Sara!! I can’t tell you how happy I am that you are posting again. You know how much I love this story. I have certainly been missing it over the last couple of months, so when I saw the new part today I almost squealed in excitement.
Anyway, on with the comments:
But he knew now. Oh, yes. They didn't work. Hadn't worked. He could still feel the scalpels, forceps, needles... all of which may as well have been more bullets. He could still feel a phantom knife digging for the bullet. Pushing and ripping. Muscle and flesh. He'd screamed, yelled, managed to crush the metal side rail they'd let him hang on to with his left hand before he'd passed out from the pain.
I get the impression that you indulged your inner sadist with this passage.
It was very vivid and very powerful. I could almost feel some of Clark’s pain myself while reading this part.
What if it'd just been too much? What if there was a limit to how much he could handle before his powers just didn't come back at all? What if...
See aforementioned sadist comment. However, you did have some very nice passages as well.
"S-sun," he stammered instead of nodding. "I need sunlight."
"I guess I sorta miss the sun, too," she commented as she drew the blinds open to let in the early morning sun. She continued, her voice quiet, almost distant. "You don't even realize you miss it until you've been away from it too long."
The rays began to soak in. An inner warmth rushed through him, a slight tingling that left him lightheaded, as if he'd stood too quickly. She was right; he hadn't realized how much he'd needed the sun until he'd been deprived of it.
These lines are so great because they not only describe the literal healing effects of the sun, but the metaphorical ones as well. Finally, after so much suffering Lois and Clark are not “away from the sun” anymore. Together, their lives are no longer dark and bleak. Sappy as it sounds, they are each other’s “suns” metaphorically speaking. It is such a good metaphor and a lovely tie-in to the title of the story. How delightfully English major of you.
I can’t wait until Saturday to read the next part!
-Em
P.S. I’ll believe 34 parts when I see it.
