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#67235 11/05/09 02:07 AM
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Feedback goes here.

Thanks.

Corrina.

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in some ways, this is the worst cliff-hanger....

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It's funny, but I'm actually very pleased with this cliffhanger. Not that I don't want to keep reading -- I'd tunnel through the intertubes and start digging through your hard drive if I could laugh -- but for a while now, I've been hoping, hoping, hoping that Kal would go talk to Za. It's the proper thing, the respectful thing, for him to do, plus I really wanted to get her take on all of this. (And if he's brave enough to ask her about whether the samples are being delivered properly, all the better.)

I think this was a fabulous chapter. We finally got the answers to a lot of our questions about what marriage will mean for both Lois and Kal, plus how it will affect their future children. And I think it was a smart plotting move to have Lois talk to Riz. Not only could Riz give us verification of what Kal had explained, but she was also able to give us insight on Zara and how her decision to ignore her husband is perceived by the people. Nicely done!

Incidentally, I also think Kal's advice that Lois keep her abilities secret is sound. I think Lois's suspicions regarding Nor will help protect her somewhat and, of course, her powers will help her even more. But there is no doubt in my mind that Nor will be very unhappy with this new development, and that his unhappiness will cause him to move against Lois in some way. And he's going to be in for a big surprise when he tries. thumbsup

More, pretty please? Seeing a new chapter of this story just makes my whole day. smile

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Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
That is all I have to say clap


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Well done, Corrina!

You're doing a terrific job of slowly removing the communication barriers between Lois and Kal. He's getting better at reading her emotions and is even able to make jokes himself. And when he doesn't understand every detail, he get the gist and he knows when not to bother interrupting the flow of the conversation.

I love his line about needing to get her happiness back.

Riz has a good point about Za. She's had ten years to show interest in her husband. So we won't feel too sorry for her. I am proud of Kal for going to talk to her. He wants to do right by her, and that's completely in line with his character. I'm curious to see what Za will say.

thumbsup thumbsup


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I wonder, since Za-Ra has shown no interest in Kal-El for ten years, if she's the one who's sabotaging the "samples" she gets every month? Even other NK women have decided that she's just not that into the Supreme Ruler at all, so why would she even want to have his kid?

Yay for the drilling! Finding a supply of fresh water will go far in derailing Nor's plans. I only hope that he doesn't go off the deep end when he hears about it.

Of course, if he does, maybe that would prompt Lois to come to Kal's rescue in a very direct and visible way. She's already awakened his heart (wonderful title!) and saving him from Nor's assassination attempt would certainly go far in uniting the two factions and placing Lois in a favorable light. And we'd get to find out just what other powers she has, too!

Next post is when?


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Ok, I really am struggling to contain my grin at that chapter, it really was wonderful (no surprise there!)

It was nice and long and, as Kathy said, it explained so much about how their marriage can work etc. L&K discussed a lot of what I've been dying for them too discuss for ages.

It is so clever how you have found a way around almost every obstacle with the bigamy/children with Za thing, meaning that Kal and Lois will to all intents and purposes be able to have a 'normal' marriage, and it all fits so well into the context of the story and what we know of New Krypton.

I am also pleaed Kal is going to see Za. I'm not at all surprised he felt he should as he does have a strong sense of morality and does not wish bad on Za. I am wondering if she does have feelings for Ching, as has been speculated, and whether Kal will find out about this. Has it been mentioned whether a noble woman can have a second marriage? It seems a very sexist society so I imagine not, but if Za could marry Ching it would be happy ever after for all!

I get the impression Ching is meant to be good, or at least good in comparison to Nor. Perhaps he has complied in the sample-sabotage because of his feelings for Za!

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He’d forgotten she could read his face. “Because there are things I don’t think you will like.”
I love the detail in your writing, how you continue to make reference to the little Kryptonian/human differences.

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Lois capped her hands over his. “It’s OK, Kal,” she said. “I don’t expect you to do anything that would hurt Za.”
Lois can respect Kal for not wanting to make Za an outcast and ruin her merely for his own gains. She would expect nothing less from him and it is part if the reason she loves him. Kal is not used to such unselfishness from others.

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Lois nodded. “I don’t *like* it,” she said. “And I can’t imagine another situation where I would be willing to accept it ... but in this one, I am.”
This is the point about the second marriage thing. It is a unique circumstance, or unique to anything Lois has ever come across, so she has to view the situation with different standards. She and Kal love each other and no-one it seems can be hurt by their marriage, if anything there are likely to be benefits for the planet as a whole.

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Her eyes sparkled. “What if I decided I wanted my *own* household?” she said. “Instead of moving in with you?”

This time, Kal was sure she wasn’t serious. “That would be fine,” he said blithely.

“It would?”

“Sure.” Kal grinned. “So long as I could move in with you.”
Awwww! This whole part made me melt. I love how Kal is playing with her here. Lovely mutual banter.

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“But if I, as your wife, were to have a child, he or she could not be accepted as your child unless we went the sample route.” Lois stared at him, face set. “Which we are *not* going to do.”

“No,” Kal breathed. “No, we are not.”
rotflol Nooo way!! I imagine this as being similar to when HG Wells suggested abistinence to L&C. L&K haven't waited quite as long, but the patience is wavering all the same. Hence the nearly next-day marriage!

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The words ‘our child’ sent a thrill through him, but it was quickly extinguished. “Lois,” Kal said sadly. “I don’t think that will happen. I don’t think I will ever father a child.”

“Because you have bad seed?” Lois asked.

He could feel the focus of her displeasure as it centred on him. “Yes.”
I'd almost forgotten he'd been led to believe that. Poor Kal, there is no end to the deceit and he is so dejected, not daring to believe it may be sabotage instead.

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“Kal, for Za to get pregnant, your seed has to actually get inside her.”

He did know that. “Yes.”
lol

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Her intensity was disconcerting, but it occurred to Kal that it may not be directed at him. “Because it is not only Nor,” Kal said. “Ching oversees the delivery to Za as well.”
This is a very bizaare image. The idea of Kal's 'seed' being delivered to Za by the two noblemen!

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Kal was still trying to process her first sentence. “You think it’s possible we could have a child?” he said in wonder.

Lois smiled. “I’d be willing to bet we have more chance than you and Za ever had.”

“You think so?”

“Yes,” she insisted. “At least for us, the *sample* will get to where it’s supposed to be.”
laugh I love the blend between lightness and seriousness in this whole conversation.

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“I can’t guarantee our *seed* will be compatible,” Lois said. “But our bodies will be.”

“How do you know?” A sudden possibility snagged his breath in his throat. “Have you looked?”
laugh

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Kal grinned. “If *I* could see through clothes, I would really want to look through yours.”

Lois answered his smile. “Would you do it?”

“I hope not.” He grinned again. “But the temptation would be considerable.”
LOL! Kal, like Clark, is so innately good and respectful that he probably wouldn't look if he could. I love how you write Kal's speach BTW, in that he always speaks very 'properly' as would be expected from somebody essentially using a translation. Just as people who speak English as a second language often speak it better than the actual English-speakers. That combined with the fact that he is very serious-natured and a noble of course. I think of it as being like Superman speaks in the show.

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“If you haven’t looked,” he asked. “How do you know we will be physically compatible?”

“I’ve seen you in the black suit.”

The black suit. “Oh.”
wink There it is!! No-one is looking at his face!

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He did. But knowing it didn’t translate easily to saying it. “Initially ... many, many years ago ... it was to show the people the physical strength of their leader to give them comfort and security in his protection.”

“So it is *meant* to be revealing?”
Love the explanation, it helps if the Supreme Ruler looks like Kal though! It's ok for men in their prime.

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“Really?” Lois said. “I thought it was because you knew that one day a woman would drop in from a faraway planet – a woman who is particularly partial to a superbly defined chest and tautly muscular shoulders.”

Kal coughed in a clumsy attempt to cover his embarrassment. “You ... ah ... like my chest?”
Hee hee - love it, love it all!!

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He didn’t understand much beyond her approval, but he concluded now was not the time for full understanding. He tried to clear the constriction from his throat. “Maybe we should work on the details of our marriage ... so we can ... ah ... get to ... that ... as quickly as possible,” he suggested.
wink This is funny, it's a shotgun wedding so they can get started conceiving a child, rather than because one has already been conceived!

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“With Za, I wanted an heir,” Kal said. “I wanted to honour my forefathers with a new generation. I wanted to fortify the future of my planet.” He took her hand. “And with you, Lois, it is all that ... but it is so much more. To have a child who is the mixing of you and me ... a child that is the result of our love ... a child that we can love together. *That* would be more than ... so much more than ... anything I have ever hoped for.”
This was just lovely!!

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“After we are married, will you continue to give Za the sample every month?”

Kal shifted uncomfortably under her direct gaze. “You don’t want me to, do you?” he guessed.
I like how they got around to discussing everything, even the slightly awkward points and I like even more the answers you found for them.

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“*We* would not allow that,” Kal said. “We would be a family. You, me and our child. Our child could have all the things I didn’t have – the love of a mother and the love of a father ... guidance and training and stability and knowing how to laugh and to have tears and to love.”
Aww again!!! What a lovely picture!

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“That’s going to be an awful lot of pressure on us to conceive,” Lois said disconsolately.
They are going to have to be busy. laugh It's a lot of pressure on Lois though, still getting used to a new planet etc to be trying to get pregnant straight away. She's still only been there for a few weeks! I know she feels completely comfortable and ready with Kal, but it's still a big deal. She's running out of patience where the 'physical contact' is concerned though!

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He grinned with her, relieved. “*Not* officially, you will get many things – the whole of my heart, my everlasting love, my profound gratitude, everything I am.”

Lois cradled his face in her hands and looked deep into his eyes. “Then that will be enough,” she told Kal. “I will share you officially, but unofficially, you will be all mine.”

“Yours,” he agreed. “Only yours.”
Lovely vow-like words again.

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Lois was about a second away from losing herself in the lure of Kal’s kiss when she remembered the aquifer. She pulled away rather abruptly. “Can you show me a map of New Krypton?” she asked.
Nothing like thoughts of aquifers to kill the moment!! I guess it is pretty important though, especially now they are planning a future and children toegether to secure the future of the planet.

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“And you know I am not disconcerted that you can see through things ... but ... maybe it would be best if others don’t know.”
I think this makes a lot of sense, especially at the moment with Nor etc. Lois' powers are a better advantage when they're not known about. Wonder how Kal will explain his hunch about the water though. I guess as Supreme Ruler he doesn't have to.

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He kissed her quickly. “I need to order the two working drills be moved,” he said. “Then I want to do some of the things from my schedule for the days following our marriage.” He flashed her a wide, bursting-with-anticipation grin and left the room.
Yes, they definitely need some days of not leaving his room!! Unless there's a New Krypton equivalent of Hawaii!!

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“So she deserves to lose him?” Lois said, impossibly conflicted by the weird feeling of indignation on behalf of her fiancé’s wife.”
Sounds funny, fiancee's wife!! Typical Lois to feel indignation on her behalf though!

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“It isn’t that she deserves to lose him,” Riz said. “But that I doubt she will care what he does. She has never shown any inclination to be close to him.”

“Is she blind?” Lois asked.
LOL!!! Clearly she must be! I still think she must love Ching.

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“The Rule does not apply to a wife.”

“It doesn’t?”

“She usually has no contact with her husband, so there is nothing to tell.”
Not this wife!! She will have plenty worth telling!!

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Riz turned and gathered a pile of about fifteen books from a shelf. She offered them to Lois.

“What are all these?” Lois asked.

“I made copies of your books,” Riz explained. “I did the writing in both Kryptonian languages and as soon as I had checked if it were all right with you, I planned to get Tek to take them to Ard to draw the pictures.”
Riz really does think like Lois, she has similar vision of how the planet could be a better place, a vision no doubt also shared by Tek.

That chapter was such a treat, as always, and a fantastic antidote to a stressful day at the office.

Great to have you back Corrina, though you did an amazing job while you were away.

Em smile


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You sure resolved a lot of issues in here, Corrina goofy

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Kal nodded. “That is one reason why I do the physical exercise.”
Yeah, talk about pressure. /goes distracting muse before she sees gauntlet on board/ :p

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Then, Riz placed the beverage in front of them and sat down. “There are rumours that you and the Supreme Ruler are becoming increasingly closer.”
Now now now, isn't that a taboo topic?

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“Tek will officiate, so I will find out from him.”
Oh boy, Riz sure is able to take 1 and 9 and figure out that there's a whole lot of dot's in between laugh

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“She has no course to be offended.”
And that's the Kryptonian coming through.

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“Is she blind?” Lois asked.

“No, she is not,” Riz answered seriously.
The female population sure has learned to ignore the ancient rites, hmm...?

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Riz swung her leg from under the table and lifted her gown a few inches. Lois saw she wore a copper coloured band around her ankle. “This signifies I am married.”

“Does Kal wear one of those? Does Tek?”

“Tek does. The Nobles do not.”
I think that's about to change.

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“Oops,” Lois said with a half-formed smile. “I forgot the rule about not being allowed to mention the Supreme Ruler.”
Now she's thinking about it?

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“Thank you,” Lois said. Then she remembered the other purpose of her visit. “I would like to make copies of the books so other children can have them,” she said. “Could I please have the early books back for a day?”

Riz turned and gathered a pile of about fifteen books from a shelf. She offered them to Lois.
I so did not expect that eek

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“I made copies of your books,” Riz explained. “I did the writing in both Kryptonian languages and as soon as I had checked if it were all right with you, I planned to get Tek to take them to Ard to draw the pictures.”
That's clever. And do I interpret this correctly that Riz wrote the text in both languages on each page? So that the kids can see both languages at the same time. And pick up on the other one? Maybe even read the books together in clandestine meetings between North and South kids?

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Kal stared at the closed door.
And another surprise hyper Maybe one half of 24 tomorrow and the other one (as part 25) a day later? grovel

Michael


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I loved this part! The best thing to forget a busy day at work.

I am a bit worried about Nor. What will he do when he hears about the wedding...

It is a good thing Kal suggested to keep Lois abilities secret. If Nor tries to harm Kal she will be able to protect him.


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So when is Nor going to abduct and torture Lois?

Tank (who likes to get right to the point of a story)

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I continue to love the conversations between Lois and Kal. This Za and Kal one should be interesting, though. And how will Lois react that he went to see her? smile

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Sarah Worse than the 'cliff' cliff-hanger?!? smile

Thanks.

Kathy

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And I think it was a smart plotting move to have Lois talk to Riz. Not only could Riz give us verification of what Kal had explained, but she was also able to give us insight on Zara and how her decision to ignore her husband is perceived by the people.
This wasn't the primary reason (plot-wise) why Lois had this conversation with Riz, but having it work on other levels is always encouraging. smile1

Thanks for all your FDK, Kathy.

Laura Thanks! laugh

Happy Girl Thanks. I really appreciate your comment about the gradual improvement in their ability to communicate. Anything gradual is hard to write - it has to keep moving forward overall, but any unexplained big leaps destroy the credibility of the story.

Terry Interesting thoughts about Za. The next part opens with the conversation between her and Kal, so she finally moves out from the shadows, so to speak.

Emma

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It is so clever how you have found a way around almost every obstacle
rotflol

This is so funny for me because I'm ... well because of what I'm currently writing. laugh

The bit about Lois having her own household was put in at the very, very last moment - because I felt the conversation jumped a bit and I needed a smoother bridge. I struggled to get the dialogue right and I was eager to post the part and very nearly deleted those few lines.

Glad you liked them - it was worth taking the time to work on them.

Thanks, Em.

Michael

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And do I interpret this correctly that Riz wrote the text in both languages on each page? So that the kids can see both languages at the same time. And pick up on the other one? Maybe even read the books together in clandestine meetings between North and South kids?
Yes that's what I meant.

Riz and Lois had the same idea - but Riz went further by providing the same books for all Kryptonian kids.

Michael, in your FDK, you make a comment that no one else really touches on. I'm so glad you did, because it means I'm not the only one who thinks that particular way.

Kathryn Thanks for the comments, Kathryn. Close ... so close.

Tank Sorry to disappoint, Tank, but this is a gentle, innocent love story. smile

Nor is little more than a prop!!

And with Lois's powers, I'm not sure what you suggest is even possible!!

Thanks for leaving FDK.


Re - progress.

I really want to increase my buffer, so I held off posting 23 until I got 25 and 26 to Iolanthe.

27 and 28 are written and a lot of scenes for 29 and 30 were written weeks ago, so hopefully the gaps between posts will be shorter from now on. (3 days, maybe, no promises though.)

Thanks everyone for your wonderful FDK - you make my day.

Corrina.

EDIT - Amy Thanks for reading and leaving FDK, Amy. smile

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I'm just wondering: Is Lois' invulnerability complete now, or is it still developing? If so, will the Translator simply pop out of her head at some point as it is rejected?

I can see her suddenly needing to learn both North and South Kryptonian (but maybe the superpowers include a gift for languages, as it seems to for Clark on L&C).

This is a fascinating story, very well told. Please keep it up.

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Wonderful part!

I'm expecting Nor to do something. I think Lois's invulnerability will come in handy.

I'm glad that Kal has finally gone to see Za. That should be a very revealing conversation.

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Darn RL.... razz

Came home late yesterday, came home late the day before yesterday, got up early yesterday, got up early today, will get off work early today but will have a million things to fix when I get home... razz

Delightful part, though! sloppy

You wrote about many both delicate and weighty matters so beautifully. Loved so many things, but found it particularly interesting to learn about Za's lack of interest in Kal. Dare we hope that she is in love with Ching, and that there will be a way for her to divorce Kal and marry Ching?

I love how you make both Lois and Kal so sweet in your fic, more so than they often are in many stories, and yet they are so believably "Lois and Clark".

Thank you for giving us the gift of this Lois and Kal, Corinna! sloppy

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Is it possible to curse with joy? That's how exciting the cliff-hanger was for me. goofy

Meanwhile, something else caught my attention, regarding Lois' superpowers:

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“Please don’t think I am ashamed of you,” Kal said. “I could never be that. But I would hate it if people thought of you as an oddity.”
You know, I don't think I've ever batted an eye at Superman being the odd man out, or someone to be wary of. But with Lois being the alien here, I feel people would totally freak out at her new abilities. And I'm not sure what the difference is yet.../shrug Maybe it's that Clark grew up on Earth, so underneath all that uncomfortable Spandex, we all know he's just one of the guys...But even so I totally get why people would freak out if someone on their planet just showed up with super powers, and that never really dawned on me before with Superman.

Great part,
JD


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Snave wrote:
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I'm just wondering: Is Lois' invulnerability complete now, or is it still developing? If so, will the Translator simply pop out of her head at some point as it is rejected?
Ooo, interesting question. And an amusing, if somewhat gross, image, LOL.

Perhaps it would work the other way? Since her invulnerability developed after the translator was inserted and adapted to her, maybe Lois's body would simply accept it as part of her and her powers would protect against anyone/anything trying to remove it.

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Snave

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Is Lois' invulnerability complete now, or is it still developing? If so, will the Translator simply pop out of her head at some point as it is rejected?
Until Lois decides to test her new abilities, I doubt she would know the full range of her powers. We know of Superman's powers, but it isn't likely that Lois will wake up one morning and think 'Should I see if I can freeze anything with my breath?'

The translator popping out of her head is not something I had even considered. smile

Thanks for your FDK!

Bob Thanks. I think Kal will learn a lot from his chat with Za (see part 24).

Ann Thanks for still reading and leaving FDK despite the busyness of your life.

I'm so glad that, despite all the differences, this still reads like a Lois and Clark story.

JD Thanks - glad you're enjoying it.

Kathy Good point, Kathy. She doesn't fully realise it yet, but no one is going to take anything from Lois that she wants to keep.

Thanks,

Corrina.


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