cool, i get to start 2 caption threads in a row!

otoh, this is captions, chapter 11. is this one going to be bankrupt?

hope not.

here's the new pic. it's a classic. (and, btw, the pilot is, imo, a gold mine of possible caption pics) see what you can do with it.



have fun.

Paul

Lois: Okay, well, I'll admit it, this is a lot of fun. But I still don't think Perry installing a trampoline in the newsroom is quite what those speakers at the 'Motivate Your People' conference meant!

Lois: "Okay, very clever, whoever you are. But I can see the ropes holding you up. Don't think I'm fooled even for a second... ARGH! There aren't any ropes!


Wendy

Announcer: On our next episode of "Street Magic: Metropolis", David Blayne shows that he, too, can levitate in front of the entire Daily Planet newsroom.

Kathy

Staffer #1: "How long have they been like that?"

Cat: "An hour, maybe two."

Staffer #2: "Are they stuck?"

Cat: "Looks like it."

Jimmy: "Should we call the fire department or something?"

Cat: "I'm torn..."

Visitor to the newsroom: Ack! A flying man!

Staffer: So what? We live in Metropolis. Nothing shocks us.

well, it's been a while. captions have been slower on this pic than i'd hoped. oh well. maybe it just wasn't a good one. in any case, time to pick.

despite my usual efforts to not go with the person who just went, something about this one just hits the right button:



so, i'm going to have to go with lncroxmysox. you're up!

Paul

Slow, maybe, but they all made me laugh this last time around. Very clever ones, guys! Ok thanks to the inside information regarding that screencaps-galore website, I've found a picture that amuses me much.



Have funnnn...

Oh yeah, and I seriously hate this episode. But all feelings aside... Oh and PLEASE let me know if I'm running one that's already been done. I went back and looked at a lot of the older posts, but I'm still paranoid.

Ems

okay, i shouldn't get political, but this looks like a press conference, and i can't help it...

"do not doubt me. i am going to win this election. i starred in 'total recall.' think about it. besides, look... my muscles are bigger than superman's. watch as i flex for you. you see? next to me, superman looks puny. when i am governor, i will use these muscles to crush the bad things like the pollution and the crime and the traffic."

(that's all i've got for now. if i think of more... i'll be back. )

Paul

"Clark, there's no need to go Superman on him. Really, Mel Gibson an I are just good friends."

Carole

[Looking up at a news ticker which proclaims: "Poll results are in: BATMAN is America's Favorite Superhero!"]

Clark: "Grr!"
Lois: "There must be some mistake..."

Lois: "Clark, please, calm down ... it's not worth starting a fight over."

Clark: "No way, Lois ... this dry cleaners has put starch in my underwear for the last time!"


Kathy

Clark: You call that a "Bob the Tomato" impersonation? Even I can do a better "Bob" impersonation! Watch!

Lois: Clark, you're turning red....

(Reporter framed by L&C's heads) This is not my good profile!

ROTFLMAO!!!!

Ohhh this was tough, but I'm going to have to go with this one...

Clark really does look like he should be growling here, doesn't he? Hehe. Okay, your turn, Wanda...

YAAAYYYY!



Go for it, guys... This one cracked me up! I hope no one's done this before. If so, let me know--I've got more where that came from!!
-Wanda


Edit: I didn't edit the post; I simply resized the pic. Elena
And to give credit where it's due, the original screenshot can be found on this site .

Superman/Clark: Okay, when the girls walk into the room, just flash a brilliant smile and they'll fall all over you...

Superman:...and I ate a bomb this big today and that's the story of my life so let's hear yours

yes, that is a nice costume you have there. the thing is -- and i want to make sure you really think about this -- just because you have a nice costume, it doesn't mean you can fly. so, i'll carry you down nice and easy, and you promise you won't try to fly anymore, okay? ... whew. bad enough when kids do that, but he looked old enough to be my dad!

---

how do i hide the boots? oh, i just take them in my hands like this and use my super strength to compress them into tiny little balls. then, when i need to change back, i just streach them out again. sure, i go through boots fairly quickly, but i don't see that there's a better way, really...

---

how do you get a 900 number? you just have to call the phony company and register it. the important thing is to shop around. sure, the customer pays for the call, but you still have to pay to have the line. go to the wrong phone company, and you'll get a bill this big! ... say, what do you need a 900 number for, anyway?

---

so you ran into lois lane, huh? well, let me tell you... the key to surviving an encouter with lois is to know when to be amused. when she's just babbeling along, learn to find that funny. but, and i cannot stress this enough, when she is ranting at you -- not just babbeling, but outright angry -- don't laugh. no matter what it is, don't laugh. i don't care if your skin is as invulnerable as mine. lois gets angry, the best thing to do is to fly out of there as fast as you can.

---

you're an orphan? really? and the people who raised you never explained...? oh, foster care. they all assumed someone else had told you. okay, well, here's how it works. when a man and a woman love each other very much...

---

well, the key to it is... you've got to learn to trust your invulnerability. every part of you is invulnerable. that includes the eyes. so, even if you're flying at supersonic speed -- actually, especially then -- you have to remember that you don't have to blink.

---

"... so, if you've x-rayed the bomb and you still can't see how to disarm it, the next thing to try is freeze breath. sometimes, that will slow down the timer, and it'll even stablize some explosives enough that they won't detonate. if that doesn't work, just remember this one basic rule of bomb defusing -- if all else fails, eat it."

"you can do that?"

"yeah, sure. just pretend it's a spicey meatball or a tasty hoagie or something. oh, yeah... that reminds me. they actually don't taste that good. so, after it explodes, get something better to eat. i suggest ice cream. nothing gets rid of the taste of that annoying smokey c4 aftertaste like a nice banana split."

---

... so then you use your heat vision to cut the door's control wires. you getting this so far? ... good. so, now the door's open. first thing you have to do is use your freeze breath. that will confuse the heat sensors on the missiles. then you can dash past them through the blue archway, and that takes you to the level four boss. he pretty much goes down like the last two, and when you beat him, you get the second half of the red key...

No, I'm serious - I speared a fish *this big* with just my laser vision. Lois was really impressed, and when she gets impressed, HOO BOY!

-Breanna

Everyone's responses were hilarious!!!

I'm gonna have to go with HatMan on this one... for both QUALITY *and* QUANTITY!

-Wanda (I'm still laughing!)

LOL I really liked that one
(and I am picky in caption competitions)

wow, i think that's the best reaction i've gotten to a caption post. thanks!

so, i guess that means i need to post a new pic.

ah, decisions decisions...

well, i narrowed it down to four (and i've got the others saved in a file, along with a bunch more... i add to it whenever i browse through christiane's site and see something i like), and retrorose helped me make the final cut. so, here it is. see what you can do with this...




Paul

Hmm, Catwoman meets Robin Hood???

Clark: Mom, I'll never get any candy looking like this when I go 'trick-or-treat'ing this year!

Clark: I don't know mum...I look like a trapeze artist and I'm really not comfortable with the green color.

Martha: I know honey, but I'm working on camouflage here...

Clark: with leppard skin printings and leather accessories? I don't wanna look like Kevin Sorbo!

Martha: it's *lynx * printings... I thought it would be a good sum up you know: the accurate vision, the strength thing, invincibility...

Clark: ...along with the flying.

Martha: Okay, maybe I exagerated.

I don't know, Mom. All this brown... it makes my butt look big.

"Mom, I said I wanted to change my look to discourage Cat Grant. Considering her jungle drum fetish, I don't think this is going to do it...."


Kathy

Clark: I've heard of Tarzan wearing leopard skin underpants but this is ridiculous

well, it's been a couple days since the last caption, so i guess it's time to pick one. tough call as usual, but i think i'm going to have to go with julie stars this time.

good one, and timely, too!

so, you're up, julie!

Paul

Yay! oky, so lets see what you can do with this:

Lois: S...See...Spot...R-R-Run...
Clark: Keep going, you're getting it.
Lois: Spot...Runs...F-F-F...
Clark: Sound it out...

-------
{I cheated in order to write this. My screen shows a square w/ an X instead of a picture, so I clicked "reply w/ quote" then copied the URL into the adress bar. It worked!}

*Lois and Clark discover pictures of Jimmy's new girlfriend*

Lois: Wow...I didn't know a human leg could do that...

Clark: Wait a minute... isn't that *our* backyard?!

Lois: This doesn't make any sense.

Clark: It's very simple. See, Lucy tells Charlie Brown that she's going to be nice to him and not pull the ball away, so he comes running up to kick it. But in *this* panel, she pulls it away anyway.

Lois: I *still* don't get it...

Clark: What the---? Jimmy never told me he'd been keeping transcripts of everyone's conversations!!!

Lois: You told Ralph I was a WHAT?

Clark: What do you think of this song I'm writing?

Lois: "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, E-I-E-I-O?"

Clark: It's still a work in progress...

hmm. for some odd reason, i can't see the pic unless i go directly to the url anyone else have that problem?

any case... captions..

(btw, queen of the capes, i don't know about anyone else, but i find it a little neater to read multiple captions in one post, rather than in several consecutive ones.)

----

hey, watch this, lois! if i control it very carefully, i can use my super breath to slide this cardboard cutout of a hockey puck across the page! it's like air hockey. cool, huh? and it came free on the back of a cereal box. cool, huh?

----

lois: hmm, according to this script, the people of "new krypton" are going to invade earth and cause all sorts of problems.

clark: yeah, but, ooo, look! i get you as a concubine!

---

lois: wow, these are the ugliest ties i've ever seen. why are they even considering making them?

clark: ooo... i like that one!

---

lois: this is scary. lex luthor's blackmail files are detailed and extensive.

clark: wow, look what that guy did!

---

lois: that's a b sharp, and that's an a minor, and... i just don't get it.

clark: it goes like this... doo doo dee, doo doo dah doo doo, doo doo doo dah dum dee dum...

lois: you can sight-read music?

clark: yeah.

lois: and you can order dinner in... how many languages was it? ... nevermind. and you can write kerth-winning articles. so, how come you can't come up with a decent excuse before you have to dash out the door?

clark: well, uhm... you see... er...

lois: eloquent, as always, kent.

---

lois: i don't get it. why is this filed under "r"? this basil frankweiler woman has the craziest system.

clark: wait a sec, this one is from rome, italy. i think i get it now...

---

lois: so, according to this, blue kryptonite will make superman act like a simpleton, and, as a side effect, will make his head look tan even if his hands are pale. weird, but i think this may explain things, clark!

clark: ooo, shiney paper clip!

I couldn't see it until I went to the URL either. But when I cam back here, I could. Weird!

/me checks bottom of page -- gone again!

.

.

Clark: Sure I can hit that spot! *he spits*

To clear up the mystery of the last pic: it's on a geocities site. Geocities doesn't allow outside linking. So the picture doesn't show up here, instead you get the red X.

Most folc's use http://www.loisundclark.de . That's Christiane's site with many wonderful screen caps. It's in German, but it's easy to understand.

Saskia
Section Moderator

Well, I can't even see it if I go to the url through Paul's link. I just get page not found.

And the captions are so intriguing too...

LabRat (who thinks maybe we could have a whole new quiz - try to guess the photo from the captions... )

Well, none of the links works for me, not event the geocities one. I guess I'll just coin a famous line (no harm meant) :

Finally someone worse in posting a pic than me...

Carole (puts her Kevlar bullet-proof vest on before ducking under her desk)

Thanks to Saskia for sending me the photo in email.

And now I'm rolling around laughing at the Charlie Brown and See Spot Run captions.

LabRat

darn those b#s. Why can't they just call it a C like everyone else? And (although the inharmonic C is) b# isn't in an A- chord. You just can't do that. It'd be like saying there's a C# (rather than a Db, it's the same note) in a Bb- chord.

Okay, I'm done now... and I know this has nothing to do with anything here... it's the musician in me coming out... maybe I've played for one too many singers...

Samik.

Okay, I've had some more time to look into this, and I finally know why Paul's link doesn't work either. First, I thought it was because there was a period in the url. But deleting that didn't work either. (sorry, Paul, but that's why I edited your post).

So, as I said, geocities doesn't allow outside linking. Not even when you click on a url. So, if you want to see the picture from Julie, you'll have to copy and paste the link. That's when I do get the picture.

So the link is: http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/5946/lc42.jpg

Hope that helps everyone.

Saskia
Section Moderator

Oh my, I didn't know this would cause so much trouble... next time I'll refrain from using Geocities. Sorry guys!

that's okay, sas. it was worth a shot.

oh, and samik- sorry. i should have looked things up. i haven't read music in ages. i should have looked up the notes for the piece i had in mind, but, well, it was late and i was lazy.

anyway, i uploaded the pic to my earthlink webspace. i know that works because that's where i keep my avatar, too. so, here it is, everyone.



Paul

Clark: So that's the new play Jimmy's writing?

Lois: According to this script, I'm Jimmy's hot stripper girlfriend who constantly refers to him as Jimmy-the-Great and the-All-Powerful-Ultra-Incredible-Jimmy-Babe.

Clark: What the---? He made Superman his side-kick?!

-------------Thanks4TheAdvice,Hatman--------------

Lois: It's a butterfly.

Clark: Looks more like a bat to me...

Lois: They say people who see bats are paranoid.

Clark: Yep, it's a butterfly...definitely a butterfly...

--------------------------------------------------

Clark: Are those the files for that story you're writing on Korean War vets?

Lois: Yeah. These are documents that one of the clerks in a MASH unit kept in his files; I thought they might be useful.

Clark: Hey, look! On that one sheet of paper, it looks like somebody was trying to practice forging somebodyelse's name!

Lois: Who is "Sherman T. Potter"?

------------------------------------------------

Clark: See, Lois? That's where you made your mistake---it's 2 cups of sugar and 1 tbsp of salt, not the other way around.

----------------------------------------------------

Clark: See, Lois? I told you I had a twin brother; here's the photographic proof!

Lois: Clark, this is just a picture of you standing in front of a mirror.

----------------------------------------------------

Clark: Interesting. And you say you found this on the internet?

Lois: Yeah. There seems to be a whole website full of this stuff.

Clark: Wow.

Lois: "...Just then, Clark's Super-hearing picked up---"

Clark: ---Never mind that; go back to the part where I'm unbuttoning your blouse...

--------------------------------------------------

Lois: It says here that it's impossible to whistle after eating a cracker.

Clark: Nonsense! I can do it; watch: *fff* Um, wait a minute. *fff* Let me try again. *fff* I can do this, honest! Let me try one more time...

Clark: "Any luck, Lois? It's been over an hour..."

Lois: "I STILL can't see it. I HATE these Magic Eye things!"

Clark: "Just relaaaax your eyes. Look; it's a tiger!"

I just found it amusing, that's all. Sorry if I came off as critical. Anyway...

Lois: Cut it out, Clark. You keep blowing it like that and paper's going to be strewn all about the room.

Samik.

Clark: Hey Lois look there's a cofee stain right there
Lois: Where?
Clark: (points with his finger) Right there
Lois: Ok that's it I'm gonna tell Perry to ban Jimmy from the coffee machine when he is researching for us

oh, no problem samik. i'm glad i could amuse. luckily, this is the caption competition, and i was trying to amuse. i wish all my mistakes could turn out so well.

while i'm writing, i have to say i'm majorly impressed with queen of the capes on this one. talk about quality and quantity! two batches of 'em, and some really great ones in both.

Paul, reading back over the captions for this pic, and stilll

Aw, Thanks HatMan!
Actually, I've gained caption notoriety on another website. www.gothamcityusa.com is a Batman fansite with monthly caption contests (link won't work; website is under construction) and I once submitted over *forty* entries for the month of February. Ah, my glory days...
Alas, though, I didn't win; the prize went to some un-funny pink underwear joke.

I guess it's time to choose a winner. Queen of Capes, I thought yours were very funny, especially this one (and the Charlie Brown one- given my obsession for Peanuts comics)-

Lol, well done.

Yipee!

*Runs off to find a picture*