with benefits and Lois gets to break the story? when a perfectly ordinary middle-aged woman in a white nurses uniform entered.
“I’m Dylan,” she announced.  Of course, Lex wouldn’t have hired a man to touch her body before he did.
“Can I get a chemical peel?” The words ran out of her mouth before Lois could stop them.  “Also, since it peels away the outer layers of your skin, it can take up to ten days to recover from the procedure and have your skin back to one hundred percent. Therefore, we don’t recommend it for anyone under stress or about to be married.” So, up to ten days of Lois looking like raw meat? LOIS: Perfect way to keep Lex’s hands off me! Wait. They really used chemicals to remove the outer layers of someone’s skin? ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d025.gif) It’s even on TV shows back in the 90s. It wasn’t a metaphor or a figurative ‘peel’, but a literal one? People paid money to have this procedure done to them? Were they nuts? Well, so much for that idea. Dylan gestured to the silver platter. “Also, you need to drink the entire bottle of water afterwards, because you can get dehydrated and nauseous. You wouldn’t want that before your happy day.” Well…it will happen during her happy day, so… “And wait for you to slip under the sheet?”
“Just a few more minutes,” Lois admitted, crossing her ankles still dangling from this padded table.
Dylan nodded and left the room, telling Lois that she’d return in a couple of minutes. Dylan sounds like the concubine mistress from Teeej!’s Care and Training, making sure the concubine is all ready to receive her First Lord. “But I don’t have to like it.”
***
Clark was startled awake by a splash of water to his face. CLARK: So, let me get this straight. Lois is getting pampered while I’m getting beaten? Really? Rewrite! Rewrite, over here! Without a hero to rescue her, she’ll soon tire of fighting me all the time.” LOIS: Ooops? Was I not supposed to stick that steak knife into my husband’s ribcage? “And I have vanquished the one man who could have taken it all away from me. Lex vanquished Tempus? I thought that that feat was accomplished by the man himself? and I’ll let you see just how blissfully happy she is without you. Cameras in the massage parlor? Lois loves me, he reminded himself. What will she do when I don’t show tonight? BILL HENDERSON: /picking up the phone/ Ye-? LOIS: /loud, unintelligible screeching/ BILL: What? Lois? What’s going on? Slow down… She peered out the peephole and a smile blossomed across her face. Unfastening her locks, Lois opened the door and let Luthor inside her apartment. Huh. Looks like he’s found a double and is making use of his TV studio apartment. No, wait, she knows she’s being watched and makes the appropriate face for the cameras. Duh! She wrapped her arms about Luthor’s neck and pressed her lips to his. LOIS: /to the audience/ Zofran. You need some in every spy’s household. Clark’s jaw dropped open. Never had Lois ever kissed Luthor. That he knows of. She had certainly never initiated a kiss That he knows of. Unfortunately, they had moved to the settee and, with no better term available, were making out like teenagers. So…you said no clones. So…the double Ari dug up? Clark watched as Luthor’s hand moved down Lois’s body, touching her in places he had only dreamed about. Lex! ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/boese/a045.gif) This is no way to treat a lady. LEX: Of the night. Yes, it is. Luthor moved his hand to her shoulder and moved it down her arm, taking the top of the robe along with it. So, Lex figured that maybe Superman might not make it to the morrow, or Lois might be a tad more unreceptive, so he put up a special show? Or did he find a new formula for Revenge and had it massaged into Lois? She knew he was coming to take her to the theatre and she had been waiting for him, waiting to seduce him.
Why? Last chance before she says no to him at the altar? And touch her so intimately? Why? The money’s good? So, why remove the sound? Because she’s not screaming? Plus, her voice is a tad immature? Like a 5-day-old frog’s? He only needed to visually find something to verify his theory. Unfortunately, he hasn’t seen her naked yet, that he remembers. So, will he get a strange sense of ‘that’s not right’ when he sees her naked upper body? The strap of the woman’s negligee slipped off her right shoulder and down her bicep, revealing more of her chest. Ooooh! Will Clark notice the missing bullet scar? Well, you all knew I'd probably end up going there You mean, end it at this point?  You said that the WHAM would be for Clark seeing things in Lex’s office. You’re a trickster!  Michael
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Darth Michael: Just under the wire. Thanks for feeding my inbox.  First time he had indigestion? Yes. And, well, no. He did date Lana.  LANA: What is she talking about? I don't cook. Really? He’s not the smartest one out there.
LOIS: I’m not lusting after his brains. CLARK: But... but... but... she was right there! /turns to Lois/ But I'm lusting after yours. LOIS: /giggles/ Oh, Clark. Stop it! Oooh! So, it’s not that he’s still out there. He’s already smack on the ground, thinking that she’s doing it again.
LOIS: Well…it didn’t take the first time so… Or the second time. Well, the first time was the day the Daily Planet was bombed... MRS. COX: I was no where near Superman that day. So, just some light makeup, huh? Not quite. Awww…she’s trying to go for his power.
BETSY: Wrong TV show. Who sucks peoples power out from their mouth? Why lead him on, renew his hope, and then kill him like this? LEX: /Because she's perfect/ LOIS: Uh... I plead the 5th... and being elsewhere. There was no sense in adding cruelty to another person’s death. LEX: /What would be the point otherwise?/ That sounds about right. No, I think they’re transparent. No, Mrs. Cox gets chilly. She's dressed like it's December after Lois and Clark closed down the nuclear reactor. So, are they allowed to shoot home invaders in New Troy or do people have to call the police? Shoot, yes. Hold them hostage and torture them, not so much. CLARK: /coughing/ Good Samaritan laws. Radiation sickness from wearing a radioactive rock around her neck? Nope, but she might get cancer in a few years. MRS. COX: Say, what? Yeah, she’s melting, all right. They really should not hand out Kryptonite to just about anybody. Also, you are doing a reference when they used Chip as a Lex stand-in, huh? Ding! Ding! Ding! Get that man a bright green necklace! /Lois is the alien from MIB/ LOIS: I do NOT look like that! ER: /jawdrop/ Now…WAY! /thud/ Gee. I must be getting predictable. Note to self: go off script for the next section of the story. On the downside: Getting it on with a creep? MRS COX: Eh. Win some, lose some. Get lots of money. Oh boy…he’s going to be a mess during their first time together! CLARK: LOIS: First? CLARK: /totally thinking of something else/ Yeah, let’s call it that… LOIS: /pouting/ you don't like my kissy-poos? He does have kind of sticky fingers, doesn’t he? LOIS: Plus, Lex has cooties! LEX: Uh-uh! I've been tested! Oooh! Lois nude in a room with some random dude. SUPERMAN: kill me. Kill me know. LEX: okay. SUPERMAN: No! I didn't mean... LOIS:  LEX: What? He asked me to! Lex arranged for her to have a bachelorette outing after all! LOIS: If I end up naked in a vat of green jello with Bubbles, someone is going to die. LEX: So much for my night. And we go off to lala land… Yes, I'm sure there are plenty of people in LA who would rub down Lois's naked body. LOIS: That's not what I meant! CLARK: That some strange random dude should rub my naked body? LEX: Don't worry, darling, I've got Superman's spa day all scheduled over at Lex Towers. We're making a night of it! Maybe it’s a spa with benefits and Lois gets to break the story? LOIS:  So, up to ten days of Lois looking like raw meat?
LOIS: Perfect way to keep Lex’s hands off me! True, but she's planning on running away with Clark that night and the last time he thought she needed to recover... LOIS: Yes, we have to admit, *I'm* the better nurse. It’s even on TV shows back in the 90s. Still scary though. Well…it will happen during her happy day, so… What? No morning sickness jokes at the mention of nausea? Dylan sounds like the concubine mistress from Teeej!’s Care and Training, making sure the concubine is all ready to receive her First Lord. Really? I was trying to make her sound like an ordinary masseuse. CLARK: So, let me get this straight. Lois is getting pampered while I’m getting beaten? Really? Rewrite! Rewrite, over here! LOIS: But I've had to spend the last few months dating Lex. I deserve this after all my sacrifices. CLARK: What sacrifices? LOIS: Well, not spending time with you, for one... CLARK: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/liebe/s045.gif) When you put it that way, I guess I could suffer a little longer. LOIS: Ooops? Was I not supposed to stick that steak knife into my husband’s ribcage? LEX: Darling, my ribcage is about 12" higher. Lex vanquished Tempus? I thought that that feat was accomplished by the man himself? How could Tempus take Lois away from Lex? Cameras in the massage parlor? Hmmmm. That would have been a different take. SUPERMAN: You want me to watch a naked Lois being rubbed down by another woman? Okay. Got popcorn? BILL HENDERSON: /picking up the phone/ Ye-?
LOIS: /loud, unintelligible screeching/
BILL: What? Lois? What’s going on? Slow down… Okay, I won't make it THAT easy. CLARK: It's okay. You can make it THAT easy. Huh. Looks like he’s found a double and is making use of his TV studio apartment. No, wait, she knows she’s being watched and makes the appropriate face for the cameras. Duh! Yes, one of those. LOIS: /to the audience/ Zofran. You need some in every spy’s household. CLARK: You could just try NOT kissing the guy. Yes. That he knows of. That too. So…you said no clones. So…the double Ari dug up? Arianna had no part in making a double of Lois in this story. Lex! /bad boy!/ This is no way to treat a lady.
LEX: Of the night. Yes, it is. Lois is a lady of the night? LEX: I've got the receipt to prove it. /Actually, he doesn't. The Metro Club doesn't issue receipts for large cash donations./ So, Lex figured that maybe Superman might not make it to the morrow, or Lois might be a tad more unreceptive, so he put up a special show? Or did he find a new formula for Revenge and had it massaged into Lois? You mean one which makes her think that Lex is Superman? Is that why he kept the sound off? ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a015.gif) Last chance before she says no to him at the altar? LOIS: You've got me. I didn't really want to marry Lex and have all that money at my disposal. I just wanted to have sex with him, but he never offered me that, so I just accepted his wedding proposal... LEX: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a050.gif) /tried to find photo of Lex Luthor (any of them) doing a face palm. Apparently, Batman does more face palms that this guy./ How Lex really became rich. LOIS: I didn't pay Lex to do that! Because she’s not screaming? Plus, her voice is a tad immature? Like a 5-day-old frog’s? Just in case she asks him again to stop calling her 'Lois'. LEX: Why I always call all women 'darling'. No mix up on the sex tape. Unfortunately, he hasn’t seen her naked yet, that he remembers. So, will he get a strange sense of ‘that’s not right’ when he sees her naked upper body?  Ooooh! Will Clark notice the missing bullet scar? ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/e015.gif) Still 'no comment'. You mean, end it at this point? /wildguy/ You said that the WHAM would be for Clark seeing things in Lex’s office. /wildguy/ You’re a trickster! Well, I couldn't ruin the surprise. Anyway, having Lex just torturing Superman physically with green Kryptonite is old hat. Time to post the new part! Thanks for playing!
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Yes. And, well, no. He did date Lana. peep
LANA: What is she talking about? I don't cook. CLARK: But... but... but... she was right there! /turns to Lois/ But I'm lusting after yours.
LOIS: /giggles/ Oh, Clark. Stop it! Oooh! Zombie-Clark! LOIS: Does the ER imply that one must be dead to want me? Who sucks peoples power out from their mouth? One of the Friday-shows on NBC? CLARK: /coughing/ Good Samaritan laws. Don’t shoot the home invader if he’s wearing a red cross? [img] http://tinyurl.com/p9jjjup[/img] Nope, but she might get cancer in a few years.
MRS. COX: Say, what? LEX: Don’t worry about what the EW is saying. You’ll be long dead before any cancer shows up. Quote:
/Lois is the alien from MIB/
LOIS: I do NOT look like that! So… ![[Linked Image]](http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20131206132308/men-in-black/images/thumb/f/f8/Screen_Shot_2013-12-06_at_2.22.12_PM.png/320px-Screen_Shot_2013-12-06_at_2.22.12_PM.png) Quote:
Oh boy…he’s going to be a mess during their first time together!
CLARK:
LOIS: First? That he knows of? Quote:
Lex arranged for her to have a bachelorette outing after all!
LOIS: If I end up naked in a vat of green jello with Bubbles, someone is going to die.
LEX: So much for my night. CLARK: That some strange random dude should rub my naked body?
LEX: Don't worry, darling, I've got Superman's spa day all scheduled over at Lex Towers. We're making a night of it! Quote:
Maybe it’s a spa with benefits and Lois gets to break the story?
LOIS: /hungers for *any* kind of story/ See? I knew that eventually her penchant for hooking in unlikely places would come in handy. Quote:
Well…it will happen during her happy day, so…
What? No morning sickness jokes at the mention of nausea? Why would there be morning sickness. You said that Lois is not pregnant. That it’s all just made up. And that you wouldn’t confirm her pregnancy until people stopped suggesting she is pregnant. Really? I was trying to make her sound like an ordinary masseuse. Yeah…it’s just the whole atmosphere, plus naked Lois and Clark in an inconvenienced position  CLARK: /put on a lot of morphine/ When you put it that way, I guess I could suffer a little longer. Quote:
LOIS: Ooops? Was I not supposed to stick that steak knife into my husband’s ribcage?
LEX: Darling, my ribcage is about 12" higher. So…she missed his heart then? LOIS: No, I went for his most vital organ. How could Tempus take Lois away from Lex? ![[Linked Image]](http://lncphoto.free.fr/LCscreencaps/S3/3x14/imgcol/_00068.jpg) For instance… SUPERMAN: You want me to watch a naked Lois being rubbed down by another woman? Okay. Got popcorn? MARTHA: Clark Jerome Superman Kent! CLARK: /is looking for the easy way out/ It's okay. You can make it THAT easy. So, he wants an easy Lois? CLARK: You could just try NOT kissing the guy. FLOIS: But but but he’s *LEX* Luthor! Quote:
So…you said no clones. So…the double Ari dug up?
Arianna had no part in making a double of Lois in this story. That was not what the nice ER had asked.  LEX: I've got the receipt to prove it.
/Actually, he doesn't. The Metro Club doesn't issue receipts for large cash donations./ You mean one which makes her think that Lex is Superman? Is that why he kept the sound off? Yeah, right. LOIS: That’s no Superman! That’s barely even a man LEX: /tried to find photo of Lex Luthor (any of them) doing a face palm. Apparently, Batman does more face palms that this guy./ Just in case she asks him again to stop calling her 'Lois'. Yeah, because having her plastically altered wouldn’t raise any suspicions with her. Well, I couldn't ruin the surprise. Anyway, having Lex just torturing Superman physically with green Kryptonite is old hat. CLARK: I…I…I *like* old things. LOIS: LANA: Like old girlfriends? LOIS: Playing's fun! Michael
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
CLARK: But... but... but... she was right there! /turns to Lois/ But I'm lusting after yours.
LOIS: /giggles/ Oh, Clark. Stop it!
ER: Oooh! Zombie-Clark!
LOIS: Does the ER imply that one must be dead to want me? ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d015.gif) /I don't like the new laughing smilie on the boards, too creepy./ LEX: Define "dead". One of the Friday-shows on NBC? I don't pay for live TV anymore, so I have no idea to whom you might be referring. EW: Nope, but she might get cancer in a few years.
MRS. COX: Say, what?
LEX: Don’t worry about what the EW is saying. You’ll be long dead before any cancer shows up. MRS. COX: Check, please! I need to call my lawyer. LEX: Silly woman. I own all the lawyers in town. /Lois is the alien from MIB/
LOIS: I do NOT look like that!
ER: So… /pregnant brunette woman from MIB, who looks a bit like a semi-naked Lois/ LOIS: Okay, I *do* look like that, but that's not *me*. CLARK: Not, yet. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/g042.gif) LOIS: Really not earning yourself points with that remark, Flyboy. /Also, is it just me or does that woman seem to be standing in the park where Buffy often was filmed? I thought it was a photo from that show, but couldn't remember that happening. SPIKE: I swear I didn't know it was possible!/ ER: Oh boy…he’s going to be a mess during their first time together!
CLARK:
LOIS: First?
ER: That he knows of? ER: Maybe it’s a spa with benefits and Lois gets to break the story?
LOIS: /hungers for *any* kind of story/
ER: See? I knew that eventually her penchant for hooking in unlikely places would come in handy. LOIS: Hooking? Hooking? I think you have me confused with a former gossip columnist. CAT: I didn't "hook". I was always free. MEN OF METROPOLIS: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d035.gif) And we loved her for it! PHIL: I really didn't need to hear this. ER: Well…it will happen during her happy day, so…
EW: What? No morning sickness jokes at the mention of nausea?
ER: Why would there be morning sickness. You said that Lois is not pregnant. That it’s all just made up. And that you wouldn’t confirm her pregnancy until people stopped suggesting she is pregnant. And you believed me?  I mean, yeah, that's right. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d060.gif) EW: Really? I was trying to make her sound like an ordinary masseuse.
ER: Yeah…it’s just the whole atmosphere, plus naked Lois and Clark in an inconvenienced position CLARK: I am *not* naked. Thank you very much. LOIS: I'm not all the way naked. CLARK: /gaining strength to fight the Kryptonite from this thought/ LOIS: Ooops? Was I not supposed to stick that steak knife into my husband’s ribcage?
LEX: Darling, my ribcage is about 12" higher.
ER: So…she missed his heart then? LEX: Define "heart". LOIS: No, I went for his most vital organ. What Lex THINKS is his most vital organ. EW: How could Tempus take Lois away from Lex?
ER: /reminds EW about what Tempus is accused of doing to Alt-Lois in Tempus Anyone?/ For instance… Or do you mean, that canon Lois was taken from canon Clark? Also, Tempus had nothing to do with Alt-Lois's death in this story. SUPERMAN: You want me to watch a naked Lois being rubbed down by another woman? Okay. Got popcorn?
MARTHA: Clark Jerome Superman Kent! CLARK: What? I'm locked in a cage. What do you want me to do? Suffer? CLARK: /is looking for the easy way out/ It's okay. You can make it THAT easy.
ER: So, he wants an easy Lois? Where's the fun in that? CLARK: Duh! CLARK: You could just try NOT kissing the guy.
FLOIS: But but but he’s *LEX* Luthor! FLOIS = Fake Lois, I presume. So, she's not a smartest cookie in the jar. ER: So…you said no clones. So…the double Ari dug up?
EW: Arianna had no part in making a double of Lois in this story.
ER: That was not what the nice ER had asked. No? Hmmmm. EW: You mean one which makes her think that Lex is Superman? Is that why he kept the sound off?
ER: Yeah, right.
LOIS: That’s no Superman! That’s barely even a man EW: Just in case she asks him again to stop calling her 'Lois'.
ER: Yeah, because having her plastically altered wouldn’t raise any suspicions with her. LEX: What she don't know won't hurt her. EW: Well, I couldn't ruin the surprise. Anyway, having Lex just torturing Superman physically with green Kryptonite is old hat.
CLARK: I…I…I *like* old things.
LOIS: /takes offense at being referred to as old before hitting 29/
LANA: Like old girlfriends?
LOIS: /doesn't know who punch first. Clark or his ex./ But Clark didn't date the Lana of this dimension. I agree!
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28 |
Bald. With a decided lack of vigor. Quote:
One of the Friday-shows on NBC?
I don't pay for live TV anymore, so I have no idea to whom you might be referring. Grimm. Just finished Season Three. MRS. COX: Check, please! I need to call my lawyer.
LEX: Silly woman. I own all the lawyers in town. LOIS: See? I knew the blonde bitca was bought. ER: So… /pregnant brunette woman from MIB, who looks a bit like a semi-naked Lois/ Actually, that’s her dinner in her belly not a kid. I mean, she didn’t eat a kid. She ate a grown up. LOIS: Okay, I *do* look like that, but that's not *me*.
CLARK: Not, yet. <thinks he’s scored a goal> /Also, is it just me or does that woman seem to be standing in the park where Buffy often was filmed? I thought it was a photo from that show, but couldn't remember that happening. I only always recognize the mountain formation from Roswell. Am not that good with dark trees. SPIKE: I swear I didn't know it was possible!/ ANGEL: Neither did I! DARLA: Oh, shut it! PHIL: I really didn't need to hear this. LOIS: I'm not all the way naked.
CLARK: /gaining strength to fight the Kryptonite from this thought/ So…he’s actually much stronger thinking of a not-naked Lois? Quote:
LOIS: No, I went for his most vital organ.
What Lex THINKS is his most vital organ. Or do you mean, that canon Lois was taken from canon Clark? Also, Tempus had nothing to do with Alt-Lois's death in this story. General kidnapping of random Loises. ER: So, he wants an easy Lois?
Where's the fun in that?
CLARK: Duh! FLOIS = Fake Lois, I presume.
So, she's not a smartest cookie in the jar. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/verschiedene/c050.gif) LOIS: That’s no Superman! That’s barely even a man
<EW is casually amused by quip>  But Clark didn't date the Lana of this dimension. And you think a jealous Lois cares about technicalities? Michael
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
Bald. With a decided lack of vigor. CLARK: Yeah! I can't die because I have a full head of hair. LOIS: /eyes Tank warily/ Um... Grimm. Just finished Season Three. Never heard of it. LOIS: See? I knew the blonde bitca was bought. MAYSON: DA's aren't Lawyers in that sense of the word. LOIS: Really, she's writing that dialogue herself. Actually, that’s her dinner in her belly not a kid. I mean, she didn’t eat a kid. She ate a grown up. It's been a while since I saw that one. I only always recognize the mountain formation from Roswell. Am not that good with dark trees. I meant the "graveyard" from Buffy. They showed THAT quite a bit. SPIKE: I swear I didn't know it was possible!
ANGEL: Neither did I!
DARLA: Oh, shut it! Well, she did seduce him, didn't she? So…he’s actually much stronger thinking of a not-naked Lois? CLARK: Her modesty becomes her. LOIS: Super heroes are a strange lot. And you think a jealous Lois cares about technicalities? CLARK: I don't have that such luck.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28 |
CLARK: Yeah! I can't die because I have a full head of hair.
LOIS: /eyes Tank warily/ Um... /Tank has renamed himself ‘Delilah’/ ER: LOIS: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/c075.gif) Quote:
LOIS: See? I knew the blonde bitca was bought.
MAYSON: DA's aren't Lawyers in that sense of the word.
LOIS: clap Really, she's writing that dialogue herself. So…Lois is happy with the EW, then? Say, did you allow her to get some nookie after her wedding to Lex and neglected to tell us yet? ![[Linked Image]](http://expert2.be/smilie/pix/tapfoot.gif) Quote:
I only always recognize the mountain formation from Roswell. Am not that good with dark trees.
I meant the "graveyard" from Buffy. They showed THAT quite a bit. They did…Hmm… Trees and parks are just a tad less memorable In other news: Woman abducted into thin air while her boyfriend proposed in front of fountain in Metropolis, Illinois. Fiancé: “And he…that guy, he came out of some shining portal and he…he…*grabbed* her!” Police his looking for a man in his late 30s, early 40s, reddish-brown hair and a full beard. He is said to wear an aluminum vest and two guns. Meanwhile, in another dimension… TEMPUS: What do you mean by ‘I am not Lois Lane’? Well, she did seduce him, didn't she? Yeah… on an unrelated note…I probably should watch those disks again… CLARK: Her modesty becomes her.
LOIS: Super heroes are a strange lot. Also, funny how ‘strength’ can refer simply to self-control :p Quote:
And you think a jealous Lois cares about technicalities?
CLARK: I don't have that such luck. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/g025.gif) Maybe he should look for an easier girlfriend? MAYSON: LOIS: Well…she *is* easy. Michael
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
So…Lois is happy with the EW, then? Say, did you allow her to get some nookie after her wedding to Lex and neglected to tell us yet? Will Lois get nookie after her wedding day with Lex passes? Yes! Lois will have sex (or make love... one of the two) between the date of her and Lex's wedding and before she dies. Oh, sorry. Is that a spoiler? In other news: Woman abducted into thin air while her boyfriend proposed in front of fountain in Metropolis, Illinois. Fiancé: “And he…that guy, he came out of some shining portal and he…he…*grabbed* her!” Police his looking for a man in his late 30s, early 40s, reddish-brown hair and a full beard. He is said to wear an aluminum vest and two guns.
Meanwhile, in another dimension…
TEMPUS: What do you mean by ‘I am not Lois Lane’? And you think a jealous Lois cares about technicalities? CLARK: I don't have that such luck. ER: Maybe he should look for an easier girlfriend? MAYSON: LOIS: Well…she *is* easy. CLARK: I agree. Where's the fun in that? JIMMY: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/e045.gif) CLARK: Nah. I'll still with Lois. I prefer a challenge.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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