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#49980 02/24/08 03:14 PM
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 242
smileyd Offline OP
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Posts: 242
As you can see from the title, I vote for this as the title.

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"I have to go pick up my cheese of the month shipment now." He said it to his wife Lois Lane, and in an apparently well practiced way (they have been married for about 4 years) she told him "Ok, honey, be careful and go pick up your cheese."
Sounds very married to me. How long can that excuse stay with them? lol
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My consideration was interrupted by a whooshing sound that I've been told means a superman story is coming in.
By who?
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And it dawned on me that it had occurred just as a tall dark and handsome reporter, who was tough enough to survive working with mad-dog Lane, had hustled out (which had happened immediately following the announcement of a 3 alarm fire). And everything became clear.
ohoh, someones not being so careful with their secrets!
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It was so obvious: "Clark Kent was S-"

Lois appeared at my shoulder. "Judging by your stricken expression and pale color, you just figured it."
such a quick response, that girl. always on her toes. Does this happen often?
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She just revved."
her engine? since when do they allow cars in the newsroom?
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Mr. White walked in with a cardboard box wrapped in dull metal foil and closed the door. He took a sheet of paper out of the box and put it in front of me with a pen.
I'm thinking, why would anyone wrap a box in foil if it wasn't red or green for Christmas?
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"Official Superman's Secret Form."
Did Constance type it up for them?
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"I [print your name] --------- hereby swear never to reveal Superman's secret to those who don't know without appropriate consideration and review; and under no circumstances to those specified to me as restricted. Sign here: "
thats got to be a pretty long list of people who don't know...
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You must never, ever, ever tell..." she paused for dramatic effect, "...Clark Kent.
WHAT? why can't he know?
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"Clark can't deal with what he is and can do. Clark doesn't know he's Superman and Superman doesn't know he's Clark. They are completely separate minds. It's a form of multiple personality disorder."
I see why now, but how did that happen? I'd love to find out.
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"Welcome to the secret."
Sounds like she just joined a secret society, and I guess in a sense, she did!
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I said "Hi, Clark." And I went back to work.
And life will never be the same.

Excellent story!

Desiree


Don't think about the pink elephant... I dare you!

Thanks to Tineke for the avatar
#49981 02/24/08 03:17 PM
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 113
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 113
Cute story! I prefer "Never Tell Clark"--it doesn't give as much away. I like how it seems like the normal LnC universe, up until the *actual* story revelation. Poor Clark! You'd think after a bout with kryptonite, he'd start to wonder. And what's with the tight fitting undershirts with an 'S' on them? lol Anyway, fun read. Thanks!

#49982 02/24/08 03:36 PM
Joined: Aug 2005
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TOC Offline
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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I, too, really enjoyed this story!

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Is the opening too slow?
The opening is not the strongest part of the fic. Sometimes it is better to give the reader a clearer hint, right from the beginning, where this story is going. Maybe you should try to mention Clark's odd behaviour even sooner?

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"Jimmy!" she called. "Give me a hand getting her to the conference room so she can sit down. She just revved."
Wow! Now that is original.

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Revved? I'd revved? What did that mean?
I'm as confused as she is, and I'm certainly intrigued!

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Jimmy bustled over and propped up my other shoulder and they started helping me across the bullpen to the conference room. As we passed his office Mr. White popped out, looking concerned and asked, "What's the matter? Low blood sugar?"

Jimmy fielded it like it was an everyday occurrence, "She's just going through revelation shock. She'll be fine once she sits down a few minutes and we can explain things."
Wow!!!! Priceless! She just revved!! She's going through revelation shock, figuring out that Clark Kent is Superman, like it was an everyday experience at the Daily Planet!!! eek clap

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Next thing I know I'm sitting down in the conference room with my legs propped up, holding a cup of coffee with lots of sugar and with Lois and Jimmy are looking at me. Mr. White walked in with a cardboard box wrapped in dull metal foil and closed the door. He took a sheet of paper out of the box and put it in front of me with a pen.

I read the paper. It's headed, "Official Superman's Secret Form." There's an official form for this?

I read the paper: "I [print your name] --------- hereby swear never to reveal Superman's secret to those who don't know without appropriate consideration and review; and under no circumstances to those specified to me as restricted. Sign here: "
Wow!!! The "revvers" have to sign a form promising never to reveal that Superman is Clark Kent! It is that official!

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"Lex, yeah, don't tell him, but there is someone more important not to be told. You must never, ever, ever tell..." she paused for dramatic effect, "...Clark Kent."
What? What? Don't tell Clark Kent??? eek eek eek

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It was so strange I didn't even see the oddity for a few seconds. "Wait...don't tell Clark that he's... But he IS. What's to tell him?"

Jimmy broke in, "He doesn't know. It's called a fugue state."
My goodness!! Oh, wow!!!

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Lois decided to try to clarify (which was good because it needed a lot of clarifying.) "Clark can't deal with what he is and can do. Clark doesn't know he's Superman and Superman doesn't know he's Clark. They are completely separate minds. It's a form of multiple personality disorder."
I love it!!!

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"The psychologist tells us it is a coping method, sealing off parts that are too hard to deal with. So maybe it should be called Multiple Personality Order, it isn't a disorder, it's a good thing. The problem is that the same psychologist says that if confronted with it, Clark's mind could react in one of two ways: It could fuse the two personalities, that would be a good thing. But it could also cause a complete traumatic breakdown, a very bad thing, he could just collapse. The Psych says it is 50% either way, so we don't dare take the risk of telling him."
Oh wow! (Eh...though I have to chime in with the previous feedbacker... isn't Clark surprised to see his Superman suit under his business suit when he gets undressed at night? And how can he shave, when an ordinary razor can't cut his invulnerable beard?

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Mr. White took the form and put it in the lead lined box, poking at the forms already in there. "It's been a busy month, I'll have to print more copies of the form. See to it, Olsen." Then he turned to me and shook my hand. "Welcome to the secret." And he walked out, just like this was an everyday of the month occurrence.
I love how this "everyday of the month occurrence" echoes of the "cheese of the month shipment".

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A while later Clark came back. I didn't NOT say "Hello, Superman, how was the rescue." I did just what I'm supposed to do. I said "Hi, Clark." And I went back to work.
Small typo here, I think. Two negatives make a positive. It should be "I did NOT say...."

Anyway, this was such a funny, original story! I loved it.

Ann

#49983 02/24/08 03:54 PM
Joined: Apr 2003
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Pulitzer
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I enjoyed this smile .

Very fun!
Carol

#49984 02/24/08 03:57 PM
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Kerth
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rotflol rotflol rotflol rotflol


Framework4
#49985 02/24/08 04:05 PM
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994
Pulitzer
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Oh, I have got to put this one on my short list for nominations for 2008 (YOU HAVE TO SUBMIT THIS TO THE ARCHIVE thumbsup

James


“…with God everything is possible.” Matthew 19:26.


Also read Nan's Terran Underground!
#49986 02/24/08 04:07 PM
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 700
Columnist
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This was so funny! I loved it! And you created a new word, which always impresses me.

I think I'd be fun to see more adventures with this idea. Mercy has some good points that I think would be great in any future stories you might want to write (gentle nudge)

#49987 02/24/08 04:09 PM
Joined: Nov 2003
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Likes: 1
Top Banana
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Super cool premise... thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup


If she had to move heaven and Earth, perhaps come back to haunt Perry and explain the story after they'd killed her, she would do it.

Waking a Miracle by Aria
#49988 02/24/08 04:52 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
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Merriwether
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I love the revelation shock. I love how Lois recognizes that a rev has happened, just by the look on the face. The form is priceless--reminds me of Bureacracy.

I would entitle it Fugue State: Never Tell Clark. It isn't as clear as Multiple Personality Disorder, but it matches your story well. Just my two cents.


Elisabeth

#49989 02/25/08 09:04 AM
Joined: Apr 2007
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Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
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Likes: 28
I believe the "revved" line was the best one in a really funny story.

*Perry, we've got a another one, the the OSS-form laugh *

Michael


Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)

I go by Michael on the Archives.

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