Well this is gonna be the place that you guys can throw the tomatoes(or other vegetables if u prefer). I welcome all comments.

have fun, Superteen

Peace, Love, and all that stuff @};- :0)

No tomatoes, Superteen. I liked it!

The only piece of constructive criticism I have, is that you switched from past tense to present and then back to past. I think it reads better when it's all in the same tense.

Having said that, let's move on to all the wonderful things I liked about this:

LOL - Yeah, I can just hear Clark saying that.

Aww, poor Clark! I really felt for him here.

Hi,

Great story.

Well, for a first fanfic, this is very promising, Superteen. Well done!

The little problems with tense etc are easily something any good beta worth their salt will steer you right on in the future - you can always advertise for a beta here on these mbs. You know, for your next story.

And when you submit this one to the Archive (like you're going to...right? <g>) your General Editor will do any necessary tidying up here and there. So it's not a major problem.


Very enjoyable. Thanks for sharing!

LabRat

since this is the first fic that I've actually bothered to write down I'm not really sure how to send it to the archives... I've read so many in the past couple of years but i don't have a clue how to send one to archive...

Superteen

Peace, Love, and all that stuff @};- :0)

Oh, couldn't be easier, Superteen!

If you want to check out the submissions format here on the Archive website, that will give you the lowdown on what to do to prepare your story for submission.

Once you've got the story into the proper format, etc, just mail it to me at the eddress below and I'll take it from there.

Likewise, if you've any other questions on the format etc, just holler!

LabRat
Editor-in-Chief
The Lois and Clark Fanfic Archive
labrat@blueyonder.co.uk

Well I think for a first fic this was really cute! Beta readers do help but the idea and creativity is already there. I hope we see more from you soon. Laura

LOL, I enjoyed this! Thanks for sharing it.

Poor Clark, it never even occurred to him that she was talking about *him*... Thank heavens Lois got things straightened out in time I think my favorite part was when she was reminding herself to breathe <g>

PJ

Superteen

A great idea!
I enjoyed it immensely.

Tricia

Astonishing debut, Superteen!!!

Cute too

I hope we hear more from you soon,

Jose (who has noticed that he has just quoted Luthor :rolleyes: )

Great story, Superteen! I like it very much. This confusion is so ironic, funny, interesting... works perfectly!! I can't find the words to describe what I felt reading it... you know, kinda like wanting to grab Lois and Clark's heads them and bang them on the wall... you know what I mean

You LUNKHEAD!! (Clark, I mean)

At last!!!

Anyway, Superteen, keep writing and bring us more beautiful stories soon.
AnnaBtG.

P.S.:
Me too. What's your point?

I guess the point was that some people think that teenagers can barely get through writing a paper for school much less something not required... I think it really helps anyone write to have a subject that interests u greatly... like ummm... Lois and Clark... LOL

anyway I'm glad I'm not alone out there as a teenage fanfic writer...

Superteen

Peace, Love, and all that stuff @};- :0)

I've heard that lots of places have that prejudice against younger writers... but around here we don't care how young or old you are as long as you can write a good story <g>

I have to believe that everyone improves with practice (otherwise, I've just wasted eight years of my life ) but that's not especially related to a person's age. Anyway, glad you've taken the plunge!

PJ
who thinks your sig file is a hoot, too!

Aww, very sweet, Superteen. I'm glad you finally wrote one of those stories in your head down and shared it with us! I think you'll find that it's quite addictive.

A classic case of L&C talking at cross-purposes, each of them as clueless as the other -- Clark never expecting she's talking about him, and Lois assuming he *would* think she's talking about him!

Very cute.

Oh, and what Pam said -- we don't care how young or old anyone is around here, as long as they give us stories.

Welcome to the boards!

Kathy

I have to ditto what others have said. It's a very good story on your first time out. I look forward to more stories from you.

These two always seem to make those assumptions about each other. And just before their assumptions screw up their relationship, you brought them back together in a nice, WAFFy way!

Cute, Superteen!

Just keep writing!!


Wendy

Nice and cute story, Superteen. I'm glad that Clark kissed Lois goodbye and led them to realise there was a big misunderstanding... Lois came close to being as much a lunkhead as Clark

And congratulations on posting your first fanfic! Hope to see lots more from you in the future. And as others have said, none of us care about your age as long as you give us that sort of lovely, waffy story to read.

Kaethel

I agree with the others, Superteen. Nice and sweet story. Very good for a first time.


You are going to write more now, right?

Saskia

Oh, THIS was your point... Don't worry about it. I've been around since February, constantly posting stories obviously worse than the other writers' ones, and no one ever thought to blame my age about it.

AnnaBtG. (hoping that this thing Pam said about improving when practicing is true)

P.S.:

I like it.

Cute story, Superteen, I really enjoyed it .

Just a quick comment on the young fanfic writer thing . . . I posted my first L&C fanfic just before i turned 16 . . . don't tell anyone, but it was in 1996 . My first L&C story, I didn't even know that dialoge needed to be separated into different paragraphs! So I don't think you have anything to worry about being a young writer -- you either Annabtg -- you are young and a non native speaker and your writing has definately improved by leaps and bounds in such a short time. It took me at least a year of writing to learn that dialogue goes in different paragraphs .

- LauraA

Superteen
well done
keep writing
merry

I liked it. The next generation is upon us.