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FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19219 01/04/05 06:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2004 Posts: 451 Burbank, California Nicole S OP Beat Reporter
OP Nicole S Beat Reporter Joined: Dec 2004 Posts: 451 Burbank, California	Any and all feedback welcome

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19220 01/04/05 09:02 PM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,992 Sydney Australia T TriciaW Pulitzer
TriciaW Pulitzer T Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,992 Sydney Australia	Nicole You may have noticed I’m a reader who hasn’t been posting feedback regularly. Unfortunately I’m a little disappointed in the direction the story has taken. I thoroughly enjoyed the first part of the story. But have only skimmed the last few parts. The plot seems to be at a standstill. I agree completely with Wendy and Erica. Some of the material does not advance the plot in any way. I also have a problem with the length of some of your paragraphs. This is a personal thing but I tend to wander off and lose concentration if the paragraph is too long. This is just my opinion and I know lots of other readers will disagree. I really love the rest of your work. You are an excellent writer. And I will read the rest of this to see what happens. Tricia

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19221 01/05/05 04:08 AM
Joined: Oct 2004 Posts: 509 Mexico Karla Kent Columnist
Karla Kent Columnist Joined: Oct 2004 Posts: 509 Mexico	Hi I agree with Tricia on this: "I have a problem with the length of some of your paragraphs. This is a personal thing but I tend to wander off and lose concentration if the paragraph is too long." Ok....lets see...Is just that I think is Too much information, all the memories, all the talks, all the thoughts....and he still in coma. Karla My journal: http://charmingkarla.livejournal.com/

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19222 01/05/05 09:40 AM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,846 Puerto Rico mariadferdez. Pulitzer
mariadferdez. Pulitzer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 3,846 Puerto Rico	Hi, Great part. That explain does dreams or memories. Quote “Smooth,” Lois said. Jack turned. “How long have you been here?” he asked, embarrassed. “Just long enough to hear your threat. You know, I have tried pleading and luring him back with words of love. But blackmail… that I haven’t tried,” she said, smiling. “Well, I’ve never been a straight-shooter,” Jack said. Get back here! I want more! More ASAP, please. MAF Maria D. Ferdez. --- Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age. MAF

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19223 01/05/05 12:04 PM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,837 California fly-over country Artemis Pulitzer
Artemis Pulitzer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 2,837 California fly-over country	I like Jack's conversation with Clark and the encouraging news that there is brainwave activity and he's been dreaming. I'm still with you. Artemis History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19224 01/05/05 02:01 PM
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 4,058 NY Laurach Pulitzer
Laurach Pulitzer Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 4,058 NY	Well I also am still with you but I do see the others point too. It is time to wake him up now. they still have enought o hash out when he regains consciousness. laura Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?” Caroline's "Stardust"

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19225 01/05/05 04:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2004 Posts: 451 Burbank, California Nicole S OP Beat Reporter
OP Nicole S Beat Reporter Joined: Dec 2004 Posts: 451 Burbank, California	Thank you guys for sticking w/ me... I am posting Part 16 now, and you guys may get your wish

Re: FDK: Have A Little Faith in Me Pt. 15/20? #19226 01/08/05 05:07 PM
Joined: Jun 2003 Posts: 1,763 Canada SuperRoo Merriwether
SuperRoo Merriwether Joined: Jun 2003 Posts: 1,763 Canada	Quote I think in the future we’ll keep a lojack on you so we know where you are at all times,” he joked. Lojack? I'm still here. I'm really enjoying this. I do though find when the paragraphs are large I have troube following. I am now off to read part 16 - thumbs up from this computer. I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.

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