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Missing Lois - TOC

A taste from the next installment:

Quote
Lois opened the paper. The photo on the front page of the Daily Planet was Clark bent over a grave, drenched in rain. He looked like he had lost his best friend. The headline read Lois Lane Funeral Held Today . She swallowed as her hands began to shake. Quickly, she scanned the article. Lois Lane and child died due to complications during childbirth. Clark Kent arrived back in town that day, just in time for the funeral. He knew nothing about Lois, her condition or the baby. The article was written by Perry White and she could tell he did not believe Clark’s protestations, “She never said a word.” Even the photo of despondent Clark was taken by Jimmy Olsen.

“No one in Metropolis believes his story. He not only loses you, but all his friends and his job. He returns to Kansas, Ms. Lane, a broken man. He takes over his father’s farm and never leaves Smallville, again. That is a photo of the death of Superman.”

Tears dripped down her cheek. “He would never forgive himself if something happened to me while he was gone.”

“No, he does not.”

“Is this true? What Perry writes about what happened to us? About what they did?”

Mr. Wells looked away, unable to look her in the eye. She swallowed. It was true. She felt ashamed for human race, to have done something so wrong… And to a baby… her baby… their baby… to her. Clark would never forgive the people of Earth for this.

“And did his father really…?” She looked at Mr. Wells. Not Jonathon as well.

“After he heard about what Bureau Thirty-Nine did to you, he had a heart attack, yes.”

Lois closed her eyes, her heart breaking, a tear dripped down her cheek. It was her fault. Her death would crush Clark Kent and kill Superman. But if she went back in time and stopped that night… she placed a hand on her stomach. She couldn’t do it. There had to be another way. She needed time to think. Lois pulled herself together and wiped her eyes.
I just wanted to reprint my Author's Note from the first section, in case anyone missed it...

Author’s note: This mostly romance storyline takes place concurrently with the entire fourth season, explains who the baby is, where it came from, what happens after the season 4 finale, as well as the alternate dimension's Clark's search and discovery his Lois.

Since my story is so long (10 parts, approx. 50K words each), I’d love any feedback regarding superfluous scenes, whether I should break it into smaller installments, and make sure it stays within or below the TV-13 rating.

As I mentioned above in my disclaimer, the story starts out with a scene lifted directly from Season Three; I find it flows better with the scene included, but if this violates LCMB rules, please let me know and I’ll remove it.

This is the first time I have posted a story to the message boards and I apologize for any errors made while posting these first few installments.

I have written (i.e. completed) 9 out of the 10 Chapters of the Missing Lois story and will try to post an installment every 2 to 3 days as interest allows (If that's not fast enough, let me know...)

Last edited by VirginiaR; 12/03/14 08:23 PM. Reason: Fixed broken Links

VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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First of all, welcome to the boards! This is a really friendly community and we all love new authors-- it gives us new stories to read and helps fuel our own creative juices!

Love the start of your story! I'm guessing you are blending the curse mentioned in Soul Mates since they consummated earlier than they should have? But honestly, your depiction of Big Girls Don't Fly is much more accurate. It always seemed to me in that scene that more happened than just a few kisses. wink

You are spot on with the characterizations and I love the touches of humor you've put in the fic, even when dealing with heavy drama.

One little nitpick on presentation-- Most authors use some sort of marker to divide sections of a chapter like **** or something instead of extra space. It just helps for readability and clarification of different sections.

Looking forward to more of your fic! hyper


Reach for the moon, for even if you fail, you'll still land among the stars... and who knows? Maybe you'll meet Superman along the way. wink
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Alright, I'm in. :-) Very interesting beginning. I'm interested on where this is going and how you'll tie in Alt Clark. Welcome to the boards!!


I heart Clark Kent.
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Welcome to the boards, Virginia. You've got an interesting premise here, and from your author's notes, it sounds like there are going to be a lot of twists and turns. I can tell from this first chapter that you have a lot of writing talent (and perhaps experience in other fandoms? This doesn't read like a very first attempt. smile ) and I'm looking forward to seeing where you're taking it.

I'm always a bit hesitant on stories where Wells comes by to "undo" a pregnancy like this, because it puts Lois in an impossible position -- she is essentially forced to choose between her life (or Clark's) and that of their child. This is certainly a decision no parent should ever be asked to make. But I'm guessing Wells showed us the newspaper report that both Lois and the baby die as a way of proving to Lois that she's not "risking" the baby's life because the baby isn't going to make it anyway. And that's all kinds of tragic, isn't it?

But I'm guessing, again from your notes, that Lois and Clark will ultimately be reunited with their child thumbsup and I'm always up for seeing a happy ending for Alt-Clark, so I say bring it on!

Oh, and you haven't done anything wrong as far as using a scene from the show, etc. We don't have any rules against that on the boards as long as it's clear you aren't trying to take credit for writing it, etc. (I think most of us know the show well enough to know where a line or scene comes from, though most authors do mention in their notes that they've borrowed here and there.) We're a pretty friendly and welcoming bunch who would much rather nicely point out mistakes and make suggestions rather than jump all over someone. It's one of the reasons these boards are such a great place to hang out. smile

Glad to have you here. smile

Kathy

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Great start! I love the idea of explaining the magically appearing baby. I also love the thought of them consumating their relationship just before he leaves for New Krypton. They might never see each other again. They were fully committed to each other already, even though they weren't technically married. Can't wait to see how you tie all these juicy pieces together.

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Welcome to the boards! smile

I'm in too! The premise that you have set up sounds intriguing and I am looking forward to see where this goes.

I agree with Kathy that this doesn't read like a first attempt - it is very well-written.

Looking forward to more smile1

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Welcome to our sandbox, Virginia!

You had me at "Alt-Clark", but I also enjoyed reading the set-up. I have my suspicions about where you're going to take this, but as I'm usually wrong, I think I'll keep them to myself this time. I'm very interested to see where you actually go. Any idea of your posting schedule?

I was sad to see the newspaper article at the end and horrified at what the real story was behind the official "dying of complications during childbirth" story.

Bureau 39 - blech!
razz

More soon, please.
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Hi Virginia,

Welcome to the message boards!

What a fantastic L&C fanfic debut! I'm hooked and am eager for the next part. smile

Joy,
Lynn

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Welcome, Virginia!

Great start. I'm intrigued. Looking forward to seeing how you work all of this out.

Jackie


Superman: I hear you've been looking for me.
Lois: All my life.
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Welcome, good job and keep it coming. Laura


Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”

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Great start!

"This is photo of the death of Superman" - wow, what a kicker ending!

The hints of Bureau 39 - did they kidnap Lois and do experiments on her and the baby? /shudder/

What's happening to Clark on New Krypton? Are we going to see him at all? Is that important to the fic?

What will Martha say when she finds out?

Excellent dilemma already set up! I can't wait for more.

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Quote
Originally posted by mozartmaid:
One little nitpick on presentation-- Most authors use some sort of marker to divide sections of a chapter like **** or something instead of extra space. It just helps for readability and clarification of different sections.
Thanks for the suggestion; I wondered the best way to note a changing of scene.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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smile1

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“You need to forget this night.”
wave
Michael


Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)

I go by Michael on the Archives.
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Michael: Thank you for even considering to do one of your in-depth commentaries on my Missing Lois story. dance laugh Actually, I think Tempus would approve.

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What a great debut, Virgina! I'm still (since I've already been so, before) looking forward to the rest of this little story of yours.
I'm glad to hear. Although since I started posting in April and it will be November/December-ish, by the time I'm done posting... it will almost feel like a ten-pounder (baby) when I finished.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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I hope you find it worth all the time and effort it will take to read it.
Oh, I'm not worried. So long as Luthor and Co doesn't actually getting to play with Lois I'm good laugh

Quote
Thank you for even considering to do one of your in-depth commentaries on my Missing Lois story.
blush I want to say I can't promise long FDKs for each part, but then, the only thing stopping them would be actually doing to opposite of writing FDK wink /glares at Muse

Quote
I've realized I've been TOO revealing with my spoiling comments in GEM, so I'm going to try to be more careful from now onwards.
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