Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found Here

My apologies. When I went to post this part last night, literally as I hit the 'send' button, I realized my Internet was down. I only just got it up this morning.

To clarify my "When we last left off..." segment. This scene with Arianna and Lex happens after Lex thinks about how he's trying to ruin Cat Grant's life (that part I trimmed for the re-cap). Originally, it was part of an almost entire part-long Lex POV, but I figured my Readers would like (since they usually demand it) to see Clark during the last part, so I added his scene and Cat's to give you a little breather from Lex's POV. He's back!

The scene with Cat interviewing Toni in jail happens Friday morning between Lois's latest Thursday night dinner with Lex and her date for the opera. Then the final scene with Lois and Lex is Saturday, March 26th, the night of the opera. Please, let me know if that isn't clear by the way it's currently written and I can add in dates. Thanks.

Thank you for reading and I'm sorry about the double delay. I appreciate your comments.

EDIT: I have added in a new short Clark scene (actually brought it forward from Part 126, so it had already been written), to hopefully make a better transition between Rival and FlyHard.

the story posted early.

There was no Clark in this part at all. We left him about to call Lois on what, Thursday morning? What happened there?

I guess you weren't kidding that the last part ended the previous arc, but it seems like it ended without resolving.

We want Clark, we want Clark. You went a whole part without seeing Clark at all. How is that even possible?

The disconnect was so great I went back and made sure I had not missed a part. I was glad we actually saw Lois, more on that later.

that Ariana did not barge in faster. Not that she would be likely to do anything about it, but still.

Proving again that Lex always lies.

Why does Ariana feel any attraction to Lex. This I never really understood.

Does she mean with the female subjects in his L.U.X.?

It took me three readings to realize this was saying she sat away from the desk.

The odd attraction is mutual? This is intriguing.

So he married her for her money.

So he offed his father-in-law. Why am I not surprised? One more person to the body count.

He seems to have already failed at that with Lois.

Maybe this is because he has a twisted understanding of pleasure.

I have to wonder if it is more Lex's interpretation of the phrase that is the problem.

Yep. I think it is Lex's twistedness that is causing the problem.

Lex seems to always have been evil and twisted.

He still is a philandering cad, just because he is not married does not lessen the fact he is a philanderer. Although it probably makes people less outraged about it.

Canon Lois:And he told me that I was the first women who matter to him. The no good liar.

Now that Lois knows that Superman loves her, he has no chance of winning her. Ever.

Lois:I thought it was more that now that I know he is a murdering villain, he has no chance.

Reader:Umm, I think he had no chance long before Lois knew that.

Clark:Where did I put those notes on why this dimension needs to reform commitment laws, like we did on my home world, to make it so major employers can't run mental institutions, and to make it much harder to commit people to mental institutions. Especially when they are actually charged with a crime that under normal circumstaces would at most send them to jail for a few months.

The world is moving exactly on the lines of Another Lois.

How can he have marital rights when they aren't married?

Maybe it is just because of how Lex understands the thing that she has such fear.

Oddly enough, since they got married in international waters by a ship captain, this might actually make sense. Generally weddings performed by a ship captain are not legally binding. Of course, it is possible that this captain was also a license to perform marriages by some specific government, but captains dod not have a right to perform valid marriages by virtue of their office as ship captain.

This phrasing makes her sound like a whore.

Why would anyone agree to these terms.

I don't buy it. I think her "phobia" is more a result of Lex's disturbedness than anything else. My guess on why she agreed was because she assumed there was no way Lex would leave her, since she loved him unconditionally, and so she did not care about what would happen if they divorced.

And maybe without really reading all of them either.

So that is why he sent the clone.

Ari:You touch all of me Lex, can't I just touch a little of your stuff, just this once.

Interesting divorce conditions. Also, why would that be bad exactly? I am surprised that Lex does not propose consummating the relationship on Friday.

I am surprised that he does not propose consummating now, but that would not really give him enough time to carry out his disturbed intention on her.

Now Lex's intentions for what he plans to do to Lois after the opera seem even more disturbed. Although why he thinks he has a chance with a woman he insulted by buying her in an agreement she knew nothing about, not to mention that he shot, is beyond me.

Lois:My plan is working, Lex believes I am attracked to him.

Clark:Lois, why do you want that evil sociopath attracked to you?

More like emotional distrubedness on both sides. This relationship is not healthy for either of them.

Clark: Why does Lois keep on dating that evil man. Why was I so stupid as to turn down a date with her. Maybe if I had gone with her and not Linda she would not be so desperate to be with Luthor. On the other hand, maybe I should start charging for Superman rescues so I can afford to take Lois to a fancy restraint and the opera, if that is what she wants.

Lois:Yes, but those women had not been with Superman.

So he actually has not tested any difficult women against the opera.

Is that the crazy mother of the evil doctor in "Target:Jimmy Olsen".

So much for her claims to believe in marital fidelity.

she was disloyal to her husband. That seems out of character for her.

I guess they were a bit excentric, but excentricity does not usually lead to commitment if the people are rich.

This is just making it more ironic that Lois went ballistic on Clark for supposedly having a relationship with Cat, and yet spent most of the summer dating Luthor, Metropolis's #1 philanderer, who has bedded more women than Clark has even shaken hands with.

They really should have had scenes where Lois testifies before the medical ethics board to get Dieter's license revoked.

Who unlike all the others, Lex has not seduced in any way.

When Lois started to see through Lex's façade to chavanist who dismissed her thoughts underneath.

I am surprised Mindy later Church did not appear on this list. I guess she would not have been a difficult conquest.

Maybe Scardino can show up if word gets out that there is evidence that Revenge is still floating around.

Mrs. Chow:Arthur, why do you react so strongly when I wear this special perfume. I am almost out, and I like when you go irrational for me, how can I get it to happen without the perfume.

Arthyr:Hmm, dear, I love you, but I think it is best we not get too irrational. Maybe we should send this away to get it tested. Some of our help were acting peculiar when you applied that stuff around the place yesterday.

Lex is not a very patient man.

Lois:Well, actually the surprising thing is that his deparved actions have not landed him in jail yet.

Hmm, I guess with his power, he is always able to find willing accomplicies.

Exposing the L.U.X. would definitely undermine his philanthropist image, even if Bender could avoid any actual prison time for him.

I guess that is why he does not propose Friday. Especially since the only way to get her to agree to Friday is to convince her that his arrangement for Saturday is too pressing to cancel. I doubt even if he had no sexual intentions for the meeting with Lois, and it had a clear business purpose, he could convince Ariana it was an acceptable reason to postpone the date.

Considering Lois put two-and-two together on seeing the out-dated but precise copy of her apartment, there is really nothing that Ariana could say that would change Lois's views. Now, maybe if Ariana's statements were brought to the attention of the courts, but not to Lois. Although I guess Lois has managed to hide her true feelings towards Luthor.

He is more disturbed than I thought.

One thing is for sure, I have never felt any sympathy for Lex being tricked by Lois in this story.

Clark:It is Lois being tricked by Lex that worries me. Or killed, maimed, raped, who knows what.

Lois:I do know martial arts.

Clark:I fear it won't be enough, and I won't be fast enough. I am afraid what he intends to do to you Lois.

Lois:He has no chance. I am not going to violate my new rules. And anyway, even if I had never met Clark I would not give myself to such an evil, disturbed philanderer as Luthor.

It seemed to jump quite abruptly to Lex's dinner with Lois Saturday night. It wasn't immediately clear that that was what was going on. I thought that Lois's observations about Nigel were just general statements of her opinion, not current observations. It would help to have some short lead-in to that section that clarifies that we've jumped a few days and who is in the room.

I'm more and more appalled by Lex's behavior and attitudes towards women. He's not just a normal, evil villain. He's a sick, amoral, demented monster. I don't usually see him portrayed to be quite this bad, even when he is shown to view women as expendable playthings. Ari is surprisingly gullible. I wonder what's at the root of her phobia, but I get the feeling that I don't really want to know.

Regarding Lois getting a LoLex watch instead of the same kind as the other women, I figure this is another reflection of his obsession with her. Since there's no Rolex for him to have patterned the name after, I figure it's a combination of Lois and Lex.

I wonder how long Lex has had surveillance at the DP and whether anyone will find it. These cameras and microphones have to be stashed somewhere.

Due to popular demand , I have moved forward a small section of a scene from Part 126, which will hopefully be a better transition into Saturday night and also included Clark. It's less than two double spaced pages worth of material, and is located between the Cat scene and final scene.

Lois is probably lucky that Clark comes from a dimension with rolex. If he did not have that distraction, he would have caught onto the Lois + Lex aspect of the name, and be demanding even more that she give back the watch.

Only Lex would be so arrogant as to think this possible.

I guess since he is a clone, it will be hard for Lois to tell the difference. Although I doubt that will be the main reason people won't be able to tell.

Maybe Lois can trip the cone into revealing incriminating information. we are not dating. Cat of all people knows that.

Well, Toni is half right. Of course after seeing Charlie and Lola in the supply closet that is not surprising. I say half right because Toni is delusional to think that Charlie was ever her beau.

She is really racking them up. I don't think Clark could have puled off this many lies.

Only if she can expedite the process of sending Luthor to prison. Which, does not seem a likely outcome of proving Luthor is having relations with lots of women. Even if she can prove relations with Toni Taylor, that is not proving criminal action. Especially if Lois won't press charges for soliciting a prostitute. Lois really should have pressed charges. It would have opened up an inquiry into how involved in the Metro gangs activities Luthor was.

I almost want to say Lois's failure to press charges, especially since it prevented Luthor getting caught up in the dragnet that presumably resulted from Taylor's arrest, could be construed as a form of obstruction of justice.

I knew Lois should have left the lunch immediately on having dismissed the lawyer.

Lois:Toni's selling me is not at all related to this lunch.

Cat:And a womanizer who pays for the services of ladies of the night, which is illegal in this town.

With the amount of watches we have seen in this story, maybe it should be renamed to "wrong watch".

Clark:Sounds good to me.

Reader:See if you were not such a wrong Clark, you would get Lois a right watch.

So Toni, Toni, Miranda and Monique all had the same watch. Maybe Cat should scan various living people to see if any of them have The Watch. Lois can't be the only women Lex is using right now.

Lois:Especially since he is not getting his sexual desires met by me.

Although, since presumably all the people who knew about that had just died in an explosion as well, the discovery is probably not what prompted her death.

Yes, why is being saved be Superman unfortunate.

I see, it would have been a much less painful way to die if she had just splatted on the ground.

Considering what we have known for some time Lex did to Monique, nothing revealed in this part really adds to his disturbeness. Although just being exposed to him so much is disturbing.

Cat:The evidence for the last part is not clear.

But would people debase their pure love by commercializing it?

I guess he did have to put on a façade with Toni and not be his unsually overdominating and abuse self.

TOni:Just because Luthor was at the club multiple times does not mean I met with him. I mean, I was only head for a short time. Maybe other times he talked with Johnny.

I think maybe it should be "under a watchful eye".

Of course that assumes they do not just categorically deny recognizing anyone.

Lois:It won't embarrass me, it will relieve me. Then I will able to be with Clark all I want. At least as much as his lunkheaded, overly close following of the law allows.

Why does she keep going off to be with Luthor.

Maybe Luthor gives those out to some of his paramours. Or maybe he meets these ladies himself or has one of his trusted assistants with a key meet them.

But maybe the people who are on duty when the lady of the night shows up are chosen because they are good at denying recognition.

So the trusted assitants/Lex himself method is how it is done.

At first I was like "what is with him driving her from the airport to the Metro Club", then I realized that the "in the middle of the night" is about when she was returned to the club, not the whole thing.

Oh, I guess it was both in the middle of the night. Luthor's limo driver could be a key source of information.

This won't be enough to convict him. Drinking wine with a lady, even one who operates a prostitution racket as Toni did, still is not criminal.

But even if she could prove Toni dated Lex, it would not really do much to get him arrested.

I guess this would expose Lex as disturbing, but unless they can prove the tracers are used, criminal would be pretty hard.

Since Lois already knows, they would be making a lot more progress if they worked closer on this investigation.

I still wish she would only wear things like that to be with me.

Reader:Clark, you have no one to blame but yourself. You are the one who turned down a chance to spend the weekend with Lois.

Maybe Lex has become addicted to revenge and is still using it.

Somehow I think Lois is the only person who could possibly thing this is not a date.

she is beginning to see through his façade. I seem to be using that word a lot.

Except for the times when he is overtly so.

Why does she put up with those from him?

I still think this whole undercover with Luthor plan was stupid. She has been doing it almost a month and learned virtually nothing.

Because it is like the "conference call" her father would have with Mrs. Belcanto.

she is going to go into Lex's office and actually learn something. At least I can hope.

I am glad we got the extra part in 125, because 126 seems to have been delayed. Hope everything is alright Virginia. I am loving this story.

Sorry, John. Yes, Part 126 has been delayed because once again, I wasn't able to finish Part 131 due to some writer's block, some birthday parties, and some out-of-town guests who insist on me being a host instead of a writer. ( ) but it needed several rewrites to get it just right, so that also delayed and slightly changed the direction of Part 131. Just to totally confuse you with vague information that won't make sense until you get to that part of the story. (or maybe that should be )

So, Readers, let me know if you want a more stable or random posting schedule or if you don't care JUST FINISH THE DARN THING ALREADY, V!

My vote is to keep the current schedule, but I am not really particular either way.

John: Hi! The *WORLD*.

CLARK: Great. Just give her ideas now. <<dials phone>> Dr. Friskin? It's Clark Kent again.

LEX: You don't know that.
LOIS: What?!
CLARK: It's Lex. HE's lying.
LOIS: Maybe he is. Maybe he isn't.
CLARK: I hate that guy.

Why would Lex spend money on women who are easy?

LEX: What? I like a challenge.

Eccentric people who KILL people can get committed by other VERY rich people

Well, Lex is older and has no morals; therefore he's more experienced.

LEX: So, on the difficulty challenge level she's 15 on a 10 point scale. She's also a work in progress.

LOIS: Gross!

So, Lois wasn't spending any more time with Lex and he needed to occupy his... time.

She came into power AFTER Lex died.

What? You want him to show up already and make this triangle/square into a hexagon?

CLARK: Oh, God! Not him!

LOIS: Dan? HE's *so* last story.

no.

Money buys power and influence, plus it's part of the challenge for Lex.

Oh, not necessarily. As of right this moment. He's only had sex with one member of the LUX.

Yes. But Lex doesn't know that's how Lois feels about him, he thinks she likes him so he doesn't want to do anything that would change her mind. Even something simple like cancel a date.

That's good. Phew.

LOIS: Give me some credit.
CLARK: I wish it were that easy, Lois.

She might say that now, but we know better from canon. It was because this Clark made her take a second look at Lex early enough in their relationship that she didn't fall for Lex's swarmy ways.

More later...

mrsMxyzptlk: Thanks for dropping in to comment.
My newly added Clark scene does a bit to bridge the shift in time, but I'll still work on something more concrete to end Rival, but probably not until I finalize my Archives version, about the time I fix Lois not being freaked out by Miranda's dead body.

Yes, I did make Lex a bit sick and demented. I left Ari's phobia vague for that very reason.

Hmmmm. Interesting theory.

Well, nobody picked them up the first time until Clark deliberately went to look for them. They were installed recently... about the time as her home ones were installed.

Thanks for your comments.

-- Continuation of Response to John's FDK -- WELLS: Nothing is impossible.

It wasn't her story, she was busy investigating Lex, dealing with the news that her partner had been lying to her since Day 1, the missing kidnapped kids, and stressing about Linda being in town.

There were the Japanese twins, the cheerleader, Toni Taylor, and Monique Kahn as well, specifically implied. And possibly the woman who bought Superman at the auction.

Thanks. Fixed.



I seriously doubt that, but Alice probably raked him over the coals about a lack of a professional work environment.

Hooker name for undercover work.

CAT: Lois is a big girl. She's always telling us how she can take care of herself. I was letting her do just that. It's not my job to 'big sister' her. Clark didn't have any expectations that Toni would visit his home address on his employment records (most bosses don't).

LEX: It was only a suggestion... I never forced myself on her.

LOIS: See! Any charges I brought upon him would have been dropped anyway. Anyway, he said he was trying to help me. :rolleyes: Men!

There was this line from Part 43 , implying that he had:

He didn't know if Lois knew she had been "sold" to Luthor, and figured since Lois didn't believe anything he told her about Luthor anyway, why just oil to the fire. True, it wasn't the smartest thing to do...

Toni meant six long months surrounded by women, without handsome man flesh to look at, not that she had actually touched Clark (Charlie).

Because Clark isn't stupid enough to have his entire life (professional and personal) revolve around Lois. She wouldn't care for it, and it would make him miserable if he catered to her every fear on his behalf. Lois being jealous of Linda, Toni, or Cat is Lois's problem, not his. He hasn't done anything wrong.

Clark, Lois, and Linda are currently dealing with Carpenter and Secretary Wallace's assignation attempt while Cat is visiting Toni in prison. So, as far as Cat knows Clark is still undercover at the Met Star.

That would be "no". It was implied. Although, clearly, the Readers are begging for me to add in a passage for the Archive version.

CAT: Hence "eye" candy. Candy, one isn't allowed to touch. Duh!

Here it was Superman (see above quote from Part 43).

CAT: Sure, it is.

CAT: Right. And Lois has never lied to get in good with a possible source?

LOIS: I'll take that bet. Hey, look. <<shows her tally sheet>> I won.

CLARK:

CAT: Who said I was working to get Lex in jail? I'm a "society columnist". I report gossip. Lex sleeping with all these criminals types, that's gossip. It's Lois's job to prove it makes him a criminal himself, *she's* the investigative reporter. That's *her* job. My job is just to prove he's a lying slimebucket and get people talking about it.

CAT: Hey, if she's going to swim with sharks, she's going to have to deal with being a labeled a shark herself, even by those who know she's just a porpoise.

Lois is trying not to scare him off or make him angry, all the while still keeping him on the line.

TONI: That's what I call a high ranking businessman or corporate CEO or CFO.

CAT: Close enough.

when it angers her boss.

CAT: Yes. From a certain point of view.
CLARK: What? No!
CAT: <<reminds him what happened to Ms. Kahn>>
CLARK: Still... No. Neither is a good way to die.

LEX: I must object to that statement. I haven't exposed myself to any Readers during this story.

TONI: If a man is MORE turned on by one of my girls and CAN'T stop himself from wanting her, he'll pay even more to possess her.
LOIS: Lovely. She's a ray of sunshine for women's rights, isn't she?

As in canon, this Lex told her that if she breathed a word about what she knew about his illegal activities she wouldn't live to speak a second word.

Yes, thanks. Fixed.

CAT: I know body language better than most. I can tell when someone lies to me, especially men. The women, I don't care that much about.

Embarrassing Lois is the carrot she's dangling in front of Toni.

CAT: Scandal isn't a crime.

There might be another explanation as well.

The less people with knowledge Lex's personal pleasure activities, the better.

Except when he's Asabi and is well paid not to speak about his boss.

If Cat could prove that Lois and one criminal and three murdered people could be connected to Lex via the tracer watches, there would be a pattern of behavior, which could possibly link Lex to those murders. If not, it would really embarrass him, be a great scandal, sell newspapers.

-- Continuation of Response to John's FDK --

Which is why he's doing so.

TEMPUS: I love the irony.
LEX: Well, I only use it second hand.

LOIS: I'm using him. I don't want his money, I don't want his body. I want him arrested and tried for being a super bad guy. How is that a date?

CLARK: Because you're going to the opera with him and ate dinner with him.

LOIS: Well, other than those parts.

LOIS: <<eying Pulitzer>>

A good investigation usually takes months not days, especially with someone as slick as Luthor.

Hey, I was trying to be positive.

But the way Clark brought in Lois was different.

I mainly just want the Lois/Clark on the phone conversation.

Not if he just married her for her money.

I am just glad Lois joins in the wallbash.

Clark:I am still worried. If he feels an emotional connection to Lois, things might get ugly.

That is probably the easiest way to make the story work.

I thought that was more Gretchen's idea.

Well, it is possible that Lex has been with Lana. It is not unprecedented.

Wait, did they kill before breaking out Bad Brain Johnson?

Clark:It still seems I am always held to a higher standard than everyone else.

Actually, with Linda it is more like a pentagon, at least since Clark still is jealous of himself with regards to Lois.

I was more thinking along the lines of keeping a large number of people as prisoners, not on the harem aspect.

Although, even in canon she never "gives herself to" Lex, and backs out of the marriage before she knows anything of his crime. Altoough I guess since that is because she realizes she loves Clark, it is hard to totally say she would not fall for him in a Clark free world.

And as we saw in "Double Jeopardy", even when cloning has been known to be possible for years (at least to those directly involved) and has been under investigation by said person for the last few weeks, they still do not consider it, even when everything screams out "this is not Lois".

Lois:Unfaithfulness starts a lot earlier than sleeping. Anyway, why did the lunkhead ever give Toni his real address. He should have given a fake address when getting an undercover job.

What cheerleader? I don't remember a cheerleader. I think I only noticed the Japanese twins because of this story. I never though Monique Kahn was implied, but maybe I just miss such implications.

Ooooooh!
LEX: Wrong story.

Such as: Lois spreads her legs for Lex and he lets her parents and sister live?

Maybe he should build a boss-switch into the door latch so his monitor gets automatically switched to Stock-TV when someone opens the door?

Which is why he stopped divorcing his wives Henry-VIII style and started disposing them Henry-VIII style.
LEX: No, I founded the religion for tax reasons, not so I could get a divorce from Ari. I could have gotten that from the church based on that they don’t recognize marriages to the wives of Satan in the first place.

Isn’t he a fortunate boy?

Maybe she had already invented Revenge v1?

Doesn’t seem to work. /points at Lex’s obsession with Superman/

Couldn’t he spray her on another day and see if it works? If it doesn’t, no harm done. And if it does, he could keep her under permanently.

ARI: Daddy always said that it’s a sin to do that with my college roommate, so I stuck to men. It’s not my fault I find them icky.

Awwwwwww

Maybe if he had her tongue cut out and her fingers broken?
LEX: Don’t be stupid, I could just paralyze her vocal cords, shine a red light into her eyes, and puncture her eardrums.

Well, he could expedite the schedule?
LOIS: Why do I suddenly feel the urge for sushi? Lex, I’d love me some fresh *OCTOPUS*!
SUPERMAN: No, officer, I have no idea why there is a Luthor-shaped goo-smudge on the wall.

I can’t have that divorce be final.

Maybe they shouldn’t have invited a whack-job?

Maybe if he let him out, then irradiated him until his tongue falls out, then sent him back down so he could die a very horrible, very visible death by turning to bloody goo in the main hall?

Oooh! Just like in Die Hard with a Vengeance.

Isn’t that illegal?

Awwww…he is sooo creepy!

Just like Ari does, huh?
ARI: I never give him perfume so he smells like my uncle.

Will she still be able to walk straight?

/whispers/ Maybe ‘rewards that came’ instead?

TBC

Michael

I think that should be "after he learned of her".

I think this comes from inprecise usages of some terms. The term involved often just means "loose" and does not always imply that the person is involved in selling herself.

Quite true. I think the selling part is actually quite minor to the word as it is used these days. But it does carry a trashy undertone and having no principles about who she has sex with and I can't see the Cat Virginia is displaying as thinking of herself that way. She is more of the female equivalent to Casanova. She is proud of the conquest, not for giving it up to any man with a pulse.

RALPH: Michael

Thank you. I appreciate all the good vibes I can get. <<currently hiding from Part 140 FDK>>

Slightly different. There was no Perry hiding in the closet scene.
PERRY: For which, I am appreciative. By the way, Kent, why does your closet smell smokey?

But as you know, even I get them talking, they won't talk, right?

I figured his relationship with Ari was just enough screwed up to tip him over the edge between self-absorbed and greedy to evil and controlling. I'm of the camp that kids aren't born evil, but they are made that way by circumstances within their lives.

/rubs hands/ Did someone say they wanted to see Lex get ugly?

It takes two evil geniuses to raise the dead.

THIS dimension's Lana has never met Lex Luthor.

I don't know. The Lakes seemed a bit blasé with his murder for it to have been their first.

Darth Michael: Thanks for being patient.
Yes, and this isn't called the "Wrong Story".

LOIS: /considers the consequences/ Nah. Let'em die. They'd prefer it that way.

LEX: Nigel! You heard the man. Set it up immediately.

Are you suggesting that there have been other Mrs. Luthor's between Arianna and now?
ARI:

LEX: /rocking back and forth on his heels/ I believe so.

She's not the chemistry major.

Umm... Okay.
SUPERMAN: Where's that uzi?

Don't worry, he retracts the thought.

JUDGE: /pockets money/ I rule for Ari Carlin, because she didn't know that her husband would use her words so loosely.

Dr. M: Yeah. An automatic.
ARI: Wait! Lex! Not with the hired help.
DR. M: Ex-cuse me!

LEX: Well, duh!

ARI: But my husband bought it from your stable, which is why it has that interesting bouquet.
VIZIER: Off! Off my property, madame!

LEX:
GHOST OF MIRANDA: I invented it without any intellectual contribution from Lex.

/having seen Joss Wheadon's Dollhouse/ Yes, I could see hear her suggesting it in this manner.

Exactly.

LEX: But I built a mental institution just for her!

LEX: /shrugs/ Maybe not that much.

Perhaps he did care for her after all.

ARI: My Daddy never understood me.

Perhaps.

ARI: So, am I allowed to break your things as long as I don't touch them?

MRS. COX: /suddenly takes two week long vacation/

I couldn't make life too easy for him.

Lois or Ari?

LEX: I'll be ruler of the world in a few years. I don't need unnecessary partnerships to make it happen.

LEX: Nigel, go hire than nice young man to take over your job. It appears you're up for retirement.

No, I didn't really want to go into too much detail on Ari's diversion.

But he likes it when she screams.



Oh, wait. Then he wouldn't show up to the opera.

Thankfully, Lex hasn't introduced Lex-C to Mrs. Cox yet, so he doesn't know what he's missing.

LEX: Don't be ridiculous, Lois. I'd never be convicted, let alone arrested.

Gee, I wonder how many times he's said that.

Previously undiagnosed.

NIGEL:

That's the one in NYC, right? Hmmm. Was that the scene where the pretty woman could fight?

LEX: /looks at Laws for the New Dawn as Written by Lex Luthor/ No.

Awwww. Thanks.

Right. With men it would be cologne.

No.

Thanks. Fixed.

-- Continuation of Response to Darth Michael's FDK --
Good point. If she didn't call the dress "slutty", what would she call it? Revealing?

Yes, Cat sees herself as 'fun' and 'party girl' not willing to sleep with anyone.
RALPH: Oh, wait, you didn't mean me?

Does that mean stuffed in a hole? Then, yes.

I think Ari might notice.

LOIS: Totally didn't get that.

LEX: Well, my doctor did recommend more fiber.
DR. M:

LOIS: Yes.
CLARK: What?!
LOIS: I'm sorry. Yes, refreshing. 'No' to getting out of my panties.
LEX:

LOIS: Silly me! That makes more sense than dating him!
CLARK: Um... yeah.
PERRY: Sorry, Lois, there's no funds in the DP expense budget right now for expensive bugging equipment.
LOIS: Oh, well, I guess I'll go with risky then.
LEX: I like risque`.
CLARK: That's not what she said. Anyway, couldn't you just use the stuff found in our apartments last summer?
HENDERSON: I'm sorry, that's in the evidence vault.
LOIS: /remembers what else is in the evidence vault/
EW: Hmmm. That would have made for an interesting twist.

CLARK: But what would a hostage situation at the DP be like without Lois?
LOIS: Hostage? What are you talking about?
CLARK: Ooops. Sorry, that didn't happen in this dimension?

Oh my.





Maybe Lois should look into the rampant corruption in the judicial system after all.



Yes, but financial. And inventions are always contributed to the smart businessmen who funded the research, not the halfwits who did the research.
LEX: That’s what my patent lawyers say.

(has only heard about the show, though. Is on to-do list somewhere)

Yes, but you don’t eat where you…well…not eat.

Lex?
LEX: Nah, I was just way too wasted to think about that back then.

Should have become a politician.

Money can’t buy happiness?

Lois.

And thus another would-have-been-successful plan to take over the world was foiled by the mutual delusions of grandeur of the involved parties.

/makes note not to shake the butler’s hand without gloves and not to take drink or food from him.

She’s the screaming type?

No, I was referring to the clone, hence the twins-graemlin.

Dr. M: /pulls out study records/

It was a bit bloody but very well executed as far as tempo and score went.

Right. My bad.
LOUIS XIV: It is called perfume. And I am very much a man. /has some minion powder his nose some more/

Yeah. Or adventurous.



Michael

I know I might regret it, but I have to ask. Which episode was this?

NeverEnding Battle before Lois gives Clark the little pep-talk about how the world needs Superman. (It's also the same episode with the Japanese twins.)

Maybe Clark should.

LEX: It's next door.

FLASHBACK...
ARI: Lex, have you met my best friend Miranda? She's a chemist.

LEX: President Lex...

LOIS: It might, but it can't buy me.
LANA: It can buy me!
LINDA: And me!
MRS. COX: I wouldn't say 'no' to a little of the green stuff every once and a while.

Oh, darn.

But Ari has met Lex-C.

Blood seems prerequisite these days.

These days, it's called cologne.

CAT: I dressed Adventurously to the woman's prison? Hmmmm. I've never done it here. /looks around/ I think I will pass.

That's not a nickname, but her given name, which is why she goes by Valdez.

LOIS: But I didn't do anything with you!
LEX: That you can remember.
LOIS: What?
CLARK: *What?*

And here I thought porn stars did it for love of film. Silly me.

JONATHAN: She wouldn't open it, Martha. It's addressed to Jerome. That would be mail fraud.

LOIS: /points to new 3 rules/ That's a no-no.

Michael

LEX: Ooops?

But how many of them are suggested by the poorer spouse?
LOIS: You think I want him to have rights to anything I've ever written? Hell, no!


CLARK: Whoa. Hold on! Did I agree to that? I don't think so.
SUPERMAN: There won't be much sleeping involved.

Michael