Lois & Clark Forums Forums General Discussion Off Topic FREE HUGS!! Except I'm a germaphobe...

Did an experiment in sociology today, and was wondering what other people thought on the matter.

A guy walks up to you carrying a sign that says "Free Hugs" on it. Do you hug him? Do you not? Do you ridicule him after you walk away? If you didn't accept the hug, then why? If you did, think about your first impressions of the hugger, your own motivation, and race and gender. If it were a female who approached you, would you be more or less likely to hug her?

The results from today were fairly surprising. Walking around for three hours during the heat of the day in Old Sac might not be the idealest of circumstances (and I think I got heat stroke from it), but we had people from all different backgrounds and blocks of life surrounding us and it was an interesting and successful experiment.

Just curious to know whether the results are near universal or if it's just a California thing.

Short answer - no. Gender would make no difference - I wouldn't hug any stranger. Two reasons. One, I guard my personal space jealously. I'd have to know someone pretty well before engaging in any form of casual, physical contact. And, two, I'm highly suspicious of the motives of strangers by nature. I've watched The Real Hustle. I'd be wondering if it was a ruse to pick my pocket or pinch my iPod.....

LabRat

I agree that it definitely would skew your results depending on the appearance and dress of the hugger. (Oh, Mouse, you hotty, you.) Would a dirty homeless man tempt you to hug more than Dean Cain (dressed as Clark Kent)? I'm guessing NOT! If you were a man and the hugger looked like Teri Hatcher (or Cat Grant or Mindy Church), he'd be more likely to hug her than if she looked like a toothless, greasy heroine addict. I'm guessing the only stranger I'd consider hugging would be a grandmother type or one who reminded me of a mom, because they'd seem safer than just an average joe / jane, or possibly one who was a teenage girl. But like Labrat, the thought of hugging a stranger makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't even like hugging people that I've met at a party or dinner at the end of the evening. Hugging, IMO, is for close friends, family, and small children, not for aquaintances or stangers. That's what handshakes are for. Don't even get me started on the even more uncomfortable cheek-kiss. :p

For myself (and I am just talking about myself) I am apt to give a "half-hug" to most of the people that have the "free hugs" signs. Then again the few times I see those it's usually at the university in the area.

Interesting. As I stated in the title, yes I'm a bit of a germaphobe (not to mention I have major trust issues), so I was *not* one of the people giving the free hugs and I just stuck to the interviews. So, Labby, I totally understand where you are coming from. I might support it, but I would not accept a free hug.

Appearance did make a big difference. So did race and gender. We had one guy dressed up in his old boy scout/eagle scout costume, and he said he mostly got hugs from older ladies (and a few creepy men). One girl was all tatted up and not really dressed nicely, but still received more hugs than any of the men. One girl (shocker here :rolleyes: ) got about 53 hugs, which was the most out of anyone. The guy in my group, although he was dressed in his culinary uniform, only got nine hugs, because he was a male and likely because he was African American. (And he's one of the friendliest guys I know, too!)

The thing that I found most surprising was in the interviews afterwards. Most of the women who gave hugs stated that they did so because it seemed like the guy was sweet or that it was a nice idea. The surprising part was that they said it didn't matter whether it was a guy or girl giving the hugs, whereas a lot of the men said that they'd hug a girl, but would never hug a guy, because it would feel too threatening. (I had figured that it would be harder for a woman to hug a guy because it would feel threatening or intimidating.) Instead, sometimes the men would fistbump the guy hugger, to show support but still stay distant.

Some people though hugged because they really needed it. The professor reminded us to keep things light, but take it seriously for that exact reason. One guy had a woman come up and hug him who afterwards said she did it because she wanted to feel safe in the arms of a man again (she had been abused in the past). A guy came up and hugged someone because he said his younger brother was killed the night before and he really needed the comfort. Seriously. We met with some pretty intense stuff yesterday, along with the casual, and all around it was an interesting experience. Next time I see someone with a free hug sign, I'm going to *try* (as a therapeutic process, maybe) to give a hug... or at least show support in some way. It's a better idea than I thought it would be.

Ditto what Labby said. I'd only hug someone I knew and then it would mean something.

As a born and bred New Yorker, I've seen everything and anything in the city. Well, I thought so. Never seen Free Hugs people before.

However, I would not participate, man or woman giving out the hugs.

The whole idea weirds me out, getting a hug from a random stranger. What other motives do they have? Picking my pocket? Are they mentally unstable? Do they have some communicable disease? Plus, I just don't know them, and that's creepy enough.

On the flip side, if it was a celebrity, I would absolutely participate, regardless of the gender of the celebrity.

I think, in my mind, because I wouldn't feel like they are a stranger. Because I know that "hey, that's Dean Cain," or "Oh, Lucy Lawless, rock on." So I would totally be cool with that.

And yes, I have asked for celebrity hugs before, when at conventions, if possible. I'm proud to say that I've hugged Bruce Campbell and Kevin Sorbo.

Then again, I'm a huggy person with people I know.

Absolute agreement from me. I wouldn't even hug Dean Cain if he'd happen to carry one of those signs. Hugging people I know casually makes me uncomfortable - so why would I want to hug a total stranger? Plus, there's always the thought that the hugger might have an ulterior motive, like picking my purse or whatnot.

I would say no for two reasons, neither of which have anything to do with race/gender/age:

1: I actually do have an issue with germs and being touched by people. I don't even really hug my family members unless it's one of those old lady relatives you don't have a choice about hugging.

2: I grew up in a big-ish city (Toronto), so I'm basically a jaded cynic. How do I know that this person doing a social experiment isn't actually about to pick my pocket when I hug them? If someone can pick your pocket in half a second when they bump into you on the street, they can surely rob you blind in the two - three seconds, if not longer, hug?

However, I did see the video ages ago of the original guy who did this (in Australia, I believe), and it was moving to see how people reacted.

That's absolutely fascinating, Mouserocks. As a social experiment, it seems to have brought up some interesting results.

Glad I'm not the only cynic around either. <g> Although it's sad the world we live in make hugs an object of suspicion.

LabRat

Hmmm... This seems to me to have the makings of a fanfic about it...

Joy,
Lynn

p.s., Put me in the "I'd refuse a hug" camp. I, too, would wonder about the person's motives, health, and possible even their sanity. Pretty sad, huh?

I think it's very interesting to note that the majority of us on here agree with the I-can't-or-won't-hug idea. (Just to clarify, I am in that camp too. My OCD/germaphobic tendencies aside, you don't just hug people in places like Stockton, Oakland or even Sacramento-- places I pretty much grew up in. And anyone who's heard of the places I'm referencing knows exactly why. ) But it makes me wonder how much the small community makes a difference in affecting the outcome of the experiment. Obviously, we all have similar tastes and opinions, perhaps more than we might think... Very interesting indeed.

Lynn, if you have time and can make one of your magical shorts out of this thought, I fully support that decision! Always looking for more.

Community service for Superman for his contempt of court from MoSB? Hmmmmm. That gives me another idea...

Methinks he would be swarmed by groupies. And Lois.

This is why it would be punishment (except the Lois part, only... yes... seeing Lois as a groupie would also be punishment.)

No hugs for strangers here. I actually enjoy hugging people I know but strangers are creepy...especially with a big sign and seeking out other strangers to hug. I agree that I would be suspicious of ulterior motives (theft, etc) but mostly I would think they were either strange (too strange to hug - mental illness maybe??) or a perv (if it was a guy). The whole idea kinda creeps me out. Sad, I know.

The only time I would hug a stranger with a sign is if they were a sweet little child or sweet old grandma. If they were a child, I'd probably report it though cause then you have all the creepy strangers who would LOVE to hug small children swarming and that's creepy too!

Such a sad, suspicious, cynical world we live in but the times call for it I think.