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Top Banana
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OP
Top Banana
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Oh wow, Caroline! I really had no time this afternoon to read anything, but Sara had mentioned your story to me and said it was truly awesome. She didn't lie! I love the banter between Lois and Clark, so very S2; the way Lois babbles to explain she doesn't babble was very cute, and then there was this thought of hers: <He's quitting the Planet and moving across the country. He's getting married. He's quitting the Planet, moving across the country to get married. To Cat.> ... which made me go ROTFL.  This section was written in a very witty way, and then it shifted to something extremely sweet and romantic. What a smoochie!  Kaethel 
- I'm your partner. I'm your friend.
- Is that what we are?
- Oh, you know what? I don't know what we are. We kiss and then we never talk about it. We nearly die frozen in each other's arms, but we never talk about it, so no, I got no clue what we are.
~ Rick Castle and Kate Beckett ~ Knockout ~
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Oh, Caroline, this was going *so* beautifully until the end...! Great dialog (yes, Dick Clark *is* a freak of nature  And then it all fell apart... <sigh> You'd better fix this fast, is all I can say. PJ
"You told me you weren't like other men," she said, shaking her head at him when the storm of laughter had passed.
He grinned at her - a goofy, Clark Kent kind of a grin. "I have a gift for understatement."
"You can say that again," she told him.
"I have a...."
"Oh, shut up."
--Stardust, Caroline K
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Kerth
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Kerth
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Good part!! Two revelations one after another!!! Lois is going to faint!! <He's quitting the Planet and moving across the country. He's getting married. He's quitting the Planet, moving across the country to get married. To Cat.> Do I 
"Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way." Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial A Bad Week in the Wizengamot
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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<He's quitting the Planet and moving across the country. He's getting married. He's quitting the Planet, moving across the country to get married. To Cat.> 
"Meg...who let you back in the house?" -Family Guy
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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Well, my favorite line has already been quoted twice, so I'll just say chime in with Pam here. I was really enjoying this - wow, a B-plot story that I actually like! - and I loved the collage. And Clark's resolution. And then ARGH ARGH NO! Post the next part. NOW.
Lois: You know the deal.
Clark: Superman gets the guys in capes, Lois and Clark get the guys in suits.
-- Action Comics 827
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
What those guys said! Great dialogue, nice characterisations, loved the birthday wrapping paper More! Soon! LabRat
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Now why hasn't Tank commented yet?<g> I really liked this story for all the above reasons. That last Wham was too much! I also don't know if I should laugh or cry! Anyway you got me hooked now post post post! Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Very nice, Caroline! The part at the beginning about Dick Clark was so funny -- and so true  . There is something really freaky about him. And I loved the gift Lois gave Clark and I thought the "Happy Birthday" wrapping paper was just hillarious! And how could you leave us there?? thinking about asking Rivka to see an advanced copy of part 2 
Laura "The Yellow Dart" U. (Alicia U. on the archive)
"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles." -- Christopher Reeve
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
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Hmmmmm, I wonder if he should have told her before giving in to his baser instincts and indulging in all that yucky stuff.
Of course, then it would be quite a bit shorter as a story.
Now if we can just get this little emotional wham followed up by a nice big physical one (are there any drunken motorists on the roads as Lois tries to drive home?).
Tank (who wonders if Clark even realizes yet that Lois has left)
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Hi, Hey get back here. Great part.  Until she felt the soft touch of spandex on his chest. Why would Clark be wearing spandex? And under his clothes? He wouldn't, was the simple answer, unless he was a wrestler, which he wasn't. Or Superman, which he definitely wasn't. Lois hesitated. Of course he wasn't Superman. The mere thought of it was insane, ludicrous.
Incredibly possible.
She broke away from him, opened his shirt and stared at the blue and red "S." Feeling the tears starting to form, she had snatched up her purse and stormed out of his apartment, slamming the door behind without saying a word.  Wow! That woman is furious. Lois that is not nice, poor Clark. More soon, please. MAF
Maria D. Ferdez.
---
Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Wow!!! Fantastic!!! Well FoLCs you can say that I'm mean, but I love the idea for the end of the part. Still... Post more soon!!!!
What we've got here is failure to communicate...
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
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Caroline
good job
now fix it
more soon please
merry
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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WOW! That was truly amazing for a first time... I wanted the rest I was like ahhhh! He and his buddies above will get you if you don't post the next part soon! ~L.L Wanna Be
"Live with intention.
Walk to the edge.
Listen Hard.
Practice wellness.
Play with abandon.
Laugh.
Choose with no regret.
Continue to learn.
Appreciate your friends.
Do what you love.
Live as if this is all there is."
~Mary Anne Radmacher
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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What everybody else said EXCEPT the final paragraph  It is also a little out of sync with the rest. Lois the babbler and she just up and walks out without saying ANYTHING? Hope she turns around just outside the door and talks
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Caroline WOW! A fantastic start! So WAFFy! And some wonderful smoochies!  But yikes!!  Please post the next part ASAP! Tricia 
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Very nice Caroline!
Loved the present, (yep the birthday paper - a nice Lois touch) and the babling was great.
The smoochie was wonderful. I really like the title and am just hoping that it won't be too long after midnight that this is resolved.
Barb.
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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*sigh* Smoochies! but you can't possibly expect us to be happy with a WEEKLY posting schedule??  Especially after that cliffhanger!  More ASAP! (PLEASE?) ~Liz
Lois: Can I go?
Clark: No.
Lois: Oh come on, Clark, why do we go through this? We both know I’m going to go.
Clark: Then why do you ask?
Lois: I’m trying to be nice.
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Thank you, everybody, for your kind comments. I was absolutely terrified when I posted (I still am!) I, like any nervous author, kept hitting the "refresh" button every 30 seconds. It completely shocked me that, no more than 15 minutes after the story went up, I had comments. And the number of them! Wow. As I told Rivka in an email, I really only expected a couple of pity-comments. Certainly not this! So thank you, very much. So now I think I'll address some of the major issues pointed out to me by your responses. Of course, I need to yell at you for stopping it where you stopped it! AAAAAAAARRRGGGHHH! Post the next part! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You will fix this! or else... That last Wham was too much! how could you leave us there?? EXCEPT the final paragraph But yikes!! And I see that a few people seem to agree with me about Dick Clark: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif"> yes, Dick Clark *is* a freak of nature The Dick Clark discussion was hilarious The part at the beginning about Dick Clark was so funny -- and so true . There is something really freaky about him I thought so! He gives me the shivers!! Hehe People seem to have liked the present and the wrapping paper <g> too. Aw, Lois' gift was so great. Real personal touch to it loved the birthday wrapping paper And I loved the gift Lois gave Clark and I thought the "Happy Birthday" wrapping paper was just hillarious! I love the Christmas present wrapped up in birthday paper. Loved the present, (yep the birthday paper - a nice Lois touch) I am *so* glad you liked this. I took my *forever* to think of anything. I knew she had to give him a present but I really had no idea what she would give him. So I went around asking my friends. "If you were in love with this guy but you hadn't told him and you had to give him a Christmas present what would it be?" And of course half of my friends asked why I wanted a Christmas present in June, and the other half wanted to know who I was in love with. But, I have no idea how the present thing got into my head, but I'm sure glad it did! cont. in next post <g>
You've gotta be original, because if you're like someone else, what do they need you for?
~Bernadette Peters
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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A couple more little things: Hazel said: wow, a B-plot story that I actually like! Thank you very much! I am so very pleased you like it. The next part, though, will have A-Plot. I think I'll title it "When A-Plot Collides with B-Plot At the Most Inconvenient Time." <g> Hmmmmm, I wonder if he should have told her before giving in to his baser instincts and indulging in all that yucky stuff. Tank, this will be discussed later on. LOL. Yucky stuff is good, though, somebody needs to teach you that… And more Tank: Now if we can just get this little emotional wham followed up by a nice big physical one (are there any drunken motorists on the roads as Lois tries to drive home?) *sigh* What are we going to do with you?!?!?! Lois? Injured? Are you crazy? <g> But you never know what I might do… Liz said: …you can't possibly expect us to be happy with a WEEKLY posting schedule?? Nope, I gave up on that idea. LOL. Which is why I am posting part 2 as soon as I get done with this. Thank you Kaethel, Pam, Jose, Jen, Hazel, James, LabRat, Laura, Alicia, Tank (don't even think about haircuts <g>) Maria, Anna B, Merry, LL Wanna Be, Trenna, Tricia, Barb, and Liz. I'm still in shock. Lol. Caroline
You've gotta be original, because if you're like someone else, what do they need you for?
~Bernadette Peters
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