Great discussion, keep it online. My son's in-laws are 2nd generation Italian and are a huge family that has basically moved out to Long Island because of the cost of New York. Yes, it's a one hour commute by train each way, but it's way better than trying to drive, especially in the current weather. My son lives in Great Neck, which is sort of the Orange County (referring to L.A.) of New York. That is, affluent suburbs. Large family gatherings for special occasions (baby-showers, christenings) are held in Italian restaurants or Country Clubs (a family member must be a club member, but it's a large family). Some family members have summer places in Sag Harbor (but they don't think of themselves as rich!).
Some have made sizable incomes by buying homes or apartments, renovating and reselling. So they are living upmarket if they've been at it 25 years or so.
If any of that kind of stuff helps, let me know.
Artemis
