Sara, I've just gotten caught up with this entire story and have been, quite literally, blown away. I love your writing style, and the tug-of-war of emotion just radiates from the page! Your characterization of Clark is just heart-breaking (in the best way possible), and Lois is spot-on. I can't express how much I've enjoyed this story!
And this part! Oh, man ...
She wasn't sure what she felt. Angry? Relieved? Numb. Everything was so muted, surreal, and she was frozen to the spot as she watched two paramedics heft Clark onto a stretcher. His shoulder had been bandaged; she didn't know when. He'd been shot.
No. *She* had been shot... shot at. And Clark had taken the bullet for her.
The paramedics started wheeling him away, and suddenly everything snapped back into place. The sounds, the smells, the pain all flooded back, rushing in on her senses. They were taking Clark away.
Lois tried to yell for them to wait, but her throat was hoarse and it didn't come out as more than a squeak. She scrambled to her feet and started to rush after them, but a something stopped her. A hand on her shoulder. Not forceful, but it was startling and she stopped.
This is brilliant. It conveys first-hand the confusion, the effects of the shock Lois must be feeling -- such terrific writing!
And:
"Gunshot wound."
"Got a name or is this a John Doe?"
"It's Superman."
"Whoa. Superman? But he looks so slo-"
"His name is Clark Kent." Lois sounded tense, distraught.
"Same thing, lady."
"No, it's not. His name is Clark Kent."
*loves* Perfect. Just perfect -- an indignant, protective Lois, just when Clark needs her most (even if he doesn't realize it).
In all, a beautifully told story, Sara. Can't wait to read more from you!
