Wow - this thread is all over the place. However, I'll stick to one small part of it.
Do men think about finding the solution more than they dwell on the emotions?
Any men (in particular) out there who would care to enlighten me?
I can't say for sure, but men probably do think a lot. They just don't verbalize about it. I'll be anxious to see if any of the fellas post here.
Personally, I think a lot, but don't verbalize it very much at all. Which has led to more "disagreements" with my wife than I care to admit to. I'm a worrier. All day long, my mind is chewing on all kinds of things. How long is our tired, vernerable mini-van going to last? Where will I find the money to replace it if it decides to go belly-up? How do I teach my youngest one to quit being such a drama-queen? Is my oldest one ever going to be able to overcome her Sensory Integration problems enough to live a "normal" life, or will I have to be her filter and buffer her whole life? How much money is left in the checking account, and how many days till pay day? <THAT MANY?! - worry - worry - worry...> My wife's birthday is coming up, and she keeps telling me I don't need to get her anything, but I know from past experience, I'd better get her something... The laundry basket looked like it was getting a bit full, but it's only the middle of the week - could we really have filled it that quickly? What in the world are we going to eat for supper tonight since we have X number of places to be in Y number of hours, not counting homework, getting the kids a bath and a snack, spending SOME quality time with them...
It's just a constant running commentary in the background. Yes, I spend a lot of time trying to find solutions to things I think of as "problems." Right or wrong, my thinking is, "I'm the man of the household. I'm supposed to be the provider and problem solver. I'm supposed to be the one who knows what to do."
Since I don't verbalize it much - if any - my wife often thinks I don't think about anything but my work, and when the next meal is.
Anyway - probably more than I should have said, but once I got to typing, I couldn't stop.
