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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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What do you think? I wrote something under 1000 words! YAY
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Jul 2003
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,989 Likes: 11 |
I love it! Poor Lois, falling into the same patterns she knew from her childhood...but so glad she has Clark to rescue her!
~•~
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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Joined: Oct 2005
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I love it! Poor Lois, falling into the same patterns she knew from her childhood...but so glad she has Clark to rescue her! Yeah it's so easy to fall into the patterns of our parents. Thanks!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 3,093 Likes: 40
Boards Chief Administrator Pulitzer
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Boards Chief Administrator Pulitzer
Joined: Aug 2003
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It’s SOOOOOOO sad but SOOOO perfect!!  Well, and of course a happy ending!! But I was so tense and sad for like… SO MANY WORDS!
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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Joined: Oct 2005
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It’s SOOOOOOO sad but SOOOO perfect!! Well, and of course a happy ending!! But I was so tense and sad for like… SO MANY WORDS! Ha ha! Not THAT many words, cause it's only 981 lol
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Jan 2019
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2019
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Welp, I need some tissues.  The emotion was amazing. So much crammed in such few words. Glad Lois is able to finally realize she can leave the Lane traditions behind. She has her own family now.
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Joined: Oct 2005
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Welp, I need some tissues. The emotion was amazing. So much crammed in such few words. Glad Lois is able to finally realize she can leave the Lane traditions behind. She has her own family now. It was quite a challenge to try to get the story to fit under 1000 words. I had to cut quite a bit. Thanks!!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Oct 2022
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
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Love, love, love what you did with this! Lois's reflection on how she's acting like her mother, perceiving her daughter's reactions as she does, and then the conclusion--perfect! Is this short story challenge week??  -Bek
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Nov 2010
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Beautifully done. I love that Lois is able to recognize how her past was affecting her and then trying to move on.
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Joined: Oct 2005
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Joined: Oct 2005
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Love, love, love what you did with this! Lois's reflection on how she's acting like her mother, perceiving her daughter's reactions as she does, and then the conclusion--perfect! Is this short story challenge week?? -Bek Thank you! I wanted to focus on the way we process how our childhood affects us and the way we try to fix it as parents. Don't know if it's an official challenge week or people just jumping on the bandwagon but it's great!!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Feb 2021
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Heart-wrenchingly sweet. Thank you for sharing.
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Hi lovetvfan! This was a bit of a challenge as most of my stories are 20 000 words or longer so writing something under 1000 words was difficult. We may gave discussed a support group back in the day. I’m sure Sara would love to join, too. Set in the future, Lois attempts to untangle Christmas lights for the tree. Clark and the kids offer to help, but Lois is determined. After all, it’s her job to put up the lights. It’s a Lane family tradition. Oh boy. TEMPUS: /hides nylon thread and crazy glue/ The chance to finally win against Lois has never been greater. And every year she found herself using language she never used otherwise in front of Audrey and Rose, their two girls, now aged 5 and 7, as she desperately tried to straighten out the Christmas tree lights. Awww, the lil ones will learn to only curse at Christmas! "I would point out, honey, that I did offer to help you.” They shape up to be most adorable. This was supposed to be fun, wasn’t it? *Ding* Just a sec, I think my popcorn’s ready. “Can I do the honours?” Clark asked, and she couldn’t help but notice the hesitancy in his voice. He doesn’t die when electrocuted. “The fuse must be blown,” Lois muttered. I have a new DFCB here if you need to jam in a replacement fuse. “Daddy was just trying to help, Mommy,” Rose said softly. And there it was. That tone. Lois knew that tone. Had grown up with that tone. That tone spoke of walking on eggshells. Of tempers flaring, wine glasses and spilled merlot. Oh boy “Maybe we could put them up as a family. Maybe we could make our own tradition.” Sounds reasonable. “A new tradition. Sounds perfect.” End Lois still has a bit of learning to do, I gather. The others are correct, it’s a strong mixture of fun and sadness. Well crafted   Michael
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Wonderfully written! Started out funny, then it became heart-wrenching as Lois's frustration grew! “No, I have to put them up,” she insisted, not even certain why it mattered anymore. I love this line! Great work, Sara, thanks for sharing!
What we've got here is failure to communicate...
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Joined: Oct 2005
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Beautifully done. I love that Lois is able to recognize how her past was affecting her and then trying to move on. Thank you! It was hard to write something this short so I am glad it worked!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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Heart-wrenchingly sweet. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for reading!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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Hi lovetvfan! This was a bit of a challenge as most of my stories are 20 000 words or longer so writing something under 1000 words was difficult. We may gave discussed a support group back in the day. I’m sure Sara would love to join, too. Set in the future, Lois attempts to untangle Christmas lights for the tree. Clark and the kids offer to help, but Lois is determined. After all, it’s her job to put up the lights. It’s a Lane family tradition. Oh boy. TEMPUS: /hides nylon thread and crazy glue/ The chance to finally win against Lois has never been greater. And every year she found herself using language she never used otherwise in front of Audrey and Rose, their two girls, now aged 5 and 7, as she desperately tried to straighten out the Christmas tree lights. Awww, the lil ones will learn to only curse at Christmas! "I would point out, honey, that I did offer to help you.” They shape up to be most adorable. This was supposed to be fun, wasn’t it? *Ding* Just a sec, I think my popcorn’s ready. “Can I do the honours?” Clark asked, and she couldn’t help but notice the hesitancy in his voice. He doesn’t die when electrocuted. “The fuse must be blown,” Lois muttered. I have a new DFCB here if you need to jam in a replacement fuse. “Daddy was just trying to help, Mommy,” Rose said softly. And there it was. That tone. Lois knew that tone. Had grown up with that tone. That tone spoke of walking on eggshells. Of tempers flaring, wine glasses and spilled merlot. Oh boy “Maybe we could put them up as a family. Maybe we could make our own tradition.” Sounds reasonable. “A new tradition. Sounds perfect.” End Lois still has a bit of learning to do, I gather. The others are correct, it’s a strong mixture of fun and sadness. Well crafted Michael Oh wow, thank you for such wonderful detailed feedback! I appreciate you taking the time! Thank you!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 686 Likes: 4 |
Wonderfully written! Started out funny, then it became heart-wrenching as Lois's frustration grew! “No, I have to put them up,” she insisted, not even certain why it mattered anymore. I love this line! Great work, Sara, thanks for sharing! Oh wow, thank you! I have a lot of trouble with short stories and you are so good at them so I appreciate it!
Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
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