Okay, a semi-evil place to end, I know, but I couldn't help it. A lot happened in this section. Thoughts? Opinions? Ideas?

Thanks,
Annie

Annie,
First off, I've been really looking forward to Playing for Keeps since the end of Playing to Win and now it's finally here. Yay! I was so glad to see this up tonight. It made my day! I love how the relationship is going at this point. Also, I love how Clark met her at class. How cute! I'm also glad that Lois knows the truth early on in the story. I'm really looking forward to reading the rest and seeing everything develops!!

Becki

I was expecting it, but I still ended up feeling stunned by that line. Whoa!

More soon please.

OOooh! Wondeful cliff hanger! Very well written, realistic dialogue and great revelation

Eek! Well first of all, it makes me want to re-read the other two. Second, and more importantly, eek! What happens now??!! Does she get mad?! Does she cry?! Does she kick him out?!

JD

wow, you're posting PFK!

i haven't been reading very much these days (some fluff, BRing non-l&c stuff for a few good writers who happen to be friends, and some stories for the archive keyword project), but when i saw PFK was up, i had to go see.

i'm really glad i did.

you really know how to make sparks fly between them, don't you?

then, just as we're really used to things being all sweet and waffy and stuff, you bring in superman. the robe line was a great touch. more, tho, i love the interaction... clark's fear, lois's changed feelings, clark's self-admonition and determination...

i especially like this:

i like it all the more because, shortly before i read it, my eyes caught the fact that he said simply "thank you" and then left. i was afraid he'd chickened out, but that is a darned good reason, and very insightful, too. it's also original (in my reading experience, anyway), and that's not easy these days when it comes to revelations.

otoh (in terms of clark being insightful and such), there's this:

gee.. way not to scare her, clark.

can't wait to see lois's reaction.

while i'm writing... a couple of very minor typeos and things:

i expect you meant "times."

"lingering on"

i think there may have been one or two others (a few always get through...), but i can't seem to find them again. <shrug>

anyway, great to see you posting this! looking forward to more (and what do you mean, we only get 4 parts? ).

Paul

Annie,

I don't think I've ever had a chance to read one of your posted stories as it develops, though I'm a big fan of your work on the archive.

Just a few things that I really enjoyed and that made this different for me:

Paul touched on this one. The idea that Superman is a stranger to her, so he shouldn't be the one to tell her who Clark Kent is. I love that! We know he really thinks this, and yet so often we see the revelation coming from Superman. This was thoughtful in an original way, and also, illuminated the distance between Lois and Superman that has to be there before anything with Lois and Clark can happend.

Trying not to ramble, but just this other thing. Love the "I'm Kryptonian." Because his alieness, rather than his Supermanness, has always been with him. It makes such good sense that starting from the beginning like he did, the spaceship found in the field and so forth, that he would say that rather than "I'm Superman."

So I just adore how you turned that around. He's practicing to the picture, using the word Superman, but in the conversation he goes to what is most real for him.

Whew! Too wordy, sorry.

Can't wait to see more, Annie. And thanks for saying you'll post every day. So nice!

CC

Annie, you have no idea how excited I was to see that you've started posting this story. I love the first two stories in the series, and was just about bouncing out of my chair when I saw 'Playing for Keeps, part 1' as a thread.

This didn't disappoint. WAFFy and wonderful and well-written, and then to end it when you ended it.... Let's just say that to wait two days for more is really, really cruel!

Looking forward to part 2... and 3... and 4!

Irene

I have been waiting for this. But now it's not "playing", it's real thing, right?

I remember that you promised to tell how Jimmy and Perry reacted to Lois and Clark's dating.

It was high time for Clark to tell, Lois was having doubts why Clark was running away.

Did Lois really understand from this that Clark is Superman or that there are other Kryptonians on the Earth?

YAY!!! You're posting Playing for Keeps!!

Superman's visit was really poignant and wistful - poor guy was devastated for a moment, but I love the way Lois rescued the situation. And it makes a lot of sense that he should tell her as Clark, not as Superman.

And then the revelation... I've read a lot of explanations for why Clark didn't tell Lois sooner, but somehow this one really resonates with me:
I think it's his uncertainty, his humility - that's what does it for me. He's not defensive or accusing. He's stating facts, simply and carefully, and explaining how it affected him. And I can't see how Lois's heart wouldn't melt at this!

Oh, one thing I've just noticed from posting that extract - you have Word's autocorrect function messing around with your ellipses. They look fine in your post and in mine, but it didn't in the posting window, which is what alerted me. When you send this to the archive the ellipses will turn into one . - so you might want to fix that before submitting the story.

Anyway, can't wait for MORE!!


Wendy

Nah

But they went into serious matters quickly!!!

waiting the next part, Annie!!

Jose

Boy, Annie, when you're not gone from FOLCdom, you're really not gone! <g>

I adore this and can't wait for more.

PJ

YAY!
That's all I'll say for now!

Great job, Annie. I haven't read the other two prequel stories to this, but still you've managed to show me the emotions so well that I'm picking up where these two are in their new relationship perfectly. And your references to their time spent in Washington DC is certainly teasing me to go read the other stories.

I like how Clark presented his past to Lois as a buildup for the real confession. Kind of easing her into it in hopes that it will make the truth easier to swallow. That he didn't just present it as "I'm Superman" but that there was a history involved. And like others, my favorite line has to be the "I'm not a NASA experiment. I'm Kryptonian." I think this is destined to become a classic.

I'm looking forward to the rest. Really enjoying this.

Lynn

Wow Annie this is great. I read the other two stories to refresh my memory. I am really looking forward to more. laura

I'm an A-plot junkie, Annie, so I wasn't sure I'd enjoy this. But you had some really lovely touches, particularly (as others have mentioned) Clark backing off from telling her as Supes and telling her as himself. I also like that, for a change, one character didn't open mouth and insert foot at the worst possible second. (Can you tell my feelings towards forced angst? )

I confess that I found Lois' cluelessness a bit forced. C'mon, Lois: he's telling you his parents found him in a capsule, and you still don't make the connection? Although if your Lois never envisioned a secret id for Superman, the idea might never enter her head, I suppose. So I guess I should forgive her.

Lovely beginning, Annie. Looking forward to MORE!

Hazel

Hi,

Great start.

Poor Lois can process all that babble.

Annie, I am really glad you've finally written this . I've been waiting for it for a long time! I love this part and I'm looking forward to the rest of the story.


- Laura
(sorry the comments are so short . . . gotta get back to work )

LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!!!!

oh, by the way... I LOVE THIS STORY!

couldn't wait...had almost forgot about it being in the works (ALMOST)...loved the first two prequels...

although
WHY NOT EVERY DAY? OR ALL AT ONCE!??!!?? I'm gonna go bonkers getting this in spurts

please, take pity on me...and i'm sure a few more of us who are secretly dying for more!!!

mor1980

Actually she's still tweaking the later sections, so the every other day thing is to give her trusty BR companion (just call me Rex ) enough time to read through the updated versions as they hit my mailbox.

Kathy (who gets nearly as excited reading comments for a story she's BRed as she does for one of her own, LOL)

This is terrific, just what we expected from you.

Aww, Annie, I love the first two stories, I love that you're posting this one now, and I love this first part in general. I love how couple-ish they're acting at the beginning, and I love Clark's decision to tell her about himself the way he did.

The thing I do not love is the fact that you're only posting every other day <g>. However, I'm going to take a deep breath and be strong.

Great first section, and I can't wait for more!

Tracey (repeating 'I can wait patiently, I can wait patiently' over and over again <g>)

That really was a cruel place to end this segment. Bring more! More! I really loved it- although if I knew this was a sequal to PtW I would have referred there first . *impatiently* What happens next?

Julie

Annie

I'm so glad you're posting this.
It's wonderful! I love the revelation.

I can't wait to read the next part.
I'm enjoying this immensely.

Tricia

I loved your first two stories Annie and this one has me hooked already!

Can't wait for part 2.. Oh goody..that's TODAY!!

~Liz

yes TODAY...
WAIT!

PRETTY PLEASE?
mor1980

OK...BORED AND really WANT THIS STORY POSTED...

11:35PM Dhaka (Where the heck is that?)
12:35 AM Jakarta
1:35 AM Manila

so...hmmmm past midnight in Asia... gettin there in India....
All info provided by the online world clock...

mor1980
(you can imagine what i'm like on New Year's Eve...)

LOL, flattered as I am, the reason I can't post until midnight has nothing to do with me holding out. I'm at work where I have access to the internet, but not access to my harddrive where the story is stored. I might be able to post a little earlier than midnight, depending on what time I get home from work, etc. But I definitely can't post now.

Thanks to everyone for the wonderful feedback. I'll reply in detail tonight when I get home from work.

Thanks!
Annie

I'm glad you finished so soon. I was surprised when I saw it on the board because I wasn't expecting it until later this year. Great job on the first part and I can't wait until I read the rest of the story.

Annie,
I'm glad you are posting this
loved it-hate the cliffhanger
well done and waffy
merry

WELL.... Me thinks you should start taking advice from Clark and back things up on disk so you can TAKE THEM WITH YOU TO WORK heh heh heh

but alas, i am not the boss of you (if i were, you'd have this story posted yesterday and in ONE piece...maybe if i harass KATHY, she'll BR it faster....hmmmmmmm)

can't wait,
mor1980
PS-watch me fall asleep before you post...lol

Wow, Annie, seems like someone really loves this story . Hooray!

(I think you should wait until after Nov 17th to post the rest . . . just so I actually have time to read it )

- Laura

Hey! I stayed up till 2 am last night to get part 2 back to her by this morning! It's not my fault she had to work late. <g>

Kathy

LOL! Okay, okay. I'm here. (and flattered <G>)

Thanks so much, everyone, for all the wonderful feedback. I'm so glad y'all like it so far.

Thanks to everyone who commented on the "I'm not a NASA experiment, Lois. I'm Kryptonian." line. It's one of my favorite lines from this story, and I'm glad other people liked it too.

I'm so glad everyone seemed to like Clark's rationale for not telling her the truth as Superman. That's something I felt really strongly about in this case. I always prefer the revelation to come from Clark, but especially in cases where he and Lois are already dating.

and
First, as you'll see very quickly in the next section, it doesn't take Lois long at all to put the pieces together. To me, her offering alternatives besides Clark being Superman is logical for two reasons. First, she's in denial. I think that Lois has really known the truth for a long time, but just didn't want to put the pieces together. Second, like everyone else at this point, Lois assumes that Superman only came to Earth about a year ago. She's not thinking about Superman coming to Earth as a baby.

Thanks, Paul. That was one of those lines that wrote itself. She was standing in front of the open window and I was like, "I bet she's cold. She should get a robe." And, bam, I realized the implications.

Ah, nope. <G> This time they're "playing for keeps" meaning it's no longer a just a game.

Okay, there are a million more things I want to comment on, but I have a feeling that you'd all rather I shut up and post part two.

Let's see, shall we?

Thanks again!
Annie

Annie, I LOVED this as much as I Loved all the "previews" I was fortunate enough to get to read!!! Your are an amazing talent!!!

S (who will leave more specific feedback tonight after I read part 2 today -- yay it's posted)