Wow. That was unexpected. I was captivated by the first part when Lois tracked Clark down. Very good rendition of 1st season Lois there.
However, I was still under the impression that she was Lena until she started asking her questions. Confusion set in...
Now that he thought about it for a minute, she did seem familiar, but he couldn't immediately place her.
These lines made it apparent that Lois wasn't Lena, but I wondered if maybe Lena was an alter-ego of Lois' when her memory had gone awry (similar to Wanda Detroit). Could her appearance and characteristics be so different that Clark wouldn't recognize her?
To other readers, maybe it was obvious that they were two different people. Clark will probably never forget what Lena/Monique looked like.
Interesting story. You're integrating the flashbacks and real-time very well. I get a little frustrated by it (not because of your writing, but because I want to know what happens next
) I can't wait for the next part.
Brenda