Thoughts are always appreciated I hope you had as much fun with the Unreliable Narrator as I had. Okay, after 3 years, ‘fun’ might not be the exactly right word, but still…

Vignette

Thanks!

Michael

You got me: hook, line, and sinker.

I did think an occasional line (e.g., about a man having his pride, or about the jailer beginning to be obese) seemed slightly "off" for Clark, but nothing was amiss enough to make me rethink who the narrator might be. The surprise ending worked perfectly.

I hope we won't have to wait years for another Darth Michael vignette.

Well done.

Joy,
Lynn

Ditto. I thought it was Clark/Superman in the Kryptocage. Good stuff. Write more often.

Artemis

You completely fooled me! 😯

I just fell into the trap, thinking it was Superman who was a prisoner in his kryptonite cage, waiting for Lex and Lois wedding. 😕

When the last paragraph, the scales fell from my eyes and I had to re-read the whole story, tuned to the idea that Luthor was who was in prison. 🙊

Excellent twist of history and excellent how you raised the situation

You got my curiosity raised and now I will look into the files not only for She's stories, but yours 😉

Awesome-tricky-creative!

It would take a LOT of planning to coordinate everything to fit together like it did--very impressive

Really enjoyed it!
Laura

Michael!

I started to wonder about the paragraph regarding "crush" but then it fit so well with self-loathing Clark. I have to admit I skimmed over "obese" the first time and caught it the second.

How very evil of you! Excellent work on the bait and switch. You had me fooled. I, too, needed to read it again before coming to comment.

Lots of fun. You should do this every year! (Write a story, that is.) Welcome back!

Michael has some very wonderful stories on the dark side. Even one or two which are completed. /Just joking. I think he only has that one uncompleted one. Nudge, nudge, nudge, Michael./ (There's a great one set during HiM about playing games...)

Dude, you are tricky. Remind me never to buy any bridges from you. You're not of Sicilian ancestry, are you? And you don't have six fingers on one hand, I hope?

All kidding aside, that was an excellent story. Like the others, you had me fooled up to the reveal. I really thought this was an embittered, desolate Clark sitting in some cell with no sunlight to speak of, waiting for Luthor to come and gloat at him some more.

But it wasn't. And you pulled it off. Congratulations, sir! This will be nomination-worthy a year from now.

You tricky thing.

What a great twist ending! Like everyone else, I totally thought it was Clark locked away in the kryptonite cage - then you do a 180 and let us know it's Lex! Well played.

BTW, why does Lex get a presidential pardon? Has he bought off the president too?

Oooh boy, Lex is out of jail! Look out Lois and Clark.

Nicely done.

Oooooh! Lots of yummy goodness

There’s a reason — besides procrastinating — that this thing took 3 years to see the light of day. The other’s waiting for Valentine’s Day to come around again, of course. And then missing the deadline. Rinse and repeat

Virignia! You’ve made it! Michael

I posted:
Michael posted:
No problem--I actually debated a bit before bringing it up, trying to remember if I was forgetting something in the storyline ...

Really creative story, Michael--very impressive work!

Laura

Michael!

It's about frickin' time you posted this! I've only been watching and waiting for about a year now. :p

I admit, the first time I read this, I blithely assumed it was Clark. All the other times I read it, even knowing that it was Lex, I'd still have to admire how skillfully you dodged around the reveal.

Well done, sir. Well done!

Now, I believe the conversation has turned towards getting to you to finish an nfic...

I have to admit I was totally fooled by the story. I should have seen the vying against Superman lines for what they really were. Also Lois not choosing him or Superman makes more sense if it is Luthor thinking it. However, everything could be fit to apply to Clark, so I did. That was a good story.

Oooh! More goodies!


Hi Laura!
Thanks so much for going through with mentioning it!



Thank you so very much!
Oh boy.


Hello John!


Michael

Hi, Michael!

Mangy?

What a fun little tale. I, for one, enjoy a well-done unreliable narrator/bait and switch. Nicely handled!

Ingeborg said: Sue S. said: I agree. You did an excellent job of picking the perfect scenes to keep up the illusion.

Lynn S. M. said Deadly Chakram said I got a tip-off that this wasn't Clark, not really because of what he said, but how he said it. However, short of telling the story in 3rd person, I really don't see how you could have gotten around that. Too Clark-like in his speech and I wouldn't believe the reveal at the end; too Lex-like and it won't sound like Clark. It must have been difficult for you to find the right balance. I think you did an excellent job!

Oooh! More FDK! Sorry that it took a couple of days longer than I'd have liked.

Hi DC!
Michael

Buuuuump…it’s like time travel!

I was poking around last night for short stories to read while stuck half-underneath a sleeping 6-year-old and found this one. I’ll be honest, I read the description and wasn’t sure I was in the mood for a BatP/HoL story…but I was like, I said I would read more stuff by Michael because Don’t You Dare was so awesome and this was only 6kb…so any angst or whatever couldn’t be too bad.

Well… HOODWINKED. I was hoodwinked. And I was a bit peeved (only mildly so) because I don’t like being tricked, so I just HAD to go back and re-read and figure out just how I’d been tricked…and instead of feeling any sort of justified or whatever I was searching for, I was just shaking my head and marveling at how you did it. Like Lynn said, there were one or two lines that were slightly “off” but I just brushed by as “not-perfect” characterization and moved on. Hah! You showed me! WELL DONE, sir!

Sara

Hi Sara!

*Squeeeeee*

erm...

/embarrassed about the 'squeeee'/

Oh, look, FDK!

*squeeeeeee*!!!



Hmm...yes...I certainly need to go and study at the masters' feet on how to do 6kB of angst, too



Thank you! I may not be good at doing card tricks and I promise that I never made Lady Liberty disappear in New Troy harbor, but I do love myself the unreliable narrator. I also read A Song of Ice and Fire the past couple of years before doing this story, so...

Yes, and I dare say, those had been intentional. There was, after all, no reason to have the warden be slightly obese or press home some slightly more arrogant point of view on something. After all, I'm an honestly unreliable narrator.

Thank you, I'm very happy you had fun with this little nugget.

Michael

Very clever, Darth Michael! And very well done!

Thanks for writing this twisted little tale that is still "hoodwinking" (to use KSaraSara's creative description) fans after all these years! It was a fun story.

I look forward to reading more of your work.

Hi Penny,

thanks for dropping me a note! I'm glad you had fun with it

Oh, yes. Me too I also got some (hopefully) entertaining bits on the Archives until then

Michael