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Posted By: cp33 FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 02:03 PM
Jenni, this is so touching. Seeing Matt comforted by both parents, Lois finally believing in Clark and Clark beginning to become more of himself.

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Standing amid the rubble in a business suit, he couldn't see it for himself, but never before had he looked more like Superman.
I loved this line very much.

I envy your talent with words.
Posted By: BJ Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 02:10 PM
I'm glad I double-checked before posting another thread. Cp33 beat me to the punch.

Wonderful part, Jenni. Full of vivid descriptions and strong emotion. I've been lucky enough never to have experienced anything as horrendous as war or natural disaster, but your descriptions of the bombing aftermath made it so real.

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Standing amid the rubble in a business suit, he couldn't see it for himself, but never before had he looked more like Superman.
Wow. What a great image. I understand why Clark is so bereft at the loss of his powers - they've always been such an integral part of his self identity - but I think he doesn't give himself enough credit. He really is something special.

And this...
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Matt was resolute and strong, but so young to be a hero. He hadn't had time to find his anchor.

In the meantime, Clark resolved to keep a close watch on his boy.
I've never appreciated Jonathan Kent as much as I when I read those lines. I could even hear it in his voice. The influence an ordinary human man can have on his superpowered son is priceless. I only hope that Clark can remember his own dad when looking out for his son.

Even more than the values that Jonathan and Martha were able to give Clark before he became a superhero, Clark can also mentor his son in how to deal with the situations he might encounter in his 2nd job.

Fantastic.
Brenda
Posted By: robinson Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 02:33 PM
Beautifully written. Your writing is so visual for me. I had the scene at the hospital perfectly pictured in my mind as well as the emotions.

I love the sentences below. Clark knew he had his anchor in Lois but Matt had not found his Lois so Clark would be there for his son just as Lois was there for Clark and her son.

'While the group said goodnight, he felt Lois slip her hand into his and knew he would find peace in her arms, if only for a few short hours. He just hoped Matt could sleep and wouldn't be haunted by nightmares.

Matt was resolute and strong, but so young to be a hero. He hadn't had time to find his anchor.'

I would love to see more of Lois and Clark connecting in the next chapter. You write so well the love they feel for one another. it is tangible in every word.
Posted By: TOC Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 07:27 PM
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Standing amid the rubble in a business suit, he couldn't see it for himself, but never before had he looked more like Superman.
Brilliant...

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But Lois ... As she met his eyes, she smiled and gave a tiny nod of her head. Clark felt a spark of energy flow into his weary mind and body. Lane and Kent were once more a team, united in their determination to put this monster behind bars, to find justice for those he had killed and maimed.

While the group said goodnight, he felt Lois slip her hand into his and knew he would find peace in her arms, if only for a few short hours. He just hoped Matt could sleep and wouldn't be haunted by nightmares.

Matt was resolute and strong, but so young to be a hero. He hadn't had time to find his anchor.

In the meantime, Clark resolved to keep a close watch on his boy.
Yes, I know that these lines have already been quoted. But shouldn't we keep repeating and quoting brilliance? After all, how many times have people repeated that E = mc2?

Ann
Posted By: IolantheAlias Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 08:55 PM
Excellent scene.

First, the description:
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Through the drifting cloud of dust, the stage clung like a drunken shed to the front of the hospital, while many of the windows were gaping holes, some strung with giant, shark-like teeth. An eerie silence had fallen over the stricken arena, punctuated, now and then, by the agonizing scream from a survivor, or the soft barking of the police dogs as they went about their work, searching for the dead and injured. Further away, the sirens of the fire engines echoed through the canyons of downtown Metropolis, increasing in volume as they converged on the site.
Sight, hearing, smell, all referenced in those vivid passages. You really make the scene come alive, Jenni.

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“But what if I could have contained the explosion?” Matt's expression was stark. “I should have been able to stop it, somehow.”

“Son, don't torture yourself with 'what ifs'. You couldn't have foreseen what was going to happen.” Clark flexed his back stiffly.
And you wrote so well the bitterness of "might-have-been". I can just see the characters in their post-rescue fatigue, dealing with their survivor guilt. A very moving chapter.

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They were bowed, but not broken. Jimmy might need a little more persuasion to see things his way, and Matt ... well, he was probably biased in his favor. But Lois ... As she met his eyes, she smiled and gave a tiny nod of her head. Clark felt a spark of energy flow into his weary mind and body. Lane and Kent were once more a team.
Yippee! Yahoo! The universe is back in balance!
Posted By: Beth S. Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/13/08 10:35 PM
I really liked Clark in this chapter. He really seemed to come across as a lot more secure and confident.
Posted By: amberlea Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/14/08 01:48 PM
Wow. Your writing in these last two parts has been so powerful. I love how your character portrayal is so realistic and accurate. The trauma they've all come through and the way it has affected each of them is so clear, and yet the strengths of each that are essential to their family are equally evident.
Jenni

I love how this chapter focuses on the aftermath of the disaster, not with the actual disaster though, but with how it effects Matt and his family.
It is strengthening Clark.. re-awaking the superman he is. It is bringing clarity to Lois in who Clark was, and is again becoming.
It is providing a turmoil for Matt... and I really enjoy seeing how this is playing out for him... a wrong step could turn him into a rogue super-hero.. and that would be bad...
In the meantime, the last line of this part was poignant. Clark knows he has to watch Matt.. and even without powers, I get the impression that Superman might have to guide and strengthen him more than either know yet.

I also found it interesting the cops might think they are dealing with 2 bombers.. one being a copy-cat. I've heard of this as a tactic before to try and enrage/draw out the bomber.. so I am curious as to how that pans out.

I have one criticism though Jenni... I want more, more, more!!! I love you're writing style.. as has been said.. it's vivid, clear.. and a strong picture into this family. It makes my week when I see you've posted. grovel grovel grovel
Posted By: Mister Data Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/15/08 08:18 AM
Loving this story.
Posted By: Nan Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/15/08 02:12 PM
I'm glad this situation made Lois realize at last just who Clark really is. He will always be Superman, powers or not, and he will always be a very competent journalist, whose judgment should at least be respected, especially by his wife.

Poor Matt was probably to be the most pitied here, but at least he has his dad's experience to draw on, as well as Lois's tenacity. As long as he can gain the right perspective on this kind of mess, he's going to be all right. That's what his parents are for.

I hope Jimmy decides to take seriously Clark's suspicions about the bomber. Not that Clark is always right -- far from it -- but Jimmy needs to remember that he has very good instincts, no matter what happened to him over the last few years. Just because he went through a very bad time doesn't mean he changed from being one half of the Hottest Team in Town.

And last, it's good to see Clark becoming Superman again, not through his powers, but through his attitude -- although if his powers continue to defy Dr. Klein's predictions, I won't mind <g>.

Nan
Posted By: Terry Leatherwood Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/19/08 07:21 AM
I really - really - should know better. But I was put off by the title of this story without even glancing at the author's name. I'm so sorry, Jenni. I've taken far too long to let you know how much I like this tale so far.

I've just caught up with Clark's struggle to reintegrate himself into the "normal" working world. It rings so true, especially the difficulty he's having in resuming his "daddy" role. That's a hard enough job without the trials he's been through. And his stop-and-start relationship with Lois seems right on the money, too. It stands to reason that she'd expect him to pick up where he left off and try to protect him from harm all at the same time.

Will Clark's powers return? My thought is that he'll be stronger and faster than the average man and will have better hearing and quicker healing, but I think Bernie's right about the powers not coming back all the way. But even if they do, I don't expect to see Superman back on the scene, not with the amount of time that's passed since his last appearance. And given Clark's missing finger - and it's a very nice touch to make pulling at the missing finger the focus of Clark's expression of tension - it would be extremely difficult to conceal the similarity of the injuries.

I promise to keep up from now on, Jenni. And I promise not to be put off by a mere title. This story transcends the struggle between Clark and Lois and how they're going to "normalize" their relationship. It's full of excellent characterizations and conflict and stress - and love.

And that makes it all worthwhile.
Posted By: Jenni Debb Re: FDK: MyWife, the Boss part 12 - 08/20/08 04:18 AM
Hi,

Wow! I can't believe I'm reading such wonderful comments about my story. I'm amazed but very, very grateful. smile

It's always been my hope to create a visual picture with my words, but I'm never sure if I succeed. So knowing you could see the scene outside the hospital was very satisfying.

I'm also very happy to be picking up more readers. Terry, never apologize for coming to a story late. Believe me, I'm just glad you've taken time to leave me fdk.

Thank you, everyone, for taking time out of your busy lives to comment. The long fdk posts are brilliant, but I know that some people find it difficult to find the words, so I'm very grateful for just a line or two. smile

Now, I'm extremely happy, but extremely scared. I just hope the rest of the story lives up to all your expectations.

Yours Jenni
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