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Merriwether
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Hope this isn't too dark. I hope you like the changes Virginia!

Joan

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Joan,

Interesting story! Gritty and a little dark, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Will there be a follow-up? grovel


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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smile1 for Lois for making major decisions regarding the kids without Clark. If he wasn't going to act like one of the family, he loses voting rights. It looks like Clark needed Lois to find his Utopia after all.

Love Jonathan speaking softly and hitting Clark upside the head with a club of reality. He needed it.

I'm a bit surprised that Lois chose Paris over Maine (maybe Clark doesn't realize the time of year and it's actually COLD in Maine at this point and time). I'd would think she'd rather go somewhere that felt more like home after being away for so long. Of course, Paris is a big city and Lois is from Metropolis, so maybe THAT would feel more like home. Or maybe it was something as simple as Lois really wanted French pastries. Yep, that must have been it. The chocolate is better in France than in Maine (sorry, Maine).

I love the added lines and the new Lois scene shows Clark's gotten the message that being a hero starts at home. The new stuff makes it more optimistic than the first draft; that Clark realizes that he's just as important as Superman (if not more so to his own family).

Great job.


VirginiaR.
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Thanks for reading Ken. Most likely this will stay as a one shot story.

Joan

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Originally posted by KenJ:
Joan,

Interesting story! Gritty and a little dark, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Will there be a follow-up? grovel

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Yea! smile1 for Lois for making major decisions regarding the kids without Clark. If he wasn't going to act like one of the family, he loses voting rights. It looks like Clark needed Lois to find his Utopia after all.
That's one feature I've always loved about the Lois & Clark TV show - that they acknowledge that Clark needs Lois just as much as she needs him. They're a team.

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Love Jonathan speaking softly and hitting Clark upside the head with a club of reality. He needed it.
I thought Jonathan was a good choice.

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I'm a bit surprised that Lois chose Paris over Maine (maybe Clark doesn't realize the time of year and it's actually COLD in Maine at this point and time). I'd would think she'd rather go somewhere that felt more like home after being away for so long. Of course, Paris is a big city and Lois is from Metropolis, so maybe THAT would feel more like home. Or maybe it was something as simple as Lois really wanted French pastries. Yep, that must have been it. The chocolate is better in France than in Maine (sorry, Maine).
Let's hear it for French pastries! I was thinking that Lois would crave being in a sophisticated city rather than yet visit yet another shore line. Paris might be overkill but Lois might be getting tired of the ocean view.

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I love the added lines and the new Lois scene shows Clark's gotten the message that being a hero starts at home. The new stuff makes it more optimistic than the first draft; that Clark realizes that he's just as important as Superman (if not more so to his own family).
Thanks! I'm glad that message came across. In an earlier draft, a non-L&C friend was trying to convince me to leave Clark Kent 'dead' and have him only be Superman. It could work but it wouldn't be the Lois & Clark that we love. And it wouldn't have been the story I wanted to tell.

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Great job.
Thanks for reading!

Joan

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A very dark story. It's sad to see Clark afflicted with hopelessness; Superman has always been a symbol of hope, a symbol that we can do better. It makes sense that he is like this if he hasn't let Lois recharge him - as you said, he needs her.

I'm glad you ended the story on a note of hope.

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Originally posted by IolantheAlias:
I'm glad you ended the story on a note of hope.
I liked the idea that even if circumstances were truly awful, that there was still hope and good could prevail. I was looking for a quote to express the idea that sometimes bad times stimulate people to try new ways to solve problems that under normal circumstances, they wouldn't have done. No luck though.

Thanks for reading!

Joan

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This was dark, but there is hope.

Clark needs Lois through good times and bad. Could there be any better end of the story?


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Originally posted by Morgana:
This was dark, but there is hope.

Clark needs Lois through good times and bad. Could there be any better end of the story?
I always loved that Superman needed Lois, despite his superpowers. That his powers alone were not sufficient.

Thanks for reading Morgana!!

Joan

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I'm catching up on some reading, and I just wanted to let you know that I really liked this story. It is interesting to wonder how Superman would operate in the world today. Your story brings up an interesting point - in what case is Superman's help actually detrimental to people? I certainly don't mean intentionally, but when people expect someone else to take care of them, rather than being empowered to take care of themselves and help others, then they become lazy and selfish. It's a question of "is too much good actually bad?"

Thanks for this story! I love a story that makes you think!

Amber smile


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