Lois & Clark Forums Forums General Discussion Fun with Polls Are You Out or In?

This is based on a question which Yvonne posted to the fanfic email list a few years ago. Someone mentioned being a closet FoLC on IRC and I thought it would make a good poll.

So... how closeted are you?


Wendy

I voted for coming 'out of the closet' bit by bit.

I have a few Superman trivia in my study and a few 'Lois and Clark' paperbacks and comic books floating around, so friends and family know. But I don't talk about it, only if they ask. Problem is, no one I know watches the show.

Maybe some day I'll be brave enough to introduce my closest friends to fanfic and let them read some of mine. I've been part of this Fandom for so long now I don't feel too awkward about it anymore.

Ursie

I'm kind of inbetween a couple of the options.

I have no problem telling people that I 'play' on the Lois and Clark websites, or that I write Lois and Clark fan fiction, it's just that most of them either don't really understand, or could care less, or both.

A few people have written down the archive address, but I'm sure they haven't bothered to go there and read anything of mine.

A friend of mine who is a professional comic book writer occasionally will ask me if I've written anything lately, and we will discuss what I've recently written, but I'm sure he's never sampled the online stuff.

Tank (who doesn't care if those who aren't really into Lois and Clark ever read his stuff because they won't 'get' the stories anyway)

I am kind of in between on both. My parents used to know i was a folc and that i wrote fanfic. Now they think I have long since stopped. The number of lies I had to tell them to go to the beach this summer with my folc friends was absolutely insane.

Since I don't have a spouse or even a boyfriend, they don't know, but the one person that knows about it all is my best friend and roommate rachel. This was not on purpose/ She caught me plotting stories in class once and begged to read it until she found teh stories on my computer and read them. Then once I was IMing Annie and she IMed me and i ended up typing my response to Annie into Rachel's IM window -- and it was feedback to a story part she had imed me. Let me tell you, that was embarrassing. So rachel knows, and she makes fun of me a lot, but she hasn't told anyone else in a few years. She did use it as my "sister question" for the pledges in our sorority, but that's a whole other story. I seriously got her back with the question I asked about her.

This long story, written so to aviod studying for my final tomorrow, does have a point. I am mostly closeted, just about completely, but one person knows and teases me relentlessly.

Sorry for the typos and lack of capitolization. Typing 1-handed stinks

I'm totally in the closet. :p I bet one of my friends has seen me surfing sites like this, but other than that...my family thinks everyone who does chat rooms and message boards are all internet stalkers waiting to kidnap us all. So believe me, they aren't finding out anytime soon. They've almost caught me a few times reading fanfic and posting and such online...I think my mom thought I was looking at porno or something for a while back when I lived at home on a regular basis...I would always exit out of my browser whenever I heard her coming in my direction. It sort of amused me. So yeah, that's my paranoid family in a nutshell...ps, they're still waiting for people to scale the balcony to break into the dorms at school and steal my guitar. (And yes it's possible, I regularly lock myself out and have to do it. ) :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

JD

I'm totally in - both as a folc in general and as a writer. Even my roommate has no clue. When Kathy came to stay with us this summer, I told him she was an old family friend.

All of my friends know that I write, because I also write original fiction, so if I talk about writing, they just assume it's one of those projects. I did show one of my stories to my best friend once. I did it only because she was stuck on a writing project of her own and the story I sent her dealt with exactly the problem she was struggling with. I agonized for days about whether to show it to her, and nearly hyperventilated after I hit send. I didn't tell her anything about folcdom though. I just told her it was writing exerisize. She really liked the story and it helped her, but she thought the fact that I was writing about Superman was pretty weird, and we basically never mentioned it again.

I'm not entirely certain why I'm so tight-lipped about it. I just don't want to have to explain myself, I guess. It's something that I enjoy, and I don't want to be made to feel guilty about it. Also I like having someting that is just mine. Because almost all of my close friends also worked at the newspaper with me when I worked there, I was with them basically 18 hours a day, 7 days a week. Folcdom was a great escape.
Since I no longer work at the paper, I don't have that issue anymore, but the feeling of escape is still nice.

I keep telling myself I'm going to tell more people, but somehow it never seems to come up. <G>

Annie

Oh, I'm hanging out all over I've mentioned FoLCdom and fanfic to all sorts of people... bosses, church friends, my son's school psychologist... (and the psychologist still thinks I'm a good mom! :p ) The level of detail varies, depending on the conversation. I'm most guarded around my husband's family, but they still know some things. But I'm pretty pleased with myself to have friends and readers all around the world, so it tends to come up.

PJ

Out and proud! I don't think it is possible to know me and not know I'm a FoLC. It's not quite as obvious now as when the show was airing, but definitely people know. I'll see someone I hang out with occasionally and they'll mention superheroes and I'll say, "Well, Lois & Clark..." And I'll hear, "Oh, that's right, you're a big Lois & Clark fan." And the inevitable (c'mon, say it with me. We've all heard it...) "Didn't that end years ago?" :rolleyes: And I think to myself, your point is? <g>

As for the second question, that was little more difficult to answer. I don't hide the fact that I write fanfic, but not everyone who knows me knows. Most do though. My family and friends tend to read my stories.

The most interesting thing though is trying to explain the social aspect of it. I'll mention a folc and someone will ask who? And then I try to explain, and they look at me like I'm weird. I try to explain that there are many more people like me, but... /me shrugs Like Anna and I explaining to people how we met. <g> "Through the internet?" "Because of Lois & Clark?"

Your point is? <g> Okay, I'm a little silly today.

Jana (who is now officially a 2nd year nursing student)

Because of my nut computer I can't vote but I'll express what happens here with me <g> I'm kind in between too. I mean my family knows that I love Lois and Clark and they have been putting up with my obsession for years. They don't really understand why I have to watch LnC a lot of times or why I have every episode on tape (or the fact that I made lots of copies and when the tapes get old I just record all the episodes again since the show is still airing in Brazil...talk about obsession ) or why I have lots of LnC pictures in my bedroom or things like that in my computer and they complain about that sometimes but I don't care anymore <g> Some friends know but they don't care about that. I try not to talk about LnC with people just if someone asks me something related to it (it's funny when people ask me about Smallville and I start to say why I hate it and ask if they ever watch Lois and Clark ) but most of the times I don't talk about it because people don't get it. They can be mean saying it is a childish show or it's a stupid thing.

It was weird when I found out LnC fanfic. My parents already thought I was crazy because I watch the episodes all the time but they think it is worse with fanfic. They don't understand. When I started writing my mom said I should write a real book so I could make some money. I told her that I write for fun and I love writing about Lois and Clark.

It was funny when I met Adam...everyone keeps asking me how I met him and it is weird to say I met him because of IRC They normally don't understand how deep is that but well they don't know all the story behind it since I can't tell them about LnC

Okay, so some people know but others don't.

Raquel (who just showed to everyone here how crazy she is )

...That's me to a Tee! My parents have no clue. They knew I was a FoLC when the show was ON, they knew I wrote fanfic when the show was ON, but if I was to tell them I STILL do, they'd prob tell me to "get over it, the show's not on anymore!"

So... As a result, the only way to read the works of Wanda Detroit is online. Yes, I do occasionally advertise my fanfic on LiveJournal. So I'm an Outed Online FoLC and pretty much semi-Closeted elsewhere.
But I love the mbs because at least here I can be open with people who STILL love L&C as much as I do!!!!
-Wanda

I don't deny it if people ask me, and if it comes up in a conversation (though it hardly ever does) I join in, but I don't just come up to people and say, "Oh, you know what happened to Lois and Clark in this story I read yesterday? Wait till I tell you all about it!" (well, I used do that to my best friend, but she would get annoyed and shut me up so I stopped)

It's just that no one I know watches or even knows the show. My generation (excluding rarities like me and Anna) doesn't know L&C because it started when I was 5 and ended when I was 9. I watched it from age 6 or 7, but hardly anyone else did- even though there were reruns, but come on, no one watches TV at 8 AM, school or summertime. Even I never woke up that early in the summer- I always set up my VCR to record for me.

I do tell people I write, and when they ask me what, I do say fanfic.

Let's just say that: If we ever got an assignment in school, to write a paper or a speech or something on the topic of our choice, I would probably choose Superman. Actually, my friend told me about this guy she saw that made a poster about Supes for school, but I never saw it .

Julie

Oh my gosh, this is the best poll ever. I'm loving reading everyone's responses!

Just like Pam, I'm hanging out all over the place. Everyone knows that I'm obsessed with Superman, and almost everyone knows that I write fanfic. Most of my friends and family (good-naturedly) torture me about it, but my dad actually thinks it's great because it's gotten me really into computers. I used to be afraid to even unhook or hook up my computer, and now I'm constantly upgrading it and installing new hardware and software. The other day my dad started to explain something computer-ish to me, and I was like, "Dad, I know how to do that." He laughed.

Side note: I've recently become obsessed with One Tree Hill. Anyone who's not watching it should give it a try for a couple of eps. The other day I was talking about it to my mom and she said, "Is this going to become like your Lois and Clark thing?" It is. It's that good.

Anyway, I'm absolutely fascinated that anyone could possibly keep it a secret. For me, it just seems to come up all the time. People ask me what I do in my spare time, or where I want to go to law school (in NC, with Annie!), or where I got that cool CD I'm listening to (from Sas for my b-day!). Or sometimes it'll be in a conversation that's totally unrelated, but something reminds me of something someone here said ("oh, my friend *insert FoLC's name here* said that the other day..."). For the most part that last convo doesn't end in a FoLC-admission, but try saying that to someone when the FoLC's name is Labby. People go "What??" and I have to go, "Well, her screenname is LabRat, but a lot of us just call her Rat or Labby." Just picture the look on someone's face when you tell them that.

EDIT AGAIN: I just thought of another good non-FoLC-not-getting-it story. I was explaining to my roommate about how there are some people in the fandom who don't get along with each other all that well, and she got this thoughtful look on her face and said, "So, it's kinda like real life then?" Appearently up to that point she thought we all behaved sort of robotically without getting to know each other or bonding or having arguments or anything of the sort. :rolleyes:

I know I already responded, but I saw that Anna (my long lost twin, but I was also long lost, so...) posted, so I just had to comment. <g>

Of course, my mom thought the same thing about Anna. So I guess both are moms were pretty happy when we came out of are first meeting unaxed. <g> As Anna nnd I both patiently tried to explain to our moms, "Anybody who knows that much about Lois & Clark doesn't have time to be a serial killer!"

Jana

EDIT: Anna added the robot thing while I was making my post, and I just had to add that I've kind of seen that in people too. They assume we post stories and never just enjoy conversing back and forth. Like that's weird or something!

Hello, long lost Twinnie!! (For the record, *Jana* was the one who was lost. I've been right here. )

Yup, I told my mom, "Anyone who writes waffy fanfics about a show that was cancelled that many years ago is not an axe murderer." And then I had to explain the word 'waffy'.

~Anna

EDIT: Now Jana edited while I was posting... gee, we're not alike or anything.

LOL at Jana and Anna!

I didn't start writing for close to two years after that, and then I didn't tell him at first. I think it was about three or four months after my first story was finished that I finally mentioned it - and he's been supportive ever since, though I do occasionally get grumbles about me needing to try to write for publication and actually earn some money from it. (Hah! As if! :rolleyes: ).

Anyway, until maybe four or so years ago that was it: only he knew. But since then I have mentioned, oh so casually, to one or two close friends that I have friends I met 'on the Internet'. And how did I meet them? Oh, we were all fans of the same TV series, and we're mostly writers, and we just get on well...

And most recently, when Kaethel came to stay with me last, she actually met one of the few RL friends of mine who knows that I write.

So... tiptoeing very gingerly out of the closet, I suppose, with no real intention of ever emerging fully. Apart from anything else, I couldn't imagine how my colleagues at work (university lecturers/professors) would react - let alone the students! :rolleyes:

More stories, please!!


Wendy

I'm kind of between options too. I've never been in the closet - I always jabbered on about going to Trek cons when I was younger to anyone who would listen. <G> Frankly that was less bravery than it was it never occurred to me to keep quiet. Probably should have done as I'm certain I was thought of as a little out there in left field as a result. But that was their problem, not mine. I always thought spending the weekend in a smoky disco getting drunk and falling flat on your face was a pretty weird way to spend your downtime. So we kind of evened out there. <g> Mostly we just accepted each other's weirdness.

And when I was working I'd spend a lot of time proofing the previous night's draft of a story and writing during my breaks, so no one could really miss my obssessions there.

Everyone I know knows my interests - but I generally don't talk much about it and didn't even when I was working. Just simply because I don't think anyone is much interested and I wouldn't want to bore them. <g>

I was very surprised a few years back when my brother mentioned he'd read some of my stories. Apparently he'd found Menolly's website which hosts some of them. But then he'd found some old poems of mine from way back when I left home to get married and he took over my bedroom and he read and enjoyed those too, so I wasn't too panicked by that. <g>

LabRat

In that case, Wendy, I hope you're writing under a pen name Otherwise, one curious Google search will out you!

I kind of get a kick out of telling people I met my friends on the Internet <g> Now, it helps a *lot* that several of those friends are within driving distance, but it's fun to see people's faces. One of the best times was when I was in labor Kelley couldn't face the delivery room, so Chris agreed to be my labor coach. The nurse was making conversation: "oh, you're friends, that's nice, how did you meet?" We sort of looked at each other, then one of us said, "We met on the Internet" ) turned out to have been closed, but we worked around that

My parents know about IRC, and the writing (my mom's read one or two of my stories, which is more than I can say for my husband), and the Kerths... "Hey, Mom, I'm glad you're visiting for the weekend and all, and it's great that my brother & his wife are here, too, but, um, I have to go online now to run this awards ceremony... could you watch the baby for me for the next four-five hours? Thanks!" <g> Although for a while I think she thought of you all as sort of a complicated computer game I was playing...

Oh, and then there was the time at a Tupperware party, with church friends... the consultant asked us all to introduce ourselves, including one thing that made us unusual. Naturally, I said that I'd written stories that were read all around the world, and that one had even been translated into French

PJ
who is actually more shy than all this makes her sound

edit: have to agree with LabRat -- I've been thought weird by many many people since grade school, so this wasn't that big of an adjustment for me.

I’m still pretty much in the closet. Only a few people know about my online activities. I’ve told my brother, although I doubt he still remembers everything I told him. <g> My best friend knows, and maybe one day she’ll even read what I write. I know she’d love to, but I’m still not sure I should let her read it. Then some other friend know I’m Folc as well, but most people don’t know I’m writing fanfic. It just never came up in conversations.

My parents do not know much about it. For quite some time I thought they wouldn’t understand it at all and would think everyone was a murderer or something like that. Gradually, I’m telling them about it. Right now, they know I read the stories and already think I’m crazy (well, nothing new about that! ). They also know I chat a lot and have friends all over the world. They just don’t know about the LnC connection with that yet. They really don’t understand my obsession with it. But they approve of me having friends abroad I haven’t even met. And that’s a good thing, since it’s hard to hide if you get gifts from them.

But that’s only very recent. Half a year ago, I met up with some folcs and I had to lie to leave the house. It got rather interesting since one of them stayed a few days at our house too. Now that worked out fine and since then I’ve told my parents more, since they must have been wondering what the heck I always did up my room.

Another fun moment was during the Alt Kerths. I got pretty stressed that last week trying to organize the whole thing. Especially since I also had exams that week. Needless to say, my exams didn’t go well. But explaining why it went so bad while I had spend so many hours ‘studying’ at my room was difficult. Luckily, I still passed all my classes, so it wasn’t a problem in the end. Except for the morning after the AK’s… or Kerts even. I was ready to go back to bed about two hours after I got up. <g> And really, that’s not me! It wasn’t like I could say ‘sorry Mom, but I had some online award ceremony last night and I only went to bed around 4am.’

Lately I do tell people more and more. And most of my friends are okay with it. Can’t say I’m any weirder than them, since they love other shows as much I do with LnC. But it certainly makes life a lot easier if I don’t have to be careful with what I’m saying.

Saskia

I'm more in the closet than out - the only person who really knows about my LnC obsession is my husband, who, oddly enough, is probably the one person in the world who finds it really weird! He can't understand obsessions of any kind - especially one based on a television show that ended so many years ago. Since I tend to go into anything that so holds my interest at about 110%, I often feel guilty, like a drug addict sneaking a fix in a dark alley, hoping I won't get caught, because I spend all my spare time writing and reading and chatting.

I've not really told anyone that I write fanfic and have only shown my mom a couple of my stories. Mostly, I keep this "hobby" to myself because I'm afraid people won't take me seriously. Since fanfic brings little to the writer other than personal satisfaction (i.e., no cash or mainstream accolades), I think people tend to see it as very frivolous, and I hate the feeling of having to defend myself for indulging in an activity that I really enjoy. Somehow, saying that you stayed up until 2 am to write a fanfic sounds a lot crazier than staying up until 2 am to finish your great American novel <g>.

As a matter of fact, recently, I asked my brother for some legal advice for Rage, and I told him it was for a story exercise for my writing class rather than for a fanfic. Of course, when he wanted to read the finished story, I had to confess!

Also, like others have mentioned, the whole notion of meeting people and making friends through the internet holds a certain unreal quality. Kind of like - "don't you have any real, breathing, living friends that you need to find them on-line?" Ever since I stopped working and am home alone with two small kids, it seems even more isolating, I think, to admit to such an addiction because the image of the lonely stay-at-home mother is perpetuated.

What I didn't know until I discovered this fandom is that such internet relationships have a whole other benefit because you get to meet people who you would never get to know due to geography. And also, these friendships offer as much and sometimes more than ones with real, living 3D people standing in front of you. There is a certain level of unconditional acceptance and shared passion that really creates a strong bond.

I don't know if I would ever come completely out of the closet unless it was to other fans. I can't imagine stating to all of the other moms at the next Daisy troop meeting or playdate that I have to rush home to check the boards for feedback on my latest post <G>. I'm just too afraid that they would all look at me like I'd sprouted a third eye in the middle of my forehead.

But if anyone in my "real life" wanted to discover my secret, they can use my real name on Google to see if it would pop up a story or two!

Lynn

Oh the joys of dodging the "how do you know each other" question.... As someone who is totally closeted, it's something I have a lot practice in. Sarah was the first folc I met and we were both wary of telling people how we met. So we told people that we met through a mutual friend at a party right before I moved to NC, so that was why most of our friendship was developed online. This lie actually worked really well - my friends all still believe this - but I don't think her parents bought it for long. After awhile, they would make comments like, "Well, when you guys met online..." We'd just look at each other trying to figure out if it was a trap.

My friends know or at least know a lot about Sarah, Tracey, Pam and Kathy, so when all else fails, and someone asks who I know a folc, I just say, "Oh, they're a friend of ...."

The best though was this summer when Sarah, Tracey, Kaylle, LauraU, Bethy, Jill and I all went to the beach together. We were sitting around one day when these two guys approached and talked to us for awhile. They seemed really nice and we had a great time talking to them for awhile, until the dreaded "so, how do y'all know each other?". After a long, uncomfortable silence, Tracey says, "Well, we all went to college." True - note the artful dodging of the lie. She didn't claim we went there together. <G> "Oh great," the guy replied. "Where did y'all go." Yet another long pause. Then, "Well...we all transfered a lot." The guy looked at us like we were absolutely nuts and let it drop. They probably still talk about those weird girls they met at the beach and wonder how we really met. <G>

As for the googling thing, that's exactly why I don't use my full name for fanfic. I don't want someone stumbling across it. I'm not secretive at all about my identity - tons of folcs know my full name, address, phone number, etc - but I don't want my full name on stories. Same for email. For a long time I had my primary email as the address on my stories both on the boards and on the archives, but then I realized that it's just as easy to google someone's email address as their name (in fact, it's a trick I use a lot) so I created a secondary yahoo account. I figure that's enough steps that no one is going to find it by accident. If anyone looks hard enough to find it, they deserve to know. <G>

Annie

Yeah, that brings up a good point, Annie... how *did* you meet me, anyway? Or am I just someone you babysit for?

PJ

Yeah.... I was just thinking about this. Oh the tangled web we weave....

Actually, I've been talking about you for so long that none of my friends question how we met. I think most assume that you are a mom I know from nannying - someone I did playgroups with. But thinking back, I think there has only been one time I was asked, and I told them that you were a friend of Kathy's. They think I've known Kathy since I was a small child (not entirely certain how this belief came into being - I think because I've mentioned that she's from MI and they know my family lived there when I was little) so they assume you went to high school with her or something. It's funny how people just believe what they want to believe. I really just never explain how I know people. I let my friends make up their own explanations and don't bother telling them they are wrong.

Annie

I'm pretty much in.

Back when I first started to watch the show, my classmates and I talked about it all the time. I was by far the most obsessed with it, but since almost everyone in my class watched the show, it wasn't a problem to talk about it openly and freely.

It all changed when I continued to be a fan while others moved on, particularly the year after, when I graduated from high school and found myself in a new environment, with new friends and all. When I got a computer and discovered fanfic, then it became even more of a secret for me. Telling people that I was a fan of a TV show was one thing that I could still do a little, albeit with a great deal of difficulty. Telling them that I wrote stories about it was impossible, and it's been pretty much impossible for years. When I was in high school, being a fan of a TV show was something normal that didn't make others raise eyebrows... I doubt I would have told them I wrote fanfic if I had then, but at least I made no secret of watching Lois and Clark. It got a little more complicated afterwards, especially when I entered a branch where "culture" sometimes seems very dogmatically defined. :p

Sometimes it creates interesting situations, actually. I have to say that I've had that type of conversation twice in the past week.

It usually start with an innocuous question, such as: "Where are you going for the holiday?" or "Where does that obsession with English come from?" or somesuch. Let's take the former as an example.

X: "Where are you going for the holiday?"
Kaethel: "Italy / England."
X: "Oh? Camping? Staying at a hotel?"
Kaethel: "No, I have a friend there and I'm staying with her for a week."
X: "A French friend?"
Kaethel: "No."
X: "Nice! How did you get to know her?"
Kaethel: "Er... through the... uh... Internet."

Two types of reaction then:

X: (frowns disapprovingly) "Oh."
It's usually very easy to change the subject then; that type of person does it themselves.

or...

X: (raised eyebrow) "Really? On a chat room? What chat room did you go to?"
That's where I have to grumble something and change the subject. I don't feel comfortable telling them about the Lois and Clark connection.

My best friend and her husband know about it, though. Maud was watching the show back on the first year I became a fan, and we actually watched it together. So she knew I was a FoLC from the beginning. I never hid from her that I was hanging out on IRC with people who like that TV show, and she thinks it's great. What she doesn't know... or didn't know until a couple of months ago, is that I write. I don't know why it took me so long to tell her, considering I trust her and know she'd never be judgmental about it. But actually I haven't told her I write fanfic. I just happened to mention in my CV, which she and her husband helped me complete, that one of my hobbies is writing. However, I doubt they have failed to put two and two together then. Actually, neither of them raised an eyebrow when I mentioned writing, which makes me suspect that they've known all along. But the subject was never raised between us since. ).

But considering it took me years to actually hint at it with my best friend, I doubt I'll ever completely come out of the closet. And the reason for that is simple. Writing is something that can be so very personal that sometimes you feel uncomfortable talking about it or sharing it with people who might not understand what's the interest of inventing stories featuring a long-vanished TV show. And saying it out loud means taking the risk of being laughed at, misunderstood, or even rejected. Someone can make a comment that seems funny or smart to them, just to tease you, but because it touches something very deep and very personal, it can easily hurt. I guess that's why I'm staying in the closet.

Kaethel

This is simply hilarious. I thought I was the only one who walked around with this "guilty secret."

For me it's that I'm devoted to Superman. And there is no nice way to say that. Absolutely no way to say that and sound cool. And harder still for a grown woman. I know for certain I am the only mom in the carpool line who kills the time by studying 'the Ultimate Guide to the Man of Steel.' And while it isn't in a plain brown wrapper- I am not holding it up for the world to see!

When I found L&C fanfic, and it hasn't been that long ago, I was reading it on the sly. Telling myself I was just curious, and that was all. Whenever my husband would walk through the room, I would close it all down, like it was porn, or something. He was the first one who knew, and he still didn't *know.*

After I wrote my first story and sent it in, I told *no one.* For months and months and months. Then one day my brother- who is also a journalist- asked would I help him with a something, wondered what I had been writing lately, and there was this long, long pause as I wrestled the dilemma, to tell or not to tell. He is completely trustworthy, so I fessed up. He went straight to the archive and found me easily and sent me extensive feedback. However, just a few weeks later my cousin, who lives on the other side of the country, sent me an email "cool Superman stories." My brother had blabbed far and wide, and I was out to all family members.

I write plays for our small town's little theatre. When they needed something that would draw the college crowd for this fall, and I was completely without inspiration, I just 'adapted' one of my L&C stories. It worked out nicely, even without super references and kryptonite cages, etc.. However, when the director asked me to stand and talk a bit about where my inspiration for the piece came from, she caught me entirely off guard. I stammered for a few minutes, wheels in head turning feverishly, and finally answered rather loftily, "Who really knows where ideas are born?"

Call me 1/2 out and 1/2 in.

CC (who looks perfectly normal on the outside)

ROFL, CC!!

Actually, the reason I'm posting again is that I just noticed the number of writers who haven't even told their partner/spouse that they write. And I just want to ask... how do you get away with it? I mean, are you home alone all day or something and just never write or check email or board posts or whatever when s/he's around?


Wendy (whose husband actually works away from home four or five days a week and therefore is really only home at weekends, but she still found herself having to confess a couple of months into writing )

Not many people know I actually write. That's because I don't write much. My husband knows about the few stories I've worked on, and I showed my family my last story because they were in it. I also posted the link on my livejournal.

A few more people know I read stories. There was one girl in my unit who liked Lois and Clark, but she was more interested in talking about shows that were currently on, like Buffy and Witchblade. She wasn't too interested in fanfic.

I still find it odd that people like about meeting people online. I have no qualms with telling people about this friend I have in PA, or NY, or here or there, that I met online. I've made many many great friends that way. Of course, when you tell people that you met your husband online, it doesn't seem so odd to make friends online, too!

Well, I'm not married but I do have a roommate and most people say we are like an old married couple. I get away with it because a) although I often write in his presence, I never check the boards or do anything that screams "LOIS AND CLARK" in his presence and b) because he knows that I write all the time. So when he sees me writing, he assumes it's an original fiction story. I just don't bother to correct him.

Annie

I voted early on but haven't posted yet. I am loving this thread ... I have laughed so hard at so many of the stories (especially the fact that Pam and I went to high school together! LOL, Annie!) and I don't think there has been a post by anyone who is "mostly in" that hasn't made me nod my head and think of a similar situation in my own FoLC life.

Short answer is the only people who know how involved I am with L&C are my husband (who is mostly supportive but does like to tease, which I call him on and why he's never been allowed to read anything I've written, though occasionally I will mention a plotline or something brief like that), my best friend (who read some of my early stories years ago and was supportive but has since slipped into the "why are you still doing this?" arena, much to my disappointment), and my mom (who knows that I'm active and has read and enjoyed my S5/6 eps, but when I gave her "The One That Got Away", she was more dismissive, "oh, well, that one was just a romance." Well, yeah, duh, and that's the last one I let you read. <g>)

I think you hit the nail right on the head, Kae. This is exactly why I don't discuss it with most people, or even at length with those people closest to me. They just don't get it, and because of that, I can't trust them not to say something -- intentionally or unintentionally -- that will be hurtful.

On the plus side, though, I've recently made a new friend who is also active in an online fandom, though for a different show. And it is *so* nice to know someone who *understands* what it's like, and who actually got excited when I admitted I write fanfic (she asked me right off) and even went to our Archive to read one of my stories. Oh yes, and we've been having "girls night" where we take turns each week showing each other episodes of our shows ... and she'd told me she is loving watching L&C! So at least I can be out with someone in real life.

Great thread,

Kathy

OK, CC. Now I know that we are really twins separated at birth!

For me, it's creeping around the Graphic Novels aisle at Barnes and Noble, almost always the only female and definitely the only mother-ish looking person perusing the Superman books <g>. This summer, when I bought an "Unofficial Guide to Smallville" paperback, I had to wait until my mom and aunt, whom I was shopping with, were not anywhere near the vicinity when I checked out at the cash stand!

Same thing with my husband - even to this day. Like I said, he doesn't understand any kind of obsession, so I do sometimes feel like I'm looking at verbotin websites.

But I really do agree with Kae - any kind of writing involves putting much of your inner-self out there, and when you are ready to show it to others, you need to be pretty certain they are going to accept you and what you've written. Not that they will love it or have no positive feedback, but at least within the fandom, you don't have to explain your subject matter.

Great topic - perhaps we need to start some kind of LnC Anonymous support group!

L.

Except those groups are usually for people who want to stop their addiction ... I'm happily waiting for my next fix, LOL.

Kathy

Well, I answered that I'm complete in on both counts, but that's not entirely true. No-one close to me knows - the only people I trust with the secret are people who don't matter so much to me. That probably says something horribly deep and psychological about me, but, hey, you all know I'm a sad hurt/comfort freak already, so what do I care? <g>

None of my close friends and family use the internet socially, so they just don't understand what it's all about. They'd cart me off to the looney bin if I told them I write fanfic. Actually, come to think of it, people do know that I have friends I made through the internet, and what the common link is, but I certainly don't admit to coming on line and drooling over Clark Kent most nights <g>. By the way, in case they ever asks you, we talk about films, TV, politics and the weather, OK? Never, ever, Superman. Got that?

Sometimes, I regret not being able to tell people I write. Now and then something almost slips out in conversation - the topic might be related to writing technique, say, or how writers work - but I have to bite my tongue and keep quiet.

Yvonne

I haven't read all the responses, because I haven't had time. But I'll post my response anyway.

Well, I have no problem telling everyone. The thing is, L&C doesn't have many friends here in Greece, and many people only have a vague idea of what the Internet can offer :rolleyes: So I only tell people in three cases:
1) They're close friends of mine. So, as they know everything about me, they have to know about this too
2) Something related to fanfiction or FoLCdom happened, and I want to talk about it. That includes telling my parents how people compliment me about my capability of speaking English And, be sure, that if I win a Kerth (don't shoot!! I said, if) the whole school will learn about FoLCdom (I never said I'm not annoying :p )
3) I'm having a conversation about hobbies, writing or foreign languages. Then I explain in short what I'm doing.

So, how many people know? Let's see...

-Many of my friends (10 people at least).
-My parents and brothers (well, I don't know how much my 9 year old brother can understand about fanfiction :p but the 14 year old is doing just fine)
-My English teacher knows. (!) I have even used her as a BR. (!!!)

Now, how many people have read fanfic of mine?

Apart from my teacher, three of my friends have. Two of them did because I asked them to... I was a newbie and wanted to see what they'd think. (They really liked what they read... One of them told me I should send it to be turned into a movie!!) The third one asked me to give her something to read when I told her I was writing, and since then, she's read several stories of mine - all after her own request. And there's one more to whom I've promised to give a fic I'm working on (very slowly), and she's asked me a few tmes about it.

Jana's story reminded me of something that happened recently. Something happened (don't remember what) and I said "Oh, that's like it happened once at L&C" and my friend (one of my closest ones) said "Oh, no, not again!!". She then explained that I had already mentioned that incident another time

Seriously, I see no reason to hide it. It's something I love doing and it's just included in the Anna package It's useful too... Try comparing my current English writing with my one-year-ago English writing. You won't believe how much it has improved!

Interesting poll.
See ya,
AnnaBtG.

Wow, great thread!

I remember the first time I heard of anybody (it was Annie actually) being THAT closeted about it. I was truly amazed, it makes me laugh to know that Jordan still doesn't know what to think of me

It's funny, before I finally de-lurked, I was a closeted to you all as a reader for almost 2 years...... but most anybody that knows me in RL, knows that I'm a huge superman fan, folc & fanfic reader. I have said that one of the benifits of my getting older is that you can admit your obbsessions, and not care what people think. So now mostly, I just try to stop droning on about it all BEFORE my friends get too glassy eyed! :rolleyes:

I have received a variety of reactions over the years to being a folc. Some have just nodded their head (thinking, well this does NOT surprise me about her <g>), some have truly NOT gotten it, and others can't figure out how I can considered anybody I have only chatted with online to be a freind I have one very close freind who is really great..... he not only endures me relating all my folc news, but I recap (in pretty significant detail) of whatever fabulous story I'm currently reading or have just read! I have to say tho, that one of the great advantages to being "out" about my folcdom is that I have been given some terrific prizes my friends have found out thrift shopping and garage saleing. What a terrific bonus

I voted in the second half of the poll not because I write, but because it wouldn't let me vote at all without voting there too. But I really don't know how out I would be about my writing. I totally understand how personal your work is when you write, and am not sure I would ever tell anybody that I had written fanfic. Heck, I'm not even sure I would even tell all of you!!!

S (who is really glad that she finally came out to all of you )

I said all the way out -- which is mostly true. In high school my friends all knew I was into Star Trek. (Actually, some of them were avid readers of my ST fanfic. )The ones I'm in still in contact with just figure this is Rivka's current nutty thing.

When I told my mom about a letter I got in the mail (handwritten! and everything! ) yesterday from an online friend, she asked if it was someone I knew from this board or my other board.

Of course, the time I sent a draft of the fic I co-wrote to my lawyer was totally accidental. Turns out she used to watch the show -- go figure.

OTOH, it doesn't usually come up when casually talking to other parents at my kids' school, so most of them would have no idea.

Hah! That's what you think. We'd get it out of you.

I know, I'm posting on this thread again, but I just had to tell another FoLC-out-of-the-closet story.

Last spring I took a class called "Comparative Study of Death." 70% of our grade was a fifteen page final paper that could be on any subject related to death. I chose to write on death in the Superman mythos. My roommate thought I was nuts and that I would probably fail the class for writing on such a silly topic (although she didn't say it that harshly).

The paper was tons of fun to write, and I ended up getting a 4.0 in the class. Because I didn't get perfect grades on the stuff that was the other 30% of my grade, that means that I actually got extra credit for writing on such a creative topic! Needless to say, my roommate had to eat her words.

I still wonder exactly what the teacher thought of it... for all I know, he lurks on these boards... *g*

I have to say, though, that I do know somewhat how the in-the-closet-FoLCs feel. I don't like surfing around the boards or anything that (like Annie said) screams Lois and Clark when I'm in public. I don't care if people who know me know what I'm doing and think I'm a geek, but for some reason I guard my feelings more around people I don't know. I just don't trust them not to say something hurtful, whether intentionally or unintentionally.

No kidding, CC! There is just absolutely no possible way to say that you can like Superman and retain your dignity. I think I get away with it now because I'm a college student, but I worry about next year when I'm in law school. There is just not going to be any way to be taken seriously as a law student if someone knows that I have a Superman poster on my wall, a lunch box on my shelf, a book on my coffee table, every episode of Lois and Clark on tape, and notebooks full of printed fanifcs in my closet. There is just no way.

~Anna

Fun Thread !

I'm definitely IN the closet. I do surf the fanfic boards when my husband is around but I usually minimize the pictures, etc and I work on my L&C videos more or less in private. (I don't think my husband knows that a large part of my hard drive is filled with Lois and Clark scenes )

One friend knows I've done a few music videos, but didn't really appreciate the sample I showed her.

I have bragged to several people about being a member of an online community with members all over the world, but not mentioned WHAT online group. In any case, they are impressed!

When I print out stories and read them when traveling, I'm sure everyone thinks I'm working hard.

I agree with others that other people "just don't get it". It is so much more fun to have everyone here to share our passion with!

Thanks for being in my closet

I am popping out all over.

First, and closest to me, my husband has always known. He writes adventures for role-playing games (also non-profit), so he understands that I just enjoy writing for no reason whatsoever. Sometimes, I'll bounce story ideas off him, or try to get him to beta-read for me. Unfortunately, if he's not in the mood to read, it's like pulling teeth. And the more I nag the deeper he digs his heels in. Anyway, when he finally does read something I've just finished, he says something noncommital like, "Yeah, it was good." I feel like shaking him (IF he wasn't 7 inches taller and 60 pounds heavier than me) and screaming, "What!?!? What was good?! Give me specifics!!!" Quite a few times, we'll be watching tv and the plot will be really obvious...and we'll predict what's going to happen next...then it turns out we were right..and one of us will look at the other and say, "We could write this stuff..."

Craig also puts up with my Dean obsession. Lately, I've been collecting his movies and watching them when I'm bored. Craig'll come into the room, see what I'm watching and say, "Oh, look. It's Dean!"

Since Craig has dark hair, broad shoulders and glasses, I like to tease him and call him "my Clark." He'll usually step back and strike a typical Supermanish pose.

Next, there's my mom. She watched the show when it was on. Then we'd call each other and talk about it, but we've also done that with other shows, too. She'll nowhere near as obsessed with it as I am, but I remember once when we were talking about an X-Files episode where they were stuck in a time loop and her comment was, "I liked it better when 'Lois & Clark' did it." She's read some of my stories, and even gave me the title for one of them, but I know she's not really that interested, so I don't push it.

My husband's family...I'm not sure about. I know that they know I like Superman...and I think they know I write stories, but I'm not sure they know everything...or even want to know.

Most of my friends know that I write fanfic and for which show, mostly because I carry a notebook with my everywhere and will pull it out to write whenever I have five minutes to myself between other stuff. When someone asks what I'm writing, I usually say "just short stories for fun." Sometimes they'll press and ask if I've been published. Then I'll tell them the rest and either they drop it or want to know more. A few have even asked for the url. One friend, when I told her the stories were based on LnC, went on to tell me how she and her neighbor and all their kids used to go to one house or the other and they'd spread a blanket on the floor and make popcorn and watch the show every week. She said that her kids actually looked forward to their Superman night. She is steadily becoming one of my closest friends lately...and the best part is...her name is Lois!

Mostly, I guess I agree with what someone else already said...the older I get, the less I care what others think. I have a Superman air freshener hanging in my car (the scent's all gone, but I refuse to get rid of it), I have Superman pajamas, I read fanfic on my PDA and download LnC wallpaper at work, and I named my cat Colleen Calle Spear! Pretty much everyone I know knows my obsession (my boss' boss was even discussing my writing with people in California when he was visiting a client!) and they've all accepted it, and me, as is.

This is me - way in the back of the closet. My husband knows, though not until I'd won a kerth for BNA and then I was sick to my stomach the rest of the night until I told him. Turns out he already knew cuz of an email inadvertantly sent to the wrong address and then he googled... Am pretty sure his dad/bro know because they google our last name all the time and they've mentioned something like 'i saw your name online, some award or something' and i'm like 'huh'? I had labby change my last name on the archive but it still comes up.

I hinted recently to a fairly new, good friend of mine that I was reading some old stories I'd written, but she didn't pick up on - or at least didn't mention it in her reply email, but it was short and only mentioned one of the many things I'd mentioned to her.

Missy and I have been wanting to get together for years now, but my husband still isn't too sure about it. He doesn't know that I met another FoLC from my area who has since disappeared. I did recently meet a lady from a local group I'm in who gave me an exercise glider thingy. He thinks it's a group that talks about parenting and such [which we do] but that's not the main purpose of the group. You can thank Kathy for that one - shiny sink and all. He was okay with that though was starting to get worried when I was gone almost an hour because we'd gotten to talking. And he's been using the exercise thingy too so...

Lots of people I know know that I have friends around the world - that I talk with people all over the states, Asia, Great Britain, France, Italy, etc online. I also teach online so I'm online all the time and it goes with the territory. I don't usually have the fic boards up while my husband is home and I've been trying not to chat as much when he's home. It's mostly been on AIM lately since RL has just been too busy too keep up on IRC. In fact, I hadn't checked the boards in months until just recently.

Two little girls take up a lot of my time too. Dunno how I'm going to introduce them to L/C. It's also kind of hard to explain to my husband how someone in England knew how to get chocolate to my house, or presents for the girls, or whatever. "Honey, we just got a package from Washington. Any idea what's in it? And who do we know in Washington?" "Well, um, er, um..." Actually, he's getting slightly more okay with it since I don't just give out our address, but anyone with a rudimentary knowledge of yahoo could get it so...

Okay, enough of a book. I'm supposed to be cleaning so I can write later. And the two year old is getting into stuff she shouldn't. Mom to the rescue!
CM

I'm in the closet. All the way. My parents know I write, but I write tons of original fic as well, so they just assume that's what I'm writing.

My brother knows I read fanfic, but that's because every time he comes into the room, I minimize it and he thought I was reading R rated material or something. So I told him it was fanfic, and then explained what fanfic was. He doesn't have a clue about LnC.

I have one friend who knows I write, but that's because I helped her with a paper she had to write on a "publication oriented website."

Whenever I mention a FolC, my parents assume it is someone I know through my speech and debate group. I travel all over the US and know people all over from that, so it's an effective cover. I'd never lie about it to my parents, it's just never come up.

Nqoire the closeted person.

Anna, when I read this I just had to laugh. I am a lawyer. I was called to the bar in 1991. And it never even occurred to me (until I first read a thread like this one) that I should be in the closet.

There are judges, defense counsel, crown counsel, court clerks, court reporters, native court workers and probation officers who know that I write Lois and Clark fanfic. Often if I have a legal question for a Lois and Clark story, I'll run the idea past a group of my lawyer friends and we'll brainstorm about it for a few minutes. I've let a number of people at work read my stories and I'll often sit and work on my stories while waiting for my matters to be called in court. The first time I won a Kerth, I told everyone I ran into in court over the next few days that I was now an 'award winning author.' I even had a lawyer take me out for lunch to congratulate me on my win .

And if you check out my work website, you'll find a link to my Lois and Clark pages.

So am I in the closet? Not exactly

ML

Really, ML? You just made my day!

~Anna

LOL! It's been so much fun reading all the stories.

You could say I'm half out half in :rolleyes:

My parents know that I LOVE LnC and that I can spend hours in front of the computer reading fanfic ('cause I don't write)and checking the boards,but they take it as a 'weird hobby' that improved my english (Before my LnC obsession, the boards and fanfic I couldn't read/understand/write a paragraph in english )
My mom even watch some episodes with me when I wake up early(because the show it's on 6:30 am

A friend of mine who didn't know anything about me liking LnC, entered in my bedroom and her comment was 'So...you like Superman...'

Carolyn

Actually, come to think of it, I've admitted I'm a fan of the series on our Intranet at work.

But I'm banking on no-one looking at that section much <g>. Those who do actually find their way there probably deserve a little insider info as a reward.

Yvonne

Hello!

I am relatively new to the boards, though I have been closeted to everybody as a reader of LnC fanfics for the past year. I rediscovered LnC a year ago and have been engrossed in all these wonderful fanfics since.

LOL, Yvonne, so did I!

When my company bought two new airplanes they asked the employees to come up with original names to christen them. The older models have regular cities names or are named after famous persons. Quite predictable, right? So I suggested 'Metropolis' and 'Gotham City' to honour the Superman and Batman fans. Needless to say, I didn't win the competition! Too frivolous, I guess. But after the admissions had been published on the Intranet, collegues began commenting on my 'comic books obsession'. If only they knew! Most of them were positive, though.

Thank you, Tenoh27, on behalf of all the writers. Welcome to the mbs; glad you decided to de-lurk!

Ursie

Am I in or out of the closet...hmmm...

Well, I haven't exactly jumped up on table in the cafeteria at school, screaming, "I love Lois & Clark!!"

But if a person pays attention to me, it won't take him too long to discover that I do have an obsession with LNC. My locker at school has got a huge S-shield all over it on the inside, and you'd also see that a lot of my drawings are based on the show. If you walk into my room, you'll also see a small poster of the Daily Planet logo, a news clip about Margot Kidder and Teri Hatcher, and a huge picture of Dean Cain in the suit with his jacket on. And, of course, a glass framed photo of Teri Hatcher with her autograph on it.

But when people see this, they just think, "Oh, it's just one more thing about that girl..." No one who knows me would ever say, "She's such a typical teenager."

As for the rest of how my room looks like, you won't find any movie poster of the latest film with the latest hunk in Hollywood: lousy movie, good-looking guy. No, here it's all about the *real* movies - classics. Grease, Breakfast at Tiffany's, Cabaret (the broadway musical, Teri hatcher) and I've also got my room decorated with a poster of Audrey Hepburn, Julia Roberts and James Dean, and there's also the *huge* "carpet" of the movie Hannibal that's probably about 8 x 3 feet big.. Yeah, I know, big fan of Anthony Hopkins.

So I've got really nothing to hide... Although I must admit that if my family asked what I was doing, I'd say, "I'm writing" or "I'm making videos", and not "I'm writing LNC fanfic" and "I'm making trailers for LNC fanfic."

But if they found out, I really wouldn't care if they had anything bad to say about it. Because I know for myself that this isn't just "any" fan-community. Integrity and quality are just two of the many words that can describe all this. And that's enough for me.

So, am I in or out of the closet? I'm in the closet, but it's open for everyone to come and take a look inside!

Pelican

Dear Xanabee and other wonderful writers ,
_________________________________________________
Thank you, Tenoh27, on behalf of all the writers. Welcome to the mbs; glad you decided to de-lurk!
_________________________________________________

You are welcome, but the thanks and pleasure was all mine (and all FoLCs, I think).

Best wishes.

When it comes to being in or out of the closet, I don't really know the answer to that. I haven't told anyone that I'm a big L&C fan, but I think my wife knows from occasionally seeing this message board on the screen, though I don't know for sure.

As for writing fanfic, the most I've told my wife is that I wrote one story without any details. She certainly has not read anything that I've written.

So in a way, I think I'm in the closet, but I have no way to be sure unless I ask, and I'm petrified to ask.

My family has always known I'm obsessed with anything LnC related. They always tease me mercilessly about it. Last night I hinted to my dad that I am still a LnC fan and he told me to 'Get a life'.

As for my friends only a few very close friends know.

to your dad, then, and all others who think like him.

I have a life, thank you very much, as do most if not all of us. Enjoying a fandom doesn't mean you're stuck in your parents' basement, disconnected from the "real world." I've got quite enough reality going on, really -- husband, two kids (one of them autistic), church activities, support group meetings, etc. This is a great way for me to relax and unwind. And this is a community here, just not a geographically-based one. My best "real life" friends were all Internet/FOLC friends first -- people of all ages that I would otherwise never have come in contact with.

Okay, sorry, Isis, didn't mean to dump on your dad, but that sort of comment annoys me

PJ
who thinks media fans are far more sensible than sports freaks...

You mean we're supposed to have lives?

Oh crap!

Tank (who now has to look into this 'life' thing)