Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: Quiet Regret

Wow, DJ - you had me all upset there when I finished reading. I scrolled back to your disclaimer at the beginning, which I'd skimmed really quickly - looking for what I'd obviously missed:the deathfic warning! Nope - no warning. So scrolled down to your postscript which, being upset I hadn't read - just caught the word "bubbles", the frothy implications of which seemed contrary to the feeling left by your story, and so hadn't read.

Whew! it's an inbetweenie:) And a touching one it is - you're right : we were cheated of that scene by the actual episode. It would have been so good to see your scene added.

Am now betting we'll see a spate of DToSC fics - a parallel to what we did see of Lois's reaction to Clark's death in TOGoM

nicely done:)

c. (moral of the story too - bubbles may be misleading )

At first, I thought this was an alternate TOGOM fic, but then I got to the part about Bad Brain, and knew it was a DTOSC fic.

You wrote Clark's greif so well --great job!

You know, I'd forgotten who Bad Brain was and which ep he was in until I just read Darcy's post. I think all those cartoonish villains are beginning to morph together into one generic Campy Villain. Or it could be that my brain has turned to mush, which is more likely.

Anyway - to repeat, great vignette, DJ

c.

Yeah, that was really ... captivating. It was like I was there with Clark. Unable to help him while all I wanted to do was comfort him.
*sniffles*

Thank you for giving us these missed moments.

Sira

This was very touching and I absolutely agree with you, DJ. Clark's grief wasn't very well transferred in that episode. Thanks for sharing this with us!

Hi,

Like Carol, when I first started reading this, I thought, oh, there was no deathfic warning.

However, as I went a little further, something clued me in on where you were going with this and I could relax and appreciate the emotion.

I expect that we missed out on a lot of these purely emotional moments because of time constraints making an episode. So, it's so good that we have writers who can fill in those missing scenes.

Yours Jenni

I'll be back later to reply to fdk - but I wanted to post a quick "whoopsie" at the Bubbles boo-boo. Bubbles is my vid muse. Babbles is my writing muse... man, she is going to be hacked off now!!!

<g>

I corrected the name and added the note that "Babbles" is my muse, so people wouldn't be confused.

Thanks so much for the comments so far - I'll be back to respond later!

-- DJ

DJ, the details were wonderful. Clark fed the fish, washed the dishes and wondered why Lois had pulled the measuring cup out of its hard-to-reach hiding place.

Love the physical sensations as he remembers. There's such meloncholic beauty in your writing.

Lovely story.
BJ

Beautifully written. I've also always felt we should have seen a scene like this one in the ep. Great job!

Jackie

DJ, this is so lovely and full of great details. I love that he did the dishes. Although now I'm wondering what it is that I forgot about that measuring cup!

Thank you for sharing this with us.

Of course, do remember that warnings (of any kind) are entirely the author's choice, here on this forum, and that there is no requirement for an author to add one.

So it could have been (although it obviously didn't apply to this story of DJ's) that you both missed one because the author doesn't believe in them and chose not to include one.

LabRat

Oh, DJ!! So beautiful and so sad!

Yes! This sums up the relationship perfectly.

And you're absolutely right - this is a scene that I think the writers cheated us out of, so thank you for rectifying that with this lovely vignette

My best to both Babbles and Bubbles - and may they continue to whisper in your ear.

Caroline

Nicely done. Powerful imagery and the emotions and sentiments were well presented.

I've always wondered about that episode. In TOGoM we have not only Lois, but Perry and Jimmy being all emotional over Clark's death. A guy they've only known for a little over a year.

But in DToSC we have Perry and Jimmy; two people who have known Lois for years (one her surrogate father, the other her 'little brother') and what do we get? The equivalent of 'Darn that girl, why couldn't she stay hidden?'

I've also always wondered why the talented ladies of these boards, who really enjoy showing Clark's soft and mushy side, haven't written more of these explorations of Clark's grief.

Maybe we will have the start of a new trend here.

Tank (who thought the story was well done, but thinks that it's going to take some doing by the gentle writers to catch up to the TOGoM rewrites)

Hello everyone. Thank so much for the fdk. Yes, I didn't post a deathfic warning with this story because of 2 reasons:

1. I didn't kill Lois, and
2. Lois isn't really dead

I only wrote this fic to explore Clark's feelings which I felt we were robbed of in the show.

But now to address individual comments. <g>

Hi Carol! I'm sorry to have upset you initially. I'm glad you realized what was going on. And I'm glad you ended up liking it once you realized it was an "inbetweenie" -- hee hee, I like that.

I forgot to include that Bubbles was my *muse* And then I even got her name wrong - ugh! <g>

Sorry for the confusion. <g>


Hi Darcy! Thank you. I appreciate that.


Heh - and thanks again Carol. <g>


Hi Sira! I'm pleased that it was so captivating. Thanks for the comments.


Hi Bakasi! I'm so glad you found it touching and thanks for the vote of agreement. I appreciate the fdk.


Hi Jenni. I'm glad you were able to relax (realizing that Lois was okay) and just appreciate it for what it was. Thanks for the fdk.


Hi BJ. Thanks for pointing out those details. <DJ hugs Sue and thanks her for brainstorming>. Thank you for the "lovely story" and I'm glad you enjoyed it.


Hi Jackiek! Thank you. I'm glad you agree. And thanks for the fdk.


Hi Lisa! Thanks for your comments. I'm sorry I didn't explain the measuring cup thing well enough. Measuring cups are usually used in cooking and we all know that Lois wasn't known for her cooking skills... so I thought Lois might keep something like that in a cabinet that she didn't get into very often, like the one above the Fridge. <g> That's all. And Clark wonders what she'd had it out for - what she had been trying to cook... Thanks for the fdk.


Hi Labby. Yes, as I said above, I chose not to post a warning because Lois wasn't killed in this story, nor was she even dead - this was just an "inbetweenie" as Carol said. <g> Thanks.


Hi Caroline! Thank you for those comments. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'll give my muses your regards. <g> Thank you.


Hi Tank! Yes. I love your comments. Exactly. It seemed to me that Lois's supposed death was just unfairly swept under the rug (so to speak) by the emotions not being truthfully explored. It's interesting that you bring up Jimmy and Perry as well... hmmm, I might have to take another shot at that - at their reactions. Thank you so much for your fdk!!! I really appreciated it.


Thanks again everyone for all the comments. It's nice to see that so many of you felt cheated by this episode like I did.

-- DJ

Very touching. I agree that Clark's grief was given short shrift on the show (due to time constraints, I'm sure), but you've done a masterful job of letting us know just how shredded his entire being was by Lois's (supposed) death. At his point, he'd probably be in the first stage (denial) and by visiting Lois's apartment, he's trying to come to grips with the reality of her permanent absence from his life. And it helps make his easy agreement to step into the cage more realistic. He's just discovered that Lois isn't really dead, so there's not much he wouldn't do to keep her that way.

I'm glad Lois wasn't really dead, too. Writing a story where Lois really dies isn't for the faint of heart, nor for those without some armor plating (take it from one who knows first-hand).

Brava! Very well done. You managed to touch my heart and make me feel Clark's pain. Thank you for such a wonderful vignette.

DJ, this was beautiful. I really felt Clark's grief as he wandered around her apartment. I'm so glad you filled the void of Clark's grieving for us. I wish there were more fics based off of that episode. I feel like there's a lot of possibility for it.

~Kristen

I have to agree with the others. It's all in the details. You've made this feel REAL. Furthermore, you're quite right. A thousand TOGOM's and just one of these.

Nice.

And also Adam Labotka's Don't Tug on Superman's Heart, and the companion piece, Don't Tug on Superman's Friends which looks at Perry and Jimmy's reaction. Both stories were Kerth nominees

Still, that's not very many. DJ, you may have triggered something here.

c.

DJ, I finally read it. It's a beautiful story.

I became a diehard Superman fan in 1969 when I became convinced that Superman loved Lois Lane, but there have been many times when I have had that belief shaken. Most infamously so by Superman II, of course, but there are also many episodes of LnC that really make you wonder how much Clark really, truly cares about Lois. Take ATAI (I think). Isn't that the episode where Lois asks Superman to freeze her to save Clark's parents? And Clark agrees to do it, even though he understands that the freezing might kill her? Even though he relizes that he might become her killer? Even so he does it, just to save his parents?

And then he almost does lose her. He almost does kill her. And when she wakes up, he doesn't even think she has deserved to be told about his secret. He later proposes to her, still without telling her about his secret, and when she confronts him with his deceit and won't accept his proposal right away - his proposal to her to share her life with him, when he however wouldn't share one of the most overwhelmingly important facts about his own life with her - then he is hurt and angry with her. Remember how easily he broke up with her in Contact, too. And in Don't Tug On Superman's Cape, he showed little grief at the news that Lois was dead. Yes, maybe that was because he received the news as Superman, and we never saw him react as Clark. Then again, maybe he didn't really care all that much?

Maybe that is the reason why we see so many more Lois deathfics than Clark deathfics? Some people have suggested that it's more satisfying to write Lois deathfics than Clark deathfics, because Lois could easily move on afterwards and she wouldn't be too badly hurt by Clark's death. His death wouldn't be so dramatic to her, in other words. Clark, on the other hand, would be devastated if Lois died. Well, I'm not so sure that this is true at all. Maybe it's the other way round. And maybe that is why we so badly want to see Clark grieve for Lois, and maybe that's why it is quite popular to serve up Lois dead and cold to Clark and to do it as heartbreakingly as possible, just to finally, finally touch Clark's heart and get to see him cry.

Maybe, if it became popular to rewrite DTOSC instead, it would become less urgent to really kill off Lois in order to get some reaction out of Clark.

So yes, DJ, this new take on Clark might be just what the LnC fandom needs.

Ann

DJ, I liked this very much. Since I remembered who Bad Brain was, I realized partway through the story that this was a DToSC inbetweenie. And I remember some post where there were several people (you and I included), who maintained that Clark's grief in the episode didn't seem as deep as Lois's in TOGoM, but only because we only saw him as Superman. That's one reason why it was lovely to see this. I thought you portrtayed his grief and feeling of loss very well - it certainly fit with the character of Clark that I have formed in my mind, even though we didn't get the opportunity to see this grief portrayed on the screen in the episode.

I know Adam's stories too, and I thought of them right away when I read this. But those are the only other DToSC rewrites that I can think of. And I'd love to see more too, but not for the reasons that Ann suggests. She writes

I have never tried to trivialize Lois' grief if Clark were to die before her. I think that she might find it easier to move on than Clark would in a similar situation. Frankly, though, I think that each of them would struggle on alone, always missing the other.

I would love to see more exploration of Clark's grief over losing Lois, either in-betweenie stories that basically remain in canon or "what-ifs", where Clark is dealing with her death for days before he finds her again. The feelings of guilt that he's probably harboring for leaving her to go to China for the earthquake. Lois played such an instrumental role in the creation and maintenance of the superhero - can he continue being Superman without her? The angst potential is enormous...

Kathy