The grungy table sat empty and alone, save for one small wooden chair, and the refrigerator, nauseatingly green, wouldn’t stop rattling.

She couldn't stay here anymore. Not after tonight. It wasn't her. This wasn't Lois Lane.

Oh, who was she kidding? She longed for someone to validate her existence. Someone to say, "Oh, thank God you're alive, Lois!"

But only because of some God-awful twist of fate that had brought a different Lois Lane to his door.

Which didn't make any sense, anyway. Why would that upset him unless...

Unless he loved the other Lois.

And then there was the niggling feeling somewhere inside that she just might be in love with Clark Kent.

He realized now that as much as it had felt like it, he hadn't really been in love with the first Lois. Lust. Attraction. Some kind of inexplicable echo of a connection between them. But he hadn't been in love with her.

And now that *his* Lois was here... he wasn't in love with her either.

And it was suffocating him.

posted August 22, 2005 08:01 AM
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And bonus points to anyone who identifies Wendy's lines among mine.


Clark.

Clark had. But only because of some God-awful twist of fate that had brought a different Lois Lane to his door. One who obviously meant a great deal to him, otherwise he wouldn't have been so stunned instead of angry to find a strange woman in his apartment. Maybe those flashes of longing she'd seen in his eyes had been meant for her, the other Lois. Surely it would be confusing to have an exact double of someone dear to you mere feet away, and surely trying to remain stoic about it would be even worse of a trial.

He obviously admired the other Lois. Lois was certain that her counterpart held a special place in Clark's heart. A counterpart she clearly didn't match up to. Any illusion of similarity had been shattered when she'd revealed how weak and foolish she'd been.

Which didn't make any sense, anyway. Why would that upset him unless...

Unless he loved the other Lois.

Maybe that was why he'd been so upset. At first in his bedroom, then later after she'd said... too much. He'd realized it wasn't *her* standing in his bedroom. He'd been distant. Distracted. Thinking of the other Lois? Then later, he'd been horrified. Had he been comparing her to her counterpart? Finding her wanting?

That didn't make sense either.

She wasn't some replacement Lois, nor was it true that just because she was Lois Lane she was meant to be with him.

*That* was a ridiculous notion.

But whatever the reasons for his stunned reaction, he'd changed his mind. Or had done a pretty good job at hiding his dismay and shock. He'd made a heartfelt plea for her to stay, actually convinced her that he *did* care. About *her*.

Oh, she hoped it was true. She hoped he really did feel *something* for her, even if it was just concern for her well being.

Lois Lane hated to admit it, but she needed help. Clark's help. And she was starting to realize she'd need his help for more than just putting an end to the mess in the Congo.

She needed money. Or a place to stay. Or both. But she loathed the thought that he might consider her a charity case. She really needed to get a start on putting her life back together, and soon. She hated feeling so helpless and alone.

Though... she guessed she wasn't alone anymore, not in the grander sense. There was another universe. Another Lois Lane. Actually, there could be hundreds of Lois Lanes. Lois Lane was a dime a dozen. The thought only made her feel more isolated.

She'd known coming home wasn't going to be easy, but she would never have imagined she'd be faced with anything she'd been hit with in the last few hours. Parallel universes. H.G. Wells. Counterparts. An evil man trying to take over the world.

And then there was the niggling feeling somewhere inside that she just might be in love with Clark Kent.

And then there was the niggling feeling somewhere inside that she just might be in love with Clark Kent.

I might not be coherrent, but I'm on time!

Oh, who was she kidding? She longed for someone to validate her existence. Someone to say, "Oh, thank God you're alive, Lois!"

I know I've told you before, but I just love that line. It *really* hits home.

Holy hell, Sara!

You... you... that's amazing writing! I just... it's like being slapped in the face.

For fear of quoting the entire rescue scene, I wont, but... damn. That whole scene was amazing. Amazingly written. Amazingly powerful. Just... amazing.

Lois hugged the pillow tightly as she sobbed. She could only see half of the motel room from her curled up position, but it still depressed her. Everything was blurry through her tears. Muted.

She couldn't stay here anymore. Not after tonight. It wasn't her. This wasn't Lois Lane.

Lois Lane didn't stay in cheap motels; she stayed at the Lexor. Lois Lane didn't have to worry about how she was going to afford her next meal. Lois Lane didn't need to ask for help, for anything. Lois Lane didn't ever feel lonely or helpless. And most certainly, Lois Lane didn't cry.

Then he'd flown into his bedroom and saw her there. It'd been like a cold bucket of water being thrown in his face, shocking him and robbing him of the air in his lungs. Everything had halted. The world had stopped turning.

There she'd stood, the sole cause of all his misery and anguish.

The Lois of the other universe had shown him what it could be like. Shown him that true love - a love so deep one could drown if he or she weren't careful - did exist. For some. She'd shown him just how perfect, how meant to be, Lois Lane and Clark Kent were for each other.

But not every Lois Lane and Clark Kent.

He resented his Lois. He flinched. She wasn't *his*.

The woman he'd saved... she might think differently, but she was just one person. He was responsible for the whole of Metropolis, not to mention the world, and he was no longer sure it was something he could handle. The good and well-being of the world was centered squarely on his shoulders.

And it was suffocating him.