Lois & Clark Forums
frown I was crying by the end of this chapter! Holy Cow, this is so sad. I hope they find this B*st*rd soon! I can't imaging going through that. I can't believe that they are holding it together the way they are. More soon. Oh...it wasn't near long enough wink Laura
Wendy, you have an incredible talent for this... I *loved* the part where Lois realized that Clark was being strong for her, but he needed someone to be strong for him -- and that was her job. That's one of the aspects of their relationship I've always loved.

Good for Henderson, getting Clark to super-listen to the tape -- even if it was rough on Lois, hearing it again. A shopping mall, eh? Here's hoping that turns up some sort of clue. They haven't got all day, you know frown

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“I can get the equipment set up in a room for you - it’ll take about five minutes. Just say where.”

“Conference room’s fine.”

Henderson’s eyebrow went up. “Yeah? What about Lois?”

Clark smiled. “She knows. It’s okay.”

A nod of understanding. “Don’t know why I ever thought otherwise. Okay, five minutes.”
I always like to think that Lois knows Clark's secret before anybody else does... and this reads like she did, but I'm wondering which one of them actually clued in first. Not that this matters at all. I suppose I'm fixating on the trivial to avoid bawling all over my keyboard!

And the thing about her parents... ick, in her place, I wouldn't want to be dealing with them, either. Here's hoping she can avoid it all, somehow.

PJ
Wendy -

This is masterful.

Too short, but masterful smile

Can't wait for the next part!

Shells
Okay Wendy, yes we appreciate the long part, but you've gotta give here! Please, just post the rest of the story! I hate it when my toys need fixin'.

I was in tears here. This is so sad.

Please post more soon. mecry
Appreciate the long part? Appreciate the long part?! How can I appreciate the long part when every perfectly written sentence makes me want to crumple up and cry my eyes out?!? razz ]

This is just so wonderful. Really, really, really wonderful. I adored it all, so it's difficult to pick out favourite parts, but here -

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She was a quivering wreck. If it wasn’t for Clark, she’d be a useless lump of cowering jelly on the floor. As it was, she was a useless lump of cowering jelly in his arms.
- made me laugh and cry at the same time, and here -

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“I’m not giving up,” she told him, speaking quietly. “But I’m not going to fool myself, either. He was right. This is my last big story, and I’m not going to be around to see it in print.” The lump in her throat she thought she’d got rid of was back. “Maybe I should start writing it - at least then I’ll get a byline on it.”

“Lois, don’t!” The pain in Clark’s voice was a wake-up call. She wasn’t the only one suffering here. And, while he was trying to be strong for her, he needed someone to be strong for him, too.

And that was her job. Had always been her job. She was his best friend, after all.
Oh. My. God. Ohmygod. Words leave me. whinging

Sara [bottom lip wobbling, supply of tissues exhausted, hands shaking as hard as poor, pooooooooor Lois's...]
Lois is slowly falling apart, both mentally and physically. Ohmygoodness. You're doing an excellent job making us see the deterioration and how it affects Lois and Clark.

Please let them find the antidote soon.

gerry
Hi,

Great part. thumbsup All mall have security cameras and also the story inside the mall.


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She left the cubicle and stumbled over to the sinks to run some water. By the time she’d rinsed out her mouth, she felt a little bit better. Still shaky, and her stomach still hurt, but at least she wasn’t nauseous any more. Just as well - she wouldn’t be any use at all out pounding the streets if she was having to stop to throw up every few yards.

God, when she got her hands on the bastard who’d done this to her...

She ached all over. Her hands were shaking. She could barely walk straight. Her vision was blurry. Her energy levels were almost at zero. And now the tips of her toes were tingling. Plus now for some reason she seemed to have no sensation at the top of her left thumb.
eek The symptoms are coming fast and soon she’ll be in a bed.


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Maybe she’d be unconscious, or in a state of semi-paralysis, or whatever, by midnight. Maybe even earlier. “Okay, by eight tonight, I’ll tell them.”

That gave them five hours to do something.
frown The most difficult calls! Hope Lois tell her parent her decision of Clark being there.


More ASAP, please.

MAF hyper
Hmm.... they're getting closer... if knowing from where he/she called is it... whinging
smile1

simona smile
WENDY MIDDLENAME(IFYOUHAVEONE) RICHARDS! Get back here right this instant!!! mad

How can you do this to me??? Between lines like this:
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“You recognise him at all?”

She shook her head. “Not that I know. He’d disguised his voice...”
And this:
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“Did you get a trace on the call or not?”

Henderson blew out a breath. “No. They were almost there - another few seconds would’ve done it.”
I am going nuts, which I'm sure is the point - to see how many of your readers have to be institutionalized before you post the next ELEVEN parts... omg, I can't do it. I can't hang on that long! I mean, I will and everything (assuming I don't get committed over this), but it's a lot to ask. razz

Okay, so all I have to say about this part is "wow". And by that I mean WOW. This was just filled with so many amazing things (and I for one definitely appreciated the length!!!)

Clark figuring out it was in a shopping mall... by the harbor... well, that was brilliant. Henderson suggesting he listen to the tape, and then that at least paying off (you threw us - and them - a bone and I thank you for that) was great. I loved how he could hone in on the different music tracks (I realize I should never be a cop/detective/investigative journalist or anything of that nature because I thought he was in a weird disco or something!! blush )

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Screw the first amendment - if tapping her phone could catch this bastard then she was all for it. If they were able to trace the call...

Then she’d have a chance to live.
SO Lois. Love it! thumbsup And I'm glad that she recognizes there are ways, even if she thinks them slim, for her to live.

I love how you show that even in the midst of this god-awful day with everything going on, they are both thinking about each other, acting in ways that show us (and them) how they know each other better than they know themselves. EXAMPLES smile

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another few seconds would’ve done it.”

“Damn.” The word came out softly. “Don’t tell Lois - she’s feeling bad enough as it is.”
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Reluctantly, he stayed where he was. He couldn’t coddle her. Much as he wanted to wrap her up in cotton wool and make sure she couldn’t do anything to hurt or over-exert herself, this was Lois. She wouldn’t appreciate it.
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There was no need to tell him about this. He’d only worry, and he’d obsess about having forced her to eat. He’d think it was his fault.
They're very in tune with one another. I LOVE IT! laugh

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I’ve listened to it - this is one sick bastard.” The inspector’s expression was coldly furious.
I love how without spelling it out and without wasting time, you show how much Henderson really cares. And this man is really putting on his A-game today, which is great, because L&C are a little too involved to focus (as we see when Clark continuously chastises himself for not doing this and not doing that...)

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Henderson wanted him to super-listen - to see if he could detect any background noises, anything that might give them clues as to where the guy was located. Quickly, he nodded. “Yeah. I should have thought of that.
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It was entirely possible that the guy was watching them, something he should have thought of himself.
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Was shaking a symptom of ricin? Why hadn’t he read up on this stuff?
I know I'm nearly just reposting your whole section, but I can't help it. Like I said, this was wow. Just a reference to the parts that broke my heart in two:

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Lois shook her head. “I... I’m still drawing a c... complete blank. I really don’t think h... he’s anyone I ever met.”

Her whole body was shaking. Ice-cold chills ran through him. He stood behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders. She leaned back against him, and after a few moments the tremors stopped.
I love that he has that effect on her! That he can comfort her so much (and that she willingly lets him) as she's falling apart!
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“Lois, honey, you are our top reporter. Three Kerths in the last three years. Of course the big boys upstairs think you’re valuable.” His lip curled sardonically. “At least, that’s the type of argument they listen to.
Aw, Perry! smile

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She reached out and squeezed his arm - or tried to; for some reason, she couldn’t get her fingers to obey her brain’s command very effectively. “Thanks, Perry.” Before she embarrassed herself again, she turned to Clark.
This is so sad! She is losing control and she's embarassed which is sad, but so human! So real. Especially for someone like her that doesn't easily admit to weaknesses. Nice thumbsup
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All the time she’d wasted... all those months when she’d treated him as if he was beneath her notice. Or a convenient lapdog. Except he’d never been a lapdog; not really. He’d always let her know when he wasn’t happy with her. It was just that most of the time he’d gone along with what she wanted.

He’d crept under her guard and, before she’d known it, he’d become a friend. A close friend. The best friend she’d ever had.

And now, when it was too late, the truth was finally clear. He - as Clark, not as Superman - was the most important person in her life.
Mush. Seriously. I'm mush! Wendy!!!!

Okay, just one more. The line that broke me, made me a goner:
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“You’ll stay with me till the end, won’t you? Don’t let my parents or the doctors make you leave. Promise?”
Excellent, Wendy. As upset as I clearly am that you've gone away and won't post most likely for a few days, I will tell you that. This was EXCELLENT! And I demand more! NOW!

smile smile

~NICOLE

ps- between you and me (and anyone else reading this folder), what's the poison, who's the killer? wink
Arrgh! You truly are evil incarnate! To post something this wonderful and this suspensful and then just leave it where you did? Truly cruel!

But absolutely amazing! SO very sad, and at the same time edge of your seat-nail-bitey-worrisome! Lois and Clark are absolutely heartbreakingly in character!

I want the rest of the story darn you! Grrrr! wink wildguy
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She was useless.
Awww. Poor Lois. frown

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Henderson wanted him to super-listen
Yeah for Bill hyper

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All the time she’d wasted... all those months when she’d treated him as if he was beneath her notice. Or a convenient lapdog. Except he’d never been a lapdog; not really.
Absolutely LOVE this. Well done.

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I want you to have my rolodex.
Were it anyone else, this would seem lame, but with Lois it's completely perfect. How do you do this?

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Don’t let my parents or the doctors make you leave.
This part was dramatically tense and just great. Had me on the edge of my seat the whole time. Totally worth turning on the pc at this ridiculous hour.
dizzy This is so sad!! I cannot believe that there is still 11 more parts!! How will I manage to get through them!!! I mean with all the tears in my eyes, it makes it pretty hard to read this stuff. All I want is a little hope. Some progress, a lead, a clue that she will make it. She will make it, right? frown Throw me a bone here!!

Besides the fact that I am going nuts reading this, I want to say that you are amazing. You are writing this so well, you can't help but to feel for the characters. I love it!! Please post soon!!! grovel

Jen a
I'm in a rush, but I did not want to let this chapter go without leaving you props. Excellent, excellent writing. The tension in tangible, and I can truly imagine myself in the shoes of both Clark and Lois. I love how each one is trying to be strong for the other, something that is inherently a part of the pairing, IMO.

Beautiful installment; I am eager for more. smile
You know... you always manage to put these toys back in the box in the same condition in which you found them... but if I were those toys, I think I'd start hiding at the bottom of the toybox when I saw you coming! goofy

Seriously - this is SO good. Everything everybody else said, and more.

I think it's so cool that Clark could listen to the tape of el-Creepo and figure out that he's (she's?) at a shopping mall near the harbor. I'll bet e-C hasn't thought about that at all, hmmm? That Superman might be able to get a few more clues than the average listener. Now... if only there were security cameras aimed, as Maria suggests, in the right direction... With 11 more parts, I'm imagining that ol' e-C looks like everybody else. <sigh> grumble

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WENDY MIDDLENAME(IFYOUHAVEONE) RICHARDS!
rotflol rotflol rotflol
Ditto!

You've got everybody down so well - Henderson is fantastic, grimly determined to solve this if it's at all solveable, and he's devoted all of his time to this.

Lois and Clark - well, as you've already been told, your characterizations are fantastic - each one is thinking of the other first. Clark, of course - we've been seeing that throughout this story. But the parts where Lois realizes how much he means to her - as Clark - and where she's trying to protect him in at least a little way... that's just so good! Well done!

You know, Perry's a minister, right? Maybe a quick little... ceremony... would help guarantee that Clark would have the right to stay with Lois right up to the end... eek Ack! What am I saying? I didn't mean 'right up to the end' literally, okay? All right? Ignore that part. laugh

Hurry with the next part, okay? So I can quit holding my breath?

~Toc
WOW! eek I'm too speechless to say anything so ... thumbsup whinging whinging mecry
Those personal moments between Lois and Clark are so sweet and so touching and so... just right there.
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She opened her mouth, but her vocal cords refused to work. So instead she reached up and touched her lips to his.

He started slightly, but then his lips moved under hers, kissing her back, a gently sweet kiss that ended almost as soon as it had begun. Wistful regret filled her as he drew back to gaze down at her.
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“Just promise me something.”

“Anything.” He brought the car to a halt at traffic lights, then turned to look at her.

“You’ll stay with me till the end, won’t you? Don’t let my parents or the doctors make you leave. Promise?”

He muttered something she couldn’t catch. Then he reached across to squeeze her hand. “I promise, Lois. Nothing could drag me away from you. If... If it comes to that, I’ll be right there beside you. I swear.” His voice sounded almost hoarse.
Awwwwwwww. Darnit. I hate you. <g> These short pieces of dialogue between them convey so much emotion.

And having to be strong for each other is... terribly true and realistic. And I supposed he doesn't want her to worry about him. I truly love your B-plot, in case I haven't made that clear. <g>

I love your A-plot too, but you're being too secretive!! <G> And I bet you're enjoying this too. So spill the beans. Who is it? I'm guessing the mall thing didn't bring them that close, did it? And even if it did, it would take a while to find the guy./me is suddenly sure we'll only find out in part 21...

Julie wink
/me peeks back into the folder and distributes Kleenexes all around... goofy Anyway, I'm still posting three times a week, and the story is finished, and I'm not going away any time in the near future, so you should be able to hang in there, right?

And thank you - and the others who did it - for quoting all those lines and paragraphs you especially liked. I really appreciate it so very much!

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All I want is a little hope. Some progress, a lead, a clue that she will make it. She will make it, right? Throw me a bone here!!
Aww, poor Jen! All I can say is... read and find out. Cause you wouldn't really want me to give spoilers, would you? wink

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You know... you always manage to put these toys back in the box in the same condition in which you found them... but if I were those toys, I think I'd start hiding at the bottom of the toybox when I saw you coming!
ROFLMAO, Janet! rotflol


As ever, there are a lot of specific comments and suggestions I'm not commenting on, some because of time and some... just because. But be assured that I value each and every comment posted, that I've read them all over and over and that I treasure every word. Thank you seems so inadequate, but believe me when I say I mean it.

And to show my appreciation, part 11 is coming up just as soon as I can get it posted. Just for those non-Americans who are still reading fic today!


Wendy smile
Ok...I am reading all the parts at once....and here I am, in part 10, before I start with part 11 I have to tell you that YOU ARE KILLING ME whinging whinging whinging whinging

I cant believe it whinging Lois is going to die, Oh My god and they can not find that sick bastard.....

And I need to read more parts of this torture, my husband is looking at me as if I were going to die myself....GODDDDDDDDDD whinging

Ok, stop writing and start reading....again....or like lois says FOCUS, FOCUS I can not give up now.... whinging

Karla
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