The sound of an aluminum can hitting the sidewalk made Clark realize that they weren’t alone.
Huh, Lois?
At the far end of the park, some twenty feet away, some kid was digging through the garbage searching for soda cans.
Or not.
“Actually, it was his idea,” Linda said.
He blinked his eyes. Either it was too early in the morning for even his brain to comprehend this or Linda King was insane.
He has trouble to comprehend that Lex is just plain bonkers?
“Who knows? I think he was curious what her reaction would be.”
You mean, like Amy on The Big Bang Theory does with her monkeys?
AMY:
I should have thought of using a human. They usually *don’t* fling feces at you when they’re displeased.
SHELDON: I know what you must be thinking. But if I waited until I found someone my intellectual equal, I’d still be single.
O-kay. Clark could kind-of see that. Logically, he couldn’t make sense of torturing the woman he was going to marry,
And yet, he froze, lied, and dumped her. Some of those things, repeatedly.
CLARK: Really? You *have* to mention those?
but they were discussing Lex Luthor… reason need not apply.
To be fair, I think sociopaths can be very easily understood. You just have to think what your cat would do, then take away the compassion.
“I mean,” Linda went on when Clark still didn’t speak. “I’m betting Luthor wanted Lois vulnerable and to come to him in her hour of need.” She rolled her eyes.
Sounds reasonable?
“Sounds like the kind of patronizing stuff guys pull all the time on their girlfriends, just to feel needed... You know, the big hero.”
Like Clark always trying to “rescue” Lois from dangerous situations?
But, according to various TV shows, what 90% of the male population would do.
Something clicked in Clark’s brain, but before he could speak, a can flew through the air and clocked Linda in the back of the head, causing Clark to jump to his feet.
Huh, Lois? But… /backtracks/ Oh…Duh!
Jimmy had always said that Lois was a master of disguises but he’d never thought she could pull it over on him.
So the Superman reveal won’t be that hard on her?
You’re still engaged to the third richest man in the world. We’re even.” Linda stood up to leave, but Lois blocked her path. “Take it up with him, Lois.”
She does hear herself, right?
“St. John,” Clark finished with a nod. He turned to Linda. “Was it Luthor who you spoke to over the phone?”
Linda shifted her eyes back and forth between them standing in front of her as if dawn was slowly arriving to her brain. “No… but…”
So, perfect deniability?
“Linda’s cocky,” Clark said, pointing at the corner of a photo sticking out from inside the hotel’s Bible.
Is Lois wearing a slutty nun’s costume in it?
He wondered how often and for how long he would have to remind himself of this.
You’ll excuse me if I won’t wait for this to play out…
“He won’t use them. Lex would kill him,” Lois replied.
Clark raised a surprised eyebrow at this accurate appraisal of the situation.
“Metaphorically,” she clarified.
Yes.
LEX: She means an overdose of Metaamphetamines. About an amphora full of the stuff.
before pressing all his love on to her lips in a kiss that would lift them both off the floor with pleasure.
Wouldn’t that reveal his little secret?
LOIS: Ooooh! Is that Superman who is happy to see me?
all his love on to her lips
“onto” ?
Apparently, Linda had been able to free herself and escape from Lois’s apartment before Lois had made it home from the hotel.
They just stuck her in Lois’s apartment? Isn’t that dangerous?
Clark hoped that meant that Linda was safe from any retaliation from Luthor once he found out about her involvement in the blackmail scheme.
Clark now too believes Lex is innocent?
While Nigel might need protection, Superman wasn’t anyone’s bodyguard.
NIGEL:
I’m terribly sorry, sir. I didn’t realize that the gun was loaded. Or that there would be more than one bullet in there. But let me thank you for that Cayman Islands Bank account. I will take good care of your investments there for you.
Not only were photos of a scantily clad Lois seared onto his memory cells to torture him for eternity
Next to his home movie of a scantily clad harem’s girl doing the dance of the even veils?
Rescuing Lois from Luthor might not make Clark’s life any better, but he hadn’t gone into the hero business to improve his own life.
As if we couldn’t tell by the lack of scantily clad groupies transitioning through his private office in the Superman Foundation.
“Hi,” Lois’s voice sounded from Clark’s open doorway. “I had the devil of a time finding parking in your neighborhood, Clark.”
“I figured if we’re going to bring Luthor down,” Lois said, leaning into Clark’s chest and surrounding his waist to draw him closer before letting go, and moving towards their former boss. “— we’d need the Chief to help us continue where you left off.”
TEMPUS:
“No offense, Lois, but what makes you think that I’m investigating your fiancé?” Clark closed his file, pushing it to the center of the table and away from them. He then took her arm and guided her towards his sofa.
“Former fiancé. I broke the news to Lex this morning after I phoned you about Linda. Then he told me that Chip would return as editor come Monday.”
So, she’s not putting out so he’s putting her out of her new office? Can’t she sue for sexual harassment?
Clark grabbed her hand to stop her. “No. No. I mean, how did you…? Why did you…?” There were too many questions buzzing in his mind to choose the correct first one.
“Ribbit”?
She looked down at his hand holding hers. Before he could let go, she squeezed it, knocking him breathless. “You wouldn’t lie to me, Clark.”
No, that can’t be it.
“Nor was Lex innocent when he killed Max Menken in order to ‘save’ me.
LEX: 12 peers would say otherwise. If the state of New Troy could find 12 more 3rd richest white men in the world.
However, the patent for anything my father created would then belong to LexLabs, so they parted ways. Two weeks later, the medical board revoked my father’s license to practice medicine.”
Huh, I guess the bureaucracy is slower than human resources?
“Right! Lex is more slippery than… a… an eel.”
LEX: That’s slander. I can be as slippery as human intestines spilling out of a body that fell from a sky scraper. Here, let me proof it to you!
“Ooops,” he mouthed. Clark honestly thought that she had told Perry what had happened.
LOIS: He might be daft, but I still lo-like him like a little brother.
“Someone tried to blackmail me with some risqué pictures…”
“Of you and Kent?” Perry asked.
GOODE: Not for another two and a half years or so…
Their old boss shot Clark a questioning expression on Lois’s sanity. Clark decided to act as if he didn’t understand.
Maybe she’s run out of chocolates back home?
“Lois, do you want the good news or the bad news first?” Jimmy said.
“Bad news?” she echoed.
“Someone leaked a semi-naked photo of you onto the Internet,” Jack said.
Also, umm…summer of 1994? I guess the Internet really was kickstarted by online porn.
“Don’t worry. You were covering…” He waved his hands around his torso. “— everything.”
“Who knew you were once hot, Ms. Lane?” Jack said before stepping out of range.
Really? Bad Jack. Bad!
“The good news,” Jimmy continued. “—is that on a normal private dial-up connection it takes fifteen minutes to a half an hour to download.”
One wonders how they know that so precisely.
“Good news? Then why were you having such a hissy fit while it loaded?” Jack asked.
Jimmy scowled at him to shut up. “The bad news is that LNN picked up on the story and has been covering it and the picture non-stop for the last hour.”
Now look at that. This *must* be really important news.
ANCHOR: And in other news, Lex Luthor has decided that he unfortunately had to call off his engagement to Ms. Lois Lane after it became public that she was doing tricks and porn during her college years. While Mr. Luthor isn’t personally blaming Ms. Lane for her life choices, he may be quoted to having a responsibility to uphold the values and morals of this great city and society in general. He and Ms. Lane parted amicably and he hopes that she will get the counsel needed in her difficult time while she is attending the Carlin Center for Drug Rehabilitation.
Lois screamed at so loudly that only Superman and dogs could hear her. When she again found her voice, and Clark his hearing, she told Jimmy to continue.
Also, extra ‘at’ in there.
“ – and that you two had a disagreement about the freedom of the press and personal privacy and that you decided to part ways.”
Clark rubbed her arm. “How about some good news?”
“Oh, right, CK,” Jimmy said, opening up his laptop on Clark’s coffee table. “It’s up and running.”
They brought the photo with them to show to Clark?
“Did I mention that I left a listening device in Lex’s office while I was there?”
And now for the conclusion…
Michael