Part 11
Totally shocked and flabbergasted didn't even begin to describe how Clark felt when he saw his mother and Lois sitting at their booth, apparently having a great time. His mom, in her brightly colored Superman shirt and his baseball cap, was someone he almost didn't recognize. Her mission to take care of Lois appeared to have been a success, and he was glad his girlfriend's earlier mood seemed to have disappeared.
Yet, it was terrifying to think what had taken place in his absence. His mom and Lois were awfully happy to see him – too happy, he thought with a slight falter of his voice as he greeted the crowd. Judging from the condition of their table, the scattered dishes and drink glasses, they hadn't lacked for anything to do. What was even crazier was that he wasn't sure which one of his guises his mother had revealed herself to Lois. Had she told Lois she was Clark's mother or Kal's mom?
"Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming tonight," Clark began semi-automatically, making himself forget Lois for just a while in order to get through his speech. "This fundraiser is in honor of a little girl named Jessie Adler who died in a tragic situation. Even though I was on the scene in an instant, I couldn't save her, and..." Clark grew passionate in his speech, relaying how even he with his superpowers had not been able to save a desperately injured child.
"This fund raiser is for all those innocent children who just might have a chance at life." Clark felt a catch in his throat but knew the healing over Jessie's death had finally begun. "We can all be heroes in this endeavor..."
As the audience began applauding, Clark instinctively sought to find Lois and his eyes almost bugged out of his head. His mother and Lois' arms were looped over each other's shoulders, Lois had his baseball cap on backwards and was pointing wildly at his mother with her other hand, making a swooping motion that resembled flying.
Oh, no! It was worse than he thought, but he had no idea how to find out what was going on in his private life in this very public place. Suddenly, the crowd was converging upon him, seeking to touch him and get his autograph. He had to play host for just a while longer before getting to the bottom of Lois and his mother.
*****
After her quick mood change, Lois found herself rather down again after Kal's speech. It had been fun to pretend to be a Superman groupie with his mom – the secret they shared had set them apart from all the other people in the place. Too soon though, her happy mood had dissipated as she observed Kal. For a while, he seemed rather lost, as though he had been looking for someone who wasn't there.
Maybe he was looking for the Trollop, she thought glumly. Surely that woman wouldn't overlook an event as important to Kal as this, even if she was just stringing him along. If that was the case, then she probably was here, right under her nose!
Turning to Martha, she pasted on a smile and impulsively hugged her. "Thank you so much for sticking with me while I was sorting out my messy emotions."
"You're quite welcome, dear. I just couldn't stand to leave you alone knowing who you were. Hope you didn't mind this old busybody sticking her nose in where it doesn't belong."
"I'd probably still be drowning my sorrows if you hadn't come along."
"If you are sure you're going to be okay, then I'd better scoot. I hate to leave you, but Kal's dad is over on the other side waiting for me. I just hope he isn't trying to run the place now."
"I think ice cream is an antidote for alcohol. I feel fine now, but I promise I won't drive anywhere – I took a taxi here."
"Make Kal take you to visit us sometime – no pressure, but we'd love to have you come visit."
After promising to twist Kal's arm, Lois hugged Martha once more and watched as she disappeared into the crowd. A steely and determined look etched its way onto her face as she surveyed the crowd with a new purpose in mind – finding Kal's trollop.
She didn't think that anyone who was Kal's girlfriend would be so blatantly obvious as to hang around with the Superman groupies. No, she would probably stay along the outer perimeters of the crowd, perhaps even gloating that she was the one who had Superman all to herself.
A quick inventory of the booths along the wall only revealed couples and groups of women patiently waiting their turn to ogle Kal. This woman, if her instincts served her correctly, would be a loner.
She wished she had grilled Kal for more information about his mystery woman. But there was that danged promise to keep his identity a secret. Looking back over the last year, she wished she had had the foresight to have taken him up on his offer to know his secret months ago. Maybe things would have turned out differently.
At last the crowd was breaking up, and Lois had yet to pinpoint any Trollop candidates. What kind of woman was this anyway, not showing any support for Kal? He had said that this woman didn't return his feelings, so maybe she didn't care enough for him to even show up at his fundraiser. It could be that Kal was right when he said that his love for this woman was only one-sided. Suddenly feeling a bit lighter, Lois smiled in relief. Perhaps it wasn't too late after all.
Kal left the stage, heading towards the kitchen and Lois thought this would be a perfect time to wave him down and say hello. It wouldn't look too suspicious – no one would connect them together in the middle of all these crazed fans.
Ducking around the corner, she stopped dead in her tracks. Kal was kissing a chicken!
Or... or a woman dressed in a very gaudy waitress outfit. It was the Trollop! She'd found the trollop!
*****
As Clark worked his way through the crowd, he was anxious to find Lois and face his medicine. Seeing her so broken-hearted before had woken him up. He'd known that Lois needed to know the truth about him, but had only thought that it was for his own good. Now after seeing her crying and upset about something, he realized that she may need to know the truth for her own peace of mind instead of his own.
A flash of color, bright yellow and fluffy, caught his attention in the back room, and he recognized one of the waitresses from the first time he came here as Clark. Waving at him with one hand, she was holding a black and white picture of himself dressed as Superman and seemed a bit troubled, not the bubbly person he remembered joking with.
"Hi, Superman," the waitress said shyly as he approached. "I was wondering if you had time to sign one more autograph."
"Of course. Who do I address this to?" He glanced at her nametag. "Karen?"
"Oh, no! It's not for me, but for my brother. He's been stationed overseas and his whole platoon looks up to you. You're more than a hero to them; you're their inspiration."
"I'd be honored. If you can tell me where he's stationed, perhaps I can drop in and deliver this in person, providing that I won't be putting them in any danger."
"Thanks, Superman. That would mean a lot to them." The waitress reached up on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. "You're not only a superhero, but a darn nice guy."
"You're welcome," Clark replied, slightly blushing. But then he caught Lois staring at them with a shocked expression on her face before she turned around and fled out of his sight.
"Excuse me, but I need to fly. If you can leave the info here, I'll be back to pick it up," Clark said urgently.
A big grin split her face. "I'll be working here most days. Now shoo!"
Clark nodded his head at her before heading back into the crowd to look for Lois. The crowd was pressuring him for more attention, and he realized that he'd never be able to get to her dressed as Superman so he flew over the crowd, out the door and up into the sky.
******
After spinning out of his suit, Clark caught up to Lois as she was retreating down the street and touched her arm to catch her attention.
"Clark?" she exclaimed, whirling around in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
"Lois, we need to talk. There's something very important you need to know."
Her head still reeling from finding Kal's trollop, she blurted without thinking. "First, let me say something. Clark, I know we have been connecting the past few days and this thing we have between us is very real, at least it's been to me. We had something the first couple of days we met, I felt it then and I feel it now, but could we have been a little hasty with us?" Lois screwed up her face in frustration. This was not coming out the way she wanted to at all.
She placed her hand on his chest, patting his shirt thoughtfully. "I really do love you, but how can we be sure?"
"Lois, I fell in love with you the first time I met you," Clark said quietly.
"But how Clark? You don't know me. Up until a couple weeks ago, we barely spoke two words together other than what was necessary."
He braced himself and smiled. This was the perfect opening he needed to tell her that he was her best friend.
"I do know you, Lois." Grasping her hand in his, he leaned forward and kissed her, his lips caressing hers tenderly. He didn't intend it go deeper, but it soon escalated into a sweet, passionate reminder of his emotions. He felt her resist at first, but her lips soon yielded to his.
The warm sensation of Clark's kiss almost erased the turmoil in her heart. It would be so easy to let him sweep her away to that place where she lost all conscious reasoning, but her thoughts turned to Kal and what she needed to do. She pushed Clark gently away.
"I'm sorry, Clark, but I still have some questions. How can you say you know me? That sounds like a line to me! Especially the one where you said you fell in love at first sight. We may have this amazing chemistry between us, but Clark, is that everything? What about being friends? And now you're handing out lines like candy."
"We are friends, Lois. And that wasn't a line. Please, there's something I need to tell you."
"Clark." She reached up and kissed his cheek, her hand soon following to smooth away the moisture from her lips. "I love you - that I know deep in my heart. I've loved you for a long time. You have to know that, but..."
"What? What is it?"
"I can't tell you." She couldn't let him know she was also in love with Superman. What if he laughed at her?
"Don't ask me to explain. I'm sorry if I'm confusing you. I never meant for that to happen."
Her resolve was firm now, it was going to break her heart to leave him confused, but that was a chance she was going to have to take. Maybe it was better if she pulled up her defenses against him, then it just might not hurt so much.
"I need some time," she whispered, as she closed her eyes and thought of Kal. Her best friend was worth the sacrifice of maybe missing out on a great guy like Clark. Even if it turned out that Kal wasn't interested in her, she needed to take the risk. It was possible that she would end up alone in spite of loving two men at the same time, but she knew that she loved Kal with all of her heart and she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she never told him.
Clark felt stunned. This is what he deserved for all his duplicity and procrastination. Lois was closing up on him again and he didn't know why. He didn't know how she could suddenly change her mind... but then again, this was Lois.
Determined all of a sudden, he decided enough was enough. Whatever was going through Lois' mind had to be put straight. And if she wasn't going to talk to Clark, then maybe she'd to talk to Kal.
Stunning her equally, he quickly answered, "Okay, if that's what you want." Touching her cheek briefly, he turned to go back into the restaurant. "My parents are waiting for me."
*****
Lois walked blindly through the streets, not knowing where her feet were taking her. She'd felt the sting of Clark's sudden acceptance of her decision that she needed more time, and yet she had no idea what she was going to say to Kal.
He was in love with the Trollop, and now it appeared that she was beginning to return his feelings. There was a very good chance that she, Lois, was going to embarrass herself by her declaration of love, but maybe it was for the best. Kal would turn her down and she would be free to get on with her relationship with Clark. There would be no regrets because she wouldn't have left things unsaid.
An undetermined amount of time later, she stopped, realizing that her thoughts had taken her to the one place where she could feel close to Kal and only Kal.
Their steps.
She sat down in her spot and closed her eyes, remembering that silly black hat he had worn and how shy he had been to open up to her. He had shown her the beginnings of true friendship that night, soothed her fears and had given her faith to face the next day.
A slight breeze cooled her skin and she didn't have to open her eyes to know that Kal had arrived.
"I think you're early," he whispered nervously. "I think we're supposed to meet tomorrow night."
"How'd you know I was here, and never mind, don't answer that." Lois opened her eyes but couldn't meet his gaze. Continuing in a whisper, she blurted, "I'd thought you'd be with her."
"Her? Who are you talking about? My mom?"
Sighing dejectedly, she clarified, "No, that woman, your girlfriend, the one I saw you kissing tonight."
Smiling gently, Clark took her hand, hoping to comfort her. "That was a fan thanking me for an autograph."
"Oh." His words then sunk in. "Oh!"
His hand felt deliciously warm in hers and she squeezed back even though she was slightly confused at Kal's actions.
"Your mom is wonderful. She helped me see some things clearer, but I'm still so confused."
"I know, Lois, and I'm sorry. I think we need to have our talk now." Clark stood up and pulled her to her feet. "Come on. Let's go back to your place."
"Okay. I have something to tell you too."
Clark scooped her up and flew as quickly as possible to Lois' apartment.
******
He stepped through the window, taking care not to get his cape snagged on the rough wood again. Lois thought it was odd that he didn't look her in the eyes and acknowledge her the way he always did. He usually had a genuine smile for her that, lately, warmed her down to her toes. Something seemed off. Well, she wasn't going to let his mood spoil what she needed to say.
Feeling a little shy, she jumped out of his arms and jabbed him in the ribs.
"Hey, stranger. Where ya been?" she said playfully, trying to poke him in the ribs. "I've missed you coming around."
"Sorry, I've been busy lately with the fundraiser. You've missed me?" he smiled at her, but Lois sensed that smiling was the last thing he felt like doing.
"Of course, I've missed you. Hug? You look like you could use one." Without waiting for his answer, she wrapped her arms around his waist. He felt warm and comfortable, like the feeling of coming home to a pair of warm fuzzy slippers and a toasty blanket, but she was also aware of his essence, and his physical being. She hugged him tightly and breathed in his scent, not wanting to let him go.
Clark was at a loss. Seeing her was more painful than he imagined it to be. After thinking they had reached a crossroads of sorts, he had been taken aback by being held at arms length by Lois as Clark. If she was about to change her mind about their new relationship status, he didn't know if he could take seeing her as only a friend any longer - not after being able to touch and kiss her as Clark. More importantly, after she heard what he had to tell her, she might never want to be around him again.
Resting his head on top of hers, he held her securely and closed his eyes tightly. This could be the last time he held her this way, and he wasn't going to let go until she pulled away. He had to tell her the whole truth this time. He had blown it as Clark, so he may as well ruin things with her as Kal. At least he wouldn't be living with this huge secret anymore.
To his surprise, he could feel her hands gliding across his back. He pulled slightly away and looked down at her. Her eyes seemed a little cloudy, and he was immediately concerned. Why was she upset?
"Hey, what's wrong?" he whispered gently. He pulled back and smoothed a tear from the corner of her eye.
Lois was startled. Why did that seem so familiar? But her question was lost as she sought his face.
<I just love you so much!> she thought. "I've practically stopped seeing this guy that I was dating," she said nonchalantly. "I told him I needed more time."
"Why, Lois? I thought you said you loved him," Clark mentally kicked himself for his line of questioning. He didn't want to spy on himself. If Lois couldn't tell him as Clark, he didn't have the right to know as Superman.
"Sorry. I shouldn't have asked that," he corrected himself immediately.
"It's okay. Come sit down. I want to explain something to you." She disengaged her arms from around his waist and grabbed his hand.
Clark was too mentally drained to argue with her as he let himself be tugged towards the sofa. Perhaps by the time she was finished, he would have worked up enough courage to tell her the truth.
She sat down next to him on the sofa and took his other hand. He squeezed them both gently; he'd better enjoy these last few minutes of tranquility before Mount Lois erupted.
"Kal, listen to me and don't interrupt. This is hard for me, but I need to say something to you, and you have to be quiet. First, there is an important question you need to answer."
"Okay," Clark replied. She was on the verge of major babble mode and even if he wanted to, he wouldn't be able to get a word in edgewise once that started.
"You are the best friend I've ever had in my life, and I don't imagine I will ever find anyone who is as loyal and trustworthy."
"You make me sound like a dog," Clark said glumly.
"No comments from the peanut gallery, please. This is hard enough," she said impatiently.
"Just don't ask me to bark," Clark quipped, trying to keep himself from looking so morose. "You had a question to ask me?"
"Sort of," Lois hedged. She was incredibly nervous, but had to ask.
"Did it ever work out with that woman you were interested in?" she asked quickly. She shut her eyes tightly in anticipation of his answer.
When it wasn't forthcoming, she opened her eyes and looked at him. The pain in his eyes was apparent; he was staring at a spot over her head.
"A plain yes or no will do, but by the look on your face, I guess it didn't; right?"
"No, it didn't work out," he stated simply.
<Good,> she thought. Next step. Phase two. Question number one.
"Have you ever thought of me in that way? Can you say that it has never crossed your mind that maybe we could have something?"
Kal looked at her incredulously. "What? What do you mean, Lois?"
"I mean this." She leaned toward him and stopped a few inches from his face. "This, Kal. Have you ever dreamed of me in *this* way?" Her arm wrapped around his neck and she waited.
Was this a trick? He didn't want to answer until he knew the reason why.
"Lois? I made a promise to you a long time ago. Are you testing me?"
"Kal, forget that silly promise. Now, do you ever want this?" She felt his breath on her face grow faster and she knew then that he wanted her as more than friends.
"Lois, that woman is you."
"Me?" Her voice trembled.
"Yeah, the woman I'm in love with is you. It's always been you."
Unable to resist any longer, Clark closed the inch between their lips and met hers with a kiss that was full of hope and a new promise. This was a dream come true for him; he was kissing her as Kal, her best friend.
*****
A few breathless moments later, they pulled apart and some puzzling thoughts began to prick at Clark's mind. "What about this man you're involved with? Where does he fit into the scheme of things?"
Her face grew somber and she swallowed noisily. "Kal, he's a wonderful man. I have to tell you that I still love him, and if it hadn't have been for finally realizing how much I love you, I'd probably end up spending the rest of my life with him. Does that change anything? I couldn't let being in love with my best friend get away from me. I've been blind, Kal. You mean more to me than someone who I don't really know. I mean I know this other guy, but not like I know you. Clark and I would be very happy together, but I always would have wondered about us, about what we could have shared together. I'm so glad that you feel the same way. I love you, Kal."
"Oh, Lois! I love you too." Clark pulled her to him and rested his head on top of hers, finding it hard to fathom that she really loved both of his identities.
Pulling back, he smiled at her wistfully. "Do you remember that promise I made to you that first night? To always stay your friend and not demand more of you?"
She smiled faintly back at him, "Until just recently, I had forgotten all about it."
"Lois, I've broken that promise."
"You have? That's great, because I have too." She reached up to touch his cheek; she was never going to get enough of touching him. "I think I like it much better this way."
"Wait," he broke in as he drew her hand away from his cheek. "You have to hear what I have to say, because afterwards, you might not feel the same way."
"Oh, Kal!" Lois cried in exasperation. "It's taken me too long to figure out how I feel about you. Anything you have to say to me is not
She was not making it easy on him. Maybe a different tactic was in order. He needed to render her helpless so he could speak and the only way to do that was to kiss her senseless and perhaps score a few brownie points this way also. He might need them. Well, he had to tell her, face the music and pay the consequences.
He cupped her face with one hand and soundly met her lips, drawing her against his body firmly with the other hand. When he heard her moan softly in her throat and he could no longer take kissing her without the danger of not being able to stop, he released her.
Her cry of protest was stifle by his dazed, but stern look. "Sorry, but you were babbling and I *have* to tell you something. Lois, I love you, too. Probably more than you'll ever know." He breathed deeply and searched her eyes. "I love you with a passion I've never dreamed was possible. When I'm with you, you are my world. When I'm not with you, you still are my world, and I don't know what I would do without you."
"Wow! For a space guy, you sure know how to sweet-talk a girl. But you're serious; aren't you? Now I'm worried. What's going on, Kal?" She took his hand and began stroking it gently.
"Remember that first night when we made that bet and you said that you would recognize me if you saw me in my real identity? Well, you lost the bet."
"I lost a bet! Is that what's got you all in knots?"
"Shhh! Please let me finish - or better yet; let me show you."
His eyes swept the room swiftly and found Lois' gaily colored scarf draped over the back of a chair. He snatched it from its resting place and placed it around his neck, tying it up around his neck.
"Kal! Don't tell me you're a cross-dresser!"
He sighed sternly at her, then bunched the scarf into a thin band running down his chest.
"I'm no good at charades. Please just tell me!"
He fished around in the back pocket of his suit and pulled out his glasses, then placed them on his face.
Lois' mouth dropped. It couldn't be. Was it really? Clark? She reached up and ruffled his hair. Oh, my gosh! Kal was Clark! Clark was Superman, and she was galactically stupid! All the pain of the past days flashed in front of her heart as she realized that she had agonized over the same guy. All those tears crying over Clark, then Superman, then Clark again could have been avoided if he had told her the truth about who he really was.
But there was also the joy in knowing that she didn't have to agonize over this anymore. The two men she loved were the same. She didn't know whether to kiss him or slug him. Clark was Superman! Kal was her colleague and partner! Clark was her best friend! The tears running down her face were a combination of joy and frustration, relief and resentment. How could he? How could he let her fall in love with both of his identities and not say anything about it? They were supposed to be best friends - or best ex-friends. Cold fury raced through her veins as anger suddenly took over.
Clark watched the tears stream down her face and felt his heart drop to vicinity of his spleen. He'd hurt her just as he had feared. Her expression on her face cut him to his very soul.
"It can't be," she stated blandly. "My best friend would never do this to me. What were you thinking? Were you laughing at me behind my back thinking what a moron I was for falling in love with both of you? Then you stood there and let me break up with you, Clark. Today must have been the pinnacle of your little game. Well, you won, Kal, or should I call you Clark, or do you have another identity that you're not telling me about? Were you disguised as Claude about a year or so back? That wouldn't surprise me."
"Lois... "
"Don't. Just let me speak. That's the least you can do while I try to sort all this out. I'm going for a walk, I can't think with you looking at me that way. You and your little hang-dog look is making me even madder than I am, if that's possible."
"Lois, please. I'll go," Clark pleaded.
"Don't you dare!" she blurted in frustration and then continued in a more collected manner. "Listen. I'm just a bit, okay, more than a bit blown over at this moment. I didn't mean that about you being disguised as Claude; it sort of popped out. I think we can work this out, because if we don't, um.... on second thought, I think you should leave before I say anything else I regret. When I'm ready to talk, I'll let you know. If I mean anything to you, you'll be around."
"I'll be around and you mean everything to me," Clark promised, feeling a bit more hopeful that she at least wanted to see him again and that she hadn't totally thrown him out on his cape.
Clark turned to leave, but Lois couldn't let him go without one last thing. She grabbed him around the neck and reeled him in for a searing kiss that left him staggering backwards when she released him. "I just need a little time to sort this out."
He simply nodded, apparently still dizzy from her kiss and stumbled out into the night.
Lois slammed the window shut and began to walk furiously around her apartment. She was mad at herself, mad at Kal, but mostly overwhelmed that the two men in her life were the same person and she hadn't figured it out. Right under her nose, he'd kept his two identities separated from her. But looking back, she hadn't given him any opportunity to tell her. She had made it perfectly clear that she hadn't needed anything but a friend at the time.
After the ball, she'd had railed on him about falling for some guy she'd just met, then the first exposure to the Kryptonite happened. It still puzzled her why he didn't tell her when they were captured in the warehouse, but knowing Clark, he was trying to spare her emotions at a time when they needed everything to figure out how to escape alive. Looking back to that night that she and Clark had spent together long ago, he was probably trying to tell her then but she had fallen asleep on him. And even before that, she'd kept throwing that promise of only friendship in Kal's face. No wonder he hadn't known what to do.
After that, she had only seen love one-sided, concentrating all her emotions on Clark Kent. She had broken up with Clark in order to salvage her career and had told Kal to keep his identity a secret. No wonder Clark had clammed up – he had been only giving her what she asked for.
Exhausted from the mental merry-go-round she was whirling around on, she sank down on her sofa and buried her head in her hands.
******
