I really like this story. It's wonderfully sexy. I like how, even though you follow the show fairly closely, you have added detail and story that keep it interesting, so that it's not just a re-hash of the episodes.
I really like the argument between Lois and Clark in the newsroom that leads to their discussion on the roof. Lois is completely apoplectic, while Clark is utterly puzzled at why she's upset. Throwing her over his shoulder is pretty heavy-handed, and it wouldn't fly in a real office situation, but it's so in-character for the show. I love how the next day everyone is expecting their fight to continue, rather explosively, but they both walk in like everything's fine.
