Lois & Clark Forums Forums General Discussion Lois & Clark Caption Competition New Game -3

I loved them all (carol, gr8shades, Paul, CatherineBruce)

Ooh, me?? Eek! I mean, thanks!

And this picture looks captionable, I think

Lois Lane. Going where no reporter has gone before.
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Lois, I'm fine! Just because they're green doesn't mean they're made of kryptonite.

~Anna

ETA: When I first saw the cap, I thought it looked kinda like her finger was up his nose. Now that I look at it again, I see she's just pulling a cigarette out of his mouth, but since it's funnier to think of her finger in his nose, I'll leave my captions. *g*

LL - (to man in the elevator) - A shining head and long tooth! Are you an alien?

CK - (to LL) - Umm... Lois... I think his baldness is the shine and that long tooth's a cigarette! And... as for being an alien... he isn't! Trust me I'm sure! Because, you see, I have first hand knowledge of aliens!

Lois: Hey, Clark, have you heard of this? They have these new dummies for the elevators that do magic tricks. See, I can pull this noodle out of his mouth and...

"Wow! This super speed thing is amazing! It's like everyone else is frozen! And I can just reach out and touch them and they'll probably never even feel it..."

"Well, they might feel something..."

"Like a little tickle or something? Hee! Tickle your mustache! Hey, I bet I can get this guy to sneeze, and he'll never know why! Tickle, tickle!"

"Remind me why I gave you super powers...?"

"So that we could be 'together' without having to use --"

"Oh, right. Never remind me of that again. ... Ow."

Lois: Well, would you look at that! It’s the forgotten Dwarfs eight through ten - Ugly, Smokey and Baldy - all rolled into one!

Clark: Lo-is!

Lois: You know, with a moustache like that you could play the lead role in Magnum PI: The Sunset Years.

Clark: Lois, give the guy a break.

Lois: Hey, maybe Dan could lend you one of his shirts.

Clark: Lois...

Lois: Ooh, or Captain Hook. You could stick your fingers in your ears like in the movie and use the wax to twirl the ends into little points.

Clark: Lois!

Lois: Or maybe Hercule Poirot, with his 'little gray cells'...

Oh boy! DO I HAFTA choose?? Many of these made me giggle!

Well... okay. Oh, hard to choose!! (Stop being so good, you guys makes it difficult for people to choose! (And I'm just kidding... Keep making me giggle!))

HatMan you win, because you almost made me spew something out my nose. Again.

(And ow!!!)

Me? Yay! (Sorry about the choking hazard, though...)

But... oh, crumb. That means I have to actually find a new pic.

Right, then. Give me a minute.

Or two.

Or...

Hmm, okay. What about this one?



(With thanks to LoisAndClarkArchive.com)

Pfff, I should be used to it

This turned out slightly longer than I expected O.o

Lois: So... all this happened?
Superman: Right.
Lois: Because of... what exactly, again?
Superman: I tripped.
Lois: You. You... tripped?
Superman: Right.
Lois: How can you trip?
Superman: I was trying to avoid the cat.
Lois: And the cat was in the street?
Superman: No, the cat was in a tree.
Lois: Why did you have to avoid the cat in the tree?
Superman: It was in my landing vector.
Lois: So... you avoided the cat by crashing into cars?
Superman: No, I avoided the cat by doing a barrel roll.
Lois: And then you hit the cars?
Superman: No, then I hit the pavement and slipped on some marbles.
Lois: Were the marbles just lying there?
Superman: No, the kid lost his marbles.
Lois: *mutters* YOU lost your marbles...
Superman: What, dear?
Lois: Nothing! ...so, you avoided the cat and slipped on some marbles and THEN landed in the street?
Superman: No, after the marbles I stumbled around the dog.
Lois: A cat AND a dog... oye. So, you avoided the cat, slipped on some marbles, stumbled around the dog, and THEN you crashed into the cars?
Superman: No, after the dog I crashed into the cart.
Lois: What cart?
Superman: The hot dog cart.
Lois: ...Why don't you just tell me the order of events so we can write up the article and go home.
Superman: You're not going to WRITE about this, ARE you?
Lois: Of course, dear.
Superman: Why??
Lois: We report the news.
Superman: This isn't news! It's embarrassing!
Lois: That's what makes it news.
Superman: But-
Lois: The story.
Superman: But-
Lois: Now, dear, I don't have all day.
Superman: But-
Lois: You'll go a week without dessert.
Superman: FINE!
Lois: Good boy.
Superman: After the hot dog cart, it rolled down the sidewalk, and I tried to stop it. I then tripped over... [half an hour later] ...and then the balloon vendor got involved, the child was still crying about dropping her ice cream, and the mother was so mad that she maced me.
Lois: *head jerks up from doze* Then what happened, dear?
Superman: I sneezed.
Lois: ...You sneezed.
Superman: Right.
Lois: Let me guess. After you sneezed, a meteor came down and crashed into some random thing that just so happens to go along with this Purple Passion tale, right?
Superman: Don't be silly, Honey.
Lois: I'm the silly one?
Superman: Of course not, my Darlingest Dear. You are the epitome of seriousness.
Lois: Good save.
Superman: I thought so.
Lois: So what happened after the sneeze?
Superman: ...The pile-up, of course.
Lois: WHAT? But you said you tripped!
Superman: Well, yeah, that's what started this whole thing.
Lois: What? Why didn't you just say you sneezed in the first place?
Superman: You wanted stuff for your article.
Lois: What article?
Superman: ...The one you're going to write about this whole thing.
Lois: Oh right, I forgot about that...
Superman: Lo-is!
Lois: Well, you just kept going on about it. Wait... You mean to tell me that one sneeze caused all of THAT?
Superman: No no, you see, first the Lexus careened into the fire hydrant, then the nuns... [and he continues from there!]

*collapses onto the ground*

Lois: Shouldn't you be there to help them with the wreck?

Superman: Oh! That's not a wreck... just some overgrown kids playing life-size robotic car-wars!

CK: Somehow I don’t think prayer is gonna get them out of this one.

LL: Careful Clark, you could get smited for saying something like that.

CK: Lois, "smited" isn't a word.

LL: Sure it is! I just used it in a sentence.

CK: No it’s not.

LL: All right, fine! What then, "smitten"?

CK: Baby, I’m already smitten.

LL: (rolls eyes) Hey, do they look a little handsy to you?

CK: Lois, "handsy" isn't a word either.

LL: Oh, shut it Nerdboy!

Lois: This is supposed to be art?

Superman: Sure, the artist calls it 'two cars, two nuns.'

Lois: That's original.

Lois: I didn't know Britney was in Metropolis.

(sorry if that's mean )

I thought this was supposed to be a peaceful protest. There has to be a better way than blocking traffic to point out the inherent dangers in speed bumps.

Clark: "Don't even think of joining them! You're *my* bride."

Lois: Wow Superman! What happened?

Superman: Sister Mary Ellie Fant got some of my superpowers in a lightening strike the other night so now when she yells "SHUT UP!!" it causes an earthquake.


(you'll have to have heard Cheech and Chong at one point to know this reference )


TEEEEEEJ

Boy, this is tough...

But, all else being equal, I try to avoid tagbacks (though that was quite an effort!). And if it's mean (but funny!) to make a caption picking on Brittney, then it's probably even more mean to pick it as the winner. And... I'll spare you the rest.

lisime, I liked yours. And, as it happens, it reminds me of a certain very odd "sculpture" prominently on display in Sarasota (where I spent some time not too long ago), which just makes it that much better. So... Lisa, you're up!

Sorry I'm not Lisa, but her caption reminds me of a movie I saw way back when, That Sinking Feeling. Four unemployed Scottish lads steal some stainless steel sinks(!), and now they just need to find a buyer for their loot! Well, they put down the heavy sinks on the pavement, stacking them on top of each other. An art dealer happens by and calls the tower of sinks an installation! He buys the stolen sinks for a couple of thousand pounds! It was really funny, because it was so crazy....

Ann